by Lynsay Sands
When they all fell silent then, Murine nodded and then paused as if trying to recall what came next. After a moment, she muttered, "Oh aye," and stuck the carrot down the neckline of her gown to nestle between her breasts.
"Oh, say," Niels said with surprise. "Saidh was giving ye some advanced instruction."
Murine glanced to Niels with confusion, which Jetta thoroughly understood. She was a bit confused by his comment as well. However, while she remained confused, Murine peered down at the carrot between her breasts and quite suddenly seemed to understand, because her cheeks immediately turned a bright crimson and she reached as if to withdraw the carrot.
"Don't," Dougall said, making her pause. "Ignore my idiot brother, wife, and continue with it just as Saidh did."
Smiling gratefully at her husband, Murine nodded and let her hand drop from the carrot. Leaving it tucked snugly between her breasts, she soldiered on, "As I mentioned, Saidh was verra thirsty, and at this point tucked the carrot just there while she poured herself another goblet o' wine."
Murine picked up her empty goblet, pretended to down another glass full and then moved in front of Jetta again, and held up the bread and empty goblet. "Right. This is you, and this is--oh hell." Murine made an exaggerated face of exasperation that suggested she was still mimicking Saidh, and set down the goblet to retrieve the carrot instead, before starting again, "This is you, and this is Aulay. And this is what will happen tonight," she announced, and pushed the larger end of the carrot into the slit in the bread. Although, of course, the carrot was much larger than the slit, and what she was really doing was mashing the bread dough with the carrot head, hammering it over and over again as she repeatedly drove the carrot into the dough and pulled it out.
"Dear God in heaven."
Jetta heard Aulay breathe those horrified words as she gaped at what Murine was doing to the poor bread, and then Murine announced, "But it's much nicer than it looks. He'll kiss ye and such, and ye'll get all excited and want to punch him hard in the face."
"What?" Jetta gasped, her eyes wide.
"That is what Saidh told me," Murine assured her cheerfully as she jammed the carrot into the bread as if the orange vegetable was her fist and the loaf Aulay's face.
Jetta turned to Saidh askance. "Punch him?"
"That's how I feel," Saidh said with a shrug. "That if he does no' end this sweet torture and give me my release soon I will have to punch him."
The men around them were divided in their responses. Saidh's brothers burst out laughing, Uncle Acair rolled his eyes and shook his head, Cam looked startled at the words and Greer just grinned.
"But," Murine continued, "Saidh said that ye'd then feel like an explosion has gone off inside ye, and 'twould be so nice." Murine glanced skyward and released a long, starry-eyed sigh as if pondering the release, but she was obviously still portraying Saidh's conversation with her, because in the blink of an eye the expression was replaced with an inquisitive expression as she turned to Jetta and asked, "Understand?"
Unable to speak at the moment, Jetta nodded weakly.
"Oh, thank God," Murine muttered and tossed her props over her shoulder and then eyed Jetta's wine and asked, "Are ye going to drink that?"
Jetta shook her head.
Murine smiled. "Which was my answer as well, and as I watched, Saidh grabbed it up and chugged it down. It was at that point I thought it might be best all around did Saidh have all sons and no daughters with Greer. For surely, no young lass should have to hear the marriage bed described that way," she finished and then signaled the end of her little show with a curtsy.
"Bravo!" Niels said on a laugh, beginning to clap.
"Aye, fer a minute there, I actually believed ye to be Saidh," Cam said with a grin as he too clapped.
"This is the second time I've seen it and it still amuses me." Jo chuckled.
Beaming, Murine gave another curtsy and then hurried around the table to reclaim her seat.
Biting her lip, Jetta glanced to Saidh then to see how she was taking all of this, but Saidh was sitting and looking completely unperturbed. Catching Jetta's concerned gaze, she shrugged mildly and said, "'Tis what happens."
Her words brought a groan from Aulay that drew Jetta around to see the dismay on his face. Frowning, she shifted her gaze uncertainly toward Dougall.
Her brother-in-law gave her a reassuring smile, and patted Aulay on the back. "Relax, brother. 'Tis fine."
"I do no' see what everyone finds so funny," Saidh said, drawing Jetta's attention away from her husband. "There was nothing wrong with me instruction to Murine. That is exactly what happens."
