‘Dinner it is, then.’ I throw her another of my smiles, and try to look enthusiastic.
I’ll go to dinner.
I’ll turn on the charm and reel her in and she’ll become my newest client.
Then I’ll say goodnight and go have crazy sex with the woman I really want to be with.
Crazy, dirty, hot-as-hell sex…
Kira
‘You don’t go on tour anymore, Kira.’
‘Well, maybe it’s time I changed that.’ I pour myself a large glass of red wine and look up at my best friend. ‘What?’
‘Don’t I get one of those?’
‘Pour it yourself. I’m not your fucking slave.’
‘No.’ Joey sighs in a mock heavy fashion as he playfully nudges me out of the way and retrieves the wine bottle from my hand. ‘I’d have to pay your over-inflated prices if I wanted that particular pleasure.’
I kick him in the shin with the spiked heel of my boot. ‘And we both know that’s never gonna happen. I’m not what you want.’
‘Darling, you’re not even the sex I want.’
I can’t help but smile. Joey always makes me smile. Joey Princess – club owner and one of the region’s finest drag artists. He’s also my very best friend, something he’s been for the past ten years. He knows what I do, and he loves me regardless. He’s the only family I really have – him and all the other drag artists he works with at his club, Bam-Bams. Without him I’d be a broken wreck. Even more broken than I already am. He saved me. He’s the only person I can really trust. I tell him everything. He knows so many of my secrets, but he’ll never tell them to another soul. He knows the real me. He knows who I really am. And he’s the only person who does. The only person who ever will.
‘So, come on. Why the sudden need to go on tour again? Because you don’t need to. Girl, you have a list of clients right here that means you never need to set foot outside of this city again.’
‘Maybe I just fancy a change.’
He looks at me, and I know he isn’t buying any of this. I’m not even convincing myself. I know why I suddenly want to move temporarily to another city. And so does Joey.
‘What happened, Kira? Last night. What happened?’
‘I don’t know,’ I whisper, taking another sip of wine. I want to down the bottle. I want to sink into oblivion and forget.
‘Oh, for Christ’s sake…’ Joey lets forth another dramatic sigh. He’s good at them. They’re a speciality of his. ‘Was he hot?’
‘Joey… Come on…’
‘Was he seriously hot? Would I like him?’
My mouth twists up into a smirk, despite the confusion filling my head. ‘You’d love him. You’d want to ride his perfect arse for hours, believe me.’
‘But he prefers to ride yours.’ Another sigh, and I can’t help laughing.
‘Something happened, Joey.’
The mood suddenly changes, because I need to talk about this. It’s making me crazy, and I need to work out what’s going on, before it drives me insane.
‘Like what?’
I slide up onto the countertop, crossing my legs up underneath myself as I drain my glass of wine.
‘I know you’ve taken your calendar down, Kira. I heard you cancelling appointments. Does the agency know?’
‘I told them I’m not feeling too good.’
‘And? Are you feeling ill? Because you look fine to me.’
I shake my head and refill my glass. ‘I’m not ill. I’m just confused.’
‘Happens to us all at some point, sweetheart.’
I look down at my fingers gripping the stem of my glass, and all I can think about is Neal. I close my eyes and I see his face, his smile. I hear his voice, his laugh, the way he calls me “baby” as he fucks me…
‘Kira. Your phone’s ringing. You gonna get it? Or do you want me to answer it?’
I push it towards him. I’m not in the mood to talk to the agency or turn any more clients away today. And Joey’s not a stranger to taking my calls. He likes doing it. Says it makes him feel like my pimp. Escorts don’t have pimps, of course, and he knows that, but he does know how to handle clients when I’m not in the mood. So he’s useful to have around at times like this.
I watch as he puts the phone to his ear and walks over to the window.
‘Kira Blu’s phone… I’m sorry, she’s not taking calls at the moment… Sorry, who?’ He turns to face me. ‘Neal Cannon…? Well, Mr Cannon, like I said, she isn’t taking calls at the moment… No, she’s fine, but I suggest…’ He catches my eye, sees my expression change, and the look on his face says it all. He knows what happened last night. He knows why I shouldn’t take that call. But he also knows I’m going to. ‘Could you hold for just a second, please?’
