Alice’s immediate reaction was to clasp her mouth with both hands. As Jessica slowly stepped out of the jeep, Ben put the shot glass down. Perhaps for the first time in his adult life, he was unsure how to act. Alice knew how immediately. Her motherly instincts went into high gear. She cried uncontrollably and ran for her daughter. As she reached Jessica, she flung both arms around her and kept crying.
It was a touching moment.
“I am all right, Ma! I am all right! I miss you, Ma,” Jessica said in a stern but soft voice.
“Everything will be all right, everything will be fine, my precious baby,” Alice responded, as she could no longer control her words or actions.
They were both at the center stage. Everyone took a back seat. Ben just observed. He glanced at the back seat of the jeep. Seeing Joshua, Ben’s face and hands tightened. Joshua noticed the threatening stare; he immediately bowed his head.
“Let’s go get you something to eat,” Alice said as she put her arms around Jessica and led her toward the house.
“This calls for a drink. Let’s celebrate,” said the neighborhood drunk, except no one responded. “Damn, it’s like telling a joke at a funeral home.”
He didn’t get why everyone wasn’t happy.
“Welcome home, Jessica,” Ben said in an unassured voice.
“Thanks, dad,” Jessica retorted without even looking at her dad.
Alice just stopped. I guess her instincts were right on. She turned and looked at Officer Ryan.
“Thank you very much for everything you did for us. Bless you,” Alice commented as she wiped away her tears. She then gave him a hand gesture; that he should really get going. She was now the commander and chief. The moment was extremely fragile. There were many open wounds. Alice was not going to allow Joshua and Ben to try to resolve anything at this time.
You could see a crack in Officer Ryan’s professional conduct. Could it be?
Nah! Why, yes! There it was, an actual tear from his eye. He is human after all. He turned around and wiped it with the knuckle of his second digit finger. He then turned again and gave a half-hearted salute with two fingers. Both Alice and Officer Ryan knew that he had to get Joshua out of there.
As Officer Ryan climbed back into the driver’s seat, the occasional drop was now turning into a more steady rain. Ben wanted to take another sip, but couldn’t.
Camille’s Quest
It was a painful night for most of the collaborative. Only Alice seemed joyful for her daughter’s arrival. Her precious daughter was safe and under their roof. Alice bought in a plate of food and a drink for Jessica. They both had lost some serious weight over the ordeal. Stress takes on many different coping mechanisms. Alice and Jessica, for the most part, eliminated many meals. Ben, not an alcoholic, had more drinks than normal. Alice just wanted her daughter back at all cost. Ben was carrying many burdens. He really loved Jessica but felt betrayed. He had a wife and the collaborative that relied on his leadership. But he had no mentor or therapist to turn to. For his whole marriage, he felt like the provider, role model, and protector of his domain. He knew enough to let Alice keep this fragile reunion together. Funny, no family dog, just the neighborhood drunk to commiserate with.
Using her female instincts, Alice just tried to make small talk. Her mind was running feverishly. She had many questions. What was her real relationship with Joshua? What happened on her two journeys? Was she in the midst of some physical or emotional damage? Perhaps as a mother, Alice is not the right person to pry into these sensitive areas. Perhaps her close friend Vivian could reach her. Alice understood well that her sole mission was to make sure that Jessica felt at home and that she knew that she was missed and loved. It was a daunting task. Instinctively, Alice knew that the solution must include Alice’s father, her husband Ben.
Somehow, Alice needed to hear Jessica’s side of the story to begin to help her daughter. Timing is everything. Jessica was worn down physically and emotionally. Her face, hair, even her mannerisms suggest a beaten-down person. Very seldom did Jessica lift her head to look at her mom. Alice was doing everything herself not to break down. She knew she had to be strong. She had to be the monolith that kept the family unit together.
As Alice sat in silence watching her daughter eat, her emotions started to turn to anger. Damn Ben! she thought. All this should have been prevented. His damn alpha-male ego. If he could only see how vulnerable his daughter looked.
