by Rye Hart
“You have?” I frowned and looked down at my phone. I’d been so distracted by my own issues that I hadn’t bothered to check my phone. Sure enough, I had four missed calls. “Sorry about that. I’ve just been out of it today. What’s up?”
“Well,” he said, glancing nervously at Stephanie. She got the hint and turned around, walking quickly to the other end of the bar. “I was worried about you. How are you feeling?”
“I’m okay,” I said. “Really. I feel fine today.”
“Good.” Caleb sighed, clearly relieved. “I also wanted to tell you that I found out what happened to my pills.”
“You did?”
“My mom threw them away,” he said. “She was at my place cleaning, and she didn’t realize what they were, so she tossed them.”
“How did she not know what they were?” I asked suspiciously.
“I put them in my old matchbox container so I wouldn’t lose them again,” he said. “She thought it was junk.”
I stared into his eyes while he spoke and I believed him. It hit me suddenly, but once it did, I couldn’t believe I’d ever doubted him. Of course he was telling the truth. Of course he just lost them. Caleb wasn’t the same messed up kid he used to be. He was a man now. A gorgeous, sexy, intelligent man who I could trust.
“I’m sorry I doubted you,” I said.
“With everything you have going on, it’s understandable.”
He smiled, and I felt all the tension leave my shoulders. My stomach tightened, and my body leaned into his. We kissed, and it sent desire shooting through my body. I moaned against his lips.
“Let’s get out of here,” I said.
I waved goodbye to Stephanie and let Caleb lead me outside.
***
Caleb was gentle with me that night. It was almost like he was afraid to hurt me. He kissed me softly, barely pressing his lips against mine. When he took off my clothes, his fingers were light against my skin. They sent chills down my spine, but I wanted more. I wanted the same rough desperation we’d shared before.
“Stop it,” I said as he slowly kissed my breasts, lightly tracing my nipples with his tongue.
“What?” he asked.
“You don’t have to be careful with me,” I said. “I won’t break.”
“It’s hard to admit, but I’m scared,” he said. He sighed and sat up, his eyes meeting mine.
“You won’t hurt me,” I said. “And right now all I want is to be distracted.”
Caleb kissed my lips, and this time, he kissed me roughly. I tangled my fingers in his hair and held him there, our tongues lashing against each other. My juices flowed between my legs as he rubbed his hips against mine. I wrapped my legs around him and pulled him close, shoving my wet pussy against his cock.
He groaned and sat up, rolling me onto my side and lying down behind me. His hands roamed freely over my body while he positioned himself at my entrance. He lifted my top leg and threw it over him. In one motion, he was inside of me.
“God,” I muttered. “I needed this.”
“Me too,” Caleb grunted and thrust his hips harder.
I craned my neck around to kiss him while he gripped my tits in his hand. He squeezed and thrust inside of me, rotating his hips just right to hit the perfect spot. His fingers slid down my stomach to my clit.
“Oh my God,” I breathed as he slowly circled my clit.
“You feel incredible,” he said. His voice was rough, deeper than I’d ever heard it.
I pushed my ass back against him while he took me hard and slow. He wasn’t in a rush. I could tell from the way he moved that he was still afraid to hurt me, but his thrusts were deep and insistent. They sent waves of pleasure washing over my body and soon, I was bordering on the edge of an amazing orgasm.
“I’m so close,” I said. “Don’t stop.”
“Never.”
Caleb pushed himself harder inside of me, his fingers speeding up over my clit. I moaned and gasped, feeling every inch of him. I reached up to wrap my arm around his neck while he kissed my shoulder.
Our bodies melted together. I came slowly, the orgasm building more and more with each thrust. Caleb groaned when he felt my pussy tighten around him, and he moved even slower, dragging out my pleasure until I couldn’t breathe.
His own release came soon after, leaving him panting and sweaty. We stayed frozen in that position, neither of us ready to move.
When we finally did, Caleb didn’t let me go far. He rolled onto his back and held me against his chest, placing gentle kisses along my hairline.
