“Why did you think it would have made any difference?” I asked.
“It has in the past. Every girl or woman I am with usually wants the title that comes along. Even Leticia is only with me because she wants to be queen,” said Rafe.
“Well, I am not like that,” I said, pushing him away and folding my arms across my chest. “I was already in love with you when I thought you were an outlaw.”
Rafe smiled. “You were? You are?” he asked, a little apprehensive, as if he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. But he still didn’t say anything about how he felt. He was always so mysterious; I had no idea what he was thinking.
“Yes, you silly fool,” I said, now waving my hands about. “I think I fell in love with you from the first minute you walked into that dungeon. I didn’t even know at that time if I could trust you or not.”
Rafe strode over to me, grabbed my arms gently, and pulled me to him. He looked into my eyes for a soul-searching moment, and his lips descended onto mine in the most urgent of kisses. I melted into his arms as he pulled me closer to him, his arms tightening around my waist. I wrapped my arms around his neck and closed my eyes. In that moment, I felt the whole world melt away. There were only Rafe and me and a world of possibilities before us. I never wanted this moment to end. It was everything I had wished for and more.
Finally I broke off the kiss, which had left me gasping for air. When I looked back up at him, his grey eyes were focused and staring straight into my own with an intensity I had never seen before.
Rafe held me close. “You are the most beautiful, courageous, and fascinating girl I have ever met,” he said. “I cannot help the way I feel. I know it’s wrong. But ever since I met you, you are all I think about.”
“What about Leticia?” I asked breathlessly, my heart leaping at the possibility that Rafe really may have feelings for me.
“Leticia is my betrothed only in name. It was a promise I made to my mother before she died, when Leticia and I were still very young,” Rafe said.
“But you cannot go back on your word,” I stated. I knew the answer before I even asked the question.
“No, I cannot. There is no way I can change the course of these events. Leticia and I will be married next spring,” he said.
I disentangled myself from Rafe’s arms and pushed him away.
“Then why did you kiss me?” I asked, stunned.
“I couldn’t help myself,” he said truthfully. “Ever since I saw you in that dungeon at Oblek’s castle, wearing those funny clothes, I was completely besotted. I wanted to get to know you before I revealed who I was, or my feelings for you.”
“I quite doubt that,” I said, now hiding behind my anger, which had started building up slowly but steadily.
I didn’t believe him. And I absolutely refused to be someone he had on the side, with Leticia as his bride-to-be. Then it hit me. I had been so stupid; of course he was only toying with me. He never intended to give up Leticia for me. It was the most humiliating moment of my life, and my heart was crushed, smashed into little bits. I was not sure I would ever be able to fit it back together again.
Rafe looked confused. Why was it that men never thought anything of being unfaithful? I thought to myself.
“I can’t do this,” I said finally.
“What do you mean?” he asked carefully.
“I mean that you are betrothed to Leticia, and I know that you cannot break your vow to your mother. I respect you for that, but I cannot be with you and kiss you knowing that you are to be married.”
Rafe was silent.
“And what about after you finally get married, what then? I will not be your dirty little secret. I will not let you treat me like some tart,” I said, trying very hard to keep my voice under control.
He suddenly looked more confused. “Tart?” he asked. “What kind of tart?”
If I were not so angry, I would have laughed. “Not that sort of tart, silly,” I stormed, but in a whisper, because I didn’t want anyone to hear us. “I won’t be your mistress, or girlfriend on the side, or whatever you were planning. I won’t do that.”
Rafe looked upset for a second, but he soon composed himself and had that charming smile back on his face.
“I never asked you to be my mistress, Aurora,” he said. “I would never presume to do so. I am sorry I offended you. What can I say? I lost my mind for a moment. And as for the feelings I have for you, well, there is nothing we can do about that. You are right; we can never be together. I am betrothed, and nothing I can do will change that.”
I just clutched my skirt and stared at him.