Seeking a key, she realized that any parent should know how one offspring is in tune with their siblings. Keeping her cool, she called to Randy who was also outside. He too was overjoyed to see his sister come home safely. Randy is a very sensitive and caring person, caught in the middle of this fray. Being handy as a mechanic, he really had more in common with his dad. But he loved his sister, even though they were five years apart. Perhaps he could bridge the distance between Jessica and her father.
“Hello, Jessica, glad to see you,” Randy commented as he entered the house. “Good to see you, Randy,” Jessica said as she raised her face.
Immediately, Randy saw how much weight Jessica lost. He knew enough not to say anything.
“I’m really happy to see you, sis,” Randy commented as he put his hand on her shoulder. Inside he really wanted to hug her. Even though they were not close, Randy realized his sister was becoming a woman. He knows that the time had arrived for them to have a different relationship. This adventure that his sister went on gave Randy a wake-up call. Randy did not take sides with his father against his sister. In all fairness, Ben never asked nor expected him to take sides. I guess it goes with his alpha-male ego.
“Randy, can you fetch and heat up some water so your sister can wash herself?” Alice asked in a polite manner.
“Sure Mom!” Randy replied as he exited the door.
“Ma, you don’t have—” Jessica commented as Alice interrupted.
“I know, honey! I am just so glad to see you! We all are glad to see you!” Alice replied with a little crackling in her voice.
Jessica looked up and made real eye contact with her mother. She saw a tear and how distraught her mother was.
Normally, she wanted to just hug her mom. It was the cold war, what she had with her dad. Her dad was still the husband of her mother. She knew her place.
This adventure has turned her into a woman. To be with Joshua seemed so natural and nourishing. It is the end game. The EMP strike with all its bad affects had a silver lining. It fast forwarded Jessica into womanhood. She would not interfere in the relationship of her mother and father. Truth is, her appetite to leave the nest was whetted.
Sometimes the good lord has a way of lifting your burdens. She knew detente had to come from her dad. Ben did not allow anyone to try and reason with him. It is weird, though, that the only one who affected Ben was the neighborhood drunk. I guess he doesn’t give a crap. The drunk just told Ben it’s good to see your daughter back. That did affect Ben; the drunk had nothing left.
When he lost his wife, he lost his will to go on. Ben felt his innocent wisdom piercing him. No one else seemed to reach his. His Christian dream was shattered by that playboy Joshua. The drunk actually made Ben get off his horse and take reality in.
Now what? Good question! No real easy answers. Before a battle gets underway, a good officer sends a probing party to assess his opponent. Ben had the good sense to stay out in the rain. He saw his son Randy fetching water for his daughter. Ah crap, he thought, is this going to be a three on one? He was too tired to build himself a dog house to sleep in for the night. Ah, but if he did, maybe his family would have pity on him. Nah! Just his opening intake of the prevailing moment. With the drunk leaving and the rain coming down harder, perhaps all of this is his own doing.
Silence is truly golden. The rain was a real omen. Not just for Jessica, Alice, the collaborative, but also for Ben. Randy walked into the house with the warm water. Ben decided to stay outside for another hour. Usually Alice would yell for Ben to come inside, but
tonight is different. The fire was still burning, but the cold rain and his emotions put a damper on the moment. Ben did come in after an hour. By then everyone was in bed. Ben just took off his wet clothes and put on some dry ones on. He knew enough not to talk to Alice. The air was gloomy for everyone. Before he slept, Ben grabbed the Bible to hold onto. Yes, there was tension in the Randal residence, but the drunk is right. His whole family was safe under one roof. Before he fell asleep, he gave himself a little smile. Still, it was a smile the Lord had blessed him with. Now in the morning, he will collect himself.
Surely this rain will stop.
It was a restless night. Ben felt his grip on the family slipping away. He needed to take a step back. He slept on his side facing away from Alice. He did not want her, to smell what little alcohol he had on his breadth. Outside of a few bathroom runs, the night went uneventful. In the morning, Alice was up early. She was hopeful that her daughter would not escape again. As each one arose, Randy was getting his Buick ready. Today was his run to the armory. The collaborative was getting low on supplies. Randy also wanted to pay a visit to the lady down the street. Her husband was shot by a gang of thugs. It would be nice if she would go for a ride.
