‘God I’m mortified!’ Grace said, laughing. ‘What must those locals think of us?’
‘I don’t think they’ve ever seen anybody like Gerry before, that’s for certain!’ Tara answered. ‘Did you see their faces when he got up and started singing Gloria Gaynor’s I Will Survive?’
‘Tara, this weekend will go down as one of the funniest times I’ve ever had in my life!’ Grace said. ‘Thank you so much.’
‘It’s a pleasure. So then, what has you up so early?’ Tara asked. ‘Truth now, Grace. What’s up?’
‘Don’t look so worried. Nothing’s up. I just couldn’t sleep, so decided a walk would be good. I needed to clear my head; it was feeling a little bit battered this morning!’
‘We’re getting old Grace; ten years ago we’d have done last night and been ready for action again this morning!’ Tara declared.
‘Speak for yourself, Cousin,’ Grace retorted. ‘Fancy a coffee?’
Walking back to the B&B, they went into the breakfast room and grabbed a table. Mrs Dunleavy, the owner, came over to take their order.
‘Can we just have coffee to start with please Mrs Dunleavy?’ Tara asked with a smile. ‘Then maybe we can work our way up to breakfast later on?’
‘No bother at all,’ she answered. ‘I’m sure you’ll need a good strong pot of coffee after all your shenanigans last night!’
‘Oh no, I’m so sorry, did we wake anyone up?’ Grace asked worriedly.
‘No, not at all,’ Mrs Dunleavy answered with a smile. ‘I meant down at the pub. I heard you guys were the life and soul of the party down there.’
Tara and Grace started to giggle as they realised they were the talk of the village.
‘We’ve still got it in us to cause a stir all the same!’ Grace said with a grin at her cousin. ‘Despite our old age!’
‘You’re a bit pale, Grace. How you feeling these days?’ Tara asked with concern.
‘I think even Judith Chalmers would be pale this morning after the amount of alcohol we chucked away last night,’ Grace answered with a smile. ‘I’m fine honest injuns. Just feeling a bit tired.’
‘You all set for your next check-up?’ Tara asked.
‘Yep, I’m in next week. To be honest Tara, I’m a little scared,’ Grace admitted.
‘Of course you are, pet. You wouldn’t be normal if you didn’t feel apprehensive about the results. But you’ve got to keep positive. I’m sure it will be fine,’ Tara said firmly.
‘What if it’s not, Tara? What if the cancer’s back?’ Grace whispered.
‘Then you get your chemo again and beat the fucker one more time. And I’ll be right there beside you, willing you on,’ Tara declared firmly.
‘Thanks Tara. Anyhow, enough about me. How are things with you and Sean? We haven’t seen much of you both in the last couple of weeks.’
‘Oh we’re grand, Grace. Just lying low for a bit that’s all. You know how it is,’ Tara said.
But Grace could tell that Tara was hiding something. ‘Tara, I’ve had to keep some secrets in my time, so I think I can safely say when someone’s hiding something. What’s going on with you, really?’
‘No flies on you are there!’ Tara said ruefully, pausing to pour a cup of coffee for both of them.
‘Righto then, it’s no biggy really, but Sean and I have been trying to have a baby.’
Grace jumped up and leaned over to give Tara a big hug, saying ‘That’s fantastic! A cousin for Jack at last! When are you due?’
‘Not so fast Michael Schumacher,’ Tara said with a sigh. ‘Do you really think I’d have been chucking back Sambucas if I was preggers?’
‘Oh right, of course not Tara. Sorry. Just got carried away for a minute. Go on.’
‘We’ve been trying for over a year now.’ Seeing Grace’s raised eyebrows, Tara guessed what she was thinking, ‘I never said anything to you, because you were going through chemotherapy at the time. It didn’t seem appropriate.’
‘Oh Tara, of course it would have been appropriate. You must never keep anything from me, no matter what’s going on in my life. Promise me,’ Grace implored.
‘Well, there’s nothing to tell, Grace. We decided we were ready for a family a year ago; Sean’s career is established and mine too. We’ve a few euros saved, so we can afford for me to take some time off work, maybe work part-time only. We had it all worked out. But nothing’s been happening. Despite all our best efforts. So we went to see a specialist a month ago and he ran some tests. Good news, there are no medical reasons as to why we are not conceiving. But get this; he said that it could take some time for me to conceive because of my age,’ Tara said ruefully.
