by Lee Savino
“I have to fight,” I whispered. “If I don’t fight…I’ll give in completely.”
“That’s it, baby. That’s what I want.” He pulled me closer, into his arms. His lips found my ear. “Give in to me.”
“You don’t understand. I’m afraid I won’t be able to stop. Cole,” I pushed away from his chest to meet his eyes. “You’ve always been my weak spot.”
Excitement flared in his eyes. “Then let go and give us what we both want.”
“I’m scared.”
“Baby. You can trust me. You know that.”
I nodded, and let him hug me again. I’d never felt anything so good as Cole’s arms around me, his firm chest under my cheek.
“I’m going to take care of you,” he said. “You know I will.”
“I do. I just don’t know why you’d want to.”
“Because you’re mine.” His hands slid up and down my back, setting every nerve afire. “You were always mine.”
Chapter Nine
Cole’s phone rang, breaking the spell between us.
He groaned. “I have to take this.”
I rolled out of bed as soon as he left the room, and went to the mirror. My ass was as red as expected, but not bruised…yet. All in all, it wasn’t as bad as I thought.
You were always mine.
Cole’s words echoed through my head. Did they mean what I thought they did? Or was he just stating the obvious? Of course I belonged to him. But was he mine?
The answer to that question would either break me, or set me up for life. Either way, fear gripped me.
Miserable, I crawled back into bed. I was so in love with him I couldn’t breathe. It overwhelmed me. This whole week I’d done everything on his stupid list. I scrubbed the man’s toilet for godssake, and felt blissfully happy. If that wasn’t love, I don’t know what is.
Did he reciprocate? Was all this business of “claiming me” teasing? Just a game to him? He had everything handed to him on a platter. Worse, he didn’t take it for granted. He worked hard. He was the finest, most upstanding citizen of Licking Hole, maybe even the entire state.
And I belonged in jail.
Cole’s voice echoed down the hall and I settled back on my side of the bed.
It wouldn’t work. The sheriff and the screw up. The golden boy and the girl from the wrong side of the tracks.
Cole finished his call and returned to the bedroom. “Regina?”
I didn’t answer. I lay on my side with my eyes squeezed shut, pretending to sleep.
After a moment, he lay down and fell asleep beside me. I let my breath out then, a quiet whine against the hurt I felt in my chest. Lying next to a man, knowing he could never love me—the pain of the punishment had nothing on this.
***
I was quiet the morning he drove me to volunteer. No more protesting. I had to finish up my time with Cole, and get the hell out. He’d tire of me and let me go. I just had to be a good little Regina, and obey without complaint.
My silent vow lasted until Cole pulled up to a pretty brick building with sign reading “Maple Grove Senior Assisted Living.”
“No,” I said. “This is where you want me to volunteer? No way.”
“You promised.”
“I can’t.”
“Just try. For me. Just do as I say. Don’t think about anything else.”
Silently, I cussed him out.
A well-dressed woman with short, curly hair stood on the curb waiting for me.
“I’m Betty,” she said, shaking my hand. She looked about as old as my mother, and though she had a no-nonsense handshake, she wore a big smile. “I’m the activities director here at Maple Grove.”
Activities director?
She waved goodbye to Cole and turned to me, cocking her head. “Sheriff Townsend says you’re between jobs and volunteering until you find a new career?”
I shrugged. “Something like that.”
“We’ll go easy on you. You’re going to be helping me in the Orchard.”
“The Orchard?”
“What we call the wing of our facility that houses our dementia patients. Right this way.”
I took a moment to mentally murder Cole before I followed.
The door opened to the dreaded scene. But instead of the horror show I expected, I saw a pretty room with cream wallpaper. There were even a few potted plants. Residents in wheelchairs faced a TV, but some also sat at tables playing with a craft.
Everything seemed neat and clean, and while not all of the residents were smiling, it looked like they had a good life. Maybe even better than mom’s in the trailer.
