Counterpart (Succubi & Incubi Assn.)

  Apparently I was.

  ****

  It was a warm night tonight so I was dressed in a pair of sweats and a tank top. I didn't care who saw me. It was nearly 4AM. Who would even be awake at this time? Well, considering the news of Tristan’s match being sent to anyone and everyone, apparently a lot of people were awake.

  I wrapped my arms around my middle and tapped my foot against the concrete. I was sitting on a bench underneath a tree that was at a local park. A lamp sat lit a few feet away from me, showing me the footpath to get around.

  This park held a lot of memories over the past year and a half. It was one of the places I liked to go to—mostly for inconvenient reasons, like smoking weed with Melinda or drinking by myself. It was a place made of memories. More importantly, it was the place Tristan and I met for the first time.

  “Do you remember this tree?”

  I turned around and saw the man himself, leaning against the tree casually. He seemed like he just woke up, wearing a worn-out pair of jeans, a plain black shirt, and his hair looked like he just ran his fingers through it and he was done.

  “Of course I remember this tree. You looked like a guy trying to sell drugs.” My lips pulled up into a grin, which made him chuckle and take a seat next to me.

  “And you looked like a girl looking for drugs.”

  It was true. It was a weird day, but it turned out fine.

  More than fine really.

  “God, I hate this winter crap,” I said, trying to breathe as much hot air onto my hands. Why didn't I buy gloves? Whose great idea was it to go out while it was freezing?

  Melinda’s.

  “Here, Maya Moaner. Hold this and shut up.” Melinda passed me a freshly made mocha from Starbucks and I sighed in relief at the warmth. We walked out of the warm building and onto the wet streets. It had stopped raining a few minutes ago and I really hoped it didn’t come back for at least another century.

  “Hey, do you have a smoke?” she asked, patting at the pockets of her trench coat, “I must’ve left mine in my dorm.”

  “Yeah sure.” I pulled my hand-bag in front of me and searched around for the packet. “Fuck.” I checked my pockets, but nothing. “I must have dropped them in the park. Hang on, I'll go get them.”

  I handed her my mocha and ran across the wet pavement to the nearest park. We had come here during lunch and decided to get a coffee before heading back to campus.

  The park wasn't as crowded as it would be during the summer, but there were a few college students scattered here and there, sitting under trees, sharing a smoke, drinking coffee.

  I walked at a fast pace, scanning the ground we walked on. I arrived at a bench that we stopped at, and looked under it, finding nothing but cement and discarded rubbish.

  No smokes.

  “Looking for drugs?” a male voice asked, sending a jolt through me and almost making me hit my head on the bench as I came up.

  He looked around my age, with a long lean body that was covered by a trench coat. My eyes wandered the length of him quickly. I couldn’t tell if he had any muscle on his body, but he was on the skinny side, so if he did, it probably wasn’t much.

  Vibrant blue eyes that didn’t even seem real to me watched with an arched brow, and I was almost sure he knew I was looking at him. A few strands of his brown messy hair had fallen down and settled on his forehead, making him seem cute in a way.

  I was sure that if he smirked, he would probably make me melt right here.

  There was something about him though, he seemed almost… innocent, and I was hardly interested in innocent right now.

  “Why? Are you selling?” I answered, straightening up until I was standing fully.

  I watched as his lips pulled up and he showed a row of pearly whites. “Unfortunately, I'm not. Sorry to disappoint.” He stretched his hand out to me. “I'm Tristan.”

  I was hesitant to take his hand, only because I didn’t know who he was, and also, because I don’t really shake hands that much. But I did it. I took his hand. And boy was I wrong about him.

  As soon as the skin-to-skin contact happened, I knew there wasn’t anything innocent about him. Actually, in the few seconds that we shook hands, I felt alive. My breath had hitched. The demon inside me started turning like a ballerina on ice. She liked this guy. And hell, I had to admit, so did I.

  “Maya.” I flashed him a grin, my hand embracing the warmth that came with his long fingers. “It's nice to meet you, Tristan.”

