by Leah Atwood
“What’s wrong?” I started to look back, but he put his hand on my arm to stop me.
“Don’t look. Trust me. It’s not pretty. You don’t need to see it.” Taking my hand, Ryan tried to guide me in the opposite direction.
“Well, now I have to look. I’m sure I won’t turn into a pillar of salt.”
Pulling away from Ryan, I turned and gasped. A bird was stuck in the front grillwork of the truck! Lodged right in there by its beak with its skinny little bird legs hanging out. After exchanging a glance with Ryan, I sprinted back to the truck.
“Oh, no! That poor little guy. What should we do? Try to pull him out or just drive and…hope he falls out?”
“How should I know? Don’t touch him!” Ryan put his hand on me as if he thought I’d be so foolish as to handle the bird carcass with my bare hands. We stared at each other for a few moments. “I honestly don’t know what to do.” A frown creased his forehead, and he planted his hands on his hips. “This isn’t something I ever expected to happen. Today of all days.”
Determined not to allow this unfortunate incident to spoil our day, my mind swirled with ideas. “This is a state park, so there’s bound to be a ranger or two around, right? They’ll know what to do and can probably help us.”
“You’re brilliant. That’s why I’m…” Ryan stopped and gave me a quick kiss. “That’s why I love you. Let’s go find Ranger Bob. Or Joe.”
“Or Susan,” I said. “Equal opportunity and all that.”
A half-hour later, Ranger Randy and Deputy Paul (I don’t know if he was a deputy or not, but that was my nickname for him), carried the dearly departed bird in a bag and wished us a good day. Or at least a better day from here on out. The way they nodded at Ryan with knowing smiles tipped me off that he must have shared his plans for the day. He must have mentioned it during the time I’d walked away. I’m wondering how that conversation might have gone—“Thanks for helping pull that dead bird out of my truck’s grill. Now I can go propose to my girl.”
In any case, I couldn’t bear to watch as they’d disengaged (for lack of a better word) that poor fowl from the grillwork of Ryan’s truck. At least he was already dead.
I shivered at the thought and ran my hands up and down my arms.
“What a morbid way to start the day,” Ryan grumbled as we waved good-bye to the helpful park rangers, and they drove off in their official truck.
“Let’s go have a nice, romantic picnic,” I said. “The day can only get better, right?”
We spread the blanket on the ground near a shade tree instead of sitting at a picnic table. Seemed more romantic somehow. I kicked off my tennis shoes and settled across from Ryan. I opened the picnic basket and told him how much I appreciated what he’d done to make this entire week special. Ryan prayed for our meal, and then we started to eat the sandwiches and fresh fruit. The little touches he added were special—he served me a turkey sandwich on a stoneware plate and poured apple juice into wine glasses.
Ryan raised his glass in the air and then carefully clinked it against mine. “A toast to the most gorgeous, fantastic girl in the world. The girl I’ve loved since…well, pretty much the beginning of my life.”
I smiled at him over the top of my glass as I took a sip of my juice. “I didn’t know you could be so sentimental.”
“I have my moments. And, before you say anything, the reason I said ‘pretty much’ is because I can’t remember things from when I was under the age of two.”
“Selective memory,” I teased. “From what I know, most people don’t remember anything earlier than the age of three. Besides, I didn’t like you very much until you tossed that frog down my shirt.”
“Ah-ha! I knew it!” I watched, amused, as Ryan punched one fist into the air. “The truth comes out. You thought you hated me, but I knew that frog would sway your opinion. Long-term, at least. It only took a few more years to convince you.”
I nudged his leg with my bare foot. “Are you saying you committed frog assault only to get my attention?”
He chuckled and winked. “Subconsciously, I think that might have been the case. You should have seen yourself. I wish I had a tape of it. You were pretty amusing jumping around and flapping your shirt up and down.”
“At least I was only five at the time,” I said with a sly wink. “Don’t even think about doing it ever again.”
Ryan gave me a sweet kiss. “Once we’re married, I’m sure I can think of more creative ways to get a rise out of you.”
“The things you say, Mr. Sullivan.”
The day was beautiful with a slight breeze, and I enjoyed the opportunity to relax and be together one-on-one with Ryan. We talked about our plans for the house and landscaping. Building a deck was something we agreed we’d like to do so we can have cookouts and invite our friends over for summer dinners. String up some lanterns and talk late into the night. Dance under the stars in private.
