“I think I’m going to enjoy dating you,” he said as he pulled off his shirt, a sensuous grin on his face.
Chapter 10
Much later, they lay spoon-style in Holly’s bed with a sheet lightly draped over them. Stephen’s chin was resting on the top of Holly’s head. She wiggled a bit to align their bodies even more intimately and sighed with contentment. She peeked at her bedside clock and saw that it was after midnight. As much as she hated to speak and risk ruining the moment, she had to tell Stephen what an amazing night this was but that she needed sleep. To have shared two such passionate nights in a row with him had been wonderful, but she was completely exhausted.
She told him as much, and he didn’t say anything. She waited, wondering if he was already asleep. “Stephen?” she whispered. “Are you awake?”
“Yes,” he replied softly. He kissed the top of her head. “Can I ask you something?”
Holly nodded, a lump forming in her throat because he sounded so serious. The last time they had had a discussion like this, they were similarly in bed, and it was decided that something like this could not happen again. She fervently hoped that Stephen was not going to suggest such a thing again.
“I know that we sort of made light of it all earlier,” he began, “about this being a date and all, but…I was sort of wondering if you…I mean, if we could maybe try…you know…” God, he was making a mess of this. He held business meetings with wealthy heads of major corporations and did it without once stuttering, and now here he was talking to one woman, and he couldn’t seem to form a complete sentence! He cleared his throat and started again. “I think we sold ourselves short after that weekend. I think we’ve proven in the last two days that we have something here that deserves to be explored. Would you consider—”
“Are you asking me to be your girlfriend?” Right after she said it, Holly wished that she could take it back because it sounded so…high school!
Stephen must have agreed because she felt and heard him chuckle before he turned her around to face him. “Gee, Holly, do you want to wear my letterman’s jacket too?” He burst out laughing, and Holly swatted him on the chest but couldn’t stop herself from laughing too.
Though they never finished their discussion, it seemed they were both in agreement that they wanted to continue. Stephen made love to Holly slowly after that, and later, much, much later, they finally slept.
Things fell into a comfortable pattern after that. They maintained a very professional relationship at the office, but the nights and weekends were passionately hot and wild. They divided their time between their two residences, as Stephen had hoped, and as Thanksgiving week approached, there seemed an air of uncertainty as to what they should do.
Holly wanted to spend the long weekend with him; to bring him home with her to meet her family would have been her number one wish. She knew that Stephen had plans with Will and Derek, and although they hadn’t discussed it, Holly had a sneaking suspicion that he had not told his friends about their relationship.
That thought bothered her. She had readily agreed to get involved with Stephen, and if she were brutally honest with herself, it was working wonderfully and she should never have thought otherwise. Maybe it was time for them to stop hiding. What was the worst that could happen? Stephen wasn’t spending a lot of time with his friends, and Holly had a feeling that, if anything, the girls in the office would almost welcome the news.
Since lunch that one day where they all questioned her relationship with Stephen and she said that he must not find her attractive, they had all at different times encouraged her to try to get his attention. So, really, how the office people viewed her was a nonissue as well. Sitting at her desk, Holly noticed that Stephen was off the phone, and went in to go over his afternoon schedule with him. She made a mental note to bring up the topic of Thanksgiving with him tonight over dinner and then, if that went well, talk about bringing their relationship out into the open. They went out a bit now—not spending time at his house or hers—so it wasn’t as if he were truly trying to keep their relationship hidden. True, Stephen always picked the places they would go. Maybe he was doing that to make sure that they wouldn’t run into any common acquaintances. Deciding not to go looking for trouble, Holly walked into Stephen’s office and went about business as usual.
The plan for that night was to go to Holly’s. It was a Wednesday night, and the agreement had been to grab some takeout on the way home and enjoy a night in. She had no reason to change that but felt anxious to be out of the office and to discuss what she had on her mind. As usual, Holly left the office first, and Stephen was to meet up with her at six thirty; that gave him enough time to finish up his work without any distractions.
On the drive home, Holly rehearsed in her mind how she was going to broach the subject of their relationship with Stephen. She was scared of how he was going to respond. If he was not ready to go public with their dating, what was her response going to be? Would she make demands on him? Would she cry? Pout? Hell if she knew.
Once at the house, she straightened up and poured herself a glass of wine. At six o’clock, her phone rang. Figuring it was probably Stephen with a question about their Chinese food, Holly answered.
“Hello?”
“Hey, Holly, it’s Derek. I’m looking for Stephen. Is he there?”
She was momentarily stunned. So much for thinking that he hadn’t told his friends about the two of them. “Um…no. I think he’s still at the office. Have you tried him there?” For a brief moment, she had wanted to play dumb and ask why he thought that Stephen would be at her house but decided against it.
“Actually, no, I assumed he would be there with you.” He paused, waiting for her to say something. When she didn’t, he continued, “Do me a favor and tell him that we have a seven a.m. flight on Tuesday out of RDU. The condo is booked, the caterer is set, and I have seen to the…um…entertainment.” His words made Holly cringe a little.