  So, that was the start of a beautiful, yet complicating friendship. The more time I spent with him, the more I got to know him. He wasn’t that cute blue-eyed Tristan that I met at the bench. He was the one person that seemed to always make me feel better. He never judged me, not once. Not a single word was said about my lifestyle.

  But the more our friendship grew, the more I found myself wanting him around. And that was bad.

  Did I mention I didn't find my smokes at all that day? They had completely disappeared.

  “It was a rather interesting day.” I smiled at the memory and let my legs swing under the bench.

  Tristan’s leg lightly touched mine and I found myself taking a deep breath. There was something off in the air, something I wasn’t going to like. I just didn’t know what it was, but I had a feeling it wasn’t all good.

  “Congratulations on getting your fight back by the way.” I tried to push away my unwanted thoughts and I held my smile. “I can't wait to see you win.”

  “That's actually why I wanted to talk to you.” He sighed, running a hand casually through his hair.

  My smile faltered and I nodded, signifying that he could go on.

  “Maya,” he turned his face to me and instantly I wished he would move those blue eyes away. “I don't know what happened that night... of the fight, but I got so pissed seeing his hands on you, and I could tell—deep down I could tell—that you didn’t want it.” He finally dragged his eyes away and looked down to the ground. “I don’t regret what I did, but I fucked up.”

  No, you didn’t. “Tristan, you can't blame yourself.”

  “That's it, Maya. I have to blame myself. I have only myself to blame for everything.”

  I was starting to think we weren't just talking about the fight. “Tristan, what's going on?”

  He kept his eyes on the ground, not making a sound. I gave him a moment in case he was just thinking, but after a few long seconds all I got was more silence.

  “Tristan.” My hands moved on their own, grabbing his large ones and bringing them between us. There was a response to my touch and his head snapped up in my direction. We were close, his knee still casually touching mine, my hands keeping his hostage. I stared into his eyes, trying to find an answer. There were dark lines under them, but it didn’t ruin how his long lashes touched against his cheek. I felt myself moving forward, wanting to be closer to him. My breathing wasn’t normal anymore, except it had shortened and sped up. I was being pulled into a trance I knew I had been in before.

  I noticed his eyes flick down to my lips and his own parted in response. Our noses were almost brushing, but I knew I couldn’t keep going. He was here for a reason and I wanted him to tell me it. “What’s going on?” I whispered.

  He watched me for a quick second and I felt one of his hands slide out from under mine. My breath noticeably hitched when I felt his fingers touch my jaw lightly, his thumb coming up to brush along my bottom lip. “The way I feel for you,” his voice was low and almost a murmur, “it's unexplainable. I can’t even describe the thrill I get when you’re nearby. It’s like being on a constant high.”

  His fingers moved up my cheek, and before his palm pressed against the skin, I was already leaning into his hand. “There is not one ounce of my body that wished I didn’t know you.”

  He didn't once let his eyes linger away from me and I held the challenge with my own. I wanted to close the stupid distance between us, take him all in and never let him leave again. But his words didn’t seem
like he was on the same boat. Actually, the way he was speaking almost proved that.

  “I’m being selfish,” he murmured, pulling his hand away. As soon as the touch disappeared, I knew I wasn’t going to like this. I hated that he had slid his other hand out while I wasn’t noticing.

  “I'm kind of worried now.”

  His face was still towards me but his eyes were stationed over my shoulder. “You should know something.”

  I waited, anxiety building inside me. My demon was also getting restless.

  “Tori and I had sex,” he finally said.

  It was like a bomb being dropped out of the blue. It wasn't something I expected. It was something I had considered, but not once did I think it was the truth. “Oh.”

  I shouldn't feel so disappointed about this. It was bound to happen, right? But I thought her celibacy was more important.

  “It happened the night of the fight.”

  The hole of disappointment grew deeper, and I was just about ready to bury myself in it. He had sex the same day he was in bed with me. Yeah, we didn't have sex, but he was still there. I knew she was seeing him, but if I knew they were going to have sex the same night... I... actually, I didn’t know what I would’ve done.

