Outback Heart

by Palmer, Fiona

  Peta came back, just like she promised she would, but on her next visit Troy had a room full of his Aquinas mates. They sat there joking and eating pizza, which he’d been allowed to order in. Peta wasn’t afraid of a room full of lusty teenage boys. Instead she sat on the end of his bed, pinched a bit of pizza and started chatting to them all. The guys had thought Troy was the bomb with an older girl visiting him. That day she’d worn little black shorts with a tattered white tank top and her black hair in a high ponytail. He remembered being captivated by her smooth silky skin and wishing he’d checked his hair. She stayed until it was time for the boys to go back to the boarding house.

  Peta visited every second or third day, and kept coming even when he’d run out of questions to ask her. Then they’d chat about their favourite bands. Peta loved Metallica. He’d never met a girl who liked the same music as him, right down to Foo Fighters, Red Hot Chili Peppers and Tool. And Peta knew stuff about the world, told him about politics and world news, which he didn’t know much about. It sure beat talking to the other girls he knew.

  Peta was also the one he shared his dreams with, or his old dream of playing AFL football, anyway. He didn’t see the pain and pity in her eyes when he spoke about it, not like with his parents or his mates.

  This visit, Peta walked in, strutting with her hands behind her back as if she had a dirty secret to share. Even more strange was the football jumper she wore over her black T-shirt and shorts.

  ‘Okay, you’re looking far too pleased with yourself. I’m worried,’ Troy said with a grimace.

  Peta threw her head back and laughed. ‘Ah, Troy, you’re getting to know me so well now. I’ve gotta stop visiting you.’

  His breath caught at the thought. ‘Please don’t. I couldn’t handle these four walls without you.’ Peta’s eyebrows shot up. ‘I mean, you’ve really taken my mind off of things,’ he added quickly.

  She rewarded him with a bright smile.

  Her hands were still behind her back as she stepped towards him. ‘But you’ll be out of here for good soon. You’ll probably be going home in, what, like, a week?’

  Troy nodded and looked down at his hands resting in his lap. He was wearing trackpants and a red T-shirt. He’d insisted on wearing his own clothes early on, especially in case Peta came to visit.

  ‘Hey, that’s a good thing, you know.’ Peta leaned against his bed.

  ‘Will you still stay in touch, when I’m out of here?’ He dared a glance at her as the heat spread up his cheeks.

  ‘Yeah, of course. We’re mates.’

  Troy was delighted and disappointed in that order.

  ‘So, do you want to know what’s about to happen?’ she asked.

  ‘What?’ What could possibly happen at the hospital, he wondered. He was sick of cards, chess and Monopoly.

  ‘Get some shoes on. We’re taking a walk.’

  They often went for little walks around the hospital, Peta showing him the spots with great views or vending machines with the best snacks. Troy was already attending gym sessions every day to build his wasted muscles. He was getting stronger. But he’d never be the boy he once was, the athlete on his way to a successful career.

  Troy unplugged his driveline from the mains, and took the battery pack that Peta held out to him. It didn’t worry Peta that he took a while to get it on, not like his parents who wanted to help him. He guessed Peta had been through all of it before and knew how good it was to accomplish things on your own. After all, he was the one who had to deal with this. No one else could carry his battery pack.

  ‘Let’s go.’

  Peta looped her arm through his, taking some of his weight. She felt so warm and soft, and together they headed through the ward. She guided him all the way to the parking lot of the hospital, towards her old 1977 orange 180B Datsun. She was proud as punch of her tiny relic, which she’d bought herself. Troy kept looking back to the hospital, waiting for the guards armed with wheelchairs to come to collect him. But there were none.

  Peta opened the car door and motioned for him to get in. When he baulked, she laughed. ‘It’s okay, that’s your surprise. I’ve got you a few hours pass from the hospital. Let’s go.’

  Troy glanced back at the massive hospital again. He was excited but scared too. It was the same world but he was different. He didn’t know how he fitted in yet.

  He felt pressure on his arm. ‘Look, believe me, it’s all above board. Niki said we could be two hours tops and I have to keep my phone on me at all times. You’ll be fine,’ she added gently.

