Teabags & Tears

by Woods, Karen

  His lips quivered and he sunk his head low as he told her. “It was Zac and his heavy men. Look at the state of me Sandra, they’ve nearly killed me.” Forgetting about her night of passion she ran to the bathroom. She had a medical kit there. She could at least clean the wounds up and assess the damage.

  Entering back into the bedroom she dabbed the white fluffy balls of cotton wool onto his face. She’d brought a small bowl of warm water to dip it into as well. As she wiped his face he screamed in pain. “Fucking hell, take it easy will you?” His face screwed up and he looked in pain. Her hands shook as she wiped the dried blood away from his skin. She could see a big chunk missing from his cheek. He definitely needed medical attention.

  “Kevin you need to go to hospital you’re a mess. I’m going to phone an ambulance.” She stood from the bed as his hand gripped her pulling back towards him.

  “Don’t fucking phone anyone, you silly twat. Do you want the dibble involved, because they will be you know. And then what?” Her face changed. She tutted as she remembered the man sat before her like a wounded animal. He deserved everything that was coming to him, the wanker. She stood from the bed carrying the small bowl of water in her hands. Kevin now shouted after her. “If you phone an ambulance I swear I’ll twist you up?” His voice got louder. “Do you hear me?” Sandra nodded as she left the room.

  Slowly she tipped the water down the plughole. Running the water to clean the bowl she was faced with her own reflection in the mirror. She’d changed. She no longer looked like the weak, scared, Sandra she’d always seen. She looked different.

  Sandra took her clothes off and got into bed. Kevin was still lying on the bed feeling sorry for himself. As she turned away from him he dug his clenched fist into the small of her back. “What the fuck are you doing going asleep, I need some help here, don’t you care that I’ve been beaten half to death you inconsiderate bitch.”

  Sandra slowly turned round and glared at him. She spoke with a calm voice and meant every word. “You ever touch me like that again nob rash and I’ll take you to the fucking cleaners. Do you think you can just punch me like that and I’ll just take it?” Her face leant into his. Their noses were nearly touching. “Don’t ever raise your hand to me again. Do you understand?” Oh she’d really overstepped the mark now and he wriggled about in the bed gripping her hair.

  “Who the fuck are you talking to? Do you think you can chat shit to me?” He screamed as he tried to stand up. He couldn’t deal with her at the moment and she knew it. A smile filled her face. Turning her body away from him she spoke in a cocky manner.

  “Get in bed you daft cunt. No wonder you got twatted. You probably deserved it.” He was fuming and fell back onto the bed. Staring at the back of her head he lifted his hand back and swung at her. She accepted the blow and just pulled the cover over her head. She had other things on her mind at the moment and he certainly wasn’t one of them. Snuggling in to her pillow she smiled as her night of passion came to her mind. She was having an affair and she loved every minute of it. Sandra closed her eyes and pretended to be asleep. She could still hear the moaning fucker at the side of her. She felt no remorse for him and prayed that the pain he felt would be enough to wipe the smile from his face for good.

  Kevin stared into space as he watched his wife sleep. He needed her but the snoring noise coming from the side of him told him she was fast asleep. As he cried in pain he pulled his mobile phone from his pocket. As he searched the screen he looked for any new text messages. The inbox was empty. His fingers now pressed at the black keyboard on his Blackberry phone. “Where are you, I need you!” he wrote. Pressing the send button he watched the screen button until the sent message symbol appeared. Trying to get comfy he rested his head back onto his pillow. Sleep was a million miles away and he lay staring at the ceiling. He was in deep shit and couldn’t see a way out. A tear formed in the corner of his eye as he sighed.

  *

  Tracy lay in her parent’s front garden as the morning broke. She looked weird. As she lifted her head from the grass, she took in the scenery around her and realised where she was. Struggling to stand she swayed and had to grab a nearby wall to help her balance. Her fingers now felt the front of her head. She felt the prickled hair that was her fringe. As she stroked her hairline her face became white. She knew something was wrong and ran to her parent’s front door. Her clenched fist now hammered on the door. She was frantic. “Mam, mam open the fucking door” she screamed at the top of her voice.