‘You’ve got to be joking,’ Grace said with shock. ‘You’re only thirty two, there’s women having kids who are nearly sixty for God’s sake.’ She could remember reading something on Facebook about that.
‘I know, but according to him, that’s old for a first-time mum. It’s so unfair. I’ve spent the last fourteen years using contraception to make sure I don’t bring a kid into the world without the right set-up, husband, money, home, and then when we get all our i’s dotted and t’s crossed, we’re told that we left it too bloody late.’ She took a gulp of her coffee.
Grace felt so bad for her cousin. She could tell that this was something that she wanted desperately. ‘I don’t believe for one second that you’ve left it too late, Tara. What advice did the doctor give you both?’
‘God it’s like a military operation! We’ve been working to a schedule, making sure we have sex at the right time, at the right temperature. Sean is wearing boxers, letting it all hang out!’ Tara finished with the start of a smile.
‘As Gerry would say Tara – share don’t scare!’ Grace said with a laugh. Then grabbing her friend’s hand tightly, she continued, ‘It will happen I’m sure it will. If anyone should have kids, it’s you and Sean. You are both so good with Jack. You’ll be amazing parents.’
‘Thanks, Grace. I appreciate that. It’s just so disappointing when each month comes and my fucking period arrives like clockwork. Having spent years thanking the heavens when it arrived, it’s been a whole different ball game lately! That’s why I went to ground the past couple of weeks. I really thought we’d done it this month. I was a couple of days late and had convinced myself that it had happened. But then ten days ago, bingo, there’s my fucking period,’ Tara said, her voice wobbling with emotion.
‘It must be so disappointing for you both. How’s Sean doing?’ Grace asked with concern.
‘He’s great, so great that he’s doing my head in. He keeps coming up with these stupid platitudes and stories about patients he’s met who’ve tried for kids. I swear if I have to listen to one more story of “there was this lady who was trying to have a baby for six years, had ten miscarriages, then got pregnant and now has twenty kids,” I’ll do time!’
‘Poor cow,’ Grace said dryly. ‘Twenty kids, ouch.’ Then the two girls started to laugh.
‘And before you start telling me how lucky I am to have Sean, and how he means well, I know all that Grace. It’s just sometimes I wish he’d tell me what he really thinks and show me how disappointed he is too, not try to be super husband all the time,’ Tara added. ‘I know how upset he is too. I catch him looking at me sometimes so sorrowfully.’
‘Well, you’ve got to try to keep positive and look on the bright side,’ Grace said, pouring more coffee. ‘At least you’re having regular sex!’
‘God you have a one-track mind!’ Tara replied, giggling.
With that, Gerry and Abby walked into the breakfast room. Gerry wearing big sunglasses, holding Abby’s arm for dear life as he manoeuvred his way through the tables like they were landmines.
‘Feeling delicate?’ Tara asked.
‘Darling, I’ll be as much use as a chocolate teapot today,’ he replied.
Abby as usual who never suffered with hangovers declared she was starving and quickly ordered a fry-up for everyone.
�
��How can you even think about food? Do you think I could actually eat anything in my condition?’ Gerry asked.
‘Your breakfast isn’t for you silly!’ Abby answered. ‘It’s for me!’
‘You just watch it, Abby Nolan,’ Tara said, waving a finger in her friend’s face. ‘When you get to forty, all this food is going to catch up with you! One day you’ll wake up and be a size 20, and I for one will be cheering in the wings!!’
Sticking her tongue out at Tara, Abby poured a cup of coffee, spooning three sugars in just to wind her friend up!
Chapter Thirty Six
Grace was sitting in Dr Kennedy’s office waiting room, feeling like she was getting ready to be executed. She was terrified. Having been cancer-free for six months, the thought of hearing the results of her latest check-up were unbearable. She was on her own, having chosen not to tell Liam, or indeed any of the others, about this appointment. They thought it was tomorrow. They would have all fussed so much, and with her nerves in shreds already, she didn’t think she could have coped with their worries too. It was easier this way.
