He was my brother. And that meant more to me than I had realized when I was only half-formed.
I splashed water over my cheeks one more time and then rubbed a towel over my face and neck. I couldn’t do everything at once, but that didn’t stop the go, go, go push in the back of my mind. I needed to save my little brother. My baby brother.
I hadn’t had a brother in centuries.
I needed to help my baby cousin take back her throne. I wanted to see her find happiness the way I’d seen my other families married and happy and growing old together.
What’s more, I needed to finish this war, because I needed to go back to the family I’d left behind. I couldn’t leave them wondering if they’d ever see me again. If they hadn’t already given me up for dead, that is.
I hoped they had more faith in me than that.
I braced myself against the sink, closed my eyes, and then cleared my throat and straightened up. One thing at a time, Michelle, I told myself, though saying it to the girl in the mirror still felt foreign. And I wasn’t sure I would ever feel like that girl was entirely me.
When I finally came out of the bathroom again, my eyes weren’t quite as red, and I had a slightly better handle on my emotions. But when I walked into the living room to see my friends gathered there, I still felt like I was seeing them through entirely new eyes.
Elaine was sitting with Andrew, giving him her full attention throughout whatever conversation they were having. He had his arm draped across her shoulders, far more relaxed than he had been when they first started dating. And even though I had seen them together many times before, I couldn’t keep from thinking of the other young couples I’d seen giving each other those same looks.
They were so young.
I’d already met and fallen in love with my second family by the time Andrew was even born, and yet until this point, I’d thought of Elaine and Andrew as my guides to all things magical. And to some extent, I still felt that way, even if I knew I had learned plenty from my mother as well. She had been unorthodox; she had been willing to take risks with her magic that I knew for a fact Andrew and Elaine would balk at. But she hadn’t known the rules of magic and the way the magical society worked like Elaine and Andrew did. I still had so much to learn from them.
And yet they were so young, still trying to learn how to navigate the world. No wonder it had taken them this long to admit their feelings to each other.
I saw Tony talking with Theresa and recognized the look of longing behind his eyes. If he could have fallen to one knee right then and there with any confidence that she would take him back, he would have. And I wondered if he knew all she would ask was a promise to choose her over the Rendezvous. He and Theresa weren’t quite the children that Elaine and Andrew were, but that somehow made the pining worse.
And then, my gaze fell on Aaron and Izzy. They were the youngest—and yet they were as old as Elaine and Andrew in many respects, too.
But that was beside the point. The point was that as I looked into the living room at this group of people I loved, I wanted to protect them.
That desire, that need to protect them, felt strange. Until that point, I had only wanted to fight beside them. I hadn’t thought I was powerful or important enough to provide that protection, and I’d been alright with simply serving as their support. But now?
Now, I knew I could do something to make a difference. Sure, I wasn’t as powerful as Elaine or as well-trained as Andrew, but I did have centuries of experience looking out for my family. And that, in my opinion, counted as much as anything anyone else brought to the table.
I nodded to myself and sat down on the couch beside Aaron, who gave me a broad, encouraging smile that I couldn’t help returning.
“How you doing?” Aaron asked.
My smile widened. “Honestly?” I said. “This is the best I’ve felt in a long time.”
Chapter 10: Even Mercenaries Need Rescuing Sometimes
It felt strange to be packing up to leave already. I felt like we’d only just arrived—even if we’d been there for several weeks by that point. The shorter days and colder nights told me we’d been there long enough that the seasons had moved on without me. But because I’d spent most of my time in the village inside my own mind, I didn’t feel like I’d really been there.
Obviously, everyone else had already made their mark on the village. I could see Aaron in particular talking with several people there like they were old friends. But that really didn’t surprise me. This was the guy who had gotten kidnapped by the Rendezvous and knew more of their names within the first week we lived there than I did the entire time we’d been with that particular group of Rendezvous agents.
I couldn’t help but smile as Aaron shared a warm embrace with a pair of Halfsies that looked like a brother and sister. (I’d learned not to assume—they could have been father and daughter or mother and son, depending on how fast each of them aged.)
When I looked past Aaron and his new friends to Tony, though, I seriously considered claiming to have had a relapse. I could see him and Theresa talking quietly, and judging by the stricken expression painted over his face, the discussion wasn’t going well for him.
You idiot, I thought as I watched him. Stay here. She wants you to stay. You want to stay too!
You should tell him that, Lila suggested.
I think I might have hesitated before I had all my memories, but with centuries beneath my belt of watching so many nieces, nephews, cousins, and other family members flail around in the temporary insanity that came with falling in love, I guess I had less patience for people who danced around their feelings.
So instead of hesitating, I simply told Lila, Don’t think I won’t.
I waited until Theresa and Tony were done talking. (I guess I hoped they would work it out for themselves, but I could see the resignation in Theresa’s expression and the hurt and confusion in Tony’s that told me long before they parted ways that such hope was in vain.) Once Theresa walked past me to go to her sister, I went the opposite direction and pulled Tony aside, between the stilts of one of the houses, so we could speak in relative privacy.