  Standing back from the front door she looked at the top windows. She could see her mother’s face appearing at the window. Tracy shouted for her to hurry. Her mother could see she was in some kind of trouble and she left the window to open the door. Tracy sank to her knees and rested her hands on the front door.

  Tracy’s mother screamed when she saw her daughter’s face. Helping her up from her feet she brought her inside shouting upstairs at the top of her voice. “Graham, get down here quick it’s our Tracy.” Tracy was screaming when she was gripped in her mother’s arms. She knew her hair was missing and pulled from her grip to find the nearest mirror inside the front room. As her eyes focused on her face she noticed the tattoo on her cheek bone. Wetting her finger in her mouth she rubbed at her skin vigorously. Her face was now distraught and her mother was at the side of her trying to rub it off too.

  “Will you fuck off!” Tracy snapped. Her face was swollen and within minutes she realised the words were permanent. Anita was still at her side and read the letters on her cheek out slowly. S, L, U, T. You could see at that moment it clicked in her mind exactly what the word meant. Her husband was now at her side and he too was trying to clam Tracy down.

  “Who’s done this to you cock? Because I’ll have them done in. The cheeky cunts thinking they can get away with this!” He paced the floor in the front room as Tracy broke down crying. The front of her hair was missing and she didn’t have a clue who’d done it.

  “That’s it” her mother cried out. “I’m phoning the police.” Quickly sitting in the armchair she pressed the buttons on the phone. Tracy was folded in two now on the sofa, crying her eyes out. Her mind was blank and every time her mother asked her a question she screamed that she didn’t know. Her father sat at the side of her and stroked the back of her hair.

  The phone call to the police was over and she spoke quietly to her husband telling him they were on their way. Anita switched the kettle on. It was the only way she knew to calm the situation down. In a timid voice she spoke to Tracy. “Do you want a brew love? It will help calm your nerves?” There was no reply and she watched as her daughter’s shoulders jerked up and down as she sobbed.

  The police sat with Tracy and they could tell the attack on her had been planned. She told them all what she could remember and that left them with nothing much to go on. She gave the name of the pub where she had been and told them she was with her sister and her friends most of the night. The officer wrote down everything she’d told him. He’d seen this so many times before and asked Tracy if she’d been spiked. Her face looked vacant. “What do you mean spiked?” The female officer now explained in more detail. “Rohypnol is a drug that will make you forget most of the night. The way you are describing what has happened to you it sounds like it’s the effect of the rape drug.” Tracy shook her head. She was shivering now and her teeth were chattering together. Her mother grabbed her cardigan from her shoulders and placed it around her child.

  Tracy took a moment to speak. She stuttered. “So I’ve been raped as well”? Her head fell between her legs now and she jerked her knees up and down.

  Graham was saying the word out loud. “Rape, you mean my daughter could have been raped?” The officers felt his pain as he sank in his chair. Everyone’s eyes were now on Tracy as they told her she would have to go to the hospital to be checked out.

  Tracy dragged at her skin and sunk her nails deep into her arms. “I feel dirty. I’m not going anywhere until I’ve had a wash.” The officer
explained she couldn’t have a full wash as the doctors would have to take specimens from her body.

  Tracy ran upstairs. She could hear her mother talking to the people sat in the room. “Surely she would have known if she would have been raped. She can’t have been raped surely?”

  Locking the bathroom door behind her Tracy held her back against it. Her chest was moving rapidly and she looked as if she was having heart attack. Ripping at her clothes as if they contained some lethal disease she threw them on the floor at the side of her. Standing there in just her knickers she slowly peeled them down her legs. Looking at the knickers in her hands she searched for signs of sex in them. Her eyes scanned the crotch of her underwear. There was no trace of anything. Her knickers were dry. Of course she had a few piss stains in them but that was normal. Bending over slightly she stuck her finger inside her vagina. As she pulled it out she held it to the light. She found no evidence of her having sex. With a flat palm she wiped the mist from the mirror as she stared at her face. She looked like a mental patient. The word across her face made her shake her head. Tears streamed down her face. She was a mess.

