“What’s the matter?” he asks breathlessly.
“Nothing,” I reply on a moan. “Just want to take this a little slower.”
He shakes his head. “We can go for another round afterwards if you want, but right now I can’t hold back.” Alexis increases the speed.
“Alexis, please …”
“I told you that the moment would come when you’d ask me to stop.”
“Oh god, shut up now, will you,” I pant, before pressing my lips against his.
His thrusts increase even more in speed, until I climax in a big bang explosion. The attendant cry is drowned in our passionate kiss. I freeze on top of him, but only a moment later, he pulls me down hard on his cock, and I feel him spend himself inside me. Alexis moans into my mouth as he presses me against him. Then we pull away from each other, gasp for air and fall back onto the bed together.
“Oh baby!” he hisses breathlessly.
“Oh yes.” That is all I can utter, since I’m at least as winded as he is.
Alexis caresses the back of my neck, while I rest my head on his chest. “I just can’t stay away from you,” he murmurs before kissing the top of my head.
“Then don’t,” I whisper, unable to resist this man any longer. There’s not fighting the attraction. Everything in me screams fire when I tell myself that I shouldn’t let him get close to me anymore. My own innermost self refuses to avoid Alexis Kingston. He’s going to be the biggest mistake of my life; that’s what I sense darkly somewhere in this turmoil of feelings, but every time my heart and my head are at odds, my heart is the one who come out on top.
“Where did that come from?” he asks, sounding confused.
I raise my head and look into his eyes. He meets my gaze without batting an eyelash. I nudge his chin with the tip of my nose. “I don’t know, but I can’t imagine what it’d feel like to stay away from you.”
He gives me a skeptical look that morphs into pity. “Don’t say that, Honor.”
“But it’s the truth,” I insist softly.
He pulls out of me and all but slams me down next to him, which I comment with a laugh. Then he leans over me. “The truth?”
I nod as I look up at him. “Yes.”
He comes closer, his lips almost touching mine, and now his eyes have a dreamy quality. “Sounds as if you have fallen in love with me.”
Got me! “What makes you say that?”
“It’s the look in your eyes,” he murmurs as he kisses the corner of my mouth. “Your words.” He kisses my chin. “Your body language.” His hand glides down my ribcage. “It’s true, isn’t it?”
“No,” I reply, forcing a laugh that is supposed to sound a little disdainful. It sounds pretty convincing, at least to my own ears.
Alexis sits up with a jerk. “I must have gotten it wrong then.” Do I detect a trace of disappointment lacing his words? Did I just hurt him? It’s too late now; and taking it back wouldn’t help. Once those words are spoken, they continue to hurt even if you say you didn’t mean them.
“Looks like you have,” I agree and sit up as well. “But that doesn’t mean we can’t continue to enjoy each other’s company, does it?”
He returns my kiss with an air of distractedness. “Absolutely not.” The next kiss is more lingering. “And now I want those strawberries.” He offers me a smile that makes his eyes glint with mischief, and then he gets up.
I huddle under the duvet, eyes glued on his marvelous physique. The man is a walking Adonis, straight out of the Greek myths. Outrageously sexy and hot … Oh God, I need to stop thinking crap like that. I just led him to believe that I’m not in love with him. I mean, I’m really not, but it’s possible that I’m in love him. There’s a big difference between loving and being in love. To love someone is a common feeling, but being in love is absolutely everything.
He joins me, snuggles up under the duvet, and opens his arms invitingly. “I’m not a big fan of cuddling, but maybe you’re in the mood?”
I smile and nestle closer. After I put my head on his chest, I steal a strawberry from the small bowl in his hand. “Aren’t you tired at all?”
“Nope. I think you fucked me awake,” he says with a smirk.
“Oh.”
His right hand moves to my breast. “That means you can have a second round if you want it.” His voice is husky and sexy again.
I look up at him. “Let’s wait and see how you feel about that when the afterglow is gone.” I offer him a smile.
“Okay.” But his fingertips find my nipple, and immediately my body is once again flooded with arousal. Good God! I haven’t had that much sex in a long time. And the sex is amazing, too. Satisfying and exciting. “I can’t wait to stick it into your tight pussy again,” he murmurs, and the hair on the back of my neck rises in response. “What?”
“Nothing.”
“Does it bother you when I say things like that?”
“No,” I protest with a smile. “I’m just not used to it, is all.”
He bites into a large strawberry and grins. “So I don’t have to hold back?”
The juice is running down his chin, and I lean closer to catch it with the tip of my tongue, then kiss the spot. “There was something on your chin.”
He nods and gives me another mischievous grin. “Good to know.”
I nestle against him again. “You think Mr. Young is going to kick my ass to the curb when he finds out we didn’t stay away from each other after all?”
“Bullshit! Maybe he’s going to go medieval on my ass, and maybe he sends you to New York to record your parts there, but that is the worst that can happen. You’re still going to go on tour with us. Plus, it’s nobody’s business what you and I are doing as long as we don’t hurt the band in any way,” he reassures me in a slightly incensed voice.
“I don’t want to harm the band.”
“Then don’t worry so much about it, Honor.”