Jetta bit her lip to hide her amusement and then heard Aulay mutter in response to Dougall, "Aye, ye can say that. Ye'd already bedded Murine when she was given that horrible instruction. But Jetta is still untried and like to stay that way forever after that display."
No one else heard the words. Jetta barely caught them herself, and yet, for a moment, the entire room went silent around her. It took a moment for her to realize that it was her. The room hadn't gone silent at all. She could see people moving and talking, but could hear nothing. There was no clinking of metal, no lighthearted chatter, no laughter. Everything was suddenly silent, which left her mind screaming as it rushed madly about like a mouse loose in a pantry full of food.
She was still untried? Had they never consummated their marriage? Why? Did he not find her attractive enough? Had he not wanted to marry her? Or was it the other way around? Had she refused him her bed? Perhaps, as she had feared, she'd been repulsed by his scar before losing her memories.
Jetta could not imagine that though. He was an attractive man despite the scar. But perhaps she had been understandably shy and reticent on their wedding night and he had taken that as rejection. Perhaps the shipwreck and her head injuries were the chance they'd needed to repair a marriage that had been limping along under misunderstandings and misperceptions. Aye, that seemed possible, and if so, she would grasp that chance with both hands and fix everything, for she had a good man, and was quite sure she could have an amazing marriage if she just worked at it.
That decision seemed to act like a switch, turning the sound back on for Jetta as Murine said, "I love ye, Saidh, and ye ken it. And much to me surprise, while I thought it might be best did ye have lads and no' lassies, now ye've had the triplets, I see how lucky they are."
"Triplets?" Jetta echoed with surprise, briefly distracted from her worries.
"Aye," Murine told her, leaning forward to see her past Saidh and Greer. "Saidh gave birth to triplets just six months ago."
"Oh my God! I am an aunt thrice over?" Jetta gasped, eyes wide. She then frowned as she wondered if she was still an aunt if her marriage had not yet been consummated. Were she and Aulay even legally married without the consummation?
"We all are," Edith said excitedly, reclaiming her attention. "Well, except for Jo, but she is their Godmother."
Jo nodded with a smile. "And we are going to betroth my Bearnard to the eldest girl, little Rhona."
"And then ye'll be family too," Edith said with a grin. "We'll all be related!"
Jetta smiled faintly as the women all grinned at each other, and then commented, "Rhona is a lovely name. What names did ye give the other girls?"
"Sorcha and Ailsa," Saidh said at once.
Jetta's eyes widened incredulously. "You named one after me?"
Aulay froze when Jetta said that. He was not the only one. There was a sudden and complete silence among the people seated around him, and no one at the high table was now moving or speaking. All sat gaping at Jetta with wide eyes, even himself. He sat still, watching her eyes round with realization and then flood with emotion as she turned to stare at him. He saw confusion, heartbreak, fear and grief, and then pain. Eyebrows drawing together in concentration, she stared at him briefly and then stood up, as if wanting to escape the knowledge filling her. But the moment she put weight on her foot, she cried out in pain and then tumbled
sideways over the trestle table bench, her head plummeting toward the Great Hall floor.
"Jetta!" Aulay roared, leaping to his feet, but was not quick enough to catch her before she hit the floor. Cursing himself for failing her, he knelt to gather her into his arms.
"She hit her head again," Alick said with dismay, kneeling across her body from him.
"The crispin cushioned her head when she fell down the stairs. I am sure it did it this time too," Saidh said, joining them.
"Then why has she lost consciousness again?" Aulay asked grimly.
"I do no' ken," Saidh admitted, eyeing Jetta unhappily.
"I'll fetch Rory," Alick said straightening.
"Have him come to my room," Aulay ordered, standing up and carrying Jetta toward the stairs on his brother's heels. He peered down at Jetta as he took the stairs, noting the pallor of her face and the pained wince her brows were forming. He suspected she'd regained her memory, or at least part of it. Something about her expression after she'd said "You named one after me?" had told him she was remembering something, probably who she was, and more important to him, who she wasn't. Aulay was quite sure she now knew he was not her husband, and he was scared to death about what that might mean for him. He'd not got to tell her himself, or to explain. And if Saidh was right, that was a very bad thing.