  With each stoke of the sponge across her face she tried to make herself feel better but nothing worked. A black cloud hung over her and the face she’d always been proud of was damaged. How could she ever rid herself of the name branded across her face for the world to see? Her mother’s voice could be heard outside the bathroom.

  “Tracy, are you alright? Come on love the police are waiting. The sooner you get to the hospital, the sooner they can catch the bastards who’ve done this to you.” Tracy huffed before she replied. She struggled to stand and her body felt weak.

  “I’m coming now. Just leave me alone mam. I’ll be ready when I’m ready.” Anita shouted to her again.

  “I’ve phoned our Sandra she’s on her way love.” Tracy didn’t reply and dragged the white fluffy towel from the radiator to wrap round her body.

  All eyes looked at Tracy when she walked into the living room. Sandra was distraught when she saw her baby sister in such a mess. The headband Tracy placed around the front of her head hid the missing hair, but no amount of make-up could hide the blue tattoo on the side of her face. She looked so different. Sandra came to her side and hugged her but her eyes focused on the word on her face. Who would do such a thing? Sandra looked as if she’d seen a ghost and walked from the front room. Perhaps Zac and the boys knew she was shagging Kevin and messed her up too.

  She searched for her mobile and hurried to a quiet place in the garden to inform Kevin what had happened. She knew he wouldn’t tell her his thoughts but he would know in his own mind that there could be a chance Zac and his boys were showing him they weren’t taking any shit and that they meant business by hurting his bit on the side too.

  Tracy sat in the police car. She felt like a grass as the neighbours on the estate were out in full force staring at her. Four women stood at a garden fence sipping their morning cuppas whispering to each other. Sandra now joined her and held her hand in the back of the police vehicle. Her sister looked a mess and she’d never seen her like this before. She looked so defenceless and vulnerable. The officers joined them and the journey began to the hospital. The two police officers spoke briefly to Tracy and told them she would be given an examination when she reached the hospital. They also told her she would be checked for the rape drug to see if it was in her system. Sandra gripped her hand and comforted her shaking sibling.

  The hospital was quiet and Tracy was led to a side room. The nurse asked them if they wanted a drink, “Tea with two sugars please” Sandra replied. Two chairs sat in the medical room and the desk in front of them was piled high with paperwork. Sandra could see the police outside talking to the doctor who kept turning to the room and gazing at the victim through the window. Sandra now held her brew in her hands. As she blew it to try and cool it down, she spoke to Tracy. “I wonder who it was. I mean to do something like that to you it must have been some sick bastard.” Tracy looked at her blankly. She just sat listening as Sandra continued. “Dad’s on the estate as we speak, you know what he’s like, he thinks he’s fucking Columbo, he said to my mam that he won’t rest until he gets the bastards.” Tracy raised a smile as Sandra continued. “I can’t believe you can’t remember a fucking thing though Tracy. Just try and remember something. At least then you’ve got something to go on.”

  Tracy broke in. “Sandra will you fuck off doing my head in? I don’t remember a fucking thing. Do you think if I knew for one minute who’d done this to me I wouldn’t tell anyone? Get a fucking grip will you.”

  Sandra looked embarrassed, “I was only trying to help.” The room was filled with silence and Sandra sat playing with the plastic cup running her finger round the rim of it.

  The doctor now appeared. He looked sympathetically at the victim. “Hello I’m Doctor Barnes and I will be dealing with you today.” He told Tracy she would be given a full examination and that a sample of her blood would be taken. The women followed him to another room.

  Once inside a nurse was also present and she handed Tracy a white gown to put on. Tracy now disappeared into a cubicle. After a few minutes she came back out and looked stressed. She looked so weak and fragile. Sandra was straight at her side giving her support. “Once this is done love, we can go home. Just try and be brave.” Tracy climbed onto the bed, tears were forming in her eyes as the doctor took a swab from her vagina. She could be seen gritting her teeth as the examination continued.