Alice, Randy, and the divorce woman next store started to organize a morning breakfast. Randy was getting pretty efficient on building the fire. Besides, Randy really enjoyed being around his neighbor’s daughter. Seems like Mr. Henderson’s son also enjoys her company. Without the social media and the internet around, one’s choices became very limited. It was a strange morning. Ben is usually the first one up, yet there was no sign of him. With little else going on, many of the collaborative members started to show up. It was really eerie. As the members sat down around the fire, one could see smoke in most directions. It was a constant reminder that their collaborative was like an army outpost in hostile territory.
Late morning and the atmosphere seemed to be a mix bag. Everyone was glad that Jessica has returned, yet she had not come out of her bedroom. Even stranger was Ben. He is their rock, their leader. Still in bed by mid-morning, it seemed like two combatants who had yet to enter the arena. Finally, Jessica opened the front door. She had on her jeans, sneakers, and a loose sweater. Even with a baggy sweater, everyone noticed she definitely lost weight. With her drawn face, unkempt hair, she looked like a beaten puppy.
“Morning, honey! Isn’t it a beautiful morning?” Alice commented with a glee in her voice.
“Good to see you, sis,” Randy said, trying to support his mother.
“Happy to see you,” the drunk said with a big smile.
Seems like the alcohol had brought out his uninhibited self. Perhaps it was the right medicine that was needed?
“Coffee and eggs this morning, dear?” Alice asked in an upbeat tone.
“That will be great, Ma,” Jessica said as she looked like a condemned prisoner.
Many of the other members were afraid to speak. It seemed to be like one’s first dance. What if I am shot down? Wouldn’t I look like a fool?
After several minutes, Alice bought the eggs, coffee, and a piece of toast to Jessica. She thanked her mom and started to take small bites. As she sipped her coffee, Jessica noticed everyone looking at her. She immediately put her head down as if in shame. Alice, being very much in tune with her daughter’s feelings, decided to talk to the divorcee. Soon even Randy started to talk to Mr. Henderson’s son. It was an attempt to make Jessica feel less conspicuous.
The plan seemed to be working, except now Ben came out of the house. It was unlike him not to shave before making his entrance. Alice was still making conversations with her friend when she noticed Ben’s appearance. Almost always, Alice would comment if she felt Ben, Randy, or Jessica’s dress code was awry. Today was a mulligan however. Alice did not want to upset the delicate detente that existed. At this moment in Alice’s life, her daughter’s fragile state of mind was front and center.
“Morning everyone,” Ben stated as he went to the fire pit for coffee.
Crack! Crack! Crack! was the greeting sound of a 9mm gun that went off in the distance. “Looks like there’s a new fire to the south of us,” Ben said as to redirect any more unsettling anguish.
“I think there is a new gang to the south of us,” Mr. Henderson said. “I sure will be glad when Officer Ryan comes back. He should be able to give us an update.”
“So, Jessica, I heard you went to Tent City,” the drunk said as he walked over to Jessica. He had his shot glass and took a sip before sitting down near her.
“Yes! I thought . . . yes, I did,” Jessica said as to catch herself. She wanted to mention to the drunk that it wasn’t noon yet, and he is already drinking. Yet Jessica no longer felt worthy to make such comments.
“We all really missed you—I missed you,” the drunk said with a tear in his eye. With the shot glass in his right hand, he wiped the tear away without spilling a drop. Ah! Practice makes perfect.
Jessica raised her bowed head as if the governor was giving her a reprieve.
“I missed you too. I missed all of you,” Jessica said in a stoic tone.
Alice was trying very hard not to break down. This EMP strike has affected everyone’s life. It was like a master test that all human life on the East Coast was going under.
“Thank God for the drunk,” Alice mumbled quietly.
“It will all work out. Wounds take time to heal,” the divorced woman said to Alice as she put her hand on Alice’s shoulder.