I close my eyes and revel in the warmth he exudes, in the scent that envelops me. “Why do all of you always smell so damn good?”
“What do you mean?” he asks, sounding confused.
“Whenever I get near any of you guys, I get wrapped up in a scent that is … really beautiful,” I explain sheepishly.
He laughs. “We shower regularly?”
I can’t help but join in his laughter. “No kidding.”
“It’s our secret. Water and soap – it works wonders.” When we’ve calmed down again, I look up at him. His thumb caresses my chin. “You’re a damn amazing woman, Honor, do you know that?”
I sigh. “I’m perfectly normal.”
“Maybe that is what makes you so special. You don’t know how hard it is to meet someone who sees beyond the fucking rock star or boy band singer.”
“Since when are you a boy band?”
He smiles. “Since the second but last album, but we’re about to return to our roots with the new one.” Then he kisses my forehead. “It’s just so amazing that you really see me, not just my career.”
“You’re Alexis. A man with a great voice, but that is not who you are.”
“Well, who am I then?”
“You are Batman, and that’s a lot cooler than any band – rock or boy,” I giggle.
“You still haven’t proven that I’m him.” He pulls me closer and kisses me.
“True,” I reply between two kisses.
He leans over me, spreads my legs, and then moves to kneel between them. I wrap my arms around his neck, close my eyes and sigh luxuriantly, and he slides his fingers into my cleft.
I’m lying on one side with my eyes closed, nestled against Alexis’s back. I’m close to falling asleep, tired and satiated from another two rounds of sex. “If we keep going like this, we’ll never leave this room again.”
“Fine with me,” he says, taking my hand in his. Then he turns around so he’s facing me. He pulls me even closer; there is no room left between our bodies. “Do you mind?”
“I was just thinki
ng that we should probably show our faces downstairs, unless we want to have the rest of the guys suspect what we’re doing up here.”
“Pretty sure they already guessed that. Especially after I advised Colt not to hit on you.”
I look at him with one raised eyebrow. “Excuse me?”
“He told me he wanted to get to know you, and I told him that you weren’t interested,” he admits with a grin.
“Oh, okay.”
“Are you disappointed?”
“No, I’m just confused he wanted to get to know me. I only saw him once or twice.”
“I’m not surprised at all, because I know what an amazing woman I have in my bed.” He kisses my forehead again. “It’s really late. We should sleep, I guess.”
“You’re right,” I agree, adjusting my position so my cheek is against his breast. “Sleep well, Alexis.”
“You too, Honor.”
Alexis
Usually, I don’t let women stay overnight, and I fully intended to send Honor to her own room, too, but the thought of spending the night without her felt like a stab to my heart. It drives me crazy to think that I’ll have to push her away before it’s too late. I don’t want to do it, but it’s better that way. I’m not cut out for a monogamous relationship, because I cannot stay faithful. I know that, and I don’t want to put her through the inevitable heartbreak. She needs a man who loves her unconditionally, someone who’d never hurt her. I can feel her breathing slow down and become shallower, though her heart is still beating in rapid succession. Maybe she’s excited to be here with me.
“It was a lie,” she whispers after a while.
“What do you mean?” I ask softly. She’s talking in her sleep, which is cute, but also dangerous. For her, not for me.
“In love,” she says on a sigh. My heart drops at least three floors.
Fuck! Instead of immediately pushing her away from me as if she were the devil incarnate, I smile despite myself. “Tell me again when you’re awake.”
She mumbles something unintelligible.
I stroke her back, then her neck, keeping her in my embrace. Now I know for a fact that I’m going to hurt her once I turn my plan into action. If Linden gets wind of it, he will have my ass for breakfast. It’ll be even worse than way back when we cut him down to size after Pierce offered Thally money to stay away from him, and he did it in Linden’s name. I know my best friend pretty well – he’s going to kill me. And I also know that Honor will never forgive me, but I still gotta do it. For her sake and mine. There’s no way around doing it soon, very soon I’ll feel like shit afterwards, but at least I’ll know that I did the right thing.
Chapter 10
Three weeks later
Honor
The recordings are done and I went back to New York City, because the guys went on vacation. Home leave for each of us. Now I’m sitting in Jo’s bar, telling her about the things that went down in the Hamptons. I was just talking about the demo I recorded, because I’m in high spirits about it ever since Alexis so obviously fawned over it.
“Wow, and you’re dating that Alexis Kingston guy now?” she asks, wide-eyed with awe at my story.
I shake my head. “No, it’s just a casual thing. Having fun, you know.”
She raises an eyebrow. “You’re having an affair with the guy?”
I nod.
“That doesn’t sound like you at all, honey. You were never into that kind of thing. Remember your ex? You dated him seriously for god knows how long – until he cheated on you.”
She’s talking about Eric, who didn’t start cheating on me after ‘god knows how long’, but six months into our relationship. I only found out on our two-year anniversary, and immediately broke it off. “Alexis and I get along great, and we have a wonderful time together. A relationship would only get in the way of the casual thing.”
Jo studies me thoughtfully. “You’ve already fallen in love with the guy. I can see it written all over your face when you talk about him.”
