‘Uh, Harry and I’ll wait outside—get out from under your feet.’
She raised an eyebrow, but he didn’t hang around to explain. He pushed out through the back door and tried to chase her scent out of his lungs with the clean, dry air. Sapphie, scented with her morning’s baking, smelt good enough to eat.
And he’d just discovered he was a very hungry man.
‘Gluttony is a deadly sin,’ he said to Harry, lowering his frame to the top step and jiggling his nephew on his knee.
‘I can make you a sandwich now if you want,’ Sapphie said from directly behind him.
He turned to find her standing at the screen door, partially obscured by its wire mesh. Her scent wafted out to him. ‘No, thanks, I’m fine.’
‘But you just said—’
‘I can wait till lunch.’ He worked on keeping his voice steady. ‘Something smells great, that’s all. What have you been baking?’
‘Nothing. I baked yesterday.’
He turned further around on the step. ‘Then what smells so good?’ The air smelt of vanilla, and a hint of nutmeg, and…caramel sauce?
‘Might be something I cut up for the lunches, or…’ She shrugged. ‘Search me.’
No, not a good idea. Definitely not a good idea.
‘Did you want a drink while you wait?’
‘Nah.’ He wanted to rid his senses of that scent, that was what he wanted to do. Then he remembered his manners. ‘Thank you for asking, though. Harry and me, we’re just fine—aren’t we, Harry?’
She disappeared. He wiped his forearm across his brow. He didn’t need a drink. He needed a cold shower.
He was ready for her when she came out with the saddlebags. He took them from her immediately. She glanced at the towel rolls he had tossed over one shoulder, and at Harry balanced on his hip. ‘What can I take?’
‘Nothing. It’s all good.’
‘But you’re carrying everything.’
‘So?’
He couldn’t help it. He wanted to make things easy for her, protect her. After everything she’d been through she deserved that much.
She disappeared back inside the house and emerged a moment later carrying the basket that held the men’s lunches. He opened his mouth to tell her not to worry, that someone would be along to collect it, but before he could she said, ‘Let me feel useful. It’ll save someone the trip across.’
If he’d had a free arm he’d have slung it across her shoulders. On reflection, it was probably just as well he didn’t.
Sapphie’s grin when they wound down through the shallow gully to emerge at the waterhole half an hour later told him this picnic was a good idea. A very good idea. Even if he had spent most of the last thirty minutes doing his level best not to stare at her and that very good seat of hers.
Stare? Don’t you mean ogle?
He swallowed. His hand clenched about the reins. He had no intention of laying so much as a finger on the generous and delectable Sapphie. He might not be able to take a cold shower, but there was an entire waterhole full of cold water at his disposal.
‘Swim first, lunch later.’
‘But I don’t have a swimsuit,’ Sapphie wailed.
He pointed to the towel roll attached to the back of her saddle. ‘One of Lacey’s old swimsuits is in there.’
She dismounted and retrieved the towel roll. She’d have unhitched the saddlebags too, but Liam said, ‘I’ll take care of those.’
He handed Harry down to her, and it suddenly hit him that Sapphie was used to doing everything for herself—not just most things, but everything. The thought slid in under his skin and niggled at him.
‘What’s wrong?’
He glanced down to find her holding Harry close. He cleared his face immediately. ‘Sorry, just remembered something about the accounts.’
‘Bad?’
‘Nothing I can’t sort.’
Liar! He couldn’t help Sapphie, or give her what she needed—not in any real way. It was she who’d helped him. It didn’t stop him from wanting to look after her.
With a superhuman effort, he kept his face scowl-free. ‘I’m going to unsaddle the horses and tether them over here. Why don’t you set us up on the strip of sand over there?’
With a shrug, she ambled off. Liam watched the rhythmic sway of her hips until a flock of northern rosellas dipped through the gully, their blue and black feathers flashing against the landscape. With a smothered oath he leapt off Jasper and led both horses to a grassy spot, and gave himself a serious talking-to before rejoining Sapphie and Harry.
