“Nope. I won’t look good in it. You will.” I laugh, and she shushes me again. “What is so funny? I picked this dress out specifically for you. I thought you might wanna look nice for Ryder, or Reese. Apparently it’s Ryder.”
I feel myself begin to blush, and I look away so she hopefully won’t notice. “Tobe–”
“Don’t even deny it,” she says, looking at me. “I’m hung-over, not stupid. Plus, I heard your little drama with Reese last night when I snuck out to use the bathroom. You and Ryder almost had a moment, and Reese ruined it. Now, you probably can’t recreate such a romantic moment as last night, but you can certainly look your best.”
“A sundress, as pretty as it is, is simply not practical anymore.”
“It’s a dress. It’s not practical, it’s beautiful. Its only purpose is to make you feel your best, and to make you happy. Plus, I think blue is definitely your color, and I’m sure Ryder will love it.”
“I think you’re wrong. I think he’s gonna think I’m stupid for wearing a dress to breakfast. He’ll probably just laugh at me or tell me I’m being immature or useless.”
“If he does, I’ll scratch his face off. Just put the dress on, and if you change your mind, you can always take it off and wear your nasty jeans that haven’t been washed. But I think you’re gonna feel better in this dress.”
I sigh, and take the dress from her. She turns around and gets dressed for the day while I slip on the dress. It fits almost perfectly, and it hangs down to my knees. I don’t feel particularly pretty or anything, but for some reason, it does actually make me feel better. I wonder if Ryder will disapprove…
Tobe throws a pair of flimsy sandals at me, and I sigh again. I hate dressing up, and it seems like a waste of time to me, but after last night I do want to try and get Ryder’s attention. This is probably the easiest way to do it, not to mention the safest.
I brush out my hair, adjust the dress a little, and follow Tobe out into the dining room. Ryder is sitting at the dining room table with a bowl of something that looks like blueberry oatmeal, and he looks up. His spoon halts halfway to his mouth, and I suddenly feel very foolish and insecure. What if he doesn’t like it?
Reese stops in the kitchen entryway and looks me over. He smiles. “Well, you two look nice.”
Tobe giggles, and takes a seat across from Ryder, leaving the place on his left empty and meant for me. I haven’t even taken two steps when Ryder’s voice stops me. “I think it looks stupid.”
“Ryder!” Tobe snaps, casting a quick, worried glance at me.
I look down at the floor, shifting uncomfortably. I want to turn around, run away, and lock myself in my room and burst into tears, but I can’t move. I need to know why he thinks what he does.
“Well, it does. This is the zombie apocalypse, not fashion week or some stupid shit. What happens if we were attacked right now? How would she escape wearing those sandals? How would she survive out in the cold or the rain with her legs and arms bare like that?” He looks at me. “I thought you were smarter than that.”
That one final sentence is what finally breaks the hold over me, and I turn around without a word, and shut myself in the room I share with Tobe. I lock the slam the door shut, lock it, and then rip off the dress and sandals. When I’m standing in nothing but my underwear, I throw the dress and shoes hard enough for the shoes to make a dent in the wall.
I’m crying, and I don’t fully understand why. All he did was criticize my chose of clothing, and instead I feel like he broke my heart, then spit on the pieces and ground them into the dirt with the hell of his boot. I don’t understand! How can one little statement make me feel so terrible?
There’s a knock at the door, and I wipe my cheeks with my hand. “Go away!”
“Sam?” Tobe asks cautiously. “Is it alright if I come in?” She tries to open the door, and I can hear her sight impatiently. “Sam, unlock the door, please. You can’t sit in our room all day sulking, trust me. I did it all day yesterday, and it sucked.”
“Just leave me alone!” I snap, unsure why I’m even angry at her. Then I know. “It was your stupid idea to wear the dress. I told you he would think it was stupid. I shouldn’t have listened to you. I should have been smart enough to realize that Ryder doesn’t want anything to do with me.”
“That’s not true; he doesn’t want you, he just feels bad about it. Give it some time. You guys can still get to know one another a little before taking that leap. He just needs time to think of you as something other than a girl he’s protecting.”
