by Kelly Long
Josiah clapped his hands. “Gut. We’ll finally get to visit Luke. I’ve missed him. When can we visit him again?”
She kissed his forehead. “I’m sorry I’ve kept you from Luke. It was wrong of me. I’ll talk to him about it soon.” She grabbed a lantern and herded them outside. They hurried to match Star’s pace.
Josiah hugged her arm. “Danki, Mamm.”
Beth nodded. “Yes, danki, Mamm.”
She swallowed. The kinner would be lost without Luke if she chose Mr. Young. She knocked and the door swayed open. Luke had left it unlatched. She went inside. “Luke, may we come in? Are you all right?”
A moan came from a far room.
Josiah and Beth followed her with worried faces.
The haus was eerily quiet and dark. She lit the kerosene lamp closest to the door on a small table in the entryway. She squinted and noticed dirty dishes and a half-empty glass of water on the kitchen table. That wasn’t like him. He’d always put his tools away and cleaned up his mess after doing repairs at her haus. Her breath caught. Something was wrong. She found another lamp and turned it up. She gestured toward Josiah and Beth. “No, you two stay in the sitting room.” She ran her hand along Star’s soft black fur. “Play with Star. I’ll be right back.”
She crept down the hallway and found Luke in his bed. She stepped gingerly to his bedside but kept her distance. His face appeared flushed, and his body trembled. Moving a little closer, she touched his forehead and quickly withdrew her hand. Warm and clammy. He had a fever.
He opened his eyes and his lips quivered. “Charity, what are you doing here?”
“Star scratched at my door. He must’ve sensed something was wrong. You need a doctor. I’ll ask Mamm to mind the kinner and fetch him. First, I’ll get you a drink of water.” Not waiting for his response, she returned to Josiah and Beth. She explained to the kinner about Luke’s condition and why she’d need to drop them off at her mamm’s. “Leave your coats on. I’ll be back in a minute. I’m going to the kitchen to get Luke some water. He’s sick.”
They frowned and nodded.
She hurried to the kitchen and pumped water into a pitcher and poured him a glass. With one hand to her churning stomach, she returned to his room. He shivered and winced. She grew light-headed.
“Can you sit up?”
He struggled to raise his head.
She held the glass to his lips. Her heart ached for him. He barely had the strength to sip the water, his body quaking. “I’ll be back. You rest.”
His voice was weak. “No. I don’t want you to go out in the snow and cold. I’ll just sleep and be better in the morning.” He reached out and took her arm. His hand shook against her skin. “I’m glad we’ve moved past our disagreement. I missed you.” His eyes closed and his body trembled.
She put a hand to her heart. She shouldn’t have shunned him. “I’m sorry for being rude to you, Luke. I took my frustration out on you, and you didn’t deserve it.” She put a hand to her chest. “Please rest. I’ll be right back.” She retrieved the kinner and trudged through the snow to their haus. She retrieved her horse and wagon, then she and the kinner headed to her mamm’s. She was glad it was a short distance. The wind blew cold.
Beth knocked on the door. “Grossmudder, Luke’s sick.”
Josiah hung his hat on a hook. “Star came and told us.”
“How did Star tell you?”
Charity hugged her mamm and recounted how Star had led them to Luke. “I’m worried about Luke. He’s a vibrant man, and the raging fever has him weak and shivering. I’ll rest easier if Dr. Harris examines him. Maybe he’ll have medication to help lower Luke’s temperature. Do you mind watching the kinner?”
“Of course not. You be careful.”
Charity bid the kinner farewell, climbed in the wagon, and guided her horse to town. Her heart ached for Luke; he had looked miserable. Throwing a blanket, then a saddle over her horse and fastening it, she paused. What if this was more serious than just a fever? She adjusted the bridle, then pushed the thought from her mind.
Dreading bothering the harsh doctor, she hoped he’d agree to come back to Luke’s. Arriving at his haus, she rapped on his door.
He appeared and frowned. “What brings you here?”
“Luke Fisher is ill.” Charity recounted Luke’s symptoms. “Will you please come to his haus?”