"Pull back the linen and furs so he can lay her in the bed."
Aulay glanced around at that order from Saidh, somewhat surprised to find that he'd reached the master bedchamber while distracted by his thoughts. Well, they'd reached the master bedchamber, he realized as he noted that his entire family had followed him, from Uncle Acair on down to Jo and Cam Sinclair, who weren't strictly family yet, but would be someday if their son married young Rhona. The only ones missing were Rory, Alick, Conran and Geordie.
Aulay had barely had the thought when Rory rushed into the room with Conran and Alick on his heels.
"Alick said Jetta hit her head. Again," Rory growled, rushing to the bed. "What happened?"
"What happened is she remembered her name was no' Jetta, but Sorcha or Ailsa," Cam announced solemnly.
Rory's eyebrows rose. "Which is it? Sorcha or Ailsa?"
"We do no ken," Saidh admitted, eyeing Jetta with concern. "We were talking about Rhona marrying Bearnard someday. Jetta asked what my other two daughters' names were. I told her and she said, 'Ye named one after me?'"
"And then she fainted," Edith added worriedly.
"I do no' think she fainted," Murine argued. "She tried to stand up, and when she put weight on her injured ankle, she cried out and fell, hitting her head."
"Either way, it would seem her name is either Sorcha or Ailsa," Jo pointed out.
Much to Aulay's relief, Rory ignored the women and moved up beside him to examine Jetta.
"I pulled back the linens and furs," Dougall said. "Ye can lay her in the bed."
"Just let me remove her caul first," Rory muttered, working on the headpiece. "'Twould be harder to remove with her lying down."
Aulay grunted agreement, and shifted his arm a little lower on Jetta's back to keep it out of the way as his brother fussed with the headpiece.
"Do ye want me to do it?" Murine offered, moving up beside them.
Rory did not answer at first, but after struggling briefly with the crispin, gave up and stepped back. "Aye. Please."
Murine immediately took his place and made short work of removing the headpiece. She then stepped away so that Rory could step up again and examine Jetta's head, first visually and then by running his hands over it.
"So her name is Sorcha or Ailsa," Edith murmured. "Can ye imagine? She has the same name as one o' yer daughters, Saidh. 'Tis like it was meant to be."
"Aye," Jo agreed, and then added, "but 'tis strange. Her accent is English, but both Sorcha and Ailsa are good Scots names."
"Mayhap her mother was Scottish, but her father English so that she was raised there," Murine suggested.
"She has no new bumps or injuries," Rory announced, drawing his attention again. "Lay her down and tell me what happened. She remembered her name. Is that all?"
"I do no' think so," Aulay admitted as he set her gently in the bed. "I think she remembered a lot more than her name."
"What makes ye think that?" Alick asked with surprise as they watched Rory lift her eyelids and peer at her eyes.
"Her expression when she turned to me. She looked . . ." Aulay paused and frowned as he recalled the gamut of emotions that had rushed across her face. "Verra upset," he said finally, if a little lamely. Considering the matter, he frowned and added, "Although, she did get that pained face she gets whenever she tries to remember something, so she may no' ha'e remembered everything. She appeared to be trying to remember more."
"In other words, ye do no' ken what she remembered," Rory said, finishing with his examination and straightening to eye Aulay as he said, "Her name may be all she did remember, and is upset because we have not been calling her by it."
"Which probably told her we ha'e been lying to her all this time," Saidh pointed out grimly, and then scowled at Aulay. "I warned ye. I told ye ye needed to tell her the truth ere she discovered it for herself. Now she'll no' ken what to think, and will no' trust us when all we want is to keep her safe."
"I was going to tell her," Aulay assured her defensively.
"He was," Rory admitted, his tone sharp as he added, "despite my insistence that he should not and that she needed to feel safe and loved in the bosom of her family to heal. He was going to ignore that advice and tell her after the sup."
"I was going to ask her to marry me too, though," Aulay pointed out, glowering at him. "That should have let her know she was cared for and would be kept safe."
"Safe from what?"
Aulay's gaze jerked from Rory down to Jetta, where she lay with her eyes now open.