She noticed that there were fresh flowers on the countertop of the reception area. This was a distinct improvement to her previous visit to see Dr Kennedy; she decided it was a good sign. Then it was time. Dr Kennedy was beckoning her into his office with a big smile. Grace couldn’t decide whether the smile was a smile of victory – i.e. her being still in remission – or one of condolence – i.e. ding ding, round 2. Taking a seat (still those uncomfortable seats – damn it, a bad sign), Grace took a deep breath and asked her consultant what the results showed.
‘How have you been feeling lately?’ Dr Kennedy asked gently.
‘Great, fantastic, in fact never better,’ Grace babbled quickly.
Dr Kennedy raised his eyebrows slightly. ‘You decided to come on your own today, Grace. No Liam or Sean waiting outside?’
‘No Dr Kennedy, I’m a big girl. All on my own. Please, can we skip the pleasantries? You are making me nervous. Just tell me, am I okay?’
‘I’m terribly sorry, Grace. I’m afraid the AML is back. Quite aggressively in fact.’
Ding ding, round 2 it was. Why wasn’t she surprised? Because somehow she knew in the back of her mind that the poison was back in her veins. She could feel it. She had just pretended that all was well.
‘Grace, have you any questions for me?’ Dr Kennedy said.
‘What’s the prognosis?’ Grace asked firmly. She glanced up at the ceiling and thought that this time she’d better keep her feet firmly on the ground. She’d beaten this once before, she’d do it a second time.
‘I’m afraid it’s the same as last time. We’ll start chemotherapy immediately, another course of six treatments. Then we’ll review the situation.’
‘Well I’m afraid that it’s impossible for me to start chemo immediately,’ Grace told the doctor. ‘I’m getting married next week. Then I’m going to Florida with my husband and son for two weeks.’
Dr Kennedy ran his hand through his balding head and sighed. This was never an easy task for him, talking to patients about their cancer. But this seemed particularly terrible, a young woman on the brink of marriage. ‘Grace, my dear, I strongly advise that you postpone your wedding and we start the chemotherapy immediately. The earlier we start working on this the better. This is serious.’
Grace got up and walked to the window of the consultant’s room and looked out at the wet and grey December day. Of course it was raining. Turning back to Dr Kennedy, she said quietly but very strongly, ‘I’m sorry Dr Kennedy, I really am. But there is no way I’m going to miss my wedding. I’m getting married on December 24th, I’m going to spend Christmas Day with my family and loved ones, and then I’m flying to Disneyland to introduce Mickey Mouse to my son on St. Stephen’s Day. There is absolutely nothing you can say to alter these plans.’
‘Okay Grace. I can see you have made your mind up. I’ll agree to defer the treatment by two weeks. But I want you to cut your honeymoon in half and return here for treatment the beginning of January. No buts, Grace. I’m sure Liam will agree to a shorter honeymoon when you explain what’s going on.’
Grace nodded silently. She got up and shook Dr Kennedy’s hand wordlessly. Walking to the door of the consultant’s office, she turned back to the doctor and said quietly, ‘You’ve got to help me beat this Dr Kennedy. I’ve too much living to do yet. You hear me?’
Dr Kennedy smiled, ‘I’ll see you on the 3rd January, Grace. I’ll be in touch.’
Grace got a taxi home in a blur. The busy Dublin traffic that usually drove her to distraction, this time she didn’t even notice. She was grateful for the delay on the M50. It gave her time to think. By the time she got home she knew what she was going to do. She wouldn’t tell Liam, or in fact any of her friends, about her cancer’s reappearance. What was the point in worrying them for two weeks, when they could do nothing? She’d ring the travel agents and change their flights home for a week earlier. She did toy with the idea of only changing her flight, but knew she’d never in a million years get away with leaving Liam behind in the US while she flew home for chemo. Plus in all honesty, she knew she wouldn’t have the strength to go through it alone. She’d keep her news to herself and then towards the end of the first week, tell Liam the truth. That way her news wouldn’t ruin his wedding day or his honeymoon. Her decision made, she felt better. Time to make some phone calls.
Chapter Thirty Seven
‘Darling, wake up, it’s your wedding day!’ Gerry said, blowing a kiss at Grace as he opened the curtains in her room.
‘What time is it? Grace answered sleepily.