  Troy took in her dainty features, and smiled. She always knew how he was feeling. He loved that about her. ‘Okay, I believe you,’ he said with a smirk. Peta was as good as any nurse when it came to knowing what to do with him. He was sure he was safe. ‘So where are we going?’

  ‘No, no, no, that will ruin the surprise. Hurry up and get your butt in my car or we’ll be late.’

  Now she had piqued his interest again. As they drove out of the hospital car park Troy felt an overwhelming sense of freedom and nervousness all at once. Then one glance at Peta, calm and cool Peta driving her car with a smile and humming to the radio, changed all that. He was excited – it was the first time he was alone with Peta. No nurses, friends dropping by, cleaners coming in or the tea lady coming past with her stale cookies.

  Troy watched the oncoming traffic flash by, the houses and people. With his window wound down he could smell the fumes, the cut grass, city smells. It was the sweet fragrance of real life – nothing disinfected or clinical about it.

  ‘My god, it smells so good. Not as good as being at home on the farm mind you.’

  ‘Yeah, sorry, I’m not driving you that far today,’ she said with a laugh.

  He turned to Peta. ‘Thank you. I can’t believe I’m out,’ he said.

  ‘This is just the beginning of the surprise,’ she said, pulling onto another street. Then she began to slow down. She was indicating to go into the Leederville Oval, known as Medibank Stadium. ‘What are we . . .’ he asked before fading off. There were a few cars parked around.

  ‘Let’s go get a seat,’ she said as they got out of the car.

  ‘Peta,’ he said cautiously. He didn’t know if he was ready to watch a game of football. He hoped his LVAD was fully charged in case his heart ached too much.

  Peta reached for his hand. He liked how easily she slipped her hand into his and was surprised at the strength it gave him.

  ‘It’s okay, Troy. Trust me. I think you’ll like this.’ She smiled and he knew he’d walk into a burning building if she led him.

  Together they entered the stadium and found a seat at the front. Troy felt the rush of nerves he got just from being near a football oval and he tried hard to hold onto that rather than linger on the memory of his lost football career.

  Peta snuggled close to him on the bench seat. Were his nerves jingling because of the footy or her? She rested her head against his shoulder; the scent of lavender from her hair soothed him.

  A few minutes later, after some more spectators turned up, the team ran onto the oval. It took Troy a few seconds to work out what was different.

  ‘They’re girls!’

  Peta was grinning. ‘Well done, Einstein. You’re about to watch the Coastal Titans play East Freo. These girls are the top league teams at the moment. Surprised?’

  Troy would have replied but he was blown away by the East Fremantle Sharks as they started their warm up. ‘Where have I been hiding? I didn’t even realise they had a women’s team.’

  ‘The West Australian Women’s Football League – pretty cool, huh? They mean business.’

  Troy faced Peta, who was still holding his hand. ‘How do you know about this? Did you play?’

  ‘Ha! Do I look like I could play? They’d grind me to a pulp in seconds. No, my best friend Nina plays and I’ve been watching her for years. I love the fact that the girls are out there, doing what they love no matter what anyone else thinks, you know?’


  Yes, Troy did know. That was something Peta was teaching him.

  ‘So, is this not too painful for you?’ she asked.

  Troy squeezed her hand and gazed at her in awe. ‘No, it’s perfect.’ Just by having her by his side he felt invincible. ‘You’re amazing, Peta. I don’t think I would be where I am without you.’

  ‘No, it’s not me, Troy. You’re amazing. You’ve handled all this so well. You’ve been so strong and brave. And you’re so sweet,’ she said softly.

  Troy swallowed hard and for the first time he knew they had turned a corner in their friendship. Peta gazed at him, her eyes large and mesmerising. She moved in close and her full lips touched his. He felt her hand caressing his cheek as she pulled back a fraction. Troy reached up and brushed her silky hair, tucking it behind her ear as the strands glided over his fingers. They smiled at each other and for that moment Troy forgot he’d nearly died, he forgot he couldn’t play football again, and he forgot he’d need someone else to die so that he could continue to live. It was just him and Peta and the burning desire he felt for her. Leaning across he kissed her again, this time a little harder. Her lips parted, her tongue flicked across his lower lip and he trembled.