“Don’t be this stupid,” I told him. I wasn’t going to sugarcoat it when we didn’t have much time. We were all packed up to leave—so if I didn’t get Tony to pull it together, we’d be back in the Northern Hemisphere before he’d even finished feeling sorry for himself.
Tony looked surprised and then angry as he pulled his arm out of my grasp. His cheery disposition had completely evaporated—and that more than anything else was an indication to me of how badly he needed to stay with Theresa. “Michelle—”
“You have a choice,” I said sharply, cutting him off before he could form any kind of argument. I’m not sure if he was reacting to my tone or to the look I gave him, but Tony stopped glaring and raised both eyebrows, a silent indication that he was listening. “You have this beautiful woman who loves you, and you’re madly in love with her. Anyone can see it. So why are you letting something as stupid as your job get in between you and happiness?”
Tony shook his head. “The war—”
“No.” I made a sharp motion with one hand. “Listen to me, Tony. You have a choice. Do you know what I’d give to be able to go back to the family I had before my father got involved in my life?” When Tony could only stare at me with his lips slightly parted, I knew he couldn’t argue that point. “If I go back to them, they might get slaughtered. Is there anything that pressing keeping you from your family?”
Tony swallowed. “Well, no.”
“Tony.” I met his gaze square on. “The Rendezvous can survive without one more soldier. Don’t you think King Peter would understand how important family is?”
“I swore my loyalty to the king,” Tony said, some of the heat from earlier finally creeping back into his tone. “That means something to me.”
“Didn’t you swear to be loyal to her when you married her?” I shot back, and Tony went back to looking
stunned and staying silent. I tipped my chin up. “And that’s the problem right there, Tony. I’d give anything to be with my family right now. Don’t you understand that?” I reached out to put my hand on Tony’s shoulder. “They probably think I’m dead. I can’t even talk to them. And here you are with your ex-wife, and all you can say is that you pledged your loyalty to a cause that won’t fall apart without you?”
The ghost of a smile graced Tony’s expression. “You really know how to build a guy up, don’t you, Michelle?”
I couldn’t possibly keep from smiling, even if I tried—Tony had a way of making everyone smile—though I kept his gaze with mine all the same. “I’m just saying, Tony. The Rendezvous isn’t so hard up that it can’t afford to spare you to fix your marriage.”
I could see him pausing to consider it, and I smiled to myself, sure that I had him convinced. But before Tony could admit how very right I was, Santo came bursting into the middle of the village, sounding an alarm: “Perimeter alert! There’s a mass of goblins to the east of us!”
As you can imagine, with that kind of immediate threat hanging over our heads, any talk of romance got pushed to the backburner.
“I thought the goblins knew better than to attack your borders,” Izzy said.
Santo shook his head. “They’re not massing this way,” he explained. “They’ve found someone.”
Andrew’s eyebrows shot up at that, and he turned toward Theresa, who was looking suddenly more businesslike than before. (And that was quite a feat, considering she had been visibly upset when she’d been talking to Tony.) “Are you missing any of your people?” Andrew asked Theresa.
Theresa’s eyes widened, and I could see her doing a quick head count. “Santo . . . ?” She turned toward her son to get a confirmation of the count she’d just done.
“I’m looking into it,” he promised. “But I don’t know of anyone passing the perimeter. We might be dealing with a newcomer.”
Theresa narrowed her eyes, and I saw her glance toward Tara before she spun to point at Andrew. “If you’ve brought down Royalists on my stronghold—”
“We didn’t bring anyone,” Andrew shot back, lifting his chin to meet her gaze squarely.
“We haven’t had any incidents before you came here.”
“We followed every protocol—”
“Your protocols. I’ve been protecting my people since before you were born!”
“Both of you stop,” Elaine said, stepping between Theresa and Andrew. She had a hand on the center of Andrew’s chest and held the other one, palm out, to Theresa. “We’ll know more when we find out what the goblins have found.”
Andrew glared past Elaine at Theresa for a moment longer—and Theresa gave it right back to him—before he finally nodded and reached for his sidearm. “Let’s go meet this intruder.”
“I’m coming with you,” Theresa insisted, her eyes flashing—literally. “This is my family. It’s my duty to protect them.”
(I might have imagined it, but I’m pretty sure I saw her look toward Tony when she said that. I wasn’t sure if that was because he was part of the family she wanted to protect or because she wanted him to understand what she thought of the word “duty”—or maybe some combination of the two.)
“Besides,” I put in with a small smirk Theresa’s way, trying to defuse the tension, “you’re the ones who know how to fight goblins. I’d feel better having you on my side anyway”
“Actually,” Izzy said, kicking one foot against the other, “I’ve been learning a little too.”
“We both have,” Aaron said, gesturing between himself and Izzy. “Gotta stay sharp, right? And seeing as you were off in your own mental world the whole time, we decided to make ourselves useful.”
I broke into a proud smile. I should have expected Izzy and Aaron to do something like that, but I had been so wrapped up in my own issues and memories I hadn’t paid any attention. Which was incredibly selfish of me, especially when I knew Izzy had to be interested in this place. Not only was it teeming with an intersection of humanity and magic that flew in the face of everything the Rendezvous agents said was true of magical culture but it was surrounded by other creatures like her.