“You’re not going to be around for Thanksgiving, right?” Derek asked, his tone sickly smooth, and Holly wanted to hang up the phone and not hear another moment’s worth.
“No,” she replied calmly. “I’ll be visiting my family up on Long Island.”
“That’s good,” Derek said, “because it’s been a long time since the boys have prowled together, and we’re all looking forward to it. Stephen deserves this time away, and I wanted to make sure that nothing…gets in the way.” Holly said nothing. “I’ve known Stephen a long time, and I know when he gets antsy, you know? Personally, the smartest thing to have happen here is for you to go your way for the holiday and for Stephen to go his. He’s too nice to bring this up himself, but I figured you would understand. Are we on the same page here, Holly?”
She wasn’t sure why he was being this way, but she merely nodded her head, and then, remembering that he couldn’t see her, she said, “Yes, I believe we are.” He wished her an early happy Thanksgiving, and then he was gone.
What a bizarre conversation! What in the world had brought that on? Why hadn’t Stephen mentioned that he had talked to his friends about her? There shouldn’t be a secret like this between them if they were serious, she thought. If Stephen was serious about her, he would have broken it to her gently that he had talked to his friends; and knowing how she felt about the two of them, wouldn’t he have left it up to her to see if she was okay with it all? Why, oh why, hadn’t he mentioned anything? This put a whole new spin on what she was going to say to him tonight.
If what Derek said was true, could she really bring up the subject of taking their relationship into the open when he clearly already had—and with these kinds of results? It all seemed to make sense: the way he only took her to certain places, the way their whole relationship was kept secretive…Stephen was doing what she’d feared he would do. He was not comfortable in this type of relationship, and now he was trapped and didn’t know how to get out of i
t.
Numbly, Holly walked into her den and collapsed on the sofa. This was so not the way the night was supposed to go. If she was going to salvage her heart—which she knew without a doubt belonged to Stephen Ballinger—she was going to have to be the one to end things, to let him off the hook.
Not much later, Stephen was there, a bag of Chinese food in one hand, a bottle of wine in the other. Holly hoped her emotions weren’t showing too much and tried to act as if everything were normal. They discussed the news and the progress on the Gideon project, and after dinner was cleared, when Stephen made a move to take her up and into bed, for the first time in their relationship, Holly faked a headache.
“Are you okay?” he asked, concern written all over his face. “What can I get you?”
“Nothing,” she lied. “I think I need to take some Advil or something and go to sleep, if you don’t mind.” If she hadn’t talked to Derek earlier and found out how Stephen really felt, she’d say that he was genuinely concerned about her. As he went to walk with her up the stairs, she turned and stopped him. “If you don’t mind, Stephen, I think it would be best if you went back to your place tonight. I’m so tired, and I don’t think I’ll be able to relax fully with you in the bed with me.”
The look on his face was so tortured, so torn, that Holly almost took her words back. Of course there was a possibility that Derek was wrong, but why would he lie? If anything, Derek was the brutally honest one of the bunch, and while he didn’t seem to care if he hurt anyone’s feelings, Holly had never known him to lie. “You want me to leave?” he asked softly.
Unable to speak due to the lump in her throat, Holly nodded, turned, walked up the steps to her bedroom, and closed the door. Stephen stood on the stairs for a solid ten minutes before he could force himself to move. When he did, he walked to the den and sat down on the sofa, wondering what the hell had happened.
He racked his brain and went over the entire day in his mind, and for the life of him, nothing seemed to stand out that would make Holly send him away. True, it was possible that she really didn’t feel well, but it didn’t feel right. Sighing, he gathered up his belongings and locked the house on his way out. Sitting in his car out in the driveway, he looked up at Holly’s bedroom window and saw that her light was already off.
The drive home was long and lonely. It had been weeks since he’d slept alone, and he wasn’t looking forward to it at all. He liked sleeping with her, even when they slept. Tonight he had hoped that they would discuss the possibility of him going up to Long Island with her and meeting her family, but once he’d arrived at her house with dinner, Stephen sensed that something was wrong.
Once at home and in his own bed, he forced any negative thoughts from his mind. Holly was entitled to not feel well and want to be alone. Tomorrow was another day, and once she felt better, Stephen was sure everything would be all right and they would have their holiday discussion. That thought made him smile, and he finally drifted off to sleep.
Unfortunately, things did not get better. Holly arrived at work Thursday morning and still seemed out of sorts. When he inquired about their plans for that night while she was in his office going over a new client contract, Holly impersonally told him that she had plans with friends she hadn’t seen in a while, and before he could ask about the next night, she let him know that she needed the weekend alone to get ready for her trip to see her family.
It was on the tip of Stephen’s tongue to demand to know what was going on and talk to Holly about him going with her on her trip. To hell with respecting whatever she was going through; he wanted answers, dammit!
Holly was placing the last page of the documents on his desk when he grabbed her wrist. “What’s going on, Holly? Did I do something wrong?”
She pulled free; Stephen didn’t put up much of a fight. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she lied.