  ‘I like you, Peta,’ he mumbled against her lips.

  She kissed him one last time before sitting back, but she was smiling and her face was slightly flushed. ‘Yeah, I guess you’re all right, too,’ she teased.

  They tried to turn their focus back to the game. Troy liked pointing out the great technical plays and the girls with lots of talent, but his eyes always came back to Peta. He felt like he’d just won the grand prize at the Royal Show.

  All too soon they had to head back to the hospital. ‘I don’t want to get in Niki’s bad books,’ she laughed. ‘I might be banned from seeing you.’

  Troy pulled her into a hug, holding her against him as they stood by her Datsun, the game continuing behind them. ‘Now, that just wouldn’t be fair. How soon can you come back and see me?’ he asked, brushing his fingers against her soft cheek.

  ‘Tomorrow, after work?’ she said.

  ‘Hmm, not soon enough,’ he mumbled.

  As he walked back into the hospital, Troy felt like he was floating, as if he were in a dream. He kept watching Peta, squeezing her hand to make sure she was real and it had actually happened.

  Peta walked him to his room, waited until he was plugged back into the mains power supply before dropping a kiss on his lips. ‘See you tomorrow, Troy.’

  For the first time in months Troy felt like the luckiest guy alive.

  14

  INDI crawled into the back of the Magna with her pillow. She had big plans of getting some sleep on the way to Merredin for their game against Burracoppin. Jasper was driving and their dad was in the front with him. Allan had made good on his promise to come and watch the game. She knew it was a big step and was thankful Troy had been able to help persuade him.

  She couldn’t believe Troy had been in their house the other night and she’d had to go to work. It would have been the perfect chance to get to know him better. No one seemed to know much about Troy. Everyone was talking about him, but no one actually knew anything, just that he was originally from Geraldton and previously Dowerin, with another few towns in between. She wanted to know about the things that made him tick. What caused the mysterious pain she sometimes saw flit through his eyes? And why on occasion did he watch her with curiosity when the rest of the time he treated her like one of the boys? She hadn’t been dreaming up the glances he’d cast her way, or had she? The last time she had convinced herself it was all wishful thinking, she’d been picking up balls at training and then turned to catch him watching her. Maybe he was just being a red-blooded male. It didn’t mean he actually liked her.

  Indi stuffed her pillow against the car window and nestled her head against it, already feeling sleepy. She’d had another all-night train in Pingaring so her eyes felt like they were dragging along the dry ground.

  Jasper and Allan chatted as they headed into Hyden, their soothing familiar voices causing her heavy lids to close. She was just about to nod off when she felt the car come to a stop. She assumed they’d stopped for supplies but when the back door opened and she felt a body get into the car, her eyes flew open.

  ‘Thanks for the lift,’ said Troy. His jeans pulled tight against his lean, long legs as he shuffled into the backseat. Her eyes moved up over his tight-fitting black T-shirt to his sexy stubbly chin. But it was his dark eyes that captivated her the most.

  ‘No worries, Yoda. Always better to carpool, and this way Indi can drive us all home after a few drinks at the Munty pub.’ Jasper turned around in his seat to look at her, his smile instantly irritating her.

  She ignored her brother. ‘Hey, Troy.’

  ‘Hi, Indi,’ he said politely as he put a small bag at his feet. ‘So how come this game is in Merredin?’

  ‘Better oval,’ replied Jasper as Indi punched her pillow and rammed her head further into it.

  How was she going to sleep with Troy beside her in the car? As she stifled a yawn, she knew she’d have to try or she’d be no good during the game. She willed herself to sleep but the scent of Troy’s cologne and the desirable body beside her kept her awake. She tried not to listen to their chatter and eventually the sound of their voices lured her to sleep.

  Nearly an hour and a half later she was woken by the sudden stop of the car and Jasper’s laughter as her head lurched forward. Bloody brothers, Indi thought. She sat up and stretched, her mouth dry, hoping she hadn’t dribbled in her sleep.

  ‘Have a good sleep, sweetheart?’ her dad asked.

  ‘Yeah, enough to get me through today. Not sure how I’ll cope with the whiplash Jasper just gave me though.’