“I guess this is good-bye. I will take your leave, Princess,” he said formally. He bowed briefly and took my heart with him as he turned and walked away through the flower-filled garden and into the autumn night.
I tried not to cry, but my heart was breaking, and I watched Rafe longingly as he disappeared into the crowded ballroom, leaving me standing confused and alone in the moonlit gardens of the Summer Palace.
26
The Council
The next day, I lazed about in bed the whole morning, nursing my broken heart. Since I didn’t want to meet anyone, I ate in my room.
Finally I pulled myself from my slump and dressed carefully in a pale-grey silk dress, with a high collar and long sleeves. I wanted to look older, as I was to meet with the council. The king was going to announce that he supported my claim to the throne of Illiador, and Uncle Gabriel had said that there was to be a meeting to discuss the upcoming war. Would Rafe be at the council meeting? I hoped so. I knew that, if I had any sense, I would stay away from Rafe. But the thought of never seeing him again was too upsetting to even think about.
“I’m ready,” I said as I stepped out of my room.
There were two guards posted outside my door, and I felt a bit like a prisoner, even though Aunt Serena had said that they were only there for my protection. One of the chainmail-clad guards grunted a response and gestured for me to follow them.
Two footmen in blue-and-white livery opened the huge double doors to the council chamber, and the guards posted themselves on both sides of the massive door. Did I have to enter alone? I hesitated a moment, but I didn’t want to let everyone know how scared I was. I had to meet the council, the lords of Eldoren; they, along with the king, would decide my fate. If Eldoren refused to accept my claim to the throne of Illiador, then I would have nothing: no army, no kingdom, probably no life.
Even if I did manage to stay one step ahead of Morgana, what would my life be like? I would have to run and hide forever. I would never be able to have a family, as they would constantly be under threat from Morgana. This was the only way. Even if I didn’t end up as queen, Morgana had to be stopped.
I entered the room slowly, dragging my feet, so I had some time to look around. The council chamber was a huge, bright room overlooking one of the inner courtyards of the palace. Benches rose in tiers on two sides where the lords of the council sat, and the king was seated on a raised platform facing me.
Lord Rothguard was there, as was the Marquis of Greystone, my father’s friend. Uncle Gabriel sat next to two extremely old lords who didn’t look like they could even stand, let alone hold a sword. I noticed, much to my dismay, that the Duke of Blackwater, Damien’s father, was also on the council. Leticia’s father, the Earl of Glenbarry, was among the gathered lords. These were the people who would decide my fate. I noticed one chair closest to the king was empty. Was that meant to be for Rafe?
Where was he? Why wasn’t he here?
I stopped in front of the benches as everyone stopped talking and turned to scrutinize me. Lords Rothguard and Greystone smiled at me reassuringly. Aunt Serena told me that I didn’t have to curtsey anymore. I was royalty, and no one would follow a queen who bowed to others.
“Let us proceed,” said the king loudly so everyone could hear. “We are pleased you are alive, Princess Aurora. And Eldoren would like to offer you our support against
the forces of Morgana.”
The Duke of Blackwater stood up. “If I may, Your Majesty,” he said, in a soft, slimy voice. “How can we be sure that this person is indeed the Princess Aurora? Last I heard, Morgana massacred the whole family and all of Azaren’s friends and supporters. She could be a shapeshifter sent by Morgana herself to find out our plans. She may even be an assassin, Your Majesty.”
I snorted very inelegantly at this. “Assassin, oh please!”
Uncle Gabriel, who had remained quiet until now, stood up. “I have inspected her myself, Devon,” he said to the Duke of Blackwater, “but if you are not satisfied with my word, would you like the princess to remove her amulet and show you who she really is?”
The Duke of Blackwater didn’t look too pleased at his answer. “You saw what she did to my son in Evolon,” he said, pointing his bony finger at me. “She is a monster and should be locked up.”
