by Eugene, Lisa
Luke had made dinner for us last night at my apartment. He’d been the master chef and I’d been his assistant—roles that had translated quite nicely later that night in the bedroom. He was the only chef I knew who ate more than he cooked. And he seemed to really enjoy his meal. I couldn’t help giggling at my very dirty thought.
We’d shared a bottle of wine, talked, and laughed—mostly laughed—for hours. I’d told him a bit about my childhood and growing up in Scarsdale, and he’d shared more crazy stories of his family. He also divulged some details of his business and talked about the current upheaval. It was a shame the acquisition hadn’t worked out and that he was going through such a tough time. He’d worked hard to become established and develop his reputation. I wished there was something I could do to help him.
I picked my head up when I heard the door to my office open. Alice walked in, a folder in her hand.
“We got a sizable check from Christian Relief Aid,” she announced happily. “We’ve already reached a third of our goal and the autism event hasn’t even occurred yet!”
“That’s great news. We might exceeded our expectations. The organization can certainly use the money.” I suppressed a yawn.
“I need to put another person on the journal since Cindy is out.”
I frowned. “She’ll be back on Monday.”
Alice shifted her weight and I could tell she wanted to say something.
“What’s going on? Is everything okay?”
Tracking back to the door, Alice closed it securely. She turned to me with her forehead pleated.
“Did Cindy tell you why she decided to go home?”
I shook my head, growing concerned. “No, she didn’t.”
Alice held her posture stiff. “She’s pregnant. She wanted to tell you, but I think she’s scared.”
Shock moved quickly through me. I’d spoken to Cindy many times since Christmas, and although I thought she was hiding something, I didn’t question her. I never liked prying. I wanted the girls to feel they could trust me and decide for themselves when they were ready to share. Poor Cindy must be terrified.
“Her mother freaked out because she didn’t want another mouth to feed. She told Cindy to stay gone, not to ever come back.”
I pursed my lips, anger filling me up. I didn’t understand how someone could turn their pregnant child out on the street. “That’s horrible. I knew there was something she wasn’t telling me.”
“I think she’s afraid she’ll lose her job here.”
“That’s ridiculous!”
“With the baby, she needs it more than ever.”
“She has a job here as long as she needs one. She knows that!”
“I told her you’d understand. We know how you are.” Alice smiled. “But with her family tossing—”
“We’re her family. We’ll help her through this.”
“All the girls feel the same way. She’s a real sweetheart. I won't tell you why she ran away in the first place, it’s up to her to tell you that. I’m the only one who knows, but let’s just say she’s been through hell. I’m surprised she ever wanted to go back. But family is family.”
I nodded, feeling I understood some of Cindy’s motives. I felt an even deeper connection to the lost young girl I’d met on the street many years ago.
“I’ll have a talk with her.”
Alice came around the desk and wrapped her arms around me. She pulled back and smiled, the scar pulling her lips askew. “Thanks for all that you do.”
I managed a feeble smile as Alice left the office, thinking I didn’t do nearly enough. My gaze landed on my desk and I noticed that Alice had left her folder. Picking it up, I turned to chase after her, and my feet turned to stone. Josh’s large body filled my doorway, his shoulders immense and his blue eyes iced with hatred. His face looked like he’d run into a Mac truck, still bruised and discolored from Luke’s fists. Fear wrestled with my limbs and the folder crashed to the floor, regurgitating it’s contents. Taking a step into the room, he closed the door firmly behind him.
“Hello, Kay. Missed me?”
My gaze sidled to the phone on my desk. “You shouldn’t be here. Leave.”
Josh issued a wicked chuckle, his gaze following mine. “You planning on calling your boyfriend?”
“Get out of here!” I tried to mask the tremor in my voice with courage.
He took a step closer to me, blocking my path to the door. “He’s a criminal, you know. He murdered his wife, strangled her to death.”
I curled my fists, anger flaring at his slanderous words.
“That’s a lie!”