I waited to reserve judgment until after Betty’s tour. She showed me everything, from the kitchen to the residents’ rooms. She ran the residents’ social calendar, and took fun seriously.
“Thursdays Jenny White comes from Licking Hole Fitness and leads the residents in aerobics. Well, she plays music and gets them to move as much as they can. It seems to be good for morale. And Friday we always have a party.”
“What about today?”
“I hoped you might have some ideas,” Betty said. “Why don’t you get out among the residents, see what they’d like?”
By lunchtime—served at 11 am—I mingled with the residents.
“You’re so pretty. Are you married?” a white-haired lady asked.
“Uh, no.”
“But you’re so pretty!”
I saw Betty wave me over, pointing excitedly to a box of supplies. “Uh, thank you. I think I have to go—”
“Of course. Go cook dinner for your husband.”
“Oh, no, I’m not married.”
“But you’re so pretty!”
And so on.
My big breakthrough came when one of the ladies, a Mrs. Jameson, challenged me to a game of canasta. I organized a group of six, but I didn’t know the rules, and she didn’t remember them. In the end, we made them up.
“Hearts!” one gentleman shouted, and we all laid down our cards, groaning.
Betty walked by, nodding approval. On my suggestion, she’d gotten another group of octogenarian residents around the table, coloring like kindergarteners.
By the end of the day, I had a list of ideas for her, including casino night and more senior aerobics. Several gentlemen requested the return of Jenny White the fitness lady. She was good for their moral. Or, at least, her tight, spandex clad ass was.
I didn’t realize how many hours had passed until Mrs. Jameson started clapping in excitement. Cole stood in the doorway, casual in jeans and a t-shirt. My heart skipped a beat.
“What a handsome man! Is that your husband?”
“No, ma’am. But he is my ride.”
She nodded knowingly. “You better go home and cook him dinner. You don’t want that one to get away.”
“Did you have a good day?” Cole asked as I ran up to him. I nodded and blushed as one of the residents shouted, “kiss him!” and let out a wolf whistle. I grabbed his hand and pulled him outside before Cole got any ideas. A visit from the local sheriff was another idea for Betty’s Calendar of Fun. Cole would be a big hit with the residents. If all else failed, I could just make out with him in front of everyone.
“What are you smiling about?”
“Nothing.” I smoothed my features.
“I guess you had a good day.”
“It was all right.” I let my thoughts wander, and Cole let me. We got home, and I put on my costume without him asking, and made dinner.
After the meal, he set down his fork and caught my hand.
“What’s on your mind, Regina? It’s not like you to be so quiet.”
“Maple Grove…how much does a place like that cost?”
“A lot of money.”
I sagged in my seat. “Figured.”
“Don’t tell anyone this, but I heard that some employees get pretty substantial discounts.”
I glanced over at him sharply. It sounded too good to be true. “There aren’t an
y positions open. Betty told me that.”
“Yes, but Betty wants to retire.”
I went still. It sounded too good to be true.
“Do you think if I volunteered there for a few months, I’d be a good candidate for the job?”
“I think you’d be a shoo-in.”
I closed my eyes. I wanted this so badly for my mom I couldn’t breathe.
“It won’t work. I need money, now.”
“My guess is that Betty might hire on someone part time sooner rather than later. As for the rest…it just so happens I need a live in maid for the next few months. It pays pretty well.”
I smiled. “Does it now? I hear it’s worth it just for the other…perks.”
“Is that what we’re calling orgasms now?”
“If you like.” My smile fell away. “I can’t ask you to pay me.”
“You didn’t ask. I offered. What’s more, I’ll pay your bills directly, and order you to accept it.” He rose and cleared his dishes and mine. I stared at the woodgrain on the table, wondering if things could really get better, wondering if I dared to hope.
“If your mom moves there, you could sell the trailer. Move in permanently. Maybe even go back to college, finish up your degree. They have a commuter program. I checked.”