He presses the phone into his shoulder and stares at me with wide eyes, shaking his head as he walks towards me.
‘You should think about this, Kira.’
Yeah, I should, but my thighs are aching to feel him between them again. Every promise I made myself when I walked away from him this morning, I’m breaking them. If he hadn’t called, I would have dealt with it. I would have done. I’d have dealt with it. But he called. And I’m going to him.
‘Just give me the phone, Joey.’
He hands it over with yet another heavy sigh, but he stays within earshot, and that’s fine. Like I said, we have no secrets. We protect each other. Or we try to.
‘Neal?’
‘Kira… Look, I know… Are you free tonight? Only, I noticed you’ve taken your calendar down, and I thought…’
‘Yeah. I’m free.’ I throw Joey a look as he folds his arms and shakes his head again.
‘Can I see you?’
‘How many hours?’
‘Overnight, Kira. I need you to stay with me again. I need you to stay with me the whole time I’m here, baby, I will pay you whatever you want…’
‘I can’t do that.’
He has no idea how much I want to. But I can’t. I can’t have him rent me out like some expensive plaything. I won’t let myself be that woman. Or have I already crossed that line?
‘I’ll stay the night, but I can’t be exclusively yours.’
I could be. If I wanted to be. I just think I need to keep that small amount of distance. He isn’t here forever, and as much as I ache to be with him – and I still don’t know why that is – he will leave at some point, and I need to know normality is still out there for me when he does.
‘Overnight it is, then.’
I can sense the disappointment in his voice, but it’s the way it has to be. Or I’m not going to get through this. ‘When do you want me?’
‘I’m gonna be back at the hotel around nine…’
‘OK. I’ll be there at ten. I’ll come straight to your room.’ For another round of fucked-up sex.
I end the call, and Joey’s still looking at me with pursed lips and folded arms. He knows I shouldn’t be doing this. He knows.
‘You’re making a mistake, angel.’
‘I’ve already made it, Joey.’
‘You got feelings for this man?’
‘I don’t know what I feel, alright? I just know I need to see him again.’
‘And that is so wrong, Kira. You never feel that way, you do detachment like a fucking pro. You keep your distance, you treat these men like the walking cheque books they are, you never, ever let them in. Ever. What’s so different about this one, huh?’
I drop my gaze, staring down at the phone in my hand. ‘I couldn’t stop it from happening.’
‘Yes. You could.’
‘He feels it, too.’
‘Which makes it even more dangerous. Kira, babe, how long have you been doing this now?’
Too long? ‘You know how long I’ve been doing this.’
‘And I’ve never seen you this messed-up. You’re messed-up, angel. You charging him for this?’
‘Of course I’m charging him.’
‘Well, forgive me, lady
, but for all I know you could be letting him stick his dick in you for free, you’re so fucking out of it.’
‘I never give it away for free, and you know that.’
‘Don’t you? Look at me, Kira. And tell me the honest truth here. Would you let this man fuck you for free? If that was the only way you could have him, would you let him fuck you for free?’
My answer scares me.
My answer terrifies me.
My answer tells me I’m not the woman I was twenty-four hours ago.
I don’t know who I am anymore.
Six
Neal
Dinner was good. Lee was the epitome of high-class English politeness. I had no need to fend off any advances, which made me think she was perceptive enough to know I keep away from mixing business with pleasure. It’s a rule I will never break. I have a reputation to uphold.
So, all in all it’s been a successful day. Business-wise. I’ve gained a new client. My list continues to grow, and as far as that side of things is concerned it’s looking good. As far as my personal life goes, that’s as fucked-up as ever. I could have called any escort tonight, tried another girl, moved on from last night, because that’s what I usually do. But I’ve broken that self-enforced rule. I’m seeing the same escort twice. And I have no idea how this is gonna pan out now; what mistake I might be making. I just know I need to see her again.
