“The hell? Why?” And how strangely specific.
“Giant bats. They live in the trees and aren’t too kind to newbies.”
“If you haven’t noticed, I’m a people person. I give off an approachable aura, that’s why I do so great with strangers.” I cross my arms, nodding.
“That’s a lie.”
I gape.
“And these aren’t people. I mean it. Be careful out there. You wouldn’t want them playing toss a wolf or you risk getting bitten.” He leans forward, pecks my nose, and winks. “That’s my job.”
Chapter Four
Typical me, to not tackle the ideal thing to do and instead, go right into exploring. Yup, my bags are still where Jefferies left them by Gavin’s bed, unpacked but down a pair of jammies that I donned—and now, I, Kokoa the Magnificent Motherfucking Adventurer sets course.
While chatting away with my best friend on the phone.
Adventurers always need a sidekick.
“How is it?” Piper asks on the other end.
“Stereotypical. Creepy, dark, the usual. But awesome. It’s big and not cold though, so that’s nice. Oh, and no moat.”
“Damn.” Piper giggles. I join in, as I leisurely stroll the first floor, passing many closed doors and dim hallways. The phone is sandwiched between my shoulder and cheek, while my hands were free to deliver popcorn into my blowhole.
“Lucas and I are going to Club Kitty tonight,” she states.
“Oh, poo.” I pout. “I want to go.” Crunch goes the death of another caramel ball. Club Kitty is our hangout spot during a couple nights of the week...
Okay, most nights.
The place is my mecca of toxic drinks and ass poppin’ music.
“I’ll drink twice as much in honor of my absent BFF,” Piper declared.
“Gods, you’re the best. One last hoorah before flying out to the fam,” I presume correctly when she makes a noise of agreement.
“That and I need to be loaded to deal with Lucas. I overheard a convo between him and some chick on speaker phone after you left. Let me tell ya, the wretch sounds sickening.”
“Who is she?”
“Don’t know... yet. I’ll see her tonight since he’s bringing her to the club to make Yasmin jealous.”
Scrunching my face, I come to a stop in the middle of the carpeted hallway.
“Not cool. I mean, Yasmin may not be into him, still—Lucas in cahoots with that squishy brain of his is making for a sucky night.” I don’t like him trying to get her attention this way, who knows what he plans to do? Nor do I like that he’ll potentially be the one that’s gonna get burned in the end.
Though, I always secretly hope he scores some points...
“Watch him,” I instruct.
“Of course.” She sighs. “I love the kid but he’s kind of an idiot.”
***
After parting with Piper, I shove the cell phone in a pocket of my jammie shorts, and resume exploring and snacking—though, that doesn’t last.
“Aw.” Pouting at the empty bag, I fold it into a small square and also shove that in a pocket. I’ll toss it once I find a trash can... somewhere.
I’m quite far from where the kitchen is.
Orange glowing lanterns are fixed on the walls, I’m in an area that has a library and a few lounges—their open doors reveal this.
Except for one, slim, closed red door, I’m now positive Gavin was sneaky and quick to avoid my attention.
Checking to see no staff walking by, I step right up to the door. I hear... laughter? Ear to the wood—yeah, a TV playing sounds of an audience laughing. That’s all. I don’t sense anything else. I rock on my heels, biting my lip. Alright, I’m caught in a dilemma. Not a diabolical one, let me make clear.
This nose loves to sniff in places that it does not belong.
What to do... what to do... hmm.
I could just open the damn thing. Yet, it may be locked but it’s still no harm. I wasn’t confined to Gavin’s room like a prisoner; he must know I’m going to wander. However, there’s that pesky entity in my head who always seems to pop up during times of possible mischief, reminding that Mama didn’t raise no impolite, nosey hoodlum.
A slow smile creeps across my face.
But is Mama here?
The cool rose designed brass door knob turns underneath my palm. Soundless, it goes all the way around. Not locked. I hold my breath, and apply a little push forward. The door doesn’t creak. Blue light illuminates my exposed skin as I step inside but not completely. This is just supposed to be a daring peek that has the reasoning side of me in a total upheaval.