Dr. Harris grabbed his coat and medical bag. “I’ll tell my fraa where I’m going and meet you there.”
Returning home, she put the horse in her barn, then waited for Dr. Harris on Luke’s porch. She rubbed her arms. It’s so cold. A few minutes later, Dr. Harris arrived. She accepted his animal’s reins.
“You go on in. I’ll stow your horse out of the winter air and then I’ll come inside.” She hurried to secure his horse, then went inside and added logs to the dwindling fire. Flames burning bright, she removed her gloves and held her hands close to the fire. Warm at last.
She put a hand to her forehead. She hoped his illness wasn’t serious. She’d done all she could for now. She went to Luke’s kitchen and washed and dried the dishes. She stretched the damp dish towel on the counter to dry.
Dr. Harris entered. He lifted his chin and stared down his nose at her. “His fever is high, but he doesn’t have a cough or nausea. I’ve given him two spoonfuls of medication to lower the fever and to help him rest. I put the bottle on his bedside table and told him to take two teaspoons every four hours until his fever is gone. I don’t suspect anything serious. When his temperature breaks, he’ll feel much better. If not, please fetch me.”
“I will. Danki.” She followed him outside, escorted him to the barn to get his horse, and waited until he left before she went back to check on Luke. The doctor’s cool demeanor hadn’t changed since the last time she’d encountered him. No matter. She was grateful he’d come to Luke’s to check on him.
She went inside, got a glass of water, tiptoed to Luke’s bedroom, and stood a few feet away from him. “Are you doing all right? Is there anything I can get you?” She set the glass next to his medication.
“Danki for getting the doctor. I’ll be all right. I just need sleep, and I’ll take the medicine.”
“You’re wilkom. Get some rest.”
“Danki again, Charity. Your being here is the best medicine.” He managed a weak smile.
Her cheeks warmed. “It pains me to find you ill. I hope you’re better soon. I’ll check on you tomorrow.”
He pulled the covers tight. She turned down his lamp and left. Heading for her mamm’s haus, she fretted about Luke. Pale and in obvious discomfort, it was difficult to watch him suffer. She put a hand to her heart. She would fix things between them after he healed.
She knocked, then walked inside her mamm’s haus. “Hello.”
Mamm met her. “How’s Luke?”
Josiah and Beth hugged her.
Beth wiped cookie crumbs from her mouth. “Is he all right?”
“His fever is high. I’m hoping the medication Dr. Harris gave him helps lower it. Dr. Harris left the medication on his bedside table. He’s to take two teaspoons every four hours, but I’m not sure he’ll be in gut enough condition to take it. He really shouldn’t be alone, but it would be improper for me to stay at his haus at night.”
“Why don’t you take me over to Luke’s? At my age, no one is going to question me watching over him until morning. I can give him the medicine.”
Her mamm had stepped in and eased her mind more times than she could count during her lifetime. She was doing it again. She had a generous heart, and nothing flustered her. She should’ve been a nurse. Beth resembled her mamm in this regard. “I’d rest easier if you’d tend to him. I’ll be glad to take you.” She gestured to Josiah and Beth. “Get your coats, hats, and gloves. We need to get Grossmudder to Luke’s and you to bed.”
Beth peered up at her. “I want to help Luke.”
“It’s thoughtful of you, but no, he needs his rest. Grossmudder is going to ta
ke care of him.”
Josiah let out a deep sigh. “Feed Luke your chicken broth and bread like you do me when I’m sick. That’ll make him better.”
Her mamm chuckled. “Gut advice, little one.”
“Can you walk to Luke’s?”
“Jah, the exercise will do me gut.”
Charity and the kinner escorted her mamm to Luke’s. She yearned to check on Luke herself, but her kinner needed to get to bed. The time had gotten late. “Will you be all right, Mamm?”
“Jah, child. Go home and get some rest.”
Charity and the kinner left and arrived home. “Change into your nightclothes, and I’ll tuck you in.” She hurried to stow her horse and wagon in the barn.
The kinner sat on the floor in Josiah’s room.
She knelt beside them.