Chapter 13
"Jetta. Ye're awake," Aulay said with relief, settling on the side of the bed and taking her hand.
"Sorcha," she said tightly. Avoiding meeting his gaze, she tugged her hand free of his and repeated. "Safe from what?"
"The man yer family was sending ye to marry and whoever pushed ye down the stairs," Aulay said quietly. Trying not to be hurt by her pulling away from him, he let his own hand rest in his lap.
She met his gaze then, her eyes wide. "I am to marry someone else and you allowed me to think we were husband and wife? You let me betray my own betrothed?"
"Nay," he said at once. "He was no' yer betrothed."
Confusion immediately filled her face. "But you said--"
"Ye were somewhat conscious when we found ye, and seemed to still ha'e yer memories then," Aulay interrupted to explain. "And when I tried to soothe ye and said we'd find yer family and see ye safely to them, ye got quite upset."
"Aye," Alick put in, moving closer. "Ye fashed something awful at the thought o' our taking ye to yer family. Ye seemed terrified and said something about a cat, and a white lady and a betrothed who was no' yer betrothed, but ye were being forced to marry him, and how he'd kill ye like his last wife." Nodding to emphasize his words, he added, "Aulay had to promise ye we'd no' take ye to yer family until ye were hale and healthy again to calm ye down."
Jetta frowned, her gaze sliding between Alick and Aulay now.
"But when ye woke up ye did no' remember anything," Aulay added solemnly. "Even who ye were. And ye asked me was I yer brother, and when I said nay, ye decided I was yer husband and--"
"And you did not bother to correct me," she said, her voice sharp.
"I did no' really get the chance," he said and reminded her, "Mavis came in and then Rory, and--"
"And," Rory interrupted, "when he told me ye'd mistaken him fer yer husband, I told him it was better to let ye think that fer a bit."
"Why?" she asked with amazement.
"Because it soothed ye to think ye were among loved ones, and I felt sure ye'd heal faster were ye feeling safe and cared for. Ye were still very ill at the ti
me," he reminded her. "Ye'd no' had anything but broth dribbled down yer throat fer three weeks. Ye were rail thin, and so weak, I was no' even sure ye'd survive. But I thought ye'd ha'e a better chance at survivin' did ye think ye were safe and home, rather than kenning that ye were in a strange place among strangers."
Jetta breathed out a sigh and closed her eyes wearily.
"Jetta. I mean, Sorcha," Rory began.
"Jetta," she interrupted quietly, knowing she was probably confusing them. She'd just corrected Aulay when he'd called her Jetta moments ago and referred to herself as Sorcha and was now doing the opposite. But she was confused too. While she knew her name was Sorcha, she'd become used to being called Jetta. Besides, she had no idea who Sorcha was and wouldn't until she regained her memories. Now, she felt like Jetta Buchanan. But she wasn't Jetta Buchanan, she thought unhappily.
"Jetta then," Rory said solemnly, before continuing, "I'm sorry if my decision to withhold the truth upsets ye. But I stand by that decision, lass. Despite the trouble it caused in the family. I think it did help ye."
"Trouble?" she asked with surprise, her eyes blinking open.
Rory hesitated and then said, "I'll explain the trouble in a minute, but first, ye ha'e to tell us, did ye remember anything else but ye're first name? Do ye recall yer family name? Or where ye're from? Or . . . anything?" he asked.
Aulay watched her expression change and knew the answer to Rory's question before she spoke.
"Nay," she admitted unhappily. "Just that I am Sorcha and that my mother named me that because she knew from the moment I came squalling into the world that I would be a bright light in her life. She told me that just ere dying in my arms," she admitted, the grief he'd seen earlier washing over her face again. Forcing it back, she said, "I tried to remember more. I tried to force it, but the pain got so bad I could not bear it anymore and then I put weight on my ankle and fell."
Everyone was silent for a minute and then Aulay patted her hand and murmured, "I'm sure the rest will come."
Much to his relief, she didn't pull away from his touch this time. He didn't push though, merely patted her hand and then withdrew his own.
Peering at Rory, Jetta raised her eyebrows in question. "The troubles caused in the family by not telling me who I really was? Ye were going to explain."