I closed my eyes. “Cole, I can’t.”
“Course you can. I’d pay for it.”
My eyes flew open. The handsome man across from me offered a smile that looked almost shy. And I realized that for the past few days, I’d been living in a dream.
Time to wake up.
“Why?” I asked. I made my voice hard.
“Why?” He frowned. I noticed his cheeks were flushed.
“You heard me, Cole.” I leaned forward. “Why would you do this? Why wouldn’t you just arrest me that night? Anyone else would’ve gotten in trouble.”
“Haven’t we been over this?”
“No. You never really answered. You say things like I’m claiming you and you’re mine and I just go with it. But I don’t know what any of it means.”
“Isn’t it obvious?” Now his neck was just as flushed as his face.
“No.” I suddenly was fighting tears. If it wasn’t important enough for him to say how he felt about me, then all of this was blackmail. And I was no better than a whore.
“Because I like you, Regina.”
Fury surged through me. “Like?” I waved my hand at the kitchen. “I am wearing a ridiculous costume. I even wore these torture things for you-” Reaching down, I pulled off the shoes and threw them at his head.
Cole raised his arms and pushed back in his chair. He started to rise and I beat him to it, standing so fast my own chair almost fell over.
“And all’s you can say is that you like me?” I screeched so loud the neighbors could hear.
“Regina, look.” His cheeks burned red as if I’d slapped him. I didn’t know if he was angry or embarrassed. “I’m not good with words like you—”
“Try, Cole.”
He took a deep breath and—
Nothing.
I shoved my chair back and stomped to the living room.
“I’ve got to go.”
Cole followed. “What are you doing?”
“What I should have done in the first place, instead of embezzling. Find some rich guy and suck his dick until he pays all my bills. Someone who isn’t you. All this time I should’ve used my body and I’ve been trying to use my brain. Silly me. Thanks for enlightening me.”
I picked up his landline—he kept one as sheriff. He took the phone out of my hand and threw it against the wall, where it shattered.
“What do you think this is?” He advanced. “You think this is some sort of game? That I would tell you I’m claiming you and then sit back and watch you walk out to another guy?”
I backed away. “Cole, I—”
“Answer me,” he shouted.
“You’re scaring me.”
He gripped my chin. He still looked pissed but his touch was gentle. “Good. Maybe then you’ll understand.”
“Understand what?” I pushed his hand away. “You make me do all these things for me, and you can’t even say what I am to you? A lover…a friend…a hot piece of ass? Just tell me where I stand!”
Cole’s chest rose and fell like he’d just run a mile. “I can’t.”
“Why not? Isn’t it enough that I obey you? That I want to be with you? I know you’re waiting for someone special—I just want it to be me!”
“Don’t you get it? It is you.”
“What?” I dropped to the couch like my legs had been cut out from under me.
“It’s always been you.”
“Then why—”
“I had to be sure.” He rubbed his hand over his head. “I wanted you to be sure. I don’t just want sex with you, Regina. I want it all.”
I shook my head, not understanding.
“I want this.” He waved his hand at my outfit. “I like spanking you. And controlling you. And overpowering you. I’m not normal, Regina. I never have been. I look at you, this beautiful woman, and I want to control you. I don’t want to settle down and treat you like a queen. I mean, I do, but here, and in the bedroom, I want to spank your ass raw and have you serve me on your knees. And I want to do more. I like having you as my slave. I need it.”
I studied his tense face. “Is that it?”
“I needed to know you could handle it.”
“Let me get this straight.” I stood up, but I was shorter than him. Climbing on the couch, I looked him in the eye. Standing on the furniture was probably against the rules, but Cole didn’t comment. “You’ve wanted me all this time. You just wanted to be sure I was sure.”
“Yes.”
“All of this has been a test?”
“I have these urges,” he said. “You need to understand what I am.”
“What are you, Cole?”
He pressed his lips together.
