Gabe narrows his gaze. “So she doesn't mean anything to you?”
Even if she did, I’d never let these bitches know. “I just met her. How could she?”
Gabe laughs and puts up his hands to placate me. “Fine. So if I invite her over later, you're going to be okay with that? I mean even with the scars, she’s fucking hot.”
“Hey asshat, what the fuck? Were you standing in the hall?”
“Douche nuts, I was standing in the living room. We were all standing the living room and heard the conversation. I wanted to check her out. I didn’t know she’d be in a fucking towel. She’s kind of tiny. Don’t you usually fuck leggy girls?”
“I’m not fucking Alice Harrison.” It hadn’t been hard to find her name on the list of residents my father kept. His secretary had been free with the information. She’d always had a sweet spot for me and Gabe.
He grins. I flip him off and head for my room. I regret checking on her. Hell, I regret a lot of things, but that’s a lie. I’m fucking happy as hell that I was there to help her out.
“So, you didn’t say, can I invite her over?”
I sigh. They were not going to let this go. “No. I don't want her over here around you assholes.” The thought of Gabe even looking at that little spitfire didn’t sit well in my stomach.
Gabe grins. “Why the fuck not? She's fucking hot. Tiny, but hot. I could tap that if you're not going to.”
Heat runs up my chest and burns my ears. “Stay away...fucking do what you want...I can't stop you...fucking family.” I have this really bad habit of grumbling when emotions knot me up. These guys know it, and that makes me even more pissed.
I feel like a ten-year-old boy as I storm out of the room, but one more minute with these asshats and I'd surely give away another secret about the way I really feel about Alice. She's an enigma to me. I want to know her more. Want to take a chance to see if I can wipe away the scars and make her smile for real. Not that shitty little grin she has when she thinks she's playing me.
No, I want the real thing.
I enter my room and flop down on my stripped bed. The linens are in a box somewhere, but I doubt I'll get to that tonight. My pocket vibrates, and I pull out my cell. I slide my finger across the screen and cringe when my father's angry voice fills my ear.
“Is Gabe there?”
“Yeah, Dad, he's here.” Who knows what kind of trouble my brother is in now. “What did he do?”
My father grumbles beneath his breath.
“Dad, you have to speak up. I can't hear you.”
“The little shit took out his entire trust fund when he turned eighteen and invested it in some damn penny stock. Collin called to let him know that his stock was doing well and asked what he should do, but of course, your brother didn't bother to answer his phone—”
“Wait, Dad. I'm not getting why he's in trouble.” If Collin was handling the money, then that meant that Gabe went to the best in the city to handle his business. Dad had always warned us about protecting our assets, and for once, it looked like Gabe listened.
“Look, Seth, I don't expect you to understand, but he invested his whole damn savings. All of it. There were several million dollars in there by now, and he basically used it to help some small-time company to get off the ground.”
This was definitely news to me. Gabe didn't have a mind for math, but he wasn't stupid.
“Dad. I'm sure he had his reasons.”
A frustrated sigh blew through my ear. “I don't even know why I try with you boys. Just tell your brother to get his ass home.”
I don't really know why he tries either. If it’s called trying. Since our mother left us twelve years ago, my dad had done his best at separating family from everything else. And by that, I mean, he took care of everything else. Gabe and I spent our time with sitters, nannies, and tutors. It was a lonely life for two boys who lost everything when the one thing we had always been able to count on was gone. Family.
“Dad, I'll tell him, but that doesn't mean he's going to come home.”
“Fine. Do what you can. I'll expect to see you Sunday.”
Every Sunday we get together for the pretense of a family meal. It’s a sterile affair with my Dad popping in and out of his cell phone, and the housekeeper clucking her tongue over the food that would get cold on our plates until our father decided we'd been tortured enough. Even so, we went. Every. Single. Sunday.
“I'll talk to him, Dad.”
“See that you do. I swear. I don't know where I went wrong with you boys.” I'm pretty sure it was when Mom left. “You know he gets this wild shit from you.”