Josh laughed again, a dry crackle scratching from his throat. “His wife left him, did you know that? He pumped her full of drugs and fed her habit. She tried to get away, to get help. He’d threatened her life numerous times. Finally the fucker did it, and got away with it. Do you know when her body was found, she had a shit load of cocaine in her system?”
I wanted to run. I wanted to call the police like Luke had told me to, but my knees were shaking so badly I could hardly take a step. I didn’t know why I was listening to him. He was a liar.
“Just thought you might want to know your future. He’s a violent man. He’s lucky I didn’t bring charges against him for attacking me. He has my father to thank for that.”
I stared into the cool depths of his eyes. He was lethally calm, studying me intently. Certainly he didn’t come here to talk about Luke. Maybe he’d state his business, get things off his chest, and leave.
“What are you doing here? What the fuck do you want?”
His gaze met mine and his face tightened, bulging the muscles in his jaw. He took a step closer, causing me to cautiously ease back. His big body shadowed mine and now I could see the layers of vile anger in his eyes.
“I want what’s mine.”
The intensity of his words shivered chills over my skin. This man was crazy. He had no rights to me.
“I’m done listening to you. This relationship is over!”
“Fuck the relationship, you stupid bitch! I’m talking about what I’ve worked three years for, a piece of that trust fund.”
I drew in an audible breath, the shock of his words like another slap in my face. He couldn’t be serious! He had to be out of his fucking mind! I struggled to make sense of his ugly words, but his evil glare confirmed a fear that had always been buried deep, a fear that Luke had exhumed.
Grasping for excuses, I stuttered, “But—but I have no access to that money. My mother is the trustee.”
He laughed. “No longer. Not since you turned twenty-two. All the money and property is yours. You got your last percent six months ago.”
Anger moved through me now, hot and potent. He’d obviously done his homework. We’d never talked about the provisions of my trust.
“If you think I’m giving you any money, you are out of your mind!” I yelled.
He stared calmly—too calmly.
“If you don’t give me what I want, I swear to you that I will expose you for the lying, cheating bitch that you are. I’ll tell the world how you enjoy going to dirty sex clubs. I’ll tell everyone how you’ve used the foundation’s funds to pay for your profligate lifestyle while saving your own money in your fund. I’ll go on every talk show I can find and defame the Vandercamp name.”
My body started to vibrate with rage. How could I have ever loved this man? Tears filled my eyes, but I refused to cower.
“Go ahead. No one will believe you.”
“Some will believe me. People are always looking for gossip. First, though, I think I’ll start with your parents. What do you think they’ll think of my plan, Kay?”
An image of my mother came to mind along with her resentful enmity on Christmas day.
“Hmm, Kay?” He sneered. “I’ll tell you the first thing she’ll do. She’ll ask you to step down from the foundation. Someone with your immoral reputation couldn’t head such a prestigious organization. You’ll never
get donations. She’ll hire some stiff accountant to run the foundation and the first thing he’ll do is get rid of all your stray mutts. They’ll be out on the streets. Every single one of them.” He finished the sentence with a smile.
I felt my heart fold in like origami, a fragile paper bomb on the brink of exploding to shreds. Oh, God! That’s exactly what my mother would do! She’d never been happy that I had taken over the position. Although I had the money, it was the Vandercamp name that brought in the donations. I’d never be able to do it on my own. Everyone would be let go! They’d had no formal training, no experience. Most of the girls had never even finished high school. Pregnant Cindy would be devastated and who knew what would become of her and her baby. How could this man be so cruel?
He’d lied to me. Our relationship had been a farce. He’d only been after my money. I stared at the evil twist of his lips and truly saw him for the first time. I saw everything clearly.
“You lied. You’ve been sleeping with Carol this whole time, haven’t you?”
The corner of his dry lips turned up. “I fucked her every chance I got.”