  I wanted to go home. I wanted to go back to my bed. I have no right to be disappointed. I was just his friend that he casually made out with. I was just the person that comforted him. We were only friends. Nothing else.

  Ashamed at myself, I turned my body back around and linked my fingers between my legs. It was warm, but my body was cold. It was like ice had now taken over the blood that ran through my veins. “Okay,” I whispered. It was the only thing I could come up with.

  There was a long silence that followed. I thought that was going to be the end of our conversation, until he sighed. “There's more.”

  Oh, great. Was he going to tell me that she was pregnant too? Were they going to run off to Vegas and get married? If so, I don't want to be invited.

  “I think we shouldn't see each other anymore.”

  I would have preferred the wedding bombshell.

  “Are you serious?” I asked, not understanding.

  “It's for the best, Maya.”

  “It’s for the best?” The disappointment I felt before changed and evolved into anger. “You obviously don't know what the best is, Tristan. You're going to end our friendship over her?”

  “Was there really a friendship to begin with?” His answer was quick and snappy. The words hit me like a tidal wave, taking every emotion—except anger—with it. How could he even question our friendship? Yeah, it was different and complicated, but he had the nerve to tell me that we didn't have a friendship.

  “You have to be kidding me right?” my voice was hard and calm. I was giving him the chance to say, 'Yes, I am joking. Now kiss me' but I knew that was a long shot.

  I was considering punching him for both his and Melinda’s stupid reasons for getting me out of bed today.

  “Maya, I’m so—”

  “Don’t say you’re sorry.” I didn’t want to hear it.

  The anger was bubbling inside me. “I was there for you through all your crap, Tristan. And you want to sit there and tell me that there wasn't a friendship?” The words were starting to come out in their own accord and I had no motivation to stop them. He was ending our friendship because his bitch of a girlfriend was more important. “Then what was it, Tristan? Was it a little booty call? Was I just your twenty-four hour therapist? Because I was every single one of those things to you. So yeah, it probably wasn’t a friendship for you, but it was one for me. So you know what, you can go back to your Malibu Barbie and fuck the fake shit out of her. But when she can't satisfy, or when she ditches you for something more important like a day out in the spa, don't—and I mean don't—come calling to me.”

  He kept his eyes on the ground, his jaw tensed while his body stayed rigged.

  “You’ve changed, Tristan.” I could feel my voice getting weak. “And frankly, I don’t think it’s for the better.” I didn’t wait for him to answer. Instead, I did the one thing I should have done that day we first met.

  I walked away with no intention on looking back.

  Nine – Maybe I Need Therapy

  “So he dumped you at the one place you guys met?” Melinda asked, twirling a piece of her hair mindlessly as we walked to the gym. “How unique of him.”

  After leaving Tristan at the bench last night, I went home and headed straight to bed, ignoring the fact that Melinda was wondering what had—and I quote, 'sauntered up my asshole and put me in a cranky mood'. I didn't want to have to explain to her what happened. I couldn't even find it in myself to shed tears. It may be because I've never seen one of my kind cry, or the fact that I was too angry to let it out.

  It stung, don't get me wrong, it hurt just thinking about it. But after being in a dark room with my own thoughts, I really didn't have a reason to be pissed. He wasn't mine. I didn't own a bit of his soul or energy.

  So why did it hurt?

  “He didn't exactly dump me,” I muttered. I needed to work off all the emotions that were mutating inside me, sending my demon into a frenzy that neither one of us liked.

  “Yeah, but if you think about it, he practically did.” Her face showed sympathy towards me.

  Eventually, I did tell Melinda about last night. It was actually about 9 minutes and 23 seconds ago that I finally got it out of my system. She was just taking her time at processing the information.

  “I still can't believe you told him to fuck the fake shit out of the blonde,” she grinned, “I'm so proud of you.”