  Jasper had stopped at the entry to the oval to pay. Meanwhile Indi kept her gaze out her window, not yet ready to face Troy with her dream fresh in her mind. If only the willing man in her dreams was like that in real life.

  ‘You didn’t have to come if you’re dead on your feet, Indi,’ said Troy.

  His comment made her angry. ‘I couldn’t miss this. I wait all week for game day. Besides, during seeding the guys play on no sleep, so why should I stay at home like a princess?’ she snapped. Indi risked a glance at him.

  ‘I just meant, don’t push yourself too hard.’

  She realised he was sincere and glanced back out the window with embarrassment.

  ‘Shall we go grab something to eat and find a spot?’ Allan said as he opened his door.

  Indi leaped out of the car and followed her dad. On their way to the clubhouse they ran into Tegan.

  ‘Hey, you’re here,’ Tegan said as she gave Indi a hug. She was wearing boots, leggings and a pretty blue dress. Indi felt scruffy in her running shorts and team shirt.

  ‘Ha, are you kidding? Jaffa would have a fit if I wasn’t here to cheer him on. Because it’s all about him,’ she added under her breath.

  Indi stared at her friend, noticing the dark circles under her eyes. ‘You okay?’

  Tegan smiled.’Yeah, nah, I’m fine. I wanted to go watch the hockey girls play but I can’t even do that. Don’t worry about me. I just got out of bed on the wrong side, I think.’ She laughed.

  ‘Well, you’re not the only one there. I’m feeling a bit snarky today, too. I’m just going to catch up with Dad and get a coffee. You want one?’

  ‘No, thanks. Jaffa will be back any minute. I’ll see you around. Good luck today.’

  ‘Thanks, Teegs.’

  Indi jogged up to her dad. ‘I need a coffee,’ she said with a yawn.

  He chuckled and Indi was so glad that he had come today. They walked towards the canteen. Indi pulled her wallet out of her shorts pocket. ‘My shout hey, Dad. Do you want anything else?’

  ‘A toastie would be good, love.’ He smiled.

  ‘Hey, Allan, great to see you here, mate,’ said Ian, slapping Allan on the back and then shaking his hand vigorously. Spud joined Indi
at the counter, leaving the men to catch up.

  ‘It’s good that your dad came, Indi,’ said Spud.

  ‘I know.’ She smiled as she gave Spud the once over. ‘God, look at you,’ she said, slapping him on the belly. ‘Lookin’ real good.’ In the five weeks since they’d started training Spud had lost a heap of weight, and she’d heard he was doing extra training at home. Maybe he wanted to knock Patrick off the best and fairest board this year? Spud was actually quite good looking, and it was much more evident now he’d lost all those extra layers. She hoped he found a nice girl to take care of him. Farming could be a lonely job and he was a nice bloke, too good to go to waste.

  ‘Spud, my man. Ready to die trying?’ asked Jasper, joining them in the line. Troy was right beside him but Indi kept her eyes on the queue in front

  ‘Too right, Willo. As long as it’s not a hundred-point loss like the last time we played them,’ replied Spud.

  ‘So ninety-nine is fine?’ said Indi as she handed over her money.

  ‘I’m not hearing much team spirit here,’ added Troy.

  ‘Well, that’s because you haven’t seen us play Burracoppin yet,’ Jasper said, laughing.

  They moved off to the side of the canteen line, Indi holding two cups of coffee and the toastie. Spud nudged her. ‘Hey, Indi, can you do some work on my shoulder now? I think I pulled something shifting a drum a few days ago and it’s been grabbing ever since.’

  ‘Yeah, sure. Let me get my bag from the car.’

  ‘I’ll come with you.’ Spud turned to Jasper and Troy. ‘I’ll see you guys later.’ He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

  ‘Oi, Spud – that’s my sister. I told you before you’re not going to get lucky,’ said Jasper.

  ‘A man can try. She might like the new me?’ he said, winking at Indi.

  Indi grabbed Spud’s arm and began to pull him back to the car. ‘I love the new you, Spud,’ she teased, ignoring Troy and Jasper.

  In the change rooms, Indi got Spud to lie down on a towel on the floor. She squeezed Deep Heat onto his back and began to massage it in. She dug and kneaded his muscles, making Spud groan in pain.