“We’re going to get through this,” he said softly. “You’re going to get better.”
His confidence was enough to keep me happy through the night, but deep down, I was scared he was wrong.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE - CALEB
My next PT session felt more like a workout than physical therapy. Tara ran me through the usual paces: stretches, walking, and weights. She pushed me harder this time, making me extend my leg further and lift heavier weights. I loved it. For the first time since the fire, I felt like myself again. I felt strong.
“I think you’ll be done soon,” Tara said. “Dr. McGee and I have been talking. We’re in agreement that your progress is amazing.”
“I’m kicking ass,” I said, grinning.
“You’re doing well,” she said firmly.
“Just say it.” I teased. “Just once.”
She rolled her eyes. “Fine,” she said. “You’re kicking ass.”
“That’s right!” I cheered. “God, it feels so fucking good to walk without those damn crutches. I can’t even tell you how much I hated them.”
“I know.” Tara laughed. “You never shut up about it.”
I walked over to my usual chair and sat down. As I toweled off my face, Tara stood beside me and looked around the room. Her next patient would be there soon, and I knew she didn’t want anyone to see us together. But as I stared at her body, I couldn’t control myself.
“Come here,” I said, my voice low and husky. I pulled her into my lap and claimed her lips for a kiss. She pulled away quickly, her eyes darting from side to side. “No one’s here. Relax.”
“This is my job,” she said. “I can’t do this here.”
“Shut up,” I said firmly. “Stop thinking so damn much.”
“So you want me to be stupid?” Tara asked, her eyebrows raised.
“You couldn’t be stupid if you tried,” I said, laughing. “I want you to relax. For five minutes.”
She sighed and stared at me. I could see how much she wanted to give in. Her body was wrapped around mine, and she showed no signs of moving. We kissed again, and this time, it was enough to make my dick twitch in my pants. Tara felt me get hard beneath her. She pulled away with a grin.
“That’s my cue.” She stood up and walked away from me.
“Fucking tease,” I said playfully.
She laughed and waved me away. I grabbed my stuff and followed her to her desk. The best part of having Saturday sessions was that Tara was the only PT in the building. The worse part was that she always jammed her schedule. She had back to back sessions all day, leaving us no time to be together.
I hated it but more than anything, I was worried she would push herself too hard. This cancer wasn’t something to take lightly. I saw the effects on her face every day. When a headache caught her by surprise, the pain was evident. She winced and her eyes glazed over. She couldn’t focus on anything. She could barely speak.
Every time I looked at her, I searched her face for a sign that she was in pain. Nothing she said could calm my nerves.
“Have you told your dad?” I asked as she sat down behind her desk.
She jerked her head up. Our eyes met, and she shook her head, quickly looking away again.
“Tara,” I said. “You can’t keep putting this off. He needs to know.”
“Why?” she asked. “The doctors haven’t even planned out my treatment yet. They have an idea. Chemo. Radiation. Possib
ly surgery. But they don’t know anything. I have to go in for more tests, and then I’ll tell him.”
“You will?” I asked. I knew she was lying.
“I’ll tell him when it’s time,” she said evasively.
“And when will that be?” I demanded.
“Caleb, back off.” Her eyes were narrowed and her voice was sharp.
“No,” I said firmly. “Look, you know I’m not your father’s biggest fan. Truth is, I can’t stand the asshole.”
“Caleb.”
“But,” I said loudly, “he’s your dad, Tara. He loves you, and he deserves to know the truth, okay? You can’t hide from this forever.”
Tara glared at me, but I didn’t back down. I was right, and she knew it. Darren was a doctor, for fuck’s sake. If any parent deserved to know their child had cancer, it was him.
“It’s not that easy,” Tara said. “What do I say? ‘Hey dad, I’m dying. Talk to you later.’ Not exactly something you can put on a Christmas card.”
“You tell him the truth,” I said.
“I know this isn’t fair to you,” Tara said. “You’re the only one who knows and that puts pressure on you.”
“You think that’s what this is about?” I asked, taking a step back.