  “Don't be,” It wasn't that I was regretting the words I said, because I didn't. But I stooped so low that even I had trouble trying to understand that I said it. “I was angry.”

  “Either way, you were only saying the truth.”

  We arrived at the gym at 1:30pm—I knew this because I was constantly looking at the time, hoping Tristan wouldn’t be there. He didn't have his gym class today, but he did have his moments when he came in by himself.

  There was a song playing softly when we walked in. My ears instantly concentrated on the slow strum of the guitar. It was familiar. Actually, it sounded like the song that was playing the night of Tristan’s twenty-first.

  Great, now everything is starting to remind me of him.

  Thank God Sophia decided to talk then.

  “Hey, Maya, and, look... it’s Melinda. You’re a sight for sore eyes.” Sophia walked around the counter and gave Melinda a tight hug.

  Just like Jamie was my human-best friend, Sophia was Melinda’s.

  “I know, right? I've been such a bore to hang out with lately. We should catch up though.”

  “Yeah, totally, I heard they were opening a new nail salon around the corner, might be interesting to check out.”

  “You have a deal.”

  Sophia turned her attention to me, and the friendly smile was gone, replaced with a small frown. “Did you hear?”

  “I've heard those three words more than once today, and the first time got me pissed.”

  Her gaze flickered to Melinda and I saw the succubus roll her eyes at the comment.

  “Uh,” she turned back to me, “well, hopefully this one doesn't go that far,” she was hesitant now, but eventually, it came out, “Tristan terminated his membership this morning.”

  The information hit me instantly. “What?” I don't even think I heard her right. “You're kidding right?”

  Melinda was as shocked as me. “Yeah, this must be a joke.”

  Sophia shook her head and went back behind the desk. “Nope, I wish I was joking but he came in himself and terminated it. The kids are going to be devastated.”

  “No kidding.” The kids would be more than devastated. I leaned over the counter. “Did he say why?”

  “Not a single reason. Tori was here though, probably trying to present herself as support.”

  Melinda and I shared a knowing lo
ok. We were both thinking the same thing. Tristan leaving the gym was like me saying I was giving up on sex—it just wasn't going to happen. But here he is leaving the gym, the one place he went to let out his anger or to remove himself from the world.

  And he went and left it.

  Then Tori was here.

  “If I find out she provoked it, I'm going to be—” my words cut off. What was I going to be? Mad? I was already mad. Tristan didn't want to see me anyway, so why should I bother? “You know what, that's his decision. People change, world still rotates. I'm sure he had a valid reason.”

  It was silent for a minute. Glances were exchanged, silent words of disbelief. But like I said, I have no point bothering.

  “I'm going for a workout,” I murmured, leaving Melinda and Sophia to ponder over their thoughts.

  ****

  “But don't you think it's weird that he just left, with no reason at all?”

  I picked up my speed on the treadmill, trying to get as much strain building in my calves so I didn't have to walk for the next week.

  “Maya?”

  I pressed harder on the buttons, willing it to go up further. I didn’t want to talk about Tristan.

  “Maya, you're going to over-work yourself.”

  I ignored Melinda. All she wanted to talk about was Tristan. I didn't.

  “Maya!”

  Her words mimicked in my head. Tristan this. Tristan that. I can’t believe Tristan did this. I can’t believe he did that.

  “Maya, stop.” A hand came over and stopped my own from puncturing a hole in the plastic button. “Fuck, what is wrong with you?”

  “I'm fine,” I snapped. I snatched my hand back and shut the machine off, needing to get away. I didn't know what was wrong with me, and judging by the sickening feeling in my stomach, my demon didn't like it either.

  “I'm going to go get some air.” I grabbed a towel from my duffel bag and wiped the sweat off the back of my neck, walking towards the main entrance.

  My stomach was twisting and turning. It was like nausea, but I knew I wouldn't puke. My demon was going crazy lately, and even though I had fed her yesterday, she wanted more.

  So much for helping Tristan with his stupid match, it wasn’t even worth it in the end. I thought it would help us, but all it did was end us.