My heart exploded in my chest, scraps of paper up in flames. My palm flew up, about to connect with his cheek, but his hand shot out and caged my wrist. He squeezed hard, sending pain shooting through my arm. A whimper wheezed from my throat as he brutally twisted the limb.
“She’s something else isn’t she—Carol? A little actress. You know, it was her idea to go to you in tears. I told her it wouldn’t work, but hey, she always said you’re dumber than you look.”
I winced, the burning pain reaching to my shoulder. I could feel the excruciating stretch of muscle and sinew. Any more pressure and my bone would snap. I wanted to scream, but the girls would come in, and who knew what Josh would do, or who he would hurt. He was volatile, hovering on madness.
“Fine!” I said. “I’ll give you the money. You're breaking my fucking arm!”
He lessened the pressure minimally, then leaned in and told me how much he wanted. I couldn’t believe his audacity. It would take some time to get that much. Most of my trust was tied up in stocks I’d have to sell.
“You have two weeks. And if you tell anyone, you’ll be sorry. I’ll carry through with my plan. I have nothing to lose.”
With those words, he dropped my wrist, and I cradled my throbbing limb. Tears were rolling down my cheeks now. Tears because I’d allowed myself to be duped by this man, because I’d been a fool. Luke had been right.
“Did you kill Ms. Carmen? Did you set Luke up?” I had to ask, because now I knew what this monster was capable of.
Josh paused and his gaze skewered me. “He deserves every thing he’s gotten. He deserves to lose everything. He turned my father against me. I have to grovel for scraps from my own family like a fucking dog. It’s what he wanted from the beginning: to have me under his thumb. I hope the fucker rots in jail.”
“I. Hate. You,” I said between clenched teeth, the words scarcely expressing my contempt.
He smiled then, his gaze dropping to my lips in a way that made my skin crawl and my stomach revolt. Gripping the back of my head, he slammed his lips down on mine. I struggled to pull away from the crushing force, my protests trampled by his ruthless mouth. My scalp burned from his tight grip as I tried to tear myself away. Fear punched through my gut and fueled my body, causing me to flail wildly. The pain in my arm stabbed through me. He abruptly pulled away, and repulsed by the taste of him in my mouth, I inhaled sharply and spat the poison back in his face. I watched the droplets sprinkle his skin, and quickly recoiled, fearing retaliation.
“Bitch,” he growled, swiping a hand across his face. “I once told you I won’t let you leave me. One way or another, Kay, I’m getting what’s mine. Two weeks.” At that, he turned and left the office.
Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!
A long, shaky breath shuddered from my lungs, and trying to quell the panic roiling inside me, I slumped into my chair. Hyperventilating, I covered my face with her palms and wept quietly. I smothered my sobs for fear my staff would hear. What was I going to do? I looked at the phone, my first instinct to call Luke. But Luke would go after Josh like that night at the party. Josh might press charges this time—something he didn’t need right now. I watched the reddening bruise track up my arm, as I relived the nightmare. Oh God! What a fucking horror I’d brought on myself! What a fool I had been!
As soon as Michelle opened the door to her apartment, I stormed in. I was still shaking like a leaf, my teeth rattling with fear. Michelle gasped and pulled me into her arms.
“Kay, what the hell is going on?”
I hiccupped a sob, too distressed to speak. I wasn’t even sure I should be here, but had no one else to turn to.
“Did something happen? Is it Luke?”
I shook my head, my forehead buried in my friend’s shoulder.
“It’s okay, Kay. I’m here,” Michelle crooned. She pulled back slightly, trying to see my face.
I looked up, but was so distressed and unraveled that I covered my face with my hands. The action must have pulled down my coat sleeves because I heard Michelle’s sharp intake of breath. I knew the ring around my wrist was transforming to an ugly, discolored bruise.
“Oh My God! What happened to you? It was Josh, wasn’t it? You saw him.”
I nodded and saw anger transform Michelle’s features. “That fucking animal! You have to call the police this time.”