  Once the tests were over the sisters sat waiting for the news. Tracy was rocking to and fro as Sandra chewed on her fingernails. The word rape sent shivers through Sandra’s body and the thought of someone forcing sex onto her baby sister made her stomach churn. All the hate for her had disappeared from her mind. Gazing at her constantly Sandra prayed she hadn’t been raped.

  The doctors came back into the room after several hours had passed. His face looked serious and he sat down next to the women. As he spoke he kept his eyes firmly fixed onto the sheets of paper in front of him. “Your results are back my dear and there are no signs that you have been raped.” He looked up from his paperwork and stared at Tracy. “You do know that you’re pregnant, don’t you?” Tracy felt her face going red. She sat fidgeting as the doctor waited for an answer. Sandra looked pale. The colour seemed to have drained from her face as she too waited for Tracy to reply.

  “Yes I already knew.” Sandra stood from her chair. She wobbled as if her feet couldn’t carry the torment inside her head. She told them she needed the toilet and staggered to the exit like a wounded soldier.

  A few people were already in the toilets as Sandra rushed inside. She found an empty cubicle and quickly went inside locking the door after her. Holding her back against the door she dragged her fingers through her hair. Her breathing was rapid and she was panting like a dog in hot weather as she tried to regain her breath.

  “Dirty pair of bastards!” she cried. Covering her mouth with her hands she broke down. She knew the unborn child was her husband’s no matter what anyone else would try to tell her. She had to pull herself together and remain calm. Pulling her knickers down she squatted on the toilet. Her head felt heavy as it fell between her legs. Any sympathy she felt for Tracy now left her as she stood up and flushed the toilet. Her hands shook as she unlocked the door. Stepping towards the mirror she looked at herself. Smeared mascara was visible round her eyes and she knew she would have to get rid of it because they would have been able to tell straight away she’d been crying. Grabbing some tissues from a cubicle she wet it and slowly dabbed it near her eyes. Once it was gone she headed back to her sister.

  Tracy looked straight at Sandra and she could tell something was wrong with her. “There’s a trace of the rape drug in my system.” Sandra just nodded. Her fists were tightly clenched at the side of her and you could see she was struggling to keep from pummelling Tracy’s face. Tracy looked cocky now. She sat with her palm flat across her stomach. A cunning smile on he
r face.

  The doctor left them both and told them the police would want to see them before they went home. As soon as he left Sandra made no secret that she was upset.

  “So who’s the dad? You don’t even have a boyfriend.” Tracy sat swinging her legs and turned to her.

  “What do you mean I don’t have a fella? Who the fuck is Mark then?” Sandra screwed her face up.

  “Mark! You haven’t seen him for ages. Since when have you ever called him your boyfriend?” Tracy flicked her hair from her face.

  “Listen he’s the dad. I know who I’ve been sleeping with, you daft cow.” Sandra could tell she was lying, she hated her with a vengeance. All her hate came to the surface and she wished her sister dead, the lying little slag.

  The journey home in the taxi seemed to take forever. Sandra gazed through the window and didn’t say a word. She could see Tracy still holding her hand across her stomach and she wanted to beat the baby out of her there and then.

  Tracy’s parents were sat at the window waiting for them to return. As soon as they stepped from the taxi they were by her side. Her father now held her and she was escorted into the house like a war hero. Tracy now told her parents about the drug being in her system and her dad was fuming pacing the front room. “The dirty no good bastards, who do they think they are putting stuff like that into people’s drink. You could have died!” He dragged his fingers through his hair. The love of a father for his daughter now came to the surface. Graham came to her side and cradled her in his grip. “The main thing is that you are alright. You’re so lucky you know.” Sandra watched the commotion and felt sick inside. Lighting a cigarette she sat with her legs crossed at the dining table, she wanted to wipe the smile of everyone’s face. Clearing her throat she casually spoke.