I don’t answer her. Even though I know she’s trying to cheer me up, I can’t bring myself to stop crying. I’ve never felt this sorry for myself, ever, in my entire life, and all Ryder had to do to break my self-esteem was tell me that he thought I was smarter than that. One simple thought expressed, and I fall apart like a spoiled child.
I’m stronger than this…right?
I wish I was, but I don’t think I am. Ryder was able to shake my entire confidence with just one sentence; that doesn’t make me seem very strong. It makes me feel like a stupid child pretending to be an adult.
“Sam, please come out. Reese found two fishing poles in the garage and is going fishing in a few minutes, and one of us needs to go with him. I hate fishing. The worms, the smell of the fish, the hot sun…it’s all terrible. Please, I don’t wanna have to be the one to go. Get out of here and get some fresh air. Who knows, it might help.”
I sigh. “Alright, tell Reese I’ll be right there.”
I hear her walk away, and steal another moment to mope, before getting dressed in jeans, sneakers, and a t-shirt. I leave the bedroom without one glance at the dress that’s lying crumpled up against the wall, and I push past Ryder without a word.
Reese is outside waiting for me with a fishing pole in both hands. He hands the smaller one to me, and I cringe. It’s bright red and obviously meant for a child. Just what I need right now…another reminder that a little boy used to live here and doesn’t anymore.
Reese shakes a light blue container with air holes at me and smiles. “I found this with the fishing gear. It had a bunch of dead, dried up worms in it, but I dumped it out and dug up some fresher ones by the lakeside. And I found the perfect place to fish from.”
I follow him without a word, and I think he realizes that I’m not feeling up to conversation just yet, because he doesn’t complain. He just leads me to a shaded, sheltered spot that’s about a two and a half minutes walk from the house, and he sets his rifle in the grass, and takes a seat next to it.
I down beside him and Reese teaches me how to put a worm on the hook. It looks barbaric and painful for the worm, and he laughs. “It’s a worm, Sam. I’m sure it doesn’t have feelings.”
I follow Reese’s every movement, and soon enough my hook is in the water, and the two of us are waiting patiently for a bite. I’m not sure if there are going to be any fish big enough to eat this close to the shore, but I don’t want to find a boat to take out onto the water, not after what came after me last time I was out here.
“Try not to let him get to you.”
I glance over at him. “He’s not getting to me.”
Reese snorts. “Sam, just because you like Ryder more than you like me doesn’t mean I don’t want to be your friend now. You can talk to me if you want. I’ve been living with Ryder for years; I know how rude and standoffish he can be sometimes. After a while, you’ll realize it’s just his way of dealing with emotions he doesn’t understand.”
“What are you saying?”
“I think he feels the same way about you, he just either doesn’t know what to do about his feelings, or he’s worried about…well, hurting me. He saw the way we flirted back and forth at your apartment, and I’m sure he thinks that means I have a claim to you.” I snort, and he smiles. “I know that sounds stupid, but guys are that way sometimes.”
“Well, it doesn’t make sense.”
“Sure it does. Look at this from his point of
view. He sees it as his responsibility to keep all of us, including you, alive. He constantly worries that he’s gonna screw up and get one of us killed, and I think when you came out in that dress earlier, he got a bit freaked out.”
“Why?”
“Since we met you, you’ve shown that you’re level-headed and intelligent enough to survive on your own. When you came out in that dress, he didn’t see that girl anymore. He saw someone like Tobe, someone that needs constant protection and supervision. That makes you harder to keep safe; it makes you easier to lose.”
“That’s stupid,” I say, looking away. “I can still take care of myself if I’m wearing a dress.”
“Hmm, I don’t think Ryder thought about that. But I think you should talk to him when we get back, and sort everything out.” Neither of us says anything for a few minutes. We just sit and watch our lines in the water, but I can tell that he wants to ask me something.
“Reese?”
“Why do you like him more than me? I’m just curious.”
