He left soon afterward, the awkward tension driving him away. I joined the others outside, trying to shake off the feeling.
We had some nice, normal days, the three of us acting like a family as Peter and Emmett used me as a buffer for their growing relationship. But my smiles were weak, and my heart wasn’t in it because all I could think about were the children the Council had possession of. Emmett, Val, and the twins were all safe, but it wasn’t enough. Not nearly enough. I hadn’t found a way of fixing everything.
And then there was Eddie. He had made it clear he wanted a new start, one without the Council, and maybe I hated them enough to turn to him. But I wasn’t sure who to trust and if I might be releasing a bigger monster onto the world.
Esther came to me a couple of days later, her arms wrapped around herself. I invited her in frostily, but she seemed not to notice. She wandered into the house as if in a dream, and a glimmer of worry wormed its way into my chest.
And then I smelled the blood. “What’s happened?”
She looked at me, and the hollowness in her eyes scared me. “I couldn’t stop thinking about that baby. I had carried her through, and she kept calling for her mama. She wouldn’t stop. They said she’d stop after a few days, but she never did. Even in her sleep, she cried. I heard her in my dreams, Ava. Every night, the same cries. And you heard that boy; the child had just been brought there. She remembered her own people, and she missed them.”
“Okay. So what happened?”
“I stole her from the Council.” She held up her hands at my gasp of surprise. “I know, but I read the newspaper reports and found her surviving family. Her mother was alive, Ava. She had been on a weekend away when it happened. Her sister died in her place, and she was distraught herself. She looked so much like the baby, and both of them were devastated, so I took the baby home. And the mother was so unbelievably grateful.” Spittle flew out of her mouth at the urgency of the word. “The baby stopped crying for the first time. She smiled and held on to her mother so tight. It was… I’ve never seen so much love before.”
She gulped a couple of times, her eyes wet with tears. “And then they came. They must have known what I would do.”
“Who came?”
“The Council sent Guardians for her. Aiden was with them. My own brother. And he grabbed me, held me so tight I couldn’t move. Even if he hadn’t, I might not have moved an inch. I was frozen to the spot. And they… and they…”
“It’s okay,” I said as the tears rolled down her cheeks.
She shook her head. “No,” she moaned. “No, it’s not. Coyle… put a dagger through the back of the mother’s neck so hard it went straight through. She was still holding the baby, and the… and the baby was covered in her mother’s blood. She opened her mouth, but she… she didn’t cry. She never cried. Not even when they both fell to the floor.”
I felt my own eyes fill with tears.
Esther was devastated, and the words came faster. “I reached for the baby, but I slipped on the… on the blood, and someone else took her. I couldn’t see straight. There was nothing… it was so quick. They left me there, said I had to clean up the mess I made, and Aiden… Aiden did nothing to stop them. And the baby saw everything, and she didn’t cry. She couldn’t cry.”
She ran to the bathroom and threw up repeatedly. I realised Peter was standing in the doorway, having heard the whole thing. His eyes held an icy glare, and I felt the old Peter returning. I waited for Esther to finish, and then I let her cry on my shoulder. She was so young, so naive in some ways. She had so many expectations for her life, and she felt such pride in who she was, but inside, she was a little girl who couldn’t deal with the reality of her world.
“I should never have trusted them,” she said at last. “Everything I’ve done, it doesn’t come close to this. Did they send me on the trainee missions before? Is that why I’m so shocked by this? Why would they do it? Why kill her like that? The baby… that poor baby. And now they have her, and she’s worse than before because she can’t cry.”
I felt cold as stone sitting there next to her. We were reaching a turning point, an important one. The Council were the protectors, those murderers of innocents.
“Are you willing to do something about it?” I asked when she composed herself. “Are you willing to go against your own brother for what’s right?”
She nodded vehemently. “I can’t stand by anymore. When they said they were keeping the children, it was hard enough. But this… this is a step too far for me. I’m not a murderer, Ava. And if this is what Guardians have to do, I can’t be one of them any longer. I can’t call myself a Guardian—or a shifter—and feel pride anymore.”
“If you step up, they’ll all turn their backs on you—the Guardians, the Council, and even your pack. Are you truly willing to lose your brother? Your family? Your pack?”
She closed her eyes and thought for a few minutes. When she opened them, her expression was clear, calmer than before. “It was my fault. That woman died because I tried to do the right thing by a baby we were supposed to save. It’s all dead to me now. All of it. I’m not giving up on that little girl. Not now, not ever. I have to get her home, or I’ll never be able to live with myself.”
“I think we should go back to Folsom’s place,” I said. “I think we need to talk in a safe place.”
“I’m so sorry. I endangered you all by coming here.”
“No, you didn’t. We’re friends, and we can protect ourselves.” I took her hand. “Just because you won’t have your pack doesn’t mean you’ll be alone, Esther. Family’s more than blood.”
She blinked back some tears. “They’ll come for me. I didn’t… clean up the mess. I went to pieces and came straight here. I didn’t know where else to go.”