I let his anger flow over me. Yeah, I'd take it. He'd been blaming me for everything for years. Maybe he’s right. Maybe it is my fault. I'd take partial blame. But not all of it. No, he'd have to carry his fair share. I'd done my best for Gabe, but there was only so much a big bro was responsible for.
“Dad, the guys are here. I'm going to let you go.”
“Talk to him, Seth. I don't want to see him fuck up the way you are.” “Bye, Dad.”
Even as twisted up as he'd make me, I can't bring myself to disrespect him. The rules and manners my mom had ingrained in me from birth on are the only things I had left of her. I'll be damned if I'll fuck those off.
The phone bounces on the bed, and I lean against the headboard. The door into my room opens. Deacon stalls at the side of the bed, that nerdy grin plastered across his face. “What's eating you?”
I kick him in the thigh with my boot, and he swats my leg. “I don't know. I'm not sure I'm making the right decision.”
“About what?”
“Everything. What if my dad's right, and I'm just fucking up my life?”
Deacon’s brows arch up, and he scrunches up his face. “With the music?”
“Yeah.”
Without warning, he leans over and pinches my nipple. I double over and rub at the sting. Fucking asshole.
“You done feeling sorry for yourself.”
“The fuck was that for?”
“You have a gift, Seth. Something people only dream about. Man you can create a melody out of air, and your words come straight from the heart. I've never heard anything like what you do.”
I know that he’s right, but years of my father’s doubt fill my head. “Yeah, but what if it isn't good enough.”
“If you believe like that, it won't be.”
I glance at my phone and dig my fingers against the ache in my temple. My father always seems to know which buttons to push. “You're right.”
“I know I am.” Deacon claps his hands. “Now, can we please get our shit set up? I'm itching to scratch out that new solo.”
I grin. Deacon has been my best friend since third grade. He'd been there when my mom left and would probably be there when I died. He was always the calm one in our group. The one I could count on to have my back. Evan was cool, but he had his own issues to battle.
“Don't let your dad do this to you.”
“I won't. I'm going to make this happen.”
He pats me on the back and pushes me toward the door. “There you go. Now, let’s nut up and get down to business.”
I still have to find out what Gabe is up to, but for now, I feel better knowing that at least my guys would have my back. And as far as the little spitfire next door, I'd keep a wide berth of her until I sorted out why I was so drawn to her.
O NE OF THE FOUR HOTTIES from yesterday leans against the hall opposite our door. My run hadn’t done enough to beat down the restless nagging crawling through my gut, and the waiting eye candy didn’t help. Opportunity was waving a big red flag for my bull of hormones. I bounce on my feet as I make my way down the hall. The thought of teasing this cutie and sucking up all the power of being on top fills my heart and body with rushing excitement.
The memories of pulling Molly’s limp body out of the ocean are the only things keeping me from following through with my desire to make this big boy squirm. I snag m
y key from around my neck and ready it for a quick entry into our apartment. If I stop for even a second, the adventure will grab hold, and I’ll be under its power until the game ends.
He clears his throat. It’s enough to snag my interest again.
I twist around. “Can I help you?”
He grins, and the smile is familiar. “Yeah, we want to know if you’d like to come watch the practice.”
“We?” Yeah, I’ll just bet they wanted a disaster in there watching them perform. “Did Seth send you over?”
“Actually, no. I think his words were ‘leave her alone’ and maybe something like ‘you’ll become my puppet when I drive my stick up your ass.’” He chuckles. “It’s a good thing I know he loves me and is totally straight.” Hottie straightens and holds out his hand. “I’m Gabe, Seth’s younger brother, and definitely the better looking.”
I laugh. I like this younger version of the James’ household even if his brother has me all tangled up inside. Gabe has a youthful honesty about him, which conflicts with the bad-boy image I think he wants to portray. More importantly, I’m intrigued that I’d bothered Seth enough to make him issue a warning against me. I’d thought we were getting along in a weird kind of way.
“So, he didn’t want me over. Why do you want me over?”