The wall I’m near is covered in floral paper, the door obscures what’s beyond, inching it outward—the dark room outlines a kitchenette ahead—a fridge and counter. Odd, that’s all it contains. The floor is wood paneled.
My frown deepens upon the absence of much furniture. Finally, the door is out of the way, and reveals the rest of the box-like room.
In the center is a recliner, facing an old TV from before the invention of flat screens. Oh, the horror. VHS tapes are stacked around where it sits on a low stand.
”Here’s a sneak peek of tonight’s AFV! We dare you not to laugh.”
Holy, Tom Bergeron! America’s Funniest Videos is playing. That explains the audience laughter.
Around the recliner, the floor is littered with empty tequila bottles.
And blood packets.
Someone is here.
Okay, now would be the perfect, and yep-smart time, to remove myself.
But then again, the universe has other plans of scaring the shit out of me.
A pale bony arm appears from the overstuffed chair. Bent, it lifts the body it’s connected to, and up stands the smallest woman I’ve ever seen. She’s got to be what, two, three feet? I mean, I’ve come across short gnomes, trolls and mud goblins.
I’ve just never seen a short vampire before.
That’s clearly what she is. Usually, the presence, the scent of unacquainted vampires is delayed to the senses of wolves—that’s been an issue since a long time ago when we were at war with them and explains why, at first, I hadn’t picked up anyone behind the door. A few hours since Gavin left I’d gotten used to Jefferies and could sense him.
But back to the present. I watch, in growing fear of her noticing me.
Hello, feet! Work already!
Yet, she doesn’t. Her face is out of sight as she hobbles in a sleeved black dress to the TV. Feet hidden underneath the long fabric, she manually turns up the volume. On screen, an unsuspecting man gets the blunt force of a baseball bat directly hit to the groin by a toddler.
The tiny woman cackles loudly, piercing my eardrums.
Then to my shock and envy, she three point shoots an empty alcohol bottle across the room and into a trash bin.
“Whoop!” She hops, does fist pumps, and pelvic thrusts.
Oh, it’s definitely time to go.
Back away slowly.
Back away slowly.
Back. Away. Slowly... I do, inching out to the quiet hallway.
The door softly clicks shut and I conduct a whole body shake.
Holy cow shit on toast, that was... huh?
Did I just see what I think I saw? I need to question this because there’re many incidents in my life where my brain plays trickery with my actual eyes.
Correct me if I’m wrong—
Little ol’ vamp lady is in there chilling, drunk on fun juice and blood, laughing at humans getting hurt, and just successfully Lebron James’d a glass bottle.
That just happened? Yeah?
Well, holy massive cow shit on burnt toast.
Luckily, I’m saved from further full body jeeter shakes when my cell phone vibrates.
I pull it out and bite my lip.
It’s Yasmin.
“Hello—”
“KOKOA! I DEMAND YOUR ASSISTANCE AT THE CLUB, IMMEDIATELY!”
Wincing, I hold the phone away while the t
igress continues to yell.
“Whoa, whoa, slow down. You know I’m at Gavin’s for the weekend. What’s the problem?”
“One word. Lucas.” She growls. Of course. “He’s doing that weird thing again. Jerking his body while staring at me.”
“That’s called dancing.”
“You sure?”
Unfortunately. I can’t defend it anymore.
“And who’s the girl he brought? Another token for the night?” Unmistakably, there was anger in her voice. Interesting, considering I thought she couldn’t care less.
“Don’t know. Where’s Piper?” I ask.
“Making out with Trevor in a corner.”
Great. The chick had one job. Watch over Lucas. The second her gargoyle-shifter boyfriend’s tongue is down her throat—all sense of duty is out the fucking window.
“Okay, just resort to previous protocol. If he gets to be too much, just threaten security. You know he’s harmless,” I tell her, and I hear loud and clear the wistful sigh upon her moving to a different location without music beating in the background.