“Well, yeah.”
“No.” I laughed. “God, Tara, I don’t give a shit about that. I just want to help you, and I think your dad might be able to do that. You need people around you. More people than just me. You need Darren and my mom. You need Stephanie and your other friends. This fight isn’t going to be easy. You’ll need support.”
“Why?” Tara snapped. “So everyone can watch me die?”
Her words cut through my chest like a knife. I took another step back and shook my head slowly. How could she even say that?
“That’s not funny,” I said darkly.
“You’re right,” she said. “It’s not funny, and that’s why I haven’t said anything. All this will do is make everyone sad. I don’t want that.”
“What about what you need?” I asked.
“What I need,” she said, taking a deep breath, “is for you to let this go. Let it go and let me get back to work. I have another patient coming in any minute.”
She turned away from me without another word. I stared at the back of her head, watching her while she bent over her desk and shuffled some papers. Her shoulders were tight, and her entire body was trembling. No matter what she said, she needed people around her. She was scared. She was sick. This wasn’t something she could face alone.
I opened my mouth to argue again but the sound of an opening door distracted me. I turned my head to see my mom walking toward us. She was there to drive me home. She smiled and waved as she moved closer to us. When she saw the look on my face, she slowed down. The smile disappeared, and she looked from Tara to me nervously.
“Everything okay?” Mom asked.
“Hey Cathy,” Tara said. She plastered a fake smile on her face.
“Hi honey,” Mom said. She smiled back, but she looked worried.
“Caleb and I were just finishing up,” Tara said. “He’s good to go.”
“Tara,” I said softly. She shot me a warning look, but I ignored it. “You need to tell someone.”
“Not now,” Tara hissed, staring at me with a mixture of panic and rage.
Mom looked from Tara’s face to mine. She stared at us nervously until she couldn’t take the standoff any longer.
“What’s going on?” she asked.
“Ask Tara,” I said.
“Why are you doing this?” Tara demanded.
“Because it’s time,” I said firmly. “You can be mad at me, you can even hate me, I don’t care. You still need to tell someone.”
Tara didn’t say a word. She just glared at me while my mom continued to look back and forth between us.
“Tara,” she said softly. “Tara honey, what’s going on? What’s wrong?”
At the sound of her voice, Tara deflated. She turned away from me and locked eyes with my mom. I watched as her resolve weakened. I had her backed into a corner, and she knew it. She didn’t have a choice anymore.
“Cathy,” she said. “A couple weeks ago, I was diagnosed with a rare form of brain cancer.”
“Oh my God,” Mom breathed.
“Let her finish, Mom,” I said.
“I was having headaches,” Tara said. “They were getting worse, so Dad insisted I go see someone. I went in for some tests, and that’s when they found it.”
“Does your father know?” Mom asked.
“No,” Tara said. “I haven’t told him, and I don’t want to. Not yet.”
“What?” Mom blinked. “Why?”
“Cathy, he isn’t even speaking to me right now,” Tara said, her voice weak. “How the hell am I supposed to tell him something like this?”
“I know he’s upset with you,” Mom said. “And I’m sure you aren’t too happy with him, but he loves you. Honey, he loves you more than anything. You have to know that.”
“What if he won’t even listen?” Tara asked. “What if I try to talk to him, and he turns away.”
“He won’t,” Mom said firmly. “He’ll listen. If you make him, he’ll listen.”
Tara sighed and shook her head. She fell into her chair and sat there for a few minutes, not speaking. I looked at my mom who was staring at Tara with fear in her eyes. I didn’t realize how hard the news would be on my mother until I saw her face. She was scared to death.
In a way, I was glad. Now, I wasn’t alone with the news. Tara’s illness was something we could all face together. My mom knew, and once Darren found out, we could get her the help she needed. We could stand by her and support her through all of it.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR - TARA
Cathy swore she would talk to my father. She left the PT building that day, tears in her eyes and a determination I’d never seen. She promised she would make my father see sense.
