“Doesn’t matter. She knew. Alice’s voice is distinct. Like warm honey over whiskey.”
He’s right, and I shudder. I remember the wails. The screams. I knew who it was before I had even made it into Molly’s bedroom. With Molly’s sensitive hearing, how could she have not picked out those tones? That voice breaking in pain. I drop my head to the bar. “I fucked up. So fucking bad.”
I order three shots of whiskey and down them all in succession. The blonde leans against the bar. “Slow down, sugar, you’re going to be crawlin’ out of here.”
I growl at her. “Keep ‘em coming.”
She glances at Deacon, and he nods. “I got him.”
Burn after burn turns into a fucking good buzz. Deacon helps me off the stool and hauls my sorry ass to the car. We’re driving down dark highways, but not toward the apartment. It isn’t until the trees drape the highway that I come out of my whiskey coma to realize he’s taking me home.
“Nah, man.” I rub some of the redness from my eyes. “My dad is going to shit.”
“Shut up. You need to deal with this, and Alice will be too much of a temptation.” Deacon doesn’t turn toward me. I think if he does, he’ll cave. He’s not the greatest at holding strong to his decisions.
She’s right next door. I can lean across the hall and touch her place. I need to touch her. I need to be close to her, even if she doesn't let me in. “I want to go to the condo.”
“No.”
“Deacon.” I’ve never wanted to punch him in anger, but he’s getting really close to taking five across the chin.
“No. You’re drunk. She’s hurting because of you. You’ll only make it worse.”
After the fifth shot, I spilled all the nasty words we’d said. How I’d basically given Molly the okay to know about her dad and not share it. Saying it now, I can see where I totally screwed up. What the fuck was I thinking? I’m not much better than the filth of her family.
Deacon throws an arm around my neck and guides me to the front door. I still have a key somewhere on my ring, but I’m fumbling through it. The door opens, and the front porch light illuminates my dad’s face.
“Hey, Dad.” There are three of him, and they are swaying in the wind.
“Son.” He reaches out to me and helps hold me up as I stagger into the house. “Deacon, thanks for bringing him here.”
We settle in the den, and Deacon throws himself in one of the recliners while my dad makes himself a drink. “I wasn’t prepared for company, or I’d have had the cook make us a light dinner.”
“I’ll have one of those.” I nod at his glass.
“You’ve had enough.” Deacon and Dad shout in unison.
I’m not sure when I’ll be a man in my dad’s presence. “But I don’t want food.”
My dad takes a long shot of the bourbon. “You’ll have to get shitfaced somewhere else. Gabe has already been here, and you and I need to talk.”
Fuck. “Oh, yeah?”
“Yes. I taught you better than that, Seth.” He grips his belt and squares his shoulders. “Why would you ever make that poor woman think that she didn’t deserve the right to have someone take her side?”
I stand up—swaying. “That’s not exactly how it was.”
The room is spinning.
“Then how was it?” Dad brushes a hand through his normally styled hair, ruffling the dark strands into disarray.
“Molly didn’t know.” If I keep telling myself that, the lie might be easier to swallow.
“They’re sisters, Seth. She knew. Just like I knew your mother wasn’t right. Just like I knew that you were carrying the burden of raising Gabe.” My dad sloshes back the rest of his drink. “We all know. It’s what we do with that knowledge that matters.”
He’s right, and I fucked up. I jump up out of the chair and rush to the front door. Deacon’s right on my heels. He slams the driver’s door shut before I can hop in. “If we’re going somewhere, dude, I’m driving.”
“Fine, but you better haul ass!”
My dad waves from the front porch. “I’m so pissed. Gabe coming over here ratting me out. Dad always knowing what to say to get me in the right direction.” I glance at Deac’s face, glowing from the lit dials on the dash. “Most of all, I’m pissed at me. How could I be so fucking stupid?”
“That’s why we came here. You’ve always listened to him. I knew he’d make you see shit right.”
It’s after midnight, and there’s not a cloud in the sky. The road leading away from my house is black on black night. But the headlights coming toward the car worry me. We don’t normally get visitors out here, and I doubt Gabe would be coming back home this early.