Poor Ben. He was like the unwanted guest at a black-tie event. It was as if he came in his farmer’s attire. He just didn’t fit in. Like Humpty Dumpty, Alice knew she had to be neutral. Her motherly instincts were to rush over and hug her daughter. In the end, it would only escalate the tensions between Ben and Jessica. The thaw had to come naturally if at all. Jessica was very stoic; perhaps before she could be in tune with others, she had to be happy in her own skin. They say “Time is a great healer.”
The wisdom of the drunk perhaps was more reaching than one knows. He had no more family for him to console with. He does give pause to others who dwell in their own misery. Dysfunctional as it was, the Randal family was still intact.
That is a feat, considering the devastation of the EMP attack. Jessica, as miserable as she was, did not show or feel any hostilities toward her family and friends.
When a wild horse is broken, it becomes passive. It is the state of mind that fills Jessica’s head. Family is important, but to her, Joshua is her future. The EMP strike and her dad have her pinned down. Like a short-timer in the service, all she can do is await her window of opportunity for release.
For Ben it is a time of anxiety and tepid moves. He is fully aware of the minefield that he must traverse. Slowly, as the day unravels, more of the neighbors start filtering in. Ben’s son, Randy, has brought the survival radio over. Maybe they can get info that will give the collaborative hope. Many of the podcasts are simple repeats or government BS statements. As they were all listening, the president of the US made a statement. “We are making progress in repairing the grid. Teams are moving from northeastern Maine, south, and from the Mississippi east.”
“What a bunch of bullsh—” yelled the disgruntled union man.
“No, it’s true,” Jessica said in a soft voice. “Joshua and I saw a few teams in northern Maine. We saw them as we were headed to Tent City. It’s a big job, but they were out there. Even at night the crews are working.”
The drunk raised his glass and bowed his head. It was like a commercial. “Drink wisely my friends.” The divorcee put her hands on her mouth. Most were in awe of a glimmer of hope, a light at the end of the tunnel.
“What we saw, it’s going to take a long time before they reach us,” Jessica commented as if she was the new spokesperson. Still, she did not have a smile on her face nor did she make eye contact with her dad.
As Alice and her son Randy hugged. Ben’s reaction was very different. His head was filled with many conflicting emotions. To be su
re, the thought of the grid coming here is what they all were praying about. In Jessica’s choice of words: “Like an arrow through his heart.” She used the words “Joshua and I” and “What we saw.” Ben’s hands trembled as he glanced at Jessica. Her head was bowed again. Perhaps it was in sadness, or maybe it was in defiance. Either way, it struck fear and pain into Ben. He has lost. He is losing his daughter, his dreams. His seeds were planted but were now uprooting, not to be nurtured and used in a traditional Christian format. As Ben looked again, he recognized something was different about her. Besides her sadness, something was amiss. His son Randy was predictable; the apple that did not fall far. Jessica was his pearl, the glow that surrounded his soul, the fulfillment of his life’s journey.
As everyone was in a joyous moment, Ben’s head seemed like a circuit board that was overloaded. His blank stare now turned into a reality check. What’s different about his daughter? It hit him hard! He finally understood. Her face was really drawn. The clothes on her frail structure were loose-fitting. She really lost weight. Ben’s stomach turned into knots. Was it her misadventure? Or was it him? Who can he turn to? What of his wife, Alice? Can he confide in her? In his mind, he knows, Alice feels, he has caused the family rift.
With a deep breath, it now becomes a time of reflection. Ah, when the dreaded Yankees lost four in a row to Red Sox. Especially when they were ahead by three games for the American League pennant. Everyone thought it was a lock. As the Sox won in that final moment, how awful it was for the Yankee players. That is now how Ben feels: his confidence broken, his bravado taken.
How misery likes company. What to do? Ben took his eyes off Jessica. His eyes acted like a mobile TV cameraman. Slowly, he glanced the whole collaborative area. Many had smiles, but William did not. William was sitting next to Fred, his challenged client, and his wife. Being very polite, William just sat quietly, chewing on a few cashew nuts. Fred, on the other hand, was always on the hunt for food. Seems like his stomach would never be satisfied. In this needed moment, Ben was drawn to join them. Being around happy people would just make his emotional wounds worse.
EMP Causality Page 3