“Honestly...” she says, quietly “...I don’t hate the guy. And, okay, sometimes he can be tolerable and makes me laugh—”
“YASMIN!” Holy, bombshell. I knew my silent prayers would pay off.
“Stop! I’m not implying I’d want to start something with him. And if you tell him any of this conversation, he’ll be on my back like an attention deprived monkey. Lucas, he...” She sighs again, and giggles.
My, my, my... Affection detected. But I know better than to ask if she’ll act on it. Whatever she harbors for Lucas is still deep and unreachable at the moment.
As I heard myself say to go easy on his removal, I silently hoped he kept at it.
Chapter Five
Once we hung up, my own reality slapped me in the face.
Damn that Gavin, I stomp. He specifically said that no other relative was living here at the moment. I assume she’s a VanWrath. I’d have to ask to confirm and demand what else—no, who else resides behind the many closed doors I face.
I note the many because without thinking while I was on the phone, I turned down the wrong hall. I was gung-ho on adding distance between me and Madame AFV, I was supposed to go left after leaving, not swivel right and continue on till realization finally struck.
“Um...” I do a 360-degree spin. “Oh, fucko.” Thankfully, I’m familiar with my current location. I’m on a path among numerous others in this labyrinth castle. Hands on my midriff, I internally chastise myself and utter another curse.
“Just go to bed, already,” I mumble. And I should. I’ve seen many movies where the mysterious host of a creepy ass home is rude enough to not mention the place contains secret rooms, hidden tunnels—my mind jumps to the Forbidden Staircase leading to Lucien’s private room—and happily leaves their guest stranded.
And a tad curious.
Again, I should go right to my new bed—it’s not hard to find. I’m the only wolf smelling trail that leads to it.
But my nose, having its own mind, jerks me further down the dim lit hall. I bank a short right, getting swallowed by a section containing no light at all. Yet, I don’t come across Jefferies—I wonder if he’s looking for me, or other staff members. Dammit—I can’t keep this up. I feel trouble—I have a sixth sense of it since it’s my buddy most days—certainly, I don’t want to run into someone who’ll be upset at my snooping.
Hell, there’s no denying that’s what I’m feeding into. I blame it on my button nose that tingles.
Again, I meet an unknown door. Beat up looking. The floor beneath is scratched beyond repair.
Perking her ears, the she-wolf hisses.
My fangs reveal themselves, touching the air, tasting the foreign scent that wafts through the big door.
Right, I’m the only chick reeking of wolf.
Although, I’m not the only canine in this house...
The animal in me opened the door, I swear.
It’s natural that side feels compelled to. Despite the wolf has already been screwed over worse than a curious cat.
We want to know what—
The door is heavy and slowly swings open. Apparently, impatience is here too thus the reason for me to practically barge in.
Boy, what do I find?
A hot fucking mess.
My eyes dart around the complete disaster. Like King Kong and Godzilla had decided to partake in the world’s most catastrophic pillow fight. Handfuls of cotton inners cover the floor. Gutted cushions lay limp all around. A couch, ripped to shreds, sat against the beige-colored walls. All of which are tarnished with claw marks. A foot in, I step on a squeaky toy—its murdered companions also everywhere.
I don’t discount the musky odor of canine here. It’s dulled by the weighted, buzzing air of magic.
To hide it...
In the far corner is a yellow doghouse. Beside it, three red bowls, decorated in paw prints.
I nod at this entire scene and my retreat comes sooner than in the last room.
As I move, my thigh brushes the doorway, coming into contact with something wet that seeps through, sticking to my skin.
“Gross.” I whimper. The clear substance literally sticks—strands like snot connecting to the threshold and my skin. It smells of bad breath. I quickly bend, get a decapitated teddy bear and wipe it off. Thoroughly frazzled at this point, a notion arises to suspend all snooping excursions for the next hundred years.
Because look what it’s got me.
Spying on old ladies and covered in slobber.
I refuse to think what creature it belongs to—matter of fact, what creature slaughtered all those chew toys. And let’s back up. Why isn’t this door locked? Clearly magic is in play to hide whatever, but why not barricade the damn door?