“Because he doesn’t, yet, I found him checking the hall several times after that incident with you and your father.” Gabe shrugs and the muscles in his upper chest bounce under his shirt. “Sorry, he left the door open, and we heard most of it.”
Great. Nothing like having an audience for my fucked-up family drama. “Maybe we should post a webcam, and you guys could just streamline the feed. Titled: The Drowning of Alice Harrison.
He snorts. “It would only get hits if you promised to drop the towel.”
“Now, how the hell would you know I was only wearing a towel?”
He scratches at the buzzed brown hairs on his head. His elbow blocks most of his face, but I can still see a hint of a blush spread across the smooth skin on his cheeks. “Uh…well, Seth rants.” He shrugs again, and I giggle. For all his confidence, there’s a sweetness to him. Nope, there would be no messing with this big guy. “And, I kind of peeked.”
“Like what you saw?”
His eyes light up, and he grins. Damn, these boys have A-grade genes.
“Listen. I appreciate the invitation, but I don’t want your brother to hate me, and I’ve had a fucking shit afternoon.”
It was the truth. I’d taken a run only to find one of my dad’s lackeys sitting in the park I go to every day. The guy didn't do anything but watch me. Still, I know that my dad is up to something, and I can’t get the hinky feeling out of my head that he won’t stop until he gets whatever it is he wants.
Gabe leans forward and whispers in a conspirator’s way. “Music is the best remedy.” He leans back and opens his arms wide. “Come watch. If you hate us, then you can leave immediately. And Seth likes you. He won’t admit it, but I know. Wouldn’t have been so dead set on not having you over if he didn’t care.”
I teeter between indecision and curiosity. Seth and I have a connection, or more aptly, a chemistry, but he didn’t want my trouble or the problems that my past can bring. He may smile like he knows a secret, but seriously, he only thought he did. No one knows the kind of secrets I can keep.
“Ah, I see that you want to. Come on.” Gabe reaches forward, grabs my hand, and tugs me away from my door and toward the middle of the hall. He is bigger than Seth, both wider and taller, but he lacks the hardness of his brother. “Just five minutes.”
The temptation is too much for the bad girl down deep, and I give in. He staggers when I don’t pull tight anymore, and we both laugh.
“Okay, but if your brother snarls at me, gives me the stink eye, or laughs at me, I’m out of there.”
We cross into their living room, which is now plastered with framed posters of bands, some I know, others I’ve never heard of. It looks like a wealthy shrine to music. I’m still dressed in running shoes, short sweat pants and a hoodie. Not my best.
He pulls me along, leading me down a hall where the first few echoes of a drumbeat softly pound.
“How do you keep it so quiet?”
“Seth paid a lot of money to make sure we don’t disturb the neighbors.” He glances back and winks. “Although now I wish he hadn’t.”
“And why is that?”
One dark brow arches above his light-blue eyes. “Because I’d definitely like to disturb you.”
I squeeze the hand wrapped around mine. “Wow. Really? You work quick.”
“Yeah, I have to charm you before big bro has a chance to steal you away.” In a quick move, he spins me around and has me up against the wall. He props one arm beside my ear and leans in, not touching. “How am I doing?”
“Well, up until that cheesy stalker move, I liked you. Now, not so much.”
He backs away. “Shit. I didn’t mean to scare you.”
His worried expression and puppy-dog eyes make me feel like I’d just scolded a twoyear-old.
I smack his chest. “You didn’t. Not really. However, I’d work on my moves if I were you.”
No he hadn’t scared me, but his brother would have set my teeth to chattering if he’d done the same thing. This James brother is definitely the least of my worries.
We enter their private studio with the steady rhythm of a snare, a soft guitar ballad strumming, and a synthesized keyboard adding a string quartet.
I gasp. “You got it all.”
Gabe leans low to hear me and nods. “Yep, state of the art.” He leads me to a small lounging couch and pushes me down. “Sit.”
I salute him and wink. “Yes, sir.”
He smirks. “I like that, Alice. I’ll have you calling me sir for a different reason soon.”