“Seth?”
“Just slow down and let them pass.” It’ll be a tight squeeze down the narrow, onelane road.
Deacon lets off the accelerator and pulls the car as close to the shoulder as he can without spilling us over the short ditch. The car centers in the road and stays right in line with us. “Dude.”
Deacon stops and throws the car in reverse. The car in front of us speeds up and does a rammer on our front end. If we hadn't already been reversed, it would have been bad. I grab onto the oh-shit handle and brace against Deacon’s seat back. “Fuck.”
There's a second car following the first. The bright headlights in our face grow bigger as the car takes another go at us, but this time clips the front corner and sends Deacon's car into a spin. We fishtail backward and slam into one of the large oaks lining the road. Deacon is still and I'm stunned.
“Deac. Deacon.” He doesn't move. I scramble out of my seatbelt and unlatch his. He leans toward me and moans. Thank fuck. “Deacon, wake up.” We need to get out of here before whoever is after us makes it to the car. Deacon isn't moving very fast and his pupils are dilated. Concussion. “Man, we have to go.”
“What the fuck happened?” He holds his head. “Fucking feels like I shoved a tree through my temple.” Blood is seeping from an open cut over his brow.
“We got to go.” My door is yanked open, and a dude that's huge and packing reaches inside and grabs my shirt. He drags me out of the car and throws me to the ground. I’m not a small guy, but he’s manhandling me like I’m Tiny Tim.
The other guy leans against the car with a pistol pulled. “Sorry you had to be here.”
Two shots are fired, and the blasts from the gun spark through the car. “No!” I roll to my knees and take a foot to the chin.
I shake my head, clearing the ringing from my ears. I can’t go down.
“Deacon!” I'm scrambling across the ground with blood hanging from my busted lip. Another foot meets my ribs, and I black out for a moment before remembering to roll up on myself to protect my sore ribs. The kick comes again, but this time I'm ready, and I grab the guy's foot and yank.
He falls on his ass, but recovers and aims his gun at me. “Don't fucking move, kid.”
Deacon is dead. I'm about to die. I can't die. Who will protect Alice? She's all alone because of me. Broken and sad behind that tough little shell she puts on. I raise my hands over my head and lock my grip behind my neck. “I'll do whatever you want. Just please, call him an ambulance.”
“The boss wants you to suffer. He's dead. You'll suffer.” They grab my arms and handcuff them behind my back, then lift me by my thumbs until the pressure brings me to my feet. I scramble behind one of them with the other leading me and am thrown into the back of their car. My shoulders are aching from the tight cuffs, but my heart is mourning the loss of my friend. There's never not been a time when Deacon wasn't there for me. And this time, I got him killed.
We back up and they turn in the road, heading back to the freeway. We drive over an hour and meet another secluded dirt road. We wind down the trail, and my eyes are heavy from the emotions of losing my best friend. I still can't believe he's dead. And I’m probably only a few hours from falling beside him.
The car stops, and E. Harrison strolls out of the cabin. He's wearing a crisp white s
hirt with stupid fucking cuff links at his wrist. The two in the front seat get out and open the back door.
I'm hauled to my feet, and Harrison steps forward. “I told you to stay away from her.” I don't respond. “Your friend would be alive, if you had just listened.” He's right, and we both know it. “So now we have a problem.”
I’m past caring about anything beyond seeing Alice one more time. I sneer at him. “What's that?”
“I still don't have my movies, you didn't stay away, and now there's a body to dispose of.”
He glances to the guy on my left, and the dick with the gun takes off. The other dude pushes me forward, and I follow Harrison. I'm pretty sure he's about to do some really crappy shit to me, but if Alice can endure it, then I can too. This is for her. I can't do anything to help Deacon, but I'll do anything for her.
“This doesn't get your movies back.”
“No, you're right. But I find that all of this frustration has taken its toll. I need a stress reliever. And since that ungrateful bastard I sired won't take it like she's supposed to, I'll make do with you.”
My knuckles crack under the pressure in my fisted hands. “You stay the fuck away from her.”