“It was a mistake,” I said, interrupting. “I didn’t mean to hurt him.”
The Duke of Blackwater ignored me. “All we know for sure is that she is a rogue fae-mage and wears the amulet of Auraken,” he said, glaring at Uncle Gabriel. “That doesn’t prove that she is Azaren’s daughter.”
I wiped my sweaty hands discreetly on my dress. I was getting worried. What if they refused to support me because of what I had done? After all, Damien was from an important noble family, and now it looked like many people were actually scared of me. I wanted to be liked, not feared, and I didn’t particularly like being called a monster. But I figured no one wanted an episode like what had happened at the test in Evolon. Everyone had now heard about it, and the whole city was abuzz with the news that I was alive and well and here at the palace.
“Well, she does look a lot like Azaren,” said the king, looking at me. “And Morgana too, actually.”
Suddenly the doors swung open, and Rafe sauntered in. I tried to look away, but I lost that battle quickly. He was dressed casually in tight breeches and high leather boots; his sword hung from his belt at his side. He was wearing a sleeveless leather doublet belted over a white shirt with the cuffs rolled up. His shirt was open at the neck, and he looked heartbreakingly handsome.
“Good morning, Father,” Rafe said as he nodded to Uncle Gabriel and took his place beside the king. He looked at me as he sat down; for a second our eyes locked, and I quickly looked away.
“Where have you been? The council meeting started a while ago,” said the king to his seemingly wayward son, going red in the face. “And what are you wearing? Have I not made it a rule that you must dress formally for council meetings?”
“I was detained, Father,” said Rafe casually. “I did not have the time to change.”
The king didn’t look pleased, but he knew this was not the time or place to fight with his son, so he looked away.
“Now, where were we?” said the king. “Ah yes, Princess Aurora is to be given the full support of the council and its combined forces. If and when Morgana attacks, we must be ready. I want all of your troops prepared for an invasion; every last soldier must be alert. Professor Dekela has assured us of the support of Evolon and all his warrior-mages as well as the healers.”
The Duke of Blackwater, realizing that his objections had been dismissed, quickly sat back down in his chair.
“If I may, Your Majesty?” piped in the Earl of Glenbarry. “How can we be sure that the princess can control her powers? We all heard about what happened at Evolon, and I have it from a high authority that she lost control of her magic. How can we be sure this will not happen again inside the palace? It would put many innocent lives at stake, like my dear daughter—soon to be your daughter-in-law.”
Rafe laughed at this. “I do not think the princess will pose a problem, Glenbarry. As long as she has the amulet on, her powers are in control. But if you feel so strongly about the safety of your dear daughter, maybe you should let her stay at Glenbarry House in the city instead of here at the palace,” he said.
“No, no, Your Highness,” said the pompous Earl of Glenbarry, sitting back down in his seat. “I am sure you will see to it that my dear Leticia will be safe.”
Rafe did not answer and chose to ignore his soon to be father-in-law.
“But what if she decides to take the amulet off again?” said one feeble old lord with a long white beard and a balding head, who looked like he had just woken from his slumber. “There are many who now fear her, and many who feel that she should not be here in the palace, at least until she has mastered the use of all her powers.”
“Are you afraid of a seventeen-year-old girl, Lenard?” said Uncle Gabriel, addressing the old lord and getting up from his seat.
“No, no, of course not,” sputtered the old lord, “but there are many who . . .”
“Your Majesty!” said Uncle Gabriel, ignoring the old lord and turning to face the king. “Princess Aurora will not be a threat in the least. You have my word.”
“And that is quite enough, as far as I am concerned,” grinned the king, as he adjusted the heavy crown resting precariously on his head.
“Thank you, Your Majesty,” said Duke Gabriel, giving the king a short bow.
“Well, if that is it, we have many other things to discuss with the council,” said the king. “Aurora, you may leave. You are free to do as you wish; stay within the palace grounds and you will be safe.”