Josiah yawned. “I’ll go first.” He bowed his head and folded his hands. “Dear Heavenly Father, please forgive me for my sins. Please make Luke better so he can take me sledding and we can fix things together. I love You. Amen.”
Beth then bowed her head. “Dear Heavenly Father, please forgive me of my sins. Please heal Luke and take away Mamm’s sadness. Please tell her to let Luke come back. He makes her laugh and us, too. We miss him. I love You. Amen.”
She had been blessed with loving kinner. She kissed their foreheads and tucked Josiah in his bed, then held Beth’s hand to her room and tucked her in.
Her precious kinner would be asleep in no time. Her heart lay heavy. This past week had been the longest and loneliest week she’d experienced in a long time. Maybe she should wait a little longer before giving up on Luke. She groaned and rubbed her temples. She should’ve put Mr. Young off a bit. She might have gotten herself into a mess.
Luke woke early. He dressed and followed the aroma of baked bread to the kitchen.
Mrs. Vogel grinned. “You have your color back. How are you?”
“I’m weak but on the mend. I’m starving.”
She straightened her apron. “I have hot tea on the stove and warmed chicken broth. If your stomach accepts the broth all right, then you can have something more substantial.”
Luke was fond of Mrs. Vogel. She had her gray hair wound in a bun under her kapp, and wire spectacles rested on her nose. The frail little woman moved slowly and winced in pain now and then, but she was always full of cheer. Charity’s mamm took slow steps and care in lowering herself to a chair.
“Danki for taking care of me and for breakfast. I’ll take you home after we’re finished.”
“You’ve done so much for my family, I’m happy to do it. You take it easy today. It’s not far. I can walk home. I’ll stop by Charity’s and tell her you’re doing much better.”
Her concern touched him. “I insist on taking you home.” He spread a cloth napkin on his lap. “I’ll feed the animals, but I won’t venture out. I have no repairs scheduled today. Once my strength returns, I’ll be as gut as new.” He sipped the tea she passed to him. “You raised a kind dochder. She’s a wonderful mamm and a hard worker.”
Mrs. Vogel buttered a slice of bread. “Charity’s a strong and determined woman, but money’s been tight since Aaron’s passing. The wood, food, and supplies you’ve brought her have helped tremendously.” She sipped her steaming hot coffee. “Are you happy here in Berlin?”
Luke sipped his broth. The salt rolled over his tongue. “Jah. I’ve grown roots here. I plan to stay for a long time.”
“Your news will make Charity and her kinner happy.”
“They are the main reason I’m happy living here.”
She grinned. “I’m glad to hear it.” Mrs. Vogel sipped her coffee and conversed with him about gardening while she tidied the kitchen. “I should head home and tend to my animals.”
“I’ll hook my horse to the wagon.”
He shivered in the bitter cold and headed to the barn. He rubbed his thighs. His legs hadn’t regained their strength yet. He hitched his horse to the wagon and pulled it outside.
Mrs. Vogel joined him, and he helped her climb in. He took her the short distance to her home, bid her farewell, and shut the door for her. On his way home, he had an idea. He guided his horse over to Charity’s. A thrill jolted through him. He tied his horse to the hitching post, stepped onto her porch, and rapped on the door.
She opened it, a puzzled expression on her face. “Luke, you shouldn’t be out in this weather any more than you have to be. You need to give your body a chance to heal.”
“I won’t come in. I realize the kinner are in school.” He spread his mouth in a wide grin and ran one gloved hand over the other. “Will you, your mamm, and the kinner join me for Thanksgiving? I’ll get a turkey from the peddler, and I’ll cook dinner.”
She frowned and whispered, “I’m sorry. Mr. Young has asked us to join him, and I accepted.”
He removed his hat and raked a hand through his hair. His concern about Mr. Young talking to her after church had been right. “Mr. Young, the widower who has six kinner?”
“Yes, and my mamm is joining us.”
“No, no, no” hung on his tongue. The idea of her with another man rendered him speechless. The way he felt on the day Martha left him. He needed a minute alone. Turning on his heels, he hurried to step off the porch and move toward his haus. He groaned. It was his fault for shying away from her questions and not sharing his feelings.
“Luke, please come back later. We do need to talk.”