“Don’t tell him about the cancer,” I said firmly. “Let me do that. Please.”
“I promise,” Cathy said. “I’ll just talk to him. Hopefully, I can make him see how stupid he’s being. You and Caleb aren’t brother and sister. You never were. If you want to be together, he needs to get out of your way.”
“Do you really think that will work?” I asked. “He hates Caleb.”
“He doesn’t,” Cathy said with a weak smile. She turned to her son and touched his cheek. “Darren doesn’t hate him. He never has. He’s just scared. Tara, he lost your mom, and he’s terrified that he’ll lose you too.”
“That doesn’t give him the right to act like this,” I said.
“It doesn’t.” Cathy nodded. “I’ll do my best.”
I thanked her. Caleb kissed me goodbye, lingering on my lips just long enough to make me want more. He smiled sadly and followed his mom out to the car. I watched them go feeling more confused than ever.
If Cathy was right and she could convince my dad to lighten up about Caleb and me, then what? I would have no choice but to tell him about my cancer. Even after telling Cathy, I still didn’t know if I was ready to have that conversation.
The weekend passed in a blur. I suffered through the rest of my sessions on Saturday and spent Sunday with Caleb. We holed up in his apartment, ordering in and watching Netflix until the sun set. It was easy and simple, exactly the kind of day I needed.
My headaches hadn’t yet returned, which felt like a miracle. I let myself believe the doctors were wrong. It didn’t make sense, but while I sat with Caleb on his couch, I pretended my diagnosis was a mistake. I imagined getting a phone call from my doctor, telling me the results were mixed up. I only needed to take migraine pills. It was a daydream I held onto for hours. It kept me happy until Monday morning.
I was sitting at my desk, finishing up some paperwork when the door to the PT building clanged open. I frowned and looked up to see my father walking toward me.
It was early, too early for any PT session
s, so we had the building to ourselves. Dad walked over to me, his face set and his eyes closed off. I could tell he wasn’t ready to talk to me, but Cathy sent him. Immediately, my guard went up.
“Dad,” I said. “What are you doing here?”
“I thought we could have breakfast,” Dad said. “Unless you’re too busy.”
“No,” I said, glancing down at my desk. “I was just finishing some paperwork. My first session isn’t until the afternoon.”
“Great,” Dad said, though he didn’t seem happy. “Does the cafeteria sound okay?”
“Sure.” I shrugged and got to my feet.
We walked into the main hospital and rode the elevator to the third floor. The cafeteria was mostly empty, which I thought was a good thing. If I did end up telling him about my cancer, it would be best to not have an audience.
We got our food, and each grabbed a cup of coffee. When we sat down, an awkward silence settled around us. Dad sipped his coffee and avoided my eyes while I took small bites of my blueberry muffin. It was uncomfortable in a way it shouldn’t have been. This man was my father, the only living parent I had left. I shouldn’t be afraid of him. And yet, I was.
“So,” Dad finally said. He set down his coffee and met my eyes. I swallowed my food and stared at him, preparing myself for a lecture. “Your stepmother said you and I should talk.”
I sighed. “She did?”
“Yes,” Dad said. “She seems to think this rift between us is unhealthy.”
“Well, it is,” I said honestly. “I know you don’t approve of Caleb.”
“So you two are together, then?” he asked quickly.
“I thought you knew that?” I asked, frowning.
“I guess I was hoping to be wrong,” Dad said with a sigh. “Last time I spoke to Caleb, he mentioned that you were pulling away from him. I hoped that meant you’d finally seen the error of your ways.”
“Dad,” I began. “Just listen, okay?”
He stared at me as if he wanted to argue but he didn’t. He pressed his lips tightly together and nodded for me to continue.
“I love him,” I said. Dad flinched. I pressed on. “I know you don’t like him and honestly, I understand why. When Cathy and Caleb came into our lives, Caleb wasn’t in the best place. He was a rough kid who had a lot of problems. Trust me, I know that better than anyone. But I loved him then, and I love him now. The only difference is he isn’t that person anymore.”