I nodded and withdrew from the room. They didn’t even let me get a word in. But I preferred to keep to myself for now. There was no need to tell them what I was thinking. I decided to just let them think that I was meek and easily moldable. When the time was right, I would show them who I really was, and God help anyone who tried to stand in my way.
I wandered around a bit and walked through the tiered gardens of the Summer Palace, down flowering paths and mossy steps, to the very edge of the white cliffs that plunged like huge white walls into the sapphire depths of the Stardust Sea.
I inhaled deeply. The smell of the salt air and sea wind took me back to happier times when my adoptive parents would take me on holidays to a little shack we had on the seaside. When I thought of them, my heart still ached from my loss. They may not have been my real parents, but they loved me like a daughter, and frankly they were the only parents I had ever known.
Now that life seemed so far away, almost like a dream. I had finally accepted that Avalonia was my home and Illiador was my birthright. My aunt had stolen it and betrayed my parents in a horrible act of treason, and now it was up to me to see that my parents’ legacy did not die with them. I was going to be seventeen in a few days, and it was time I grew up and faced my responsibilities. It was up to me now to do what was expected of me, to do my duty, and to do what was right.
I sighed and turned to leave, when strong arms gently enveloped me from behind. I was momentarily startled, but I didn’t have to turn around to know who it was. I would know him anywhere.
Rafe leaned forward and brushed my cheek with a soft kiss. I didn’t pull away, even though I wanted to. Just being in his arms again made me feel like everything was right with the world. I couldn’t understand the connection between us. I didn’t want to feel this way, because I knew it would ultimately lead to heartbreak, mainly mine. But I couldn’t help it. I was in love with him, and nothing he said was going to change that.
I leaned back on his broad chest and rested my cheek on his arm. We stood like that for a few minutes, not saying anything, just looking out at the vast sea.
Finally Rafe broke the silence.
“I am sorry about last night,” he said gently, and sincerely. “I shouldn’t have left you in the gardens and walked off.”
“It’s all right,” I said, still not looking at him. “It’s better this way anyway. You and I can never be together. In a few days, I will be going to Elfi, you will get married, and we will probably never see each other again.”
He turned me around to face him. “I wish I could change the way things are, but I cannot. Do you have any idea
how many nights I have thought of you and wished that our circumstances were different?” he said seriously, looking me straight in the eyes. “I have tried to stay away from you, but I can’t. I even went away for a while, hoping that I would be able to forget about you, but all I could think about when I was gone was when I would see you again.”
I hugged him and rested my head on his chest. His strong arms wrapped me in their warmth, and I closed my eyes and wished that Rafe and I could be together always.
“It was just not meant to be,” I whispered, choking on the words as I said them.
His embrace tightened as he gathered me closer to him, kissed me on the head, and smoothed my hair.
“I don’t believe that,” was all he said.
He let go of me and held out his hand. “Come,” he said gently, as I intertwined my fingers through his, “I will walk you back to your room.”
“Thank you,” I said, “but I had a pair of guards following me around. I don’t know where they went.” I looked around. The scruffy guards had miraculously disappeared.
“I sent them away when I came to see you,” Rafe grinned.
“I thought you would still be at the council meeting,” I said.
“I will find out what I need to know when I speak with your granduncle later today,” said Rafe, shrugging.
“So Uncle Gabriel knows who you really are?” I asked, quietly glancing around to make sure no one heard me.
Rafe nodded. “He knows the real identity of the Black Wolf, yes.”
“Why does your father think you are running around in brothels and taverns and wasting your life away?”
Rafe laughed. He came closer and spoke softly. “My father had refused to send an army to help the fae against Morgana, so I do what I can for the ones who are left in Illiador.”
“Then why are you letting him and the rest of the court think you are some wastrel spoiled prince with too much time on his hands?” I asked, because it upset me whenever anyone spoke badly about him.
The Last of the Firedrakes Page 30