The goblin masses alone would be enough to catch her attention—I knew she was worried she would turn into some kind of monster. I’d heard her telling Aaron as much at the airport—though I’d tried not to look like I had been accidentally eavesdropping. That seemed to happen to me a lot with this particular group; I couldn’t seem to find a place that I belonged where I wasn’t accidentally intruding on something.
“Stay close to me,” Theresa warned, one eyebrow raised. And even though Aaron and Izzy were the ones nodding their quick agreement, I was sure she meant to direct the command to Andrew. I couldn’t exactly blame her, seeing as my group of friends had been completely overrun by goblins when we first arrived, and Andrew was still too overconfident for anyone to believe he’d learned a lesson from that.
With that settled, we followed Theresa past the boundaries of the village and through the shielding and disguising spells. Santo walked side by side with his mother, pointing us on the right path until we were close enough to hear the commotion for ourselves. The high-pitched, excited chattering sent goosebumps down my arms, and I reached for the knife Andrew had given me back when I first joined the Rendezvous. He’d shown me how to sneak it past airport security, and I was glad I’d paid attention to that lesson. Somehow, I felt less nervous with something solid in my hands.
We couldn’t immediately see who our intruder was in the mass of goblins, but whoever it was, even if it turned out to be a Royalist spy, we had to get them out of there. No one deserved to go out like that, no matter who they were.
As soon as we got close enough, Elaine bent down to the ground, and the earth beneath our feet started to shake long before it reached the goblins. When the spell reached the hoard, the ground exploded, throwing goblins in every direction—and alerting them to our presence as well.
The goblins looked much stronger than they had before—especially those that had been in the center of the mass. Obviously, those were the ones who had gotten the biggest meal out of our visitor. They looked very nearly human—if not for the wild looks, the yellowish skin, and the pointed, bloody teeth.
I heard a sound of dismay and didn’t have to look to know Izzy had seen those almost-human goblins. Not that I could blame her. It was easier to think of goblins as monsters—as abstract nightmares that Izzy might maybe one day become—when they looked like monsters. Seeing them this way, looking so much like the people they used to be, had to be hard.
But I didn’t have time to come up with anything comforting to say to Izzy when the goblins had turned their attention to us and the threat we posed to their meal. Several of them let out low hisses, and others screeched out a sort of war cry before they massed once more, moving like their own sort of teeming, living organism as they rushed us.
This time, we had past experience to draw from. No one threw up a shield or used any magic that the goblins could feed off of—but the rules of engagement made it that much harder to get ahead when we were vastly outnumbered.
I found myself sticking close to Izzy and Aaron—and not to protect them. Actually, the opposite was true. They seemed to be almost as confident fighting the goblins as Theresa or Santo, utilizing a style I certainly had never seen that seemed to be more of a hit-and-run approach than anything else. Izzy had a long dagger in one hand, which she used in a spin, working with a backhanded technique to strike out against the goblin nearest her. She used the momentum of that strike to keep going, too, completing the spin so that her center of gravity was still low to the ground before she swept one leg out and knocked another goblin over.
“Nice work,” Aaron called out to Izzy.
I couldn’t help but smile at that. Aaron had always wanted me to be a superhero, but now, he could be his own superhero—and Izzy could be his heroic partner.
&nbs
p; Of course, I couldn’t get too caught up in what my friends were up to when the goblins got close enough that I felt long, sharp teeth dig into my arm. I let out a cry of surprise and pain before I grabbed the goblin by the back of the neck and pulled him off of me, kicking the center of his chest to knock him several steps back.
He grinned at me, his teeth stained with my blood, and I glared right back at him—and then reached out to the trees around us for some extra help. A moment later, that goblin and several others were hoisted into the air by branches and vines that tangled their arms and legs and kept them from even thinking about coming any closer to us.
I grinned at the trees and even rested my hand on one of the tall trunks. I could feel the life running through the forest around us, and somehow, with most of my memories back, I felt closer to it.
Maybe the elements up until that point had been more distant because they needed a whole soul to connect with and not a fractured one like mine had been. Or maybe I just needed more confidence in my abilities—and remembering centuries of being able to reach out to the world and life around me in my times of need certainly did a lot for my confidence.
I was able to get a few more goblins tangled in the trees, and between my trees and Elaine’s earthquakes and alliance with the ground—not to mention the whirl of motion that was Izzy and Aaron and the devastating team that Tony, Theresa, and Santo made—the goblins finally seemed to decide we weren’t worth the trouble. They’d already gotten a pretty solid meal out of our intruder, anyway.
Slowly, the goblins seemed to melt back into the forest, but we didn’t drop our guard for a second. Not until we could be absolutely sure the goblins wouldn’t come back.
Everyone was still watching the forest carefully for any sign of movement as Andrew made his way to the clearing, where the goblins’ victim was solidly unconscious and fairly bloody from bite marks and scratches. As I watched, Andrew crouched down beside the unconscious woman and gently turned her over so that she was no longer lying face-down in the mud. He still had his pistol in one hand, ready for another fight if need be, but when he saw her face, I could see a visible wilt to his shoulders.
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