He found them sitting on a beach towel, Sapphie surveying the swimsuit he’d given her. ‘It is okay, isn’t it?’ he said, suddenly unsure.
‘It’s pink!’
His lips twitched. ‘Lacey’s a girly-girl.’
‘A girly-girl? Growing up out here?’
He lowered himself down to the towel beside her. Her scent hit him again. ‘Lacey is a first-class cattle breeder. She’s capable and independent. But she’s a girly-girl. She likes jewellery and trinkets and baubles—things that twinkle and glitter. She likes clothes with lace and frills and tassels. And her favourite colour is pink.’
It occurred to him that he’d never seen Sapphie wear pink. With an effort of will, he kept a straight face. ‘I didn’t think you’d care about the colour.’
Her chin shot up. ‘Of course I don’t! That’d be silly. Especially way out here in the Never-Never. But…’
‘But?’
‘It’s a bikini! I never wear bikinis.’
He blinked. He hadn’t given that a second thought. He’d just grabbed the first of Lacey’s swimsuits that had come to hand. ‘Why not? Sapphie, you sure don’t need to be self-conscious. You have a great figure, and you’d look fabulous in—’
He broke off, suddenly remembering what had happened to her, and he knew he couldn’t even begin to understand what that attack had done to her. He dragged a hand down his face and recalled those baggy sweaters. He might not know how it felt, but he could do his best to make her feel safe now.
He pulled his hand from his face to take the swimsuit from her. He surveyed the top, and then the bottoms. ‘You know, most women’s basketball teams wear something similar to this.’
She opened her mouth, then closed it again to stare at the two strips of fabric he held.
‘This isn’t one of those skimpy numbers,’ he continued. ‘This is a crop top. And these…’He held up the bottoms and tried not to imagine Sapphie’s neat little behind filling them out. ‘If these were black nylon instead of pink Lycra they’d be the same as those pants Lacey used to wear for gymnastics at boarding school.’
Sapphie smiled at that. ‘I had to wear those too.’
‘And, apart from all that, Harry and I don’t count.’
She eased back to stare at him. ‘What on earth are you talking about?’
‘As an audience—me and Harry don’t count. Harry is your nephew, and he’s not going to care what kind of swimsuit you wear. And I’m Harry’s uncle, which practically makes you and me family. Where swimsuits are concerned, family don’t count.’
Her eyes narrowed, and he wondered if she’d seen the flaw of that particular argument, so he rushed on with, ‘But if you really don’t want to wear it then perhaps you could put my T-shirt on over the top.’ He flicked the sleeve. ‘Once this old thing is wet it’ll practically hang down to your knees.’
She opened her mouth, but he leant across and pressed a finger to her lips. ‘Sapphie, do whatever makes you feel most comfortable. Harry and me, we don’t care what you wear—the decision is up to you. Now, I’m going to go and get into my board shorts behind those bushes over there.’ He leapt up and made for said bushes. ‘No peeking.’
‘I’d do no such thing!’
She swung away with a gasp, and he figured she’d just remembered the way she’d stared at him when he’d emerged from his shower that day. The memory made him grin.
Her cheeks were p
ink when he returned, but he made no comment. He dropped his shirt beside her, picked up Harry, and made for the cool clear water.
He and Harry both gasped as the water closed over them. They splashed and laughed and swam, and Liam did his best not to notice what Sapphie did on shore—though he clocked the exact moment she rose and headed towards the bushes to change.
He deliberately turned his back. The temptation to catch even the tiniest glimpse of her naked was too great a temptation to toy with.
Harry loved the water, and he provided an entertaining distraction, but Liam could pick out the sounds as Sapphie moved back towards them—the shaking out of a towel, the pebbles shifting beneath her feet as she made her way down to the water. He told himself he would only turn around if she gave him a sign.
‘How’s the water?’
He turned around. She wore his shirt. He tried to hide his disappointment. ‘The water is great.’
Her eyes widened when her feet first touched the water.