Oh, maybe it’s because there’s no need. The people here already know what lives behind the marred entrance located in a deserted dark hall.
Well, like I said—I’m done. I toss the bear down. It makes a heavy thump and whine noise hitting the floor. Just when I execute a getaway, I frown at what I’d heard. Impossible, the bear weighs nothing. It couldn’t have thumped.
Or growl.
Slowly, I pivot, facing the room again. Blood freezing in my veins.
There, wiggling backwards from the doghouse is a small dog’s furry booty, cream with a brown nub tail, hind legs...
As more of it emerges, my mouth goes slack. Holy abomination.
Back, front legs, neck...
The little bodied dog faces me—and all three of its heads cock to the side, watching in anger at the trespasser.
Despite the normal body of a terrier, one head is a black Rottweiler, in the middle a white Chihuahua, and then a gray Husky. How the hell did your heads fit inside that doghouse?
A wide spiked collar around their torso with a silver nametag reads Tim.
That’s it. One name. Like Madonna, Cher, or Cerberus—the triple headed hound that guards the gates to the Underworld.
Shit, was Tim another form of the Hell beast? It looks freakish enough for the part.
“Hi,” I say lamely to—I don’t know which pair of eyes to address. Tim begins to vibrate and make gurgling sounds.
Three yellowed fanged mouths open and begin barking and spewing more slobber.
“ARCK! ARCK! ARCK! ARCK!”
“RUFF! RUFF! RUFF! RUFF!”
“YAWP! YAWP! YAWP! YAWP!”
Claws click across the floor as Tim makes a beeline for me. And there wasn’t a chain or leash to stop them.
“Oh, shit!” I’m faster and thankfully, just right there at the door. With a slam, I yank it shut. On the other side, Tim collides with dangerous force, causing the wood to bend in the middle.
He goes at it, continuing to pound and scratch. Briefly I worry he’ll break through but I’m no longer watching to find out. Already, I’m yards away, sprinting towards the direction I came. I deserve a pat on the back for not screaming m
y fucking head off.
Nope, I high kneed ran for it, worked my lungs overtime and kept bubbles of sheer terror filled screeches to myself.
Bravo to me.
The house spits me out in the main foyer, where I finally break to breathe, hands on my knees, gulping in air and willing my heart to steady.
“Thanks to you, I’m a richer man.”
I yelp, jumping out of my skin.
At the right staircase base, Jefferies stands grinning with a bushy eyebrow arched.
“I-I, It, I was-um.” Pointing to the hall, then gesturing to my current state of rumpled clothing, I just give up. Jefferies chuckles.
“What do you mean, thanks to me you’re richer?” I ask in between ragged breaths.
“Cameras in the halls detected your whereabouts—and your curious wanders attracted our attention—though out of fun of course. Once we saw you were headed towards Tim, some of the staff and I conducted a bet whether you’d either try to pet him or flat out run away.” His smile grew.
“You have me all figured out, don’t you?” I can’t help but laugh. Jefferies joins in before continuing.
“It seems. No one in their right mind would touch that beast.”
“So, what is he? A pet?” An accident gone horribly wrong.
“A pet, yes. Only the bravest of us takes care for him.” A visible shudder rocks the butler.
“And feeds his teddy bear killing addiction?”
“That too.” Jefferies beckons I follow him up the steps. I do, feeling my limbs turn to noodles. Exhaustion was setting in. Once beside him, he continues talking.
“Lucien found Tim as a puppy, among other three headed creatures, in the basement of a new art gallery in Cairo he’d purchased. Apparently, an amateur spellcaster trespassed without detection and was illegally doing experiments, thus the mutation of Tim. He was the result of a nasty cocktail of potions and in regarding the spellcaster’s notes, Tim wasn’t supposed to turn out that way.”
Damn. He really was an accident gone wrong.
“Lucien was successful in finding and bringing the perpetrator to justice and made sure the rest of the mutations were given to safe homes. The man couldn’t bear to have them destroyed.”
Popcorn, Vampires and Forbidden Shenanigans (Grimstone Island) Page 3