We both roll our eyes at his lame comment, and he winks at me. I have a feeling that Gabe and I could be great friends. I’d cherish his friendship. It’s not often that you meet someone so genuine.
Seth glances up from his spot behind the snare drum. He catches his stick on a down stroke and slams it on a cymbal. I’m pretty sure that wasn’t a part of the song. Everyone freezes. Except for Gabe. He slides onto the bench behind the grand piano and begins playing a lively tune that reminds me of a bawdy house from the eighteen hundreds. Or what I imagined they’d play. He is really good. Really good.
Seth glowers at his brother. “What the hell is she doing here?”
Gabe grins, but doesn’t stop playing.
Seth jumps up, rounds the piano, and begins closing the lid on Gabe’s fingers.
He manages to snatch them back just in time. “Whoa. Man, what the fuck?”
“I told you no.”
“Since when did you become my nanny? She’s here. Get over it.”
The other two guys in the room become engrossed in tuning their instruments and straightening cords draping the floor.
I stand up and hurry to the door. “Listen, I didn’t mean to cause trouble—”
Seth pivots in my direction, and his eyes slant into steel lasers of blue hostility. I’m not sure what has changed since the last time we spoke, but I’m not going to put up with his attitude. I can get that from any one of my family members.
I glance at Gabe and shrug. “Told you. I’m out of here.”
He stands and crosses to my side. “Now hold on. Seth, calm down. There’s nothing wrong with letting her stay for practice.”
Seth flexes his finely toned biceps and crosses back to his stool. “Fine. Whatever. My own fucking house…don’t know why…fucking brothers.”
Wow, he really does rant and stutter like a petulant boy. I must be getting under his skin. The old Alice likes that I am. The new one knows she’s slipping on her promises.
Gabe wraps his hands around my shoulders and pushes me back to the couch. “Stay,” he mouths.
I nod. But turn my attention solely on him. I will not look at Seth James.
Will not. Even if my eyes already fight my mind and seek him out. He taps the sticks together and counts out a beat. Then everything comes into focus as they begin the melody to the song.
Who are these guys? The music is brilliant. Rich, vibrant, sad, and soul deep all at the same time. By the time they finish the first ballad, I’m lost. So freaking lost in memories and regret, I don’t even watch them anymore. I shift on the couch, toeing my runners off, and curl my feet beneath me. One song bleeds into another. Some more lively, but most have a tone to them. Dark, black, lost like me.
A hand wraps around my ankle and tugs. I grip the sheets, but have no chance to keep from slipping from the bed. I hit the carpeted floor with a thump. All the air is gone, and I gasp like a baby bird waiting for food.
“Get up, Alice.” An expensive loafer lands against my ribs, and I wheeze through the pain. My teddy bear lays on the floor a few feet away, and I reach for it. He picks up Mr. Tomlin and tosses him to the bed. A hand threads through my tangled curls, and I’m lifted by the roots. “Get up.”
“What’s wrong…Daddy? What did I do?”
He doesn’t answer, and I’m dragged down the long hall, down the flight of stairs leading to the first floor, and then thrown down the basement stairs. I tumble over a few before I catch a hold of the metal railing. Tears leak across my face.
The shiny loafer’s dull in the dark as he takes the first step. I scramble to my feet and hurry to the basement floor. But I’m trapped. At the bottom, I’m in complete darkness. “Daddy, I’m scared.”
“Good.”
I’ VE MISSED SEVERAL OF MYintros because I can’t take my eyes off the girl sleeping on the couch. She nodded off during the second set. With all the fire and spark calmed beneath her peaceful slumber, I’m drawn to the pain left upon her face. I’ve never seen anyone sleep sad before, and it intrigues me. There’s a lure to this girl who has taken hold, and I can’t tell if it’s my dick or something else that doesn’t want to let her go.
Honestly, I didn’t want to be an ass to her, but I also didn’t want her here in my haven. This is where I create my first love, and I won’t be able to do that if she taints it up with all her cuteness. I kind of have a hang up about having girls I want to screw in my work area.
Drowning (Tears of Sin Series) Page 5