I sigh. “Reese–”
“Sam, you and I can still be friends. I wouldn’t have it any other way, but I’m just curious. Normally girls don’t go for Ryder over me. I just wanna know why you did.”
“I’m not sure why I feel the way I do about Ryder. He’s kind of rude, he gets angry in a heartbeat, he likes to mock people, and he’s impatient. When he found me at the bottom of that ditch, bleeding and crying, he could have been mean to me, but he wasn’t. He was actually gentle, and he cleaned my cut, and then carried me up the hill, all without making me feel terrible about myself.”
He thinks about what I’ve just told him, and I don’t rush him. “Hmm, is that it? That one moment together?”
“When we ran into those creeps at the SUV, he stepped in front of me to protect me, and he did the same thing when we found that psycho in bed with his zombie wife. He tried to shield me from their bodies. He’s been back and forth with me, but I think he might actually care about me.”
Reese nods. “See? I told you.”
I thought spending time with Reese would be really uncomfortable, but it’s really not. He doesn’t seem to hold my feelings for Ryder against me, and I think we might actually be able to be friends still. When I get a bite, he helps me reel it in, and it doesn’t feel strange, it just feels like one friend helping another.
That doesn’t make me feel any better about hurting him, even if he wasn’t in love with me. I still picked his brother over him.
Reese and I sit in the shade by the lake for a couple of hours, talking and sipping at our water bottles. Reese catches two fish, and I catch one, but it’ll be plenty for the four of us if we open a can of beans with it. With our catches in hand, Reese and I head back up to the house. I walk right by Ryder, and he doesn’t even bother to look at me, which hurts more than what he said earlier.
He won’t even acknowledge me right now. God, why does he have to be such a jerk?
Reese takes me out back and teaches me how to clean and prepare a fish. I’m a little squeamish at first, but I get the hang of it after a bit, and Reese applauds my work. We then hand the fish over to Tobe, who’s started a fire in the front yard. She fries the fish up, and I take some boiled water into the bathroom to wash and shave.
Dinner passes in near total silence. Ryder and I both stare down at our plates, and neither of us speaks once during dinner. Tobe offers to clear away our dishes, and I just take a book and head into the bedroom, because I don’t want to listen to Ryder’s moody silence any longer. When Tobe joins me for bed later, she looks at me, and just shrugs.
I blow out the candle on my bedside table, and the room goes dark.
Chapter Fifteen
In the morning, I help Tobe cook breakfast, and I try to ignore Ryder when he takes a seat across from me at the dining room table. Sadly, I can’t avoid him forever, and Reese knows that. “Ryder’s going hunting for game today, and I’m going to stay here with Tobe,” Reese says, looking at me. “You’re gonna have to go with him and look after each other.”
I narrow my eyes at Reese. If he’s purposely trying to shove the two of us together, I’m gonna kick his ass later. “Reese–”
“Look, the prepared meals won’t last forever, alright? We should probably be trying to save as many as possible in case we have to leave in a hurry. Ryder’s also going to hide a bag of them on the boat today, just so we don’t have to leave with nothing if we have to leave in a hurry. Sam, I know you two probably don’t wanna spend the day together right now, but you’ll have to suck it up and get his done.”
He’s right, but that doesn’t make me hate him any less right now.
Ryder doesn’t look happy either, and I try not to let that bother me any. He just finishes up his breakfast, takes the empty dishes away, and sets them in the kitchen sink. I can hear him clanking around, probably trying to kill time, before finally returning a few minutes later. “Alright, let’s get this over with.”
I sigh, and head back to my room. The Glock is on the bedside table, and I grab it, before tucking it into the holster Ryder gave me a couple of days ago. Ryder is waiting for me by the door. Instead of his usual rifle, he’s holding the bow, and there’s a quiver of twelve arrows strapped to his back. It’s amazing how dangerous he still manages to look, even without his high powered assault rifle.
“You ready to go?”
I nod, and follow him down the steps. Tobe’s boiling water to clean the dishes with, and she winks at me. “Good luck,” she says under her breath as I pass. I just roll my eyes and quicken my pace to keep up with Ryder. I’m not sure if he’ll consider leaving me behind, but I don’t want to take the chance.