“You’re not a freak,” I reassured him. “You’re a dominant. You like control. Guess what, Cole?” I indicated my outfit. “I’m okay with it.”
“I have this darkness inside me...”
I cupped the side of his face. “I love your darkness.”
He leaned into my palm, his eyes fluttering closed. His long lashes lay against his fine, flawless skin. His beauty was so unreal, it amazed me that I could touch it.
I bent my head to his. “Let me be your dream girl,” I whispered. “I’ll do whatever you want. I want to be your fantasy.”
Please, please, let it be me, I pleaded silently. I held my breath like a prayer as his hand came up and clasped the back of my neck. His touch remained gentle, but he tightened his fingers slightly to hold my forehead against his.
“I can’t stand the thought of anyone else touching you,” he said. “I know I’m crazy but…I’m crazy about you. If I take you, I’m never letting you go.” He opened his eyes. The honesty there hit me like a blow. “You agree to be with me, and then get mad and try to leave, I’ll hunt you down. If anyone tried to take you from me, I’ll hurt him. Does that scare you?”
“No.” Wrapping my hand around his neck, I took a deep breath, and told the truth. “Cole, I’ve always belonged to you. Always.”
He kissed me, and then his hands were everywhere, touching me, claiming me. His hands went under my bottom, lifting me from the couch and setting me down to my feet. His kisses were ferocious, and I gave as good as I got.
He pulled at my top and I heard it tear. I struggled out of it, ripping it further. We kissed like we were dying, and the touch of the other’s lips held the cure.
I pulled away for a second. “Smack my ass.”
“Regina,” he groaned.
“Fucking do it,” I said, and winced a second later when his palm connected with my ass. Pain reverberated through me, bringing my body to life. “Harder.”
He sat and pulled me across his lap. His left hand clamped down on the back of my neck,
holding me down as he spanked me harder.
“Like that?” He thrust two fingers into my sopping pussy, finger fucking me roughly. It would’ve hurt if I wasn’t so wet.
“Yes,” I moaned.
He pulled his fingers out and gave me a vicious swat. “You’re going to be my naughty girl.”
“Always. You better fucking keep me in line.”
“Language.” He slapped the top of my thigh. “You better mind. Or you’re going to get a lot worse than my hand.”
I reared off his knees, fighting as much as I could. “Prove it.”
He pushed me to the floor. I ended up sprawled at his feet, cheek to carpet, ass in the air. I heard the snap of leather a second before he struck me with his belt. I cried out, and he stopped.
Bracing my hands against the carpet, I pushed my ass up higher and demanded, “More.”
The belt bit down. Pain sliced through me. Again, and again.
I shook with desire.
“You’re going to learn,” Cole emphasized his words with another strike.
Quivering on the floor, I couldn’t answer. Arousal flooded through me until all I could think of was Cole taking me, claiming me. Each lick of the belt was a kiss—hard and dominating. I could take the pain. I could take anything from him.
By the time he threw down the belt and knelt beside me, the pain felt miles away.
“You okay?” He pushed my hair out of my face.
I nodded as much as I could with my head down, and ass up in the air.
He drew my head back with a fist in my hair. “You trust me.”
My eyes watered with the sting, and I blinked them away. “Always.”
He let go and I sagged back to my hands and knees.
“To the bedroom, sweetheart. Crawl.”
I crawled. By the time we got to the bedroom, I didn’t dare stop, lest I leave a puddle on the floor.
“You’re doing so well,” he told me as he pulled me up by my hair and guided me into position. My front half lay on the bed; my bottom poked back at him, a perfect target.
I steeled myself for the lash.
It never came.
Stubbled cheeks scraped my tender backside, making me cry out. Cole’s tongue probed into the crevice, and I cried out for a different reason.
Lurching forward, I tried to scramble onto the bed, but Cole held my thighs in an iron grip, pulling me back against his mouth. He’d dropped to his knees behind me as he ate me out. I gave up fighting and panted against the bedspread.