I close the door of my suite behind me and slip off my jacket, throwing it over the chair before I pull off my tie, throwing that down on the chair, too. But I pick it back up almost immediately, turning it over and over in my hand and I smile. Maybe what I need to do now is move this second night with Kira back to what it needs to be – just hot, horny sex with no time to think about anything else. And anyway, who knows if I’ll feel the same about her when I see her again. Last night could’ve been nothing more than one crazy night caused by any number of things – I was tired, still getting used to a strange part of this country; a new city. Tonight could be totally different.
I take the tie, head into the bedroom and set it down beside the bowl of condoms I’ve placed on the nightstand before going into the bathroom. I need a quick shower before she gets here, and I’m late back from dinner with Lee so I don’t have a lot of time.
Very little time, it would seem. In fact, I only have enough time to exit the shower and throw on jeans and a shirt before I hear the knock at the door I’ve been waiting for since the second she walked out of it this morning.
I grab a condom from the bowl and shove it in my back pocket before I almost run through the living room to the door. I feel like a fucking kid at Christmas; it’s crazy! But I also feel alive, and I can’t really explain it, because I don’t think I’ve ever felt this way before. Not for a while, anyway. I can only assume I must have been dead inside for a long, long time.
Flinging open the door I smile as I see her standing there in a thigh-skimming green dress and killer heels, a sexy-as-hell smirk on her beautiful face as she holds up a hand and swings her panties from her fingers. She’s a living, breathing wet fucking dream, and that’s how I have to think about her now. That’s how she has to appear in my head, it’s the only way I can do this.
Pulling her inside I kick the door shut and push her back against the wall, our mouths already together, the kiss urgent and desperate and I’m so ready to fuck her till the sun comes up. I have her dress up around her waist within seconds, but my cock was ready to go much sooner, and with her crazy-long legs wrapped tight around me I’m inside her once again, plunging into that warm, wet heaven I spent so much time in last night.
Neither of us has said a word yet. I guess there’s no need to talk, we both know why we’re back here. And the relief I feel as I thrust in and out of her is all-consuming. But this first fuck really is just a relief fuck. I’m getting rid of all the fear and frustration last night heaped on me; ridding myself of the irrational feelings this woman has caused to surface. They weren’t – aren’t real. And after tonight I’ll know that. Just one more night like this and I’ll be ready to get back to normal – faceless women, meaningless sex. But I’ve still got one more night…
She comes first, her cries of pleasure filling my ears, causing me to come too as our bodies buck together, her legs gripping my hips so tight it’s almost verging on painful. And then the waves subside, and I slowly pull out of her, our eyes finally meeting.
You’re kidding yourself, Neal.
You’re fucking kidding yourself.
Kira
I’m going to be full-on Kira Blu tonight. He’s going to get the works. I’m going to be everything from a dirty porn-star to the filthiest, naughtiest fantasy he can think of. He won’t have time to think, let alone allow irrational feelings to overtake anything that’s really going on here – which is sex. Pure and simple. I’m here to fuck him. All night. And he’s paying me another thousand pounds for the privilege of a second all-night pass.
‘Here we are again, Mr Cannon,’ I whisper as I slowly undo his shirt, sliding my hands inside to touch his warm, soft skin and I can’t stop the shiver that ripples through me. ‘Here we are again.’ I lean in closer, and I kiss him. A slow, gentle kiss that he responds to immediately. His arm circles my waist, pushing me against him as the kiss deepens. Our tongues entwine, his hand dropping to my bottom and I can feel his cock, hard and ready to go again, digging into my thigh. I slide my fingers into his hair as we continue to kiss long and deep, but I know I need to pull back now. I need to stop this, and move on.
‘It’s good to see you, Kira,’ he murmurs, his mouth still resting against mine.
But I don’t reply. I can’t give him anything on that score. I’m here to give him sex, and an experience he’ll never forget. That’s all. Anything else is off the agenda, I promised Joey. I promised myself. And I know he’s a little hurt that I haven’t said something in reply to him, but if I do it’s going to open up a Pandora’s Box of crap that I may never be able to close. I’m here, but I’m compromising. I have to. Or walking away is going to be so much more difficult than it has to be.
