by Lane, Cheryl
Later that evening, William asked to speak to me out on the river-front porch after supper.
“I hope you don’t mind, but I talked to Ethan about you and him. He told me about you disappearing for a year, that he’d thought you were dead, and then he’d met and married Elizabeth.”
I began fidgeting with my dress, averting his gaze. “Yes, that’s true. I had lost all my memory during that year. That’s why I didn’t return. Ethan’s mother found me at a marketplace just recently and brought me to Wellington Cross, where they live. I gradually got all my memory back, except for how I came to lose my memory in the first place.”
“Then why didn’t Ethan annul his marriage to her and marry you when you came back. It’s obvious he still cares about you and you about him.”
I sighed, not really wanting to share such private information with this man I didn’t know very well. But since he’d been a friend to Ethan, and Ethan trusted him, I told him about Elizabeth being with child, and that was the reason I came to live with my brother.
“I do apologize if my inquiries are making you feel uncomfortable, ma’am. I’m just trying to get to know you better, and I care about Ethan. He was a good friend during the war.” He stood up to go over to the new bachelor’s quarters. “If you ever need anything, don’t hesitate to come to me.”
The following Sunday at Westover Church, Ethan greeted me briefly before services, but Elizabeth was by his side this time, looking better, much to my chagrin. “Hello, Madeline,” she said, feigning a sweet smile.
I sat on the opposite side of the church this time behind the Smith family, luring Jonas away from the Wellingtons to sit with me. I didn’t want to be near Elizabeth, though that didn’t stop me from looking over at her and Ethan from time to time. I caught Ethan looking at me one time, but once caught, he quickly looked back at the preacher.
After the service, as Jonas and I were preparing to leave, Ethan came over on the other side of our carriage, away from most everyone else, close to the graveyard, to talk to me. “I want to apologize for our last meeting. I was perhaps too brash about my concerns for you. I had no intentions of upsetting you. Please you accept my apology.”
There he went, being civil, making me love him even more. “Of course, Mr. Wellington,” I said formally. He touched my hand and helped me into the carriage.
“I also hope that in the future, you are able to resume sitting behind us in church. That tradition started long before either of us was born, and I hope you won’t let all this change that. Besides, Lillie missed you.”
“You’re right,” I agreed. “I will consider it.”
The Fourth of July was celebrated at the O’Loughlin parsonage on a hot summer day. All the local plantation owners and farmers brought food in carriages, gathering on the grounds surrounding the O’Loughlin’s barn, which was adjacent to the church. All of the Wellingtons were there, and Jonas and I, as well as William, who normally did not attend church with us. He brought Lillie a cornhusk doll that he had made, much to her delight. Ethan seemed envious but chatted with William briefly. The food and conversations were pleasant, but I was miserable watching Elizabeth fuss over Ethan, and spent most of my time talking to William, hoping to make Ethan feel a little jealous. I was glad when a sudden rainstorm ended the celebration. That didn’t stop the firing of guns into the air, however, before everyone left.
A week later, Ethan rode up the drive on Blackfoot and found me waiting on the carriage-side porch for Lillie. It was cloudy and very humid.
“I came to tell you that Lillie is ill with a fever, coughing, and a runny nose, so she won’t be coming today.”
“Oh, no. Poor little thing. Let me take care of her over here, Ethan. Elizabeth doesn’t need to be around a sick baby while she’s with child.”
“Mother is taking care not to let her around Elizabeth, or anyone else, for that matter. She’ll be fine there. I don’t think she would appreciate the carriage ride over. She really looks miserable.”
“Please, Ethan. I’m her mama. Let me do this for Clarissa, and for you.”
His gaze softened, and he got off his horse and came over to stand before me on the porch. “I appreciate the offer, I really do, but she’s relatively comfortable where she is, and Doc Parsons will be coming by later today. Besides, I don’t want you to get ill, but I thank you for the kind offer.” He took my hand in his and softly kissed it.