Ryder walks into the trees near the house, and I follow silently after him. I’m not sure how Ryder remembers the path to the boat, but he does, and he leads us there. It takes almost an hour to reach the boat and, when we do, Ryder sets the bag of prepared meals in the back of the boat. “Alright, there’s a hidden dirt path that leads away from here and circles around. If we follow it, we’ll eventually make our way back to the house. It’ll take about two and a half hours to walk the whole thing, and we can hunt for game along the way.”
He doesn’t sound optimistic about our odds of finding game, probably because I’m making so much noise just trying to keep up with him. Every time I step on a branch, or kick over a rock, or rustle a bush, Ryder flinches, and I half expect him to turn around and yell at me. He doesn’t, but I can tell he’s getting angrier and angrier each time I move.
Ryder stops in the middle of the path, and I bump into his back. “Ryder?”
He shushes me, and readies his bow. I have a bad feeling about this, so I take my gun out of its holster and listen to the woods around us. There’s a rustling in the bushes to our left, and a zombie lumbers out. It’s a man, and his throat has been ripped open almost entirely; it’s a miracle his head is still attached to his body.
Ryder’s arrow buries itself in the zombie’s left eye socket with a pop, and the zombie drops to the ground. Another stumbles out from behind a tree, and I take aim, and pull the trigger. I get lucky, and the bullet takes out the back of his head, and the zombie hits the ground with a dull thud. Seven more step onto the path, and Ryder looses another arrow. This one embeds itself in the shoulder of a zombie, and it keeps coming.
I pull the trigger again, and the shot goes wide, lodging in the throat of the one next to him. Ryder looses a third arrow, and it goes in through the zombie’s open mouth, sending the zombie tumbling to the ground. I can’t take the time to watch, because there’s a zombie that’s seen me, and she stretches her arms out wide.
I pull the trigger, and I get lucky. The bullet hits right between her eyes, and she hits the tree behind her before sliding down the trunk. There are three left, but Ryder doesn’t have the time to put another arrow up before they’re on us. Ryder resorts to stabbing with an arrow, and he manages to take out two of them that way.
One latches ont
o my shoulder from behind, and I scream, dropping my gun in the process. Ryder whirls, and runs the arrow right through the zombie’s ear, stabbing all the way into the brain. He tries to pull the arrow free, but it lodges, and that one mistake costs us.
A zombie comes up behind Ryder and rips the quiver of arrows from his back. The bow falls to the ground, and Ryder grabs my hand. He drags me away from the clearing at a run, and we look for a place to hide out. We’re almost two hours from the house, and I’m not sure if anyone heard my scream. We’ll have to assume that we’re on our own, with no weapons.
I can hear the zombie’s groans; they’re not far behind us, and we have nowhere left to run. Ryder stops us at the bottom of a large tree, and cups his hands. “Climb,” he orders simply. I step into his hands, and he boosts me up into the tree. “Hurry!”
The zombies are only a few yards away, and Ryder grabs a branch to haul himself up. One of the remaining zombies grabs a fistful of his jeans, and tries to haul him back to the ground. He grunts and tries to kick him off, and I can only watch helplessly, hoping that Ryder figures something out.
With a gasp, I bend over and untie my sneaker, and throw it at the zombie that’s trying to dig into the muscle of Ryder’s leg. It collides with his nose, and thick, slightly congealed blood begins to seep from it. I’m not sure if he registers the pain or not, but it gives Ryder the second he needs to pull himself free and drag himself up into the tree.
He climbs up to join me at least fifteen feet into the air, and he leans against the tree trunk. He’s sweating and breathing harshly, and I think this is the most shaken I’ve ever seen him. He just takes a moment to catch his breath, before looking down at the base of the tree.
There are four zombies crowding around the trunk of the tree, and they’re all looking up at us, trying to reach us even though their arms thankfully aren’t long enough. Each of them has a hungry, slightly pissed off expression on their faces, and I’m glad we’re well out of their reach.
Zombie Island Page 14