It’s my turn to raise an eyebrow. “That’s so not true.”
“You’re in denial, honey. You’re totally in love with him.”
“That’s bullshit.”
“Honor is in love with who?” Krys wants to know. She just brought a tray full of beers to one of the tables.
“Nobody,” I protest.
“Alexis Kingston, the guy she’s having an affair with,” Jo snitches.
Krys gives me a wide-eyed look of surprise. “You magnificent slut! I knew there was something going on between the two of you that night at Spirit, but I didn’t think you’d sleep with him again.” She laughs.
“So what if I’m hooking up with him? He’s good for me, and I’m going to enjoy that for as long as I can. We’ve had to keep it a secret until now, because his friends actually warned me away from him. But it’s so much fun with him, and I enjoy that, like I’ve told you several times now.”
Krys cocks her head to one side, studies me pensively. “You know that sooner or later there’ll be a point when working with him gets tough for you, right?”
My face falls and betrays my confusion. “What? Why?”
“Because you’re going to fall in love with him, if it hasn’t already happened.”
Jo clicks her tongue. “A blind guy can see that our sweetheart here is head over ass for this guy.”
“Well, so what if I am?” I say defiantly. “That’s not going to change the fact that it’s only an affair. He doesn’t feel the same way for me, because if he did, he’d have already made that known by now.”
“You should tell him the truth – or end it before he hurts you,” Krys pipes up.
“I will most definitely not tell him how I feel! What next? Want me to show up with a ring and get down on one knee? Telling him I’m in love with him would drive him away just as fast as proposing to him.”
They sigh in unison. “Honey, please, make sure that you’re not the one who ends up heartbroken.”
I lower my eyes and stare at the countertop, a place I danced on so many times. “We’ll see.”
“Okay, there you have it, Jo, she’s stubborn as hell. She always is, when someone wants to tell her what’s best for her,” Krys complains in frustration.
“She’s an adult, so we can only tell her what we think. She’s the one who’s got to make the decision,” my boss replies before setting down a cold bottle of Heineken in front of me. “Here’s to your demo, which will hopefully open some doors.”
I smile at her. “Thank you.”
“Micah’s going to come, too. He’s out with his girlfriend.”
I give Krys a surprised look. “Since when does he have a girlfriend?”
“It’s only been a week or two; we haven’t met her yet. He told me about her on the phone earlier today, after I couldn’t get a hold of him for like a week,” she explains with a grin.
“Wow. But it’s not Zelda, is it?” I ask, worried that Micah has gone completely crazy.
She shakes her head. “No,” she laughs.
I exhale with relief. “Thank god, that would have been too weird.”
“Relax; he’s not going to marry Zelda. I haven’t met the girl he’s dating, but I asked about her – as if I wouldn’t! – and he said she’s our age.”
“Well, in that case I didn’t say anything,” I reply with a smile. “But it’s not surprising I assumed it was Zelda, is it?”
“You’re right. That was my first thought, too, and I was ready to tell him what I think of that kind of relationship, but he was quick to tell me that it was someone else.”
I nod and take a sip from my bottle.
“And you’re really only having an affair with Alexis?”
“Yeah,” I sigh.
Krys clicks her tongue, just like Jo did a few minutes earlier. “Okay,” she drawls. “Judging from your reaction, you want more.”
I sigh again. “I do, but we agreed that we’d keep it casual. I don’t want to push him away by
telling him I want more out of this arrangement. He’s not the type of guy for a serious relationship. He thinks of himself as – and I quote – a fucked up asshole. There’s times when he avoids me altogether, keeping his distance.”
“Sounds like a strange guy.”
“True dat.”
Krys pours a shot of tequila and sets it down in front of me. “Here’s to the fact that you managed to find the most complicated guy ever to fall in love with.”
I laugh softly, take the shot glass into my hand, and then we clink glasses. When I’ve downed mine, I make a face and shudder. “Oh god, that stuff is nasty when you’re not already primed.”
“Says the queen of empty tequila bottles,” she comments dryly and smirks at me.
“Most of the time, I wasn’t completely sober when I started on the stuff. You know that.” A lame excuse, but she’s right. I probably downed a few gallons of tequila during my four years of college. “What about you? Any new jobs on the line?”
She shakes her head. “Nope. I went to a few auditions, but so far none of them called me back. Small potatoes, but it would be nice if I had something to start out with.”
“Where did you audition?”
She sighs. “A Broadway production, then a TV station that was trying to find a singer for a late-night show, but neither called back to tell me how I did.”
“They’ll call you, I’m sure.”
“I hope so. I’m a little jealous that you were practically discovered here, but on the other hand I’m also happy for you. Your voice is bombastic, and you’re just destined to end up on a major stage.”
“Oh, Krys, no need to envy me. It’s a great experience to be part of a successful band, but I’m only singing in the background. You have to strain your ears to make out my voice. I wasn’t discovered,” I protest, touched by her words.
“But there’s a real chance you’ll be offered a record deal once you’ve blown them all away.”
Alexis: In love with a rockstar (The Hamptons Series Book 2) Page 16