My throat tightened, and I had to clear it before speaking. “All right, but the offer still stands if you change your mind. Tell your mother to bring her over to see me as soon as she’s feeling better. I shall miss her.”
Without Lillie for the day, I asked Jonas to take us to the marketplace and try to get some herbs for my herb garden I wanted to start. I already had some lavender and sage that Clarissa gave me, but I wanted a few more herbs. Jonas agreed, leaving William alone at the plantation, which I wasn’t so sure was a good idea, but if Jonas trusted him, then I supposed I should, as well.
At the marketplace, we exchanged some of mother’s jewelry for some exotic pineapple, more coffee beans, tea, honey, and some herb plants of basil, oregano, lemon balm, peppermint, and chamomile. They all smelled wonderful on the ride back home, especially the basil, which had the strongest scent.
Once back at Magnolia Grove, the post delivered a letter from Catherine stating she would be delighted to come live with us. She and Virginia would arrive next week, after packing up and preparing her house for her husband’s nephew and his family who were coming to live there.
Later that evening, I fixed an early supper, which ended with slices of the fresh pineapple; it was heavenly. Ethan unexpectedly knocked on the door, and I invited him into the dining room to share the pineapple with us, to which he consented. After Jonas and William left the table, Ethan moved to the seat beside me, and I felt my heart beat faster at his close proximity.
“Doc Parsons came by and looked at Lillie. He gave her Balsam of Wild Cherry for her cough and told us to keep her rested. He said she should be herself again in a couple of days up to a week.”
“Oh, Ethan, I don’t know if I can go without her for a whole week. Couldn’t you please bring her by tomorrow? I promise to keep her quiet so she can rest. I won’t take her out into the garden with me at all. I’ll just rock her, sing songs to her, and read her stories. Please, Ethan?”
He laughed lightly. “You’re hard to refuse. All right, I will tell Mother to bring her on over tomorrow. She was quite fussy today. Besides not feeling well, I think she missed you.”
“I missed her, too.”
“I miss you, as well, Madeline.”
I had to stop him, looking away. “Please don’t say that. I can’t hear that right now,” I whispered, closing my eyes.
He got up to leave, and I hesitated before following him out onto the carriage-front porch. I told him about mine and Jonas’ trip to the marketplace and about all the herbs I bought for the garden I was planning beside the grape arbor.
“That sounds nice. I wish you luck with that.”
“I’m willing to share,” I said, smiling.
Chapter 21
First Steps
I got to see Lillie every day that week and we just relaxed while she got better. I sang songs to her, rocked her, and let her sleep next to me on my bed upstairs, as I still had not acquired a baby bed. Then she was taken back to Wellington as I prepared for the evening meal. It was really going to be nice having another woman around to help me out with all of the household chores.
The second day Lillie was here while being ill, I started a nasty habit of heaving in the mornings. I feared I had caught something from her, but I didn’t tell Ethan about it because I didn’t want him to keep her away from me. I did try not to get my face too close to hers, in case I was infected with some different germ. I ended up with a runny nose and slight sore throat, but tea with honey helped with that. I gave Lillie the same thing every day, too. By the end of the week, she was herself again an
d wanted to crawl around everywhere, and began pulling herself up to stand and actually walked around while holding onto the furniture. I told Ethan about that, and he was excited.
“Pretty soon she’ll be ready to learn riding horses,” he said to me, teasingly.
“Nuh-uh,” I said, teasing back. “She can’t do that till she’s at least 10.”
“Ten? That’s much too old. She’ll be in races by the time she’s 10. She has to start learning much earlier than that.” I laughed.
Ethan had started coming by every day with Clarissa that week to drop Lillie off and pick her back up since Lillie was sick. That way, Clarissa could hold her and keep her comfortable while Ethan drove the horses. I was thankful that Ethan agreed to this arrangement because that was the only way I was going to be able to see her while she was sick.