I shook my head, feeling a strong deja vu. This was just like the last time I’d shown up here and barged in on my friend. That night.
“I can’t,” I cried. Tears soaked my face because I knew I should report his actions and get a restraining order, but I also knew he’d carry through with his threat and go to my parents. I’d lose the foundation. My employees would be out on the streets.
“Then call Luke!” Michelle implored.
I swung my head back and forth. “No. He has enough to deal with right now. This isn’t his problem. Besides, he might go after him.”
“Good. His ass needs another beat-down! That bastard shouldn’t have gone near you! What else did he do? Did he threaten you?”
I walked to the couch and sat down, fingering the delicate gold key chain Luke had given me for Christmas. I always carried it. It reminded me of our night together, of his strength, his passion. I squeezed it in my palm, trying to contain my hysteria. It felt like someone had ripped me to shreds inside. “He wants money. He threatened that he’ll spread lies about me if I don’t give him money. He said he’d go to my parents.”
Michelle stared in shock, her mouth agape. “Is he truly insane?”
“Yes, he is. And he will do it if I don’t pay him off.”
“You’re not seriously thinking about giving him what he wants, are you?” Michelle sat next to me, her face appalled.
“What choice do I have?” I sobbed. “You know how my parents are!”
“Kay, don’t do it.”
I shifted to face my friend with a self-deprecating sigh. “How could I have been so stupid, Michelle? He never loved me. It was always about the money! How could I’ve let myself fall for that? Am I that gullible?”
She gripped both shoulders and her brown gaze met mine. “No, Kay. You’re not that gullible. Josh is that ruthless and manipulative. You have the kindest heart of anyone I know. Josh exploited that kindness. He turned your greatest strength into your biggest weakness. He took advantage of you and he’s still trying to.”
“But how could I not have seen through his lies? He’s been sleeping with Carol the whole time. How could I have ever loved him?”
Michelle swore under her breath. “Look, I know this will cause you to question yourself and your judgment. It’s normal to do that given the circumstances, but take a step back.” She pursed her lips. “Think about what you really felt for him.”
My brows drew together as I considered my friend’s words. I tried to quell the noise in my head, tried to anal
yze my feelings and find a singular truth. “I was committed to spending the rest of my life with him. I loved him.”
“Did you, Kay? When you talk about Josh, you talk about his problems and all his issues. You were always trying to fix them, trying to help him. Maybe it wasn’t love, Kay?” Michelle shrugged. “Maybe it was this…desire you have to save the world. I think that’s why you stayed with him for so long. Not necessarily out of love, but because you saw a man who was damaged and needed help. You wanted to help him.” She shook her head sadly. “But Josh’s kind of damage you can’t fix. He’ll just destroy you. He needs professional help.”
I shot my friend a weepy smile. “How did you get to be so wise?”
Michelle donned a cheeky smile. “I’m not just a pretty face and a sexy body. Besides, that’s what best friends are for.” Her expression turned teasing. “Honestly, I’ve seen you smile more in the last few days than in the last three years. Pumpernickel agrees with you.”
I felt my face flush. I wiped my eyes and looked down, running the links of the keychain through my fingers. “Luke is wonderful. He makes me laugh. I know it sound hokey, but when I’m in his arms I feel…grounded, secure, like I belong there.” I looked up sheepishly through my wet lashes. “And the sex is ridiculously good.”
Michelle grinned. “Once you go pumpernickel…”
We shared a chuckle, then Michelle tilted her head and regarded me. “You okay dating a guy with a kid?”
I thought for a minute then nodded. It was a first for me, but I really liked Livy. “Doesn’t bother me. She’s a sweet girl.”
“Dealing with these murder charges must be tough on him.”
I nodded and ran a palm over my wet face, blowing out a deep breath. I was glad I’d confided in my friend, but could still feel the heavy anxiety like a crushing squeeze. This was additional strain Luke didn’t need right now. He was already going through enough. He didn’t need to be dealing with my problems.