“Or what?”
“I mean it, Harrison. Alice is innocent and doesn't deserve all of this.” He laughs. I wish my hands weren't cuffed so I could squeeze the life from his throat.
“I know that she is. Or was. Until you. I have her followed regularly. I'm not sure why she gave it up to you, but that really only sealed her worth to me.” He picks up a set of pliers from the table by the cot in the middle of the room. “I loved her mother. Did she tell you that?”
I don't answer.
“Best fucking lay I ever had. She screamed every time I pushed inside her.” He's lost in his thoughts, and I get a glimpse of the real sickness behind his eyes. “She wanted to abort Alice. Wanted to cut her out of her stomach. I tried to help her with that, but the bitch almost died on me. Had to get her to a hospital. But that was a long time ago, when I was weak and still couldn't stand the thought of losing my Lolita.”
He puts the pliers down and squeezes a pair of brass knuckles over his fingers. “We're not going to play like I do with my girls. No, you and I are going to go like men.”
“Then untie me and face me like a real man. Or what? Only helpless children make you feel manly.”
I'm shoved into a wooden chair. My hands and ankles are strapped to the legs. The first punch hits me in the temple, and everything is woozy after that.
“You. Will. Find. My. Films.” He’s pounding into my face and upper body, adding bruise after aching bruise. My breathing is labored. It won’t be long, and I’ll pass out. Hopefully.
I’ M EIGHT MINUTES FROM BOARDINGthe train that will take me north. I don’t really have a destination in mind. I have fifteen dollars left to my name, but I’m smart. I’ll find a job and forget about this place. They call my boarding section, and I make my way toward the gate when my phone rings. It’s an unknown number.
“Alice?”
“Yes. I’m sorry, who is this?”
“It’s Evan. You have to come to Seton Medical Center now.”
“What? What happened?” A sense of doom slides over me, and I know. “Is Seth okay?”
“No. He’s not. And we may lose Deacon. You have to get down here. Seth is going crazy calling for you.”
I hurry back to the window and try to get some of my money back. I’ll need it for the cab ride downtown. The trip is a twenty-minute commute, but it feels like hours. If Seth dies, I’ll die. I wanted to prove a point to him before, but now it all feels so stupid.
I sprint to the emergency room and run full force into Seth’s father. “Mr. James. I’m so sorry. What happened?”
He braces my shoulders and pushes me away from his chest, snapping his concerned gaze down at me. “Someone shot Deacon and beat the hell out of Seth. They were dropped off in the parking lot and left. We have no idea what happened.” He rakes a hand through his hair. “They’re trying to sedate Seth, but he’s fighting them. Please go talk to him, sweetie. I know you two are having problems.” A tear slides down his cheek. “But, please go make my boy calm down so he’ll get better.”
I hurry through the curtain and gasp when I see him. I take in a breath, using everything yoga has taught me to keep from screaming. There’s not a place on him that’s not swollen. His face is disgustingly puffy and bloody. He can’t see me because his eyes are matted closed. I hurry to his side and take his hand. “Seth.”
“Alice?” I can barely make out my name from his busted lips.
“I’m here.” I bend down, hesitant to touch his face or chest. I grip the only thing I can find not damaged—his arm. “What happened?”
He coughs, and the sound hurts me as much as him. “Harrison.” His fingers wrap around my forearm and squeeze. “Don’t leave. Stay with my dad…he’ll…keep you safe.”
“Seth. Don’t worry about me.” I run my fingers up and down his forearm, hoping to soothe him.
“He’s fucking crazy. Killed Deacon.” He lurches up. “Don’t want to lose you. So sorry.” He’s so upset, and I don’t know how to settle him down. “Need to tell you—”
“No. No confessions until you’re well. Deacon isn’t dead. I’m going to go try to find out what happened to him.” Seth’s fingers tighten around my arm. “Let me go. I’ll be back. I’m going to tell the nurse to bring you something for the pain, and you aren’t going to argue. It’ll help you heal. I need you well.”
His face follows the sound of my voice, and he’s relaxed now that he knows Deacon has a chance. “Okay.”