I was actually beginning to feel more comfortable being around Ethan again, even though my heart still ached for him. I knew it couldn’t be good for my heart, but I also couldn’t help feeling excited at seeing him each time. Now that I was out of Wellington Cross and away from Elizabeth, I felt more relaxed around him. It almost felt like we were dating, except there was no hand-holding or kissing, no promises of a future together; but we shared camaraderie in taking care of Lillie, and we fell into easy conversations about her. It was a bond I hoped would never be broken.
The next week, Ethan, Clarissa, and Lillie came up the drive, with another carriage following behind them. It was Catherine and Virginia along with a young black servant. Jonas, William, and I had been out on the river-side porch having coffee before starting the day with both doors to the manor open, so we were able to hear the arriving carriages on the other side of the house. We all exchanged happy greetings. Ethan seemed jealous and aloof towards William, which made me feel somewhat better. At least I knew he still cared about me and had some of the same feelings I felt when seeing him with Elizabeth.
Catherine was indeed the lady I had seen at the New Year’s Eve party. I would have to talk with her about that later. When I had written the letter to her inviting her to come live with us, I had not mentioned the party, but I did explain to her about my memory loss, where I had been living for the past year, and why I was not living with Ethan. She looked very much the same, though somewhat gaunt and thin. She could certainly do with some fattening up, as well as Jonas. Virginia was a striking young lady at the age of 10, who was petite with long golden blonde hair, just like her mother’s and shared the same blue eyes.
Catherine and Jonas seemed to take an immediate liking to each other. They both blushed when Jonas kissed her hand. How wonderful! I hadn’t even considered that perhaps Catherine might be matched up with one of the gentlemen here at Magnolia, but that would be something special. Jonas had a broken heart that needed to be mended, and Catherine might be just the person to help him do that. She even came with a daughter, an instant family. Maybe someone could have a happy ending around here.
The black servant, Sambo, was just a boy not much older than Virginia, perhaps 12 or 13. He was the ex-slave that Clarissa had driven up to Bellwood to help Catherine out. It was agreed that he would stay at Magnolia Grove as a hired hand and would help out in the corn fields. He was a freed slave whose mother died during the war and whose brothers left him during an escape before Emancipation. He didn’t know who his father was. He was not old enough to keep a house out on the property by himself; therefore, he was set up in the new bachelor’s quarters on the bottom floor, to have a room to himself. When he turned 18, he would be allowed to work as a tenant farmer if he wished, given a small piece of land, earn wages, and acquire a house of his own, if he chose. Until that time, he would work for food and shelter. Catherine stated she could teach him to read and write, as she had been a teacher.
Ethan and Clarissa left, and the day was spent getting the new arrivals settled. Catherine and Ginny, as she liked to be called, took two rooms next to each other on the same hallway as my room. I put Catherine across the hall from me, overlooking the river, sharing the balcony with me. This had been my parents’ bedchamber. Ginny took the bedroom beside Catherine’s, which looked out over the carriage-front side of the manor. I had spent the week before cleaning and preparing the rooms for them.
Sambo cleaned his own room and then went out immediately to check on the corn plants with Jonas. Catherine helped me out in the kitchen with supper that first night, which was a heavier meal than dinner due to the busyness of everyone on the plantation at mid-day. It was quickly determined that she was an excellent cook, and therefore she would take over the cooking duties while I cleaned the manor and tended the family garden.
While cooking together that first afternoon, I took the opportunity to talk to her about New Year’s Eve.
“Catherine, was that you that I saw at the New Year’s Eve party at the Smith farm in Bellwood?”
She turned around quickly and looked at me. “That was you! Oh Madeline, I’m so sorry. I wasn’t sure if that was you or not. We were far away from each other and I’d had a bit of wine, so I couldn’t be certain. Then when I saw…” She looked around to be sure no one else was listening. “When I saw that man kiss you, I thought for sure it couldn’t be you.”