I gave Peter a heads up and decided to take Esther to Folsom’s place. She didn’t know what it was called, and I wasn’t about to tell her. I needed to leave that to others. But she deserved a chance at redemption, at least, at redeeming herself in her own mind. What had happened was awful, truly disgustingly terrible, and the Council were going to pay for their actions. I was more determined than ever.
No matter what it took.
Leaving Emmett and a frustrated Peter in the safety of the cul de sac, I escorted Esther to the Féinics to hold a meeting with the people Folsom protected. We talked about what happened with the children, and Esther told her story. The sad part was that, although people looked saddened, they didn’t seem surprised by the news. I didn’t know most of their names, but we all had the same cause. We were all in some kind of trouble because the protectors weren’t protecting.
“I need help,” Esther said. “I need to help. I can’t stand by and watch…”
Val, sitting next to Lucia, nodded. “I may be safe, but I don’t want any of the protection those people are offering.”
“Same here,” Lorcan agreed. “I don’t want to be a friend of that pack if these are the kind of actions they take.”
That hurt Esther, I saw it in her face, but she didn’t argue. She knew it was too late to defend her people.
“What can we do?” I asked. “Right now, I’m the only one above ground.”
“You should hide too,” Folsom said. “It isn’t safe up there anymore.”
“I’ve people who need me. And I don’t want to hide away. I want to fight this, and it’s better if there’s someone finding out what’s going on. There’s so much that needs to be done. Besides, I work for Daimhín; she will be mightily pissed if I disappear. And there’s Emmett. I need to protect him, and I don’t want him imprisoned down here. No offence,” I added, looking around apologetically.
“It’s understandable,” Kate said. “He’s been trapped for so long.” I was kind of surprised she even remembered who Emmett was. Then I realised something. These people were waiting around for news, waiting to hear about the life outside. They were trapped, too. They needed to be free. It wasn’t a safe haven; it was a prison, at least wh
ile the Council existed.
“Whether you like it or not, the world considers you to be rebels,” I told them. “Maybe it’s time to rebel.”
“Now? Are you a complete idiot?” Cam let loose, startling everyone. He acted as though he didn’t care, but I saw through the act.
“How so?” I asked calmly.
“You said yourself there’s a war coming. A country without real leadership is screwed. Screwed even more than before. Your stupidity is astounding.”
“Who says the war is coming today? Anyway, do you think the Council will actually protect anyone?”
“It’s better than nobody protecting us,” he said.
“We should wait,” Folsom said after a few minutes. “No, hear me out. We should let the British vampires do our work for us, and all the while, we build the cause in secret. No more hiding and hoping for the best. We make our own future.”
“What if the war wipes out everything?” Lorcan asked. “The vampires are serious about this. Do not underestimate the lengths they’ll go to.”
“We’ll have to stand side by side for a time, and in their moment of weakness, we attack. We turn traitor.” I moved closer to Lucia, and she held my hand, giving me exactly what I needed, an image of a possible future we could play on. “We need more power. We need someone who will think we’re helping him, but really, we’re using him. If I’m like a conduit, then someone with a lot of power could come in handy. Changes are coming. And we’re running out of choices.”
“What is it you people really want to accomplish here?” Cam asked, and I heard the worry in his voice. “Kill them all?”
“Of course not,” I said. “We aren’t like them. We need a new order. New rules, modern ideals. No more archaic bullshit. We need new leaders. There will be death, but there are probably others who will be on our side. We need to find them.”
“I don’t like this,” Cam said. “I won’t be a part of this.”
“Then you should go sit with the Council,” I said harshly.
Everyone stared, but nobody said a word. If I had to be a monster, then so be it, but nobody was standing in our way. Nobody would get a chance to stop me.
Epilogue
It had been a while since I entered the bookshop, but it smelled the same as always.
“You,” Eddie said under his breath.
“Thought I was overdue for a visit,” I said. “How’s business?”
“Terrible. Where’s my employee?”
“He needed a break. Life at a bookshop can be really stressful. Can we talk?”
“Isn’t that what we’re doing?”
I smiled sweetly. “Koda’s going to die soon.”
“There is that,” Eddie said, but his eyes spelled out his interest.
“The Council will need a new member.”
“Truth. A shifter, perhaps. Maybe something a little… darker.”
“You have experience, right? Why not you?”
His smile was devoid of amusement. “Because it won’t be me. Why don’t we skip the chatter and get straight to the part where you tell me what you want?”
“I want change. Don’t you?”
“Change is always a great thing,” he said reverently.
“Allies are great, too.”
He nodded, never letting his eyes drop from mine. “’Tis true enough. But as they say, change tends to happen when the majority rule.”
“But how to get the majority,” I said, wandering around the book stacks. “Did I ever tell you what Gabe wanted in exchange for healing Carl?”
“You did not,” he said in a clipped voice.
“Ah. There were two things, really. I had to find the slave market. That’s ticked off now. Although, it didn’t really work out the way I planned it.”
“And the other?”
“Oh, that. I was supposed to find the rebels. What’s the word Fionnuala used? Oh, yeah, the Féinics.” I didn’t tell him the third part of the deal, finding out what Eddie was up to, nor my own personal mission, figuring out more about the magical book hidden in his home.