‘Come on.’ I pull back from him, take his hand and lead him into the bedroom. ‘It’s time to play.’
‘Kira… hang on.’
I stop, and I really don’t want this conversation, but once again I have to remember that he’s a client. This is a job. I need to keep him happy. Within reason.
‘You’re OK, aren’t you? About being here, I mean.’
I give him a small smile. ‘I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t. I’ve temporarily taken my calendar down, remember? So, yeah, I’m OK, about being here.’
‘Why did you do that? Take your calendar down, I mean.’
I look at him, cocking my head slightly. I’m not going to let his baby-blue eyes and beyond-handsome face throw me tonight. I’m just going to enjoy them. ‘I’m here. That’s all you need to know.’
He bows his head briefly before raising his gaze, his eyes once more meeting mine. And his expression has changed. I think he realises the situation we’re in here. I think he knows as much as I do what we have to do to get through this night and still be sane in the morning.
He jerks his head back towards himself and smiles the most thigh-trembling sideways smile that, I swear, has just made me wet in under a second. ‘Come here, beautiful.’
I step back into his arms and slowly push his shirt back off his shoulders, revealing that taut, toned washboard stomach that could send any self-respecting, red-blooded female over the edge.
‘You ever been tied up, Kira?’
I smile. Of course I’ve been tied up. It’s quite a lot of men’s fantasies, having a submissive female there for the taking. And as long as they play nicely I’m quite willing to play, too. ‘You’ve read my profile. So you know the answer to that.’
He reaches over to the table by the bed and picks up a tie, flashing that smile of his as he twists the dark material between his expert fingers – fingers I can’t wait to feel in
side me. Soon. Very soon.
‘Take the dress off, leave the shoes on, and lie down.’
His voice is all husky and dominant, and I swear to God I’ve never been so wet! So of course I do as I’m told, ridding myself of my dress and lying down on the bed.
He leans over me and takes my hands, binding my wrists together above my head with the tie, gently pulling at the knot to make sure it’s secure. I’m at his mercy now; he’s in control, and that’s OK with me.
‘Legs up and wide open, baby.’ He almost growls the words, and my stomach dips so low I can’t help but gasp out loud as he slides my legs up and spreads them wide. And all I can do is watch as he gets naked, too, every inch of his heartbreaking body on show now, his cock hard and ready and I want it inside me so bad I’m not sure how long I can hold out.
He leans back over me and runs his tongue lightly over my pubic bone as his fingers stroke my labia, teasing me to the point of painful frustration as his tongue moves further upwards. And then his fingers find my clit and his mouth is kissing my breasts, sucking on one nipple then the other before he slips his fingers inside of me, and I buck my hips gently as he delves deep.
His teeth gently bite down on my nipple and I let out a small cry, in shock more than anything. It didn’t hurt, I just wasn’t expecting it, but as his tongue flicks back and forth that cry turns into a low, guttural moan. He has me now. He had me last night. Because I can’t resist this.
He’s finger-fucking me hard, and I’m taking it, but I want more. I want to feel more. And I think he knows that, but he’s making me wait, because he has the power here. In this game. But I’m not saying it’s going to be that way all night. I don’t think he wants it to be that easy.
I gasp as he carefully slides his fingers out of me, running them back over my clit, nipping it gently between his thumb and forefinger and he smiles, and my heart doesn’t know whether it’s breaking or beating. I’m still as confused as fuck, and I begin to think Joey may have been right. This could be the biggest mistake I’ve ever made. But I don’t have time to let that thought fester, because he’s pushing into me now, taking me fully, his hands on my knees keeping my legs as wide apart as they can physically go as he slams into me with a force I never felt from him last night. But I’m feeling it now. He’s fucking me hard and heavy, as though he’s taking every ounce of frustration out on me, and I can’t touch him. My hands are, quite literally, tied, and I’m so turned-on it’s almost sick.
Allure (Forbidden #1) Page 5