‘8 a.m. princess. Time to get up. I’ve ordered breakfast for us all; it will be here any minute,’ Gerry replied.
Grace got up and realised she was feeling pretty good. She’d been fighting tiredness and aches in what felt like her whole body for the past week, but this morning, ache-free! Walking over to Gerry, she grabbed his hand and pulled him in close for a hug. ‘I love you, Gerry,’ Grace whispered in his ear.
‘Darling. I love you too,’ Gerry said with a smile, kissing her.
‘Thank you, Gerry.’
‘For what my darling?’ Gerry asked.
‘For my wedding,’ Grace replied.
‘But you haven’t seen it yet, darling. I just hope that you like it,’ Gerry answered.
‘Oh but I know it will be perfect. Just perfect. Because you organised it. So thank you. Just in case I forget to tell you later on.’
Gerry gently kissed his friend on her forehead and led Grace to the dining area of the suite they were staying in. ‘Sit, I’m going to get breakfast,’ he told Grace with a barely stifled sob.
With that, Tara and Abby walked in. ‘What’s going on with Franc? Someone mix up his seating arrangement?’ Tara said with a laugh. ‘He’s gone running into the bathroom crying!’ Then Tara noticed tears in Grace’s eyes too. ‘Oh Lord, not you too! It’s not even dawn yet and we’ve started on the Kleenex!’
Abby and Tara both pulled Grace into what was going to become one of many group hugs of the day. Gerry came back into the room just as the champagne breakfast arrived.
‘This is what I call breakfast!’ Tara said as she gulped a glass of Bellini. ‘A girl could get used to this!’
Having eaten a good breakfast, Gerry then shooed the girls towards their respective bathrooms for showers. ‘Hairdressers will be here at 9.30. No time to waste!’
Knowing it was far easier to agree than argue, they all did as they were told. Grace was having a hairpiece fitted by the hairdresser. Her hair had started to grow back but was still quite short. She didn’t feel herself without her flowing locks, so Gerry had organised a hairpiece which matched her strawberry blonde curls perfectly. She was going to wear her hair in a low ponytail tied loosely at the nape of her neck. She had decided against a veil but had tiny white rosebuds that were going to be placed randomly throughout her crown.
The morning passed in what
can only be called organised chaos, with Gerry having fits of Franc every hour or so. By one o’clock, Tara and Abby were dressed and looking beautiful. They were both wearing black evening dresses in raw silk. Tara’s was a halter-neck design, with Abby’s having little shoestring straps. Both had white fur stoles to wear over their shoulders. The hairdresser had swept up both of the girls’ hair in chignons. Simple diamond stud earrings and a matching diamond choker finished their look off. These were a gift from Grace and Liam.
‘Darlings, I have never seen you both look so lovely. Quite lovely. Now sit, while I put the finishing touches to Grace.’
He walked into Grace’s dressing room and literally gasped when he saw her. She turned to face him and Gerry brushed away a tear as he took in the beautiful bride. Grace looked radiant. She was wearing a Vera Wang gown, which in its simplicity seemed to mould itself to Grace’s figure. The gown was pure white, with a tight strapless bodice. The skirt of the dress fell in soft drapes around her slim figure with a long train flowing out from behind. The exquisite detail of the design was amazing.
‘Will I do?’ Grace asked with a catch in her voice.
‘Oh, darling. Dump Liam, marry me! It’s worked. You turned me! I swear I actually felt something stir down here!’ Gerry said, pointing downwards.
Grace burst into laughter. She had needed Gerry to say something to relax her and he had. She knew today was going to be emotional, but she was determined not to spend the whole day crying! Walking into the main suite, Grace gave the girls a twirl. Despite shouts from Gerry of ‘no tears girls, no tears’, Abby and Tara immediately burst into tears when they saw their friend. Knowing he was fighting a losing battle, Gerry thought what the hell, and thanked God for waterproof mascara! After ten minutes of the girls having their make-up reapplied, it was time to leave. Gerry placed a long white fur cape around Grace’s shoulders.
‘Darling, you are like a magnificent snow queen. A masterpiece!’ Gerry declared. ‘Are you ready, darling?’
Beyond Grace's Rainbow: HarperImpulse Contemporary Romance Page 23