He straightened. “And you did. You did, of course. Are they many?”
I shrugged. “It’s not the numbers really. It’s more what they can do. And those children, they’re the special ones, and that’s why the Council kept them for themselves.”
He nodded. “A nasty turn of events.”
“You heard me at the meeting. You know of the ones who helped me bring the Guardians to the market?”
He nodded enthusiastically. “I’ve heard rumours that one is a hell hound. And I heard you say you have a seer. I can only imagine…”
I went to the counter and leaned over it. “You can’t even imagine what’s down there. Who’s hiding with the rebels,” I said breathlessly.
He rolled along with my enthusiasm. “Enough… enough to change it all?”
“There’s power there. A lot of it. But nobody to lead it. Nobody to wield it.”
“Not even you?”
I grinned. Clever Eddie. “I’ve never been a leader. More like a lone wolf. But they trust me. Said I could be… the face of something. Reminds me of something you would say.”
“There’s a lot I need to do.”
“There is. But there’s time. Nobody will think of making a move until we deal with the threat of war. And war is certainly coming. The only question is how hard. How soon. But the good thing about a war is the opportunity to help, to impress. And war takes time to organise, so there’s plenty of time to… make friends.”
He nodded again, his eyes dreamy. He could already taste the power. He needed power. Whatever he was trying to do required a lot of power. Yeah, well, ditto.
“The children,” he said abruptly. “I’ll need the children.”
I faltered, and he saw it, so I didn’t bother lying. “Nobody can hurt them,” I said at last.
“Of course.”
He lied, and we both knew it.
***
I strode into Gabe’s bar with my hands in my pockets, humming a tune. Aiden was there, speaking in hushed tones with the angel.
“Oh, look who it is!” I said mockingly. “Kill any mothers lately?”
He ground his teeth, making an ugly noise.
“I hear you’re an only child these days,” I taunted, unable to help myself. I wanted him to show regret. Guilt. Something. Anything. I needed to know for sure that he was gone into the shadows. One way or another.
“What are you talking about?” he snapped.
“You betrayed your own sister, right? So she’s not hanging around here, is she?” I looked around in an exaggerated fashion. “Looks like she’s disowned you and your pack.” I made a faux sad face.
“Where is she?” he snarled.
“None of your fucking business,” I said slowly, making sure he heard every word. “You gave up that right when you killed an innocent woman in front of her and a baby, and ordered her to clean up the mess. You sick—”
“It wasn’t me!” he roared, and Gabe put his arm in front of him.
“No, you just stood there and watched. You just let her sit there in the blood like a traumatised little girl. You just let them take a baby who may never get over being covered in her mother’s blood. You fuck!”
“Aiden, get out of here,” Gabe said. “You’re losing control.”
“Run along, Aiden,” I said. “Sharpen those claws for your next victim. Should I line up a virgin for you? Or a newborn, perhaps?”
It took a while to get Aiden out of the bar after that. I sat on the bar and laughed as he struggled to get at me. It took everything in me not to rip off his head. Or at least try. But I had bigger plans. I needed to play everyone at their own game. And making Aiden lose his mind and control was just part of it.
Maybe then I could see why someone with such strong morals could fall into such a deep downward spiral so quickly. Of everyone, no matter how frustrated he made me, Aiden was the one person I thought Esther could trus
t. I thought she was more important to him than the Council. I couldn’t believe I had been so far off the mark, so I studied him for any hint of the dark shadows as the bouncers dragged him outside.
Nothing. But I couldn’t give up on him yet, at least not completely. There had to be an explanation, some magic at work… but no, that was the old Ava talking. New Ava had to be harder, had to make tough decisions, and that was exactly who the new plan needed.
“What are you doing here?” Gabe asked in a tired voice when the drama finally ended.
I stared at him for a couple of seconds, wondering if he was the mysterious “uncle” who had visited Peter all of those years ago, if he’d had any involvement in the way our lives had turned out. My eyes narrowed, and he inched away from me as if he could tell what I was thinking.
“Why don’t you go home, Ava?”
“We have deals to sort out,” I said snippily.
He frowned before finally nodding. “Back room.”
The last time I had been there was when Finn knocked me out with his ridiculously potent fae drink. Not the best memories.
“People have been looking for you,” he said.
“You know where I live.”
“We do, and yet, nobody can find it. Your landlady is formidable.”
“That she is,” I said, mentally praising and thanking Mrs. Yaga in my head. I had to repay her for that one.
“Do you want him to kill you?” he asked, handing me a bottle of water.
“He could try,” I replied with a grin. “And he deserves every bit of it after what happened.”
He nodded. “He had orders.”
“Whose orders? What kind of person follows orders without even giving it a second thought? Without even considering if they’re doing the right thing?”
“Good soldiers,” he said without hesitation.
“Like you?” I asked innocently. “Angels are soldiers, right? They follow their commands without asking questions. So, why is it that you’re fallen again?”
The look he gave me left me shaken, but I couldn’t back down. He was the one to break the silence.
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