“Please don’t tell anyone about him kissing me. I have told Ethan, but he may get the wrong idea if he hears it from someone else. I didn’t care for that man at all.” I told her about him telling me lies when I had lost my memory and didn’t know any better, and that he had been courting me like we were betrothed.
“Oh, well, that makes sense then. I’m sorry you had to put up with such a horrible man. Oh my goodness, I could have rescued you that night. I’m so sorry, Madeline. I didn’t want to get Ethan’s hopes up if I told him I saw you and it turned out not to be you. Besides that, I didn’t know how to get in touch with you after that night. I have thought about it a lot since that night, regretting that I didn’t at least approach you and talk to you, to see if it really was you. But that man took you away, and I didn’t see you again until right at midnight, just before you left.”
She scrubbed some carrots and then looked back up at me. “Can you forgive me, Madeline? I don’t want there to be hard feelings between us or for you to find it awkward with me being here.”
“Of course, I forgive you. It won’t come between us, I promise. I need you here,” I said, smiling.
“I know, but if I had said something sooner, if I had sent a letter to Ethan about it, he could have at least checked it out a little more. Perhaps he could have found you sooner, and he wouldn’t have married Elizabeth, and wouldn’t be expecting her child. You would be with Ethan right now. I’m so sorry,” she said again. She walked over and gave me a hug, more for herself, I think, than for me. “I feel just awful.”
It was all true, what she was saying and was something I had wondered about, why she hadn’t told someone she saw me, but I would just have to forgive her and forget about it. There was nothing we could do about it now. Too much time had passed and too many things had happened.
So I hugged her back and patted her on the back. “It’s all right, Catherine. It’s not your fault. The fault is Jefferson’s. He knew the truth and decided not to tell me, for his own selfish reasons. He’s the one to blame, not you. Now, let’s get this meal fixed and let bygones be bygones.”
“Okay,” she laughed and wiped back tears. She genuinely did care about me and felt sorry, which made me feel better. We finished cooking the meal with a newfound camaraderie.
Later that evening, I took Jonas a cup of coffee into his study, where he was going over paperwork and organizing files.
“We sure have a lot more mouths to feed now, don’t we?” he said after I sat the cup on the desk beside his oil lamp.
“Yes, and I think it’s going to be a wonderful distraction for both of us,” I said, smiling. He looked up at me and returned my smile.
“You’re right, of course. Thank you for bringing life back into this house. I don’t know how
I’ve made it alone for so long. I was thinking of planting winter wheat in the corn fields after that’s harvested. That way, we will have income by spring, and more reasons to keep William busy.”
“I’m sorry to add to your burden, dear brother.”
“Think nothing of it. It’s my duty and my pleasure to take care of you. As long as you do your fair share and don’t slack around here.” My eyes widened and my mouth fell open, but he smirked, so I knew he was teasing.
“Why, you little scoundrel!” I hit him playfully in the arm.
“Speaking of work, I was wondering if you’d help me handle our help with the paperwork and seeing to their needs. Didn’t you help Ethan with that over at Wellington?”
I had told Jonas nearly everything that transpired while at Wellington, so apparently he remembered that I had helped Ethan out in that area. “Of course, I’d be happy to.”
“Thanks. I’ll show you where I keep everything, and you may organize it as you wish in here. I also have another question, Maddie, one I’ve been pondering all day. Do you think I should move out to the bachelor’s quarters? With Catherine being an unmarried woman and all, and with her young daughter, I don’t know that it’s appropriate for me to be living in the same house with them. What do you think?”
“Jonas, that’s a very noble notion, but this is your home, and I don’t think the master of the manor should live in the bachelor’s quarters. You belong here in the manor. Besides, since you moved up to the third floor, you’re not on the same floor as Catherine or Ginny, so I think that’s enough distance between you two to keep you chaste.”