‘See, I told you,’ he called out. His shirt came to the tops of her thighs. She looked cute, coltish…sweet. ‘Dare you to dive right in.’
And she did. Just like that. She emerged not too far from him and directed a jet of water straight at him. Harry chortled as if it was the funniest thing he’d ever seen. Liam splashed her back. Harry chortled more and splashed everyone.
Liam couldn’t remember the last time he’d had so much fun. The three of them dived and frolicked and laughed. Harry’s laughter, Sapphie’s laughter, loosened something inside him, making it easier and easier for him to laugh too.
At one point Sapphie eased back. ‘You know, it’s actually hideously uncomfortable swimming in your T-shirt, Liam. No offence.’
‘None taken.’
His tongue cleaved to the roof of his mouth when she stood up in waist-high water, peeled his shirt off over her head and spread it out on a nearby rock to dry. She wore the pink bikini beneath it and she was…beautiful!
With a grin she dived under the water, as if to test her newfound sense of freedom. She surfaced right beside him. ‘Thank you for lending me your shirt,’ she whispered. ‘It helped me get used to the idea of this.’ She touched the shoulder strap of the bikini top.
‘Any time,’ he managed. He reached out, touched the backs of his fingers to her cheek. ‘I just want you to feel safe here, Sapphie.’
‘I know. And I do. Thank you.’
Her eyes darkened and he snatched his hand back. ‘Right! Time to teach Harry to swim.’
Sapphie called a halt to the fun and games a little while later. ‘Enough!’ She laughed. ‘It has to be time for lunch. I’m famished.’
So was he.
He followed her out of the water and tried to disguise his pang when she pulled on her T-shirt and planted her hat on her head. She dried Harry off, then pulled his little shirt and tiny shorts on too.
‘I know we have a shady spot here.’ She glanced at the rocks to their left, whose overhang protected them from the sun. ‘But it’s never wise to underestimate the sun at this time of the day. Harry and I aren’t used to it being so warm at this time of the year yet.’ She glanced across at his shirt, drying on a rock. ‘I’m sorry about—’
‘It’s practically dry.’ He dragged it on over his head. He wanted her to feel safe.
Being clothed was safer for both of them. Though he couldn’t help noticing her T-shirt dropped only an inch or so below her waist, leaving the honeyed flesh of her glorious legs exposed. Lovely legs that—
He dragged his gaze away. Ogling her was not a method designed to make her feel safe.
Harry grabbed his bottle the moment Sapphie produced it, curled up on the towel between them, and with a contented sigh closed his eyes.
Sapphie leant across and brushed the baby curls back from his face. ‘He’s had so much fun.’ She glanced up at Liam, her smile warm, as if he were the sole reason for Harry’s fun. ‘I have too.’
It would be so easy to lean across and kiss her now.
He edged back. ‘That makes three of us.’
She touched a hand to her face. She frowned, then swallowed. ‘It’s going to be a little awkward trying to eat around Harry like this. Do you think you could move him more into the shade just there?’
Liam did, and Sapphie unpacked sandwiches and fruit, thick slices of cake and a Thermos of tea. They ate in silence—not a fraught silence, but a companionable, contented quiet.
At least it wasn’t fraught as long as he didn’t glance across at her and her lovely and far too tempting curves. He concentrated on staring out at the landscape—at the sandstone and granite rocks that enclosed the waterhole and rose at its far end to a sheer cliff, where the waterfall descended in a long, easy flow. The contrasting red and grey of the rocks, the washed-out white-gold of nearby tussocks of grass and the clear deep blue of the sky above. Its peace and grandeur stole into his soul. Combined with the scent of the woman beside him, it turned this place into paradise.
With a contented sigh, he eased down until he lay on his back. ‘They were great sandwiches, Sapphie. And great tea and cake.’
‘Ooh, and a great idea,’ she returned, settling back on her towel too. The tiniest of sighs escaped her. ‘This place is heavenly.’
‘Yep.’
They were quiet for a bit, listening to the breeze ruffle the grass and the rhythmic splash of the waterfall, the occasional cry of a bird.