He shook his head and waved over his shoulder. He needed time to digest what she’d told him. He flexed his gloved hands. Another man might snatch her away from him. The bishop had warned him that another man might show interest in Charity. He should’ve listened.
On Thanksgiving, Luke cooked eggs, bacon, and grits for dinner. The haus stood quiet, except for Star’s panting and tail slapping the wood floor. He pictured Charity, her mamm, Josiah, and Beth in his haus. He shut his eyes. He could almost hear their voices ringing out over the snap of game pieces on a tic-tac-toe board as they teased each other and laughed. What if Mr. Young won her heart?
He trudged through the wet snow to the barn and checked on the animals, then headed back to his haus. Eyes wide, heat rose to his face. There stood Martha. “Why are you here?” He wouldn’t invite her in. He owed her nothing. They were no longer even married. She’d played him for a fool. He had hoped never to lay eyes on her again.
Cheeks tearstained, her dark hair hung in ringlets around her face. A long red wool coat fit snugly to her small waist and thick hips. The matching hat and velvet ribbon tied at her chin outlined her sweetheart face. Elegant, but none of it was appropriate as far as he was concerned. They were a harsh reminder of her desire for the world.
“Aren’t you going to invite me inside?”
“How did you find me?”
“I went to our old haus in Lancaster. The couple who bought our place told me you had given them your address here.” She hugged herself. “Let’s go inside. It’s cold. I need to speak to you. It’s important.”
He heaved a big sigh. She’d ripped his heart in two the day she destroyed his trust and left with the Englischer. “I’ve nothing to say to you, Martha.”
She fell against him, hugged him tight, and pressed her lips against his. “Please, Luke, please.”
His eyes widened. He shrugged her off and stepped back. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “Keep your distance, Martha.” She was married to another man. What was she thinking putting her arms around him? During their marriage, he couldn’t wait to have her in his arms each day, but not anymore. Hands on hips, he glared at her. “Where is your husband?”
“I’ve left him. He gambles and is a drunk. I found him last night in the arms of another woman. I can’t stand him.”
Married or not, he had no interest in her personal life. He felt nothing for her.
She clutched his arms. “I made a horrible mistake leaving you. Please forgive me. I love you. Please take me back.” Her lips were inches from his.
“We had a gut life. I’m sorry. I’ll never leave you again. We can sell this place and buy a haus in Massillon. You’ll love living in the world. The food, clothes, dancing, modern conveniences, and music are wonderful. Let me show you. We can experience it together.”
He clenched his teeth and stepped back from her again. Who was this stranger he’d once loved? She hadn’t known him at all, or she wouldn’t even suggest such a thing. More than anything, he wanted her to get on her horse and never return. He crossed his arms against his chest. “You’ve turned your back on God, Amish traditions, and me. You have no place in my life anymore.”
She looked at him with pleading eyes. “You can’t turn me away. I have no money. Where will I go?”
He heaved a big sigh. He wouldn’t leave her stranded. He dug in his pocket and pressed some coins and paper money in her gloved palm. “Take this and don’t come back.”
She stepped over to him, threw her head back, and beat his chest with her fists. “You make me sick.”
He moved away from her. “Please go.”
She swished her coat skirt. Her mouth spread in an evil grin. “You can have your boring Amish life. I’ll have no part of it. I’d rather have your money anyway.” She spit in his face and mounted her horse.
He wiped her spittle from his cheek and shook his head. The world had changed her. She was self-indulgent and rude. He’d found her beautiful before they married. She’d had a gut sense of humor, but she could be as stubborn as a mule. They’d argued more than any couple should, but he’d given in to her most times to keep the peace. The gut times outweighed the bad for a time, but he’d sensed she always wanted more than he could give her. He wouldn’t want any harm to come to her, but if she returned again, he’d refuse to have one word with her.
A barn door shut next door. Startled, he turned his head and caught sight of Charity hurrying across the yard to her front door. He cringed. Had she seen Martha? He hoped not. He should’ve told her he had been divorced and why. He’d tell her everything about his past soon. Pulling his coat tighter, he lowered his head and went inside.