I kiss his hands and slide from his grip. “I’ll be back.”
If I’d never smacked into him on that elevator, he’d be at home right now, beating on his drums and creating magic with his words. I’m a fucking plague.
The nurse slips past me and adjusts his IV. I watch from the door until I see his body relax with the drug. She smiles at me and pats me on the shoulder. “He’ll be okay. He’s a strong boy. Healthy. That face may sport a scar or two, but it’ll just make him sexy.”
He's already sexy. I hold back the tears. This is my fault. I should have just taken the movies to my dad and been done with it. But, I wanted him to pay. I’d planned on getting out of the city and taking them to a news station. Revenge had driven me. Revenge at them all.
Mr. James stands when I hit the waiting room. “He’s better. They sedated him and he’s resting.”
“Thank God. I didn’t know how I would keep him in that bed.” He grabs my hands and holds them to his chest. “Seriously, Alice. Thank you. I know what he did—about the whole Molly ordeal. I’m not proud of that, but I think he meant for it to come across a different way.”
I touch his cheek and smile. “My dad did this to him. When everything comes out, it’s going to show that you’re tied to his real estate. I’m afraid it might hurt your career.”
“I don’t give a shit about having some dirty politician backing my name.” In his anger, I see pieces of Seth breaking through. Man, these men are magnificent. “I’ve been so blind. I almost lost my boy.”
Gabe hurries through the waiting room door and takes us both into a big hug. “Is he—”
“He’s okay. They’ve given him something for the pain, and he won’t need surgery. Deacon is still in surgery. I’ve called his parents.” I sag against Mr. James, and he helps me to a chair. “It’s not your fault, Alice. Don’t you go blaming yourself about this.”
The fact that he even needs to say that makes me feel like it's even more my fault. Gabe sits down beside me and draws me into the crook of his arm. “Don’t.”
My tears slide quietly down my face, and he holds me until I relax in his arms. This is my family. These James’ men. And I’ve hurt them all. “Don’t you see? Gabe, I destroy everything.”
“No. You can’t help that you have a psychotic sadistic freak for a dad.” He pets through
my curls while Mr. James and Evan go check on Deacon. “You gave us our Dad back. Seth has never been more honest about his feelings than he is now. And when we get through all of this, you’re going to help us make his dreams come true. You’re our lead, baby. Where you go, we all follow. You’ve won our hearts and our loyalty.”
I sob at his words, and he draws me into his lap. There is nothing sexual about it. He’s my brother. I’m his sister, and we love with a love that has no reason.
Gabe has talked me into coming to their home for the night and I’m settled in Seth’s old bedroom. Seth is in ICU, so they won’t let me stay. I’ll go back for the nine visiting hour. I’m in one of Seth’s big T-shirts, and it smells of him. I sit down at his desk and begin to write.
Walked into my life.
Tore up my dreams with your smile. Knocked down my walls with your heart. And now I’ll follow you over every mile.
Take me back to a place that was good. Where the water laps along the rising shore. And the grass tickles over frantic hands. Guess what. I’m not drowning anymore. Hard. Rising heat. Down the path.
Fallen. Broken. Sinking.
The children lost, and the woman is found. Don’t know what you were thinking. Need you now more than ever.
Need you to find the will.
Need you to find the strength.
With this last call, I’ll stamp my heart and bind the seal. Come back to me. Come back to me. My love, come back to me.
Gabe finds me hunched over the desk, tears seeping. He lifts me in his arms and carries me to the bed. I’m not this weak girl, but I can’t seem to find my feet.
He crawls into the bed behind me and cradles me to him. “Shhh…I knew I’d get you here someday.”
I smack his shoulder behind me, and he chuckles. It makes me laugh and relax. “Gabe, I’m sorry about Molly. I don’t think she meant to hurt me.”
“I know she didn’t.” His fingers flex against my waist. “But that doesn’t make what she did right.”
I sit up and turn on the lamp beside the bed. “Have you ever done anything wrong, even when you knew it was?”
Drowning (Tears of Sin Series) Page 24