“I know you weren’t feeling well last night, but you’re pretty much giving me the brush-off, and I want to know why.”
“Brush-off? Why? Because I need some time to myself?” she said a bit snappishly. “Am I not entitled to some time alone? I’m here every day, and we’re together every night and every weekend!”
He saw red. He knew what this was. Hell, he’d practically given this speech word for word himself a time or two before. Holly was ending things, and for the life of him, he didn’t know why. It was an uncomfortable feeling to be on the receiving end of a relationship ending. For the briefest moment, Stephen thought of begging her to change her mind, to give him another chance…but there was no way he could do it. A man like him did not beg. She wanted space? She could have it. No relationship was worth all this.
Ever since that blasted Friday night his emotions had been all over the place, and Stephen found that he did not like it one bit. Life was simple before, and now, since becoming involved with Holly, he felt crazy and out of control. If she wanted to dump him, then fine. He would handle it; he would move on and never think of it again. They’d work together, and now that he knew the real Holly, it would be easy not to dream about all that he might have had.
If the woman could toss him aside so easily, then she wasn’t the woman he thought her to be, and he wasn’t going to spend another minute agonizing over the future he had wanted with her. Good riddance!
Friday was even tenser. Stephen hadn’t slept well alone for a second night. His anger had not allowed him to relax. When he went to the office the next morning, he treated her as indifferently as she was treating him. He avoided asking her for anything except for what was vitally essential to get him through the day.
He noticed dark circles under her eyes and assumed they were due to Holly being out late with her friends. The thought almost made him growl. At five o’clock when Holly came into the office with a file he requested containing final details on the Gideon project, she handed him a couple of phone messages. She didn’t ask if he needed her for anything else; she simply placed the file on his desk and walked out.
Holly’s spine was stiff, and she couldn’t wait to be out of the building and back in her own home where she could begin the process of mending her broken heart.
It was near midnight when Stephen finally rose from behind his office desk. He was nearly cross-eyed from reading over contracts and travel and installation plans for the Gideon project. He finally picked up the phone messages that Holly had left on his desk—most of them could wait until Monday—and he noticed one from Derek.
“Plane set for seven a.m. Tuesday…” Stephen read out loud. “Caterer…blah, blah, blah…entertainment taken care of…”
Stephen threw down the message in disgust. The last thing that he wanted now was to go skiing with Will and Derek. He’d back out, but at the last moment so he would not have to deal with any bullshit from either one of them. He’d fake a business emergency or something and stay behind and work. Besides, he was due to leave for Texas the Wednesday after Thanksgiving to do an upgrade for a client and then head off to California to begin his work with the Gideon Corporation.
With a much needed full-body stretch, Stephen turned and looked out the window at the city below. He really should head out, but the thought of driving home at this hour was completely unappealing. The sofa would do again. Since Holly wasn’t sharing his bed, he found that he didn’t sleep well. It didn’t matter where he slept now; he didn’t stay asleep for long anyway. Removing his tie and kicking off his shoes, Stephen made himself as comfortable as humanly possible on his large leather sofa.
In order to keep himself from thinking about Holly and what she was doing right now, he forced himself to think about what he was going to need for his travels and how he was going to convince this particular client of doing the upgrade for all his offices…and it didn’t take long to fall asleep.
Holly, on the other hand, went to bed early each night and tossed and turned through most of the night. The last two day
s had been hellacious, and luckily she knew she’d only have to deal with one more day with Stephen and then they’d both be gone for several days. She could do one more day, couldn’t she? Apparently not.
Deciding early on Saturday morning that she could not take another day, Holly decided she was going to change her plans. Instead of flying home to Long Island, she was going to drive and leave as soon as possible. Luckily she had opted to add the flight insurance so she wasn’t penalized for the cancellation. Besides, the time alone in the car would be a good way to clear her head a little.
She called Judy, the temp who normally took her place whenever she was out of the office sick or away on business with Stephen, and told her of her plans. It was probably improper protocol, and Holly knew she should call Stephen and let him know of her change of plans, but she decided against doing so.
Sunday afternoon, Holly was driving north, heading home. With any luck, a full week away from Stephen Ballinger would be enough to ease her pain.
Chapter 11
Stephen stepped out of his office early Monday morning and froze. What was Judy doing here? He had slept in his office all weekend, and although he had already showered and changed, he hadn’t shaved since Friday.
“Oh, good morning, Mr. Ballinger,” Judy said. “Coffee will be ready in a few minutes. I’ll bring it to you with your messages as soon as it’s ready.” She smiled and was about to walk away when Stephen spoke.
“Where’s Holly?” he demanded, a little more harshly than he had intended.
“Oh, she said she decided to leave early for her Thanksgiving holiday and asked if I would mind covering for her. I assumed that you knew.” She stood there, unsure what to do.
Stephen was dumbfounded. He couldn’t believe Holly had changed her plans without talking to him first. He had counted on having her here today to help him get his things organized!
In the Eye of the Storm / Catering to the CEO Page 13