He turned to glance at her profile. ‘Sapphie?’
‘Hmm?’
She didn’t turn to meet his gaze. Her lips were far too full and tempting in profile. He wanted to taste them. He dragged his head back round until he was staring heavenwards again.
Her lips are off-limits.
He ground his eyes shut for a moment. ‘Do you know there’s only three days left on our agreement?’
‘Uh-huh.’
He couldn’t tell anything from her tone. He cursed himself for starting this conversation while they were flat on their backs and staring up at the sky. He wanted to see her face. He wanted to know what she was thinking.
There was only one way to know that for sure…
He pulled in a breath. ‘I need to know what you’re thinking. Where Harry’s concerned, that is.’ He swallowed. His mouth had gone strangely dry. ‘Are you for me or against me?’
She didn’t say anything for a long moment, then, ‘You remember the night before last, when you put Harry to bed on your own?’
He’d asked if he could. He’d wanted to know if Harry would settle for him. He’d wanted to sing Lucas’s song to him again.
‘I didn’t stay in the kitchen. I crept down the hallway and stood outside the bedroom door to listen.’
He frowned at the sky. ‘Why?’ He’d thought she trusted him.
‘Curiosity, I guess. And…and I was feeling a bit left out.’
He found her hand and squeezed it. ‘You should’ve joined us.’
‘No, it’s right that you and Harry should have your own time together.’ She paused. ‘You talked to him about Lucas.’
He dropped her hand. He wanted to get up and walk away. He wanted to stay where he was. He didn’t know what he wanted to do.
She slipped her hand back inside his and squeezed. He let out the breath he held. ‘Harry is going to want to know all about his dad when he’s growing up. I thought I’d try it out and see if I could do it, talk about Lucas.’
‘I thought you did a wonderful job.’
Her words warmed him. ‘Ever since the night you and I talked about him I—’
Her hand tightened in his. ‘You what?’
He glared at the sky. ‘Do you know how angry I am with him for giving up? For not fighting on a little bit longer?’
‘Oh, Liam.’
‘I blamed myself for his death because it was easier than coming to terms with the truth—that he left us! He made the decision to leave us.’
He was suddenly glad they were lying on their backs and s
taring up at the sky. Beside him he could sense Sapphie fighting her desire to sit up. He squeezed her hand, silently asking her to stay where she was. At the moment, if she offered him any physical comfort he’d take it—all of it. And they’d both regret it afterwards.
After a moment she squeezed his hand back and remained where she was. ‘He must’ve been in a lot of pain, a lot of…despair.’
‘I know that too.’
He sensed she’d turned her head to look at him. ‘Are you still angry with him?’
‘A little,’ he admitted. But it had grown less and less the more he talked about Lucas. His lips twisted. ‘I had an epiphany the other night. You want to hear about it?’
‘Sure.’
‘I suddenly realised I was never going to stop missing him. Startling revelation, huh?’
She didn’t laugh, even though he’d deliberately made fun of himself. ‘You don’t realise that stuff until you lose someone close to you,’ she murmured.
He thought about her mother, her sister. It occurred to him that he’d always known she’d understand. ‘I also realised I could make the decision to miss him in a good way, or miss him in a bad way.’ He turned his head to meet her gaze. ‘I’ve decided to miss him in a good way. For Harry’s sake. And my own.’
Her smile was as dazzling as sheet lightning that could illuminate an entire plain in the darkness of a storm. ‘I’m glad.’
‘I want to be as good a father as I can to Harry. I need to know if you think I can do that.’
She pursed her lips and surveyed him. His heart started to pound. He didn’t know if she was teasing him or not.
‘You want to know something? These days it doesn’t actually look as if it hurts you to smile. And you know what else? I believe I even heard you laugh earlier today.’
She was teasing him!
A grin grew inside him. ‘Yeah, well, I’m finding babies can have that kind of effect on a person.’ But it was more than that. When Sapphie was around she made it easy to laugh.
The Cattleman, The Baby and Me Page 13