Halfway into eating his sandwich, Ryan wrinkled his nose. “Do you smell something?”
“Like what?” I asked, chewing my second bite of sandwich. From his expression, I could tell it wasn’t a pleasant aroma. More like a stench.
“Something funky.” He groaned. “If that’s what I think it is, maybe we should go home and try this outing again next week.”
“Don’t be silly. Wait…what is that?” I’d caught a whiff. “I think the wind shifted, and it’s now wafted my way.”
“And now I’ve lost my appetite.” Tossing the uneaten portion of his sandwich on the plate, Ryan retrieved the plastic wrap.
“I thought animals weren’t allowed in this part of the park.” I’d pinched my nostrils with two fingers, making my words sound nasal.
“No comment. Some kind of animal’s been here. That’s for sure. Unbelievable.” About that time, we spotted an unleashed dog wandering nearby. That explained the source, anyway.
“You know what? I’m not that hungry.” I wrapped my sandwich and began to pack up our things.
“I’ll take you to dinner someplace special tonight to make up for this disaster, Sass.” Shaking his head, Ryan smirked. “At least it’ll smell better.”
“Ryan, the place doesn’t matter. As long as you’re with me, I’ll be fine.” I planted both hands on the blanket and, on my knees, leaned closer to him. “I find it incredibly sweet that you planned this romantic day for us. I’ll never forget it.”
Speaking of unforgettable, I gave him a kiss he’d always remember. Good kiss. As I pulled away, something on the ground—beneath the blanket—made me lose my balance. I nearly hit my chin on the way down and ended up falling on my side.
“Aw, man! I’m sorry. Are you okay, Ellie?” Ryan jumped to his feet and helped me up. “What happened?”
I couldn’t help it. I started laughing.
“Well,” I said through my giggles, “I think one of us sat on what was beneath the blanket. The warmth from our body heat made it more…pungent…and that’s when—”
“I get your point.” Laughing with me, Ryan pulled me into his arms. “You are such a good sport about stuff like this.” He kissed the tip of my nose. “Let’s get out of here.” He eyed the blanket. “I’m not sure I even want to look.”
“You don’t really need that blanket do you?” I said. “It looks kind of old and ratty.”
“Nah, I don’t need it. Especially now.” As I packed up the picnic basket, Ryan carefully lifted the blanket and then carried it over to a large trash receptacle. After dropping it in the can, he walked with me back to the truck, swinging the picnic basket between us.
~~♥~~
Hearing laughter behind me, I turned in my chair beside Cora’s bed.
“We’re sorry to interrupt, Ellie, but that story is priceless!” Krista gave me a wink. “I’m glad you and Ryan could see the humor in it.”
A monitor connected to Cora beeped. And kept beeping, sounding more insistent. A light started flashing. Krista and several of the other ladies rushed past me and st
arted speaking in medical terms.
I rose from the chair and quickly left the room. One of the aides called for the doctor.
Please, Lord, be with Cora if this is her time. I knew she was ready, but was I ready to let her go? I was overcome by the sense that I shouldn’t be the only one in her room. Where was her daughter? Why didn’t Beatrice come to visit her mother?
I retreated to the hallway. A staff doctor flew down the hallway and darted into Cora’s room, closing the door behind him.
Leaning against the wall, I bowed my head and prayed.
Chapter 16
~~♥~~
I felt a hand on my shoulder a short time later.
Opening my eyes, I met Krista’s concerned gaze.
“She’s okay, but this type of event is happening more often with Cora.”
“Krista, your honest opinion, how long do you think she has?”
“It’s difficult to say. She could go at any time. Then again, she could go on in her current state for another year or two. From what I know of Cora, she wouldn’t want to linger.”
“I agree. Did she sign a DNR?”
“No,” Krista said with a sigh. “So, legally, we will continue to resuscitate. Unfortunately, her daughter hasn’t returned our calls or responded to our attempts to contact her.”
“Do you know anything about Beatrice?” I’d only met her a couple of times through all the years I’ve known Cora, and one of those times was at my father’s funeral.
“Only that she’s a high-powered executive with some software firm in Minneapolis. She’s divorced with two grown kids. I don’t think Cora has any great-grandchildren.” Krista shrugged. “I don’t really know.”
How sad. I’d never seen cards from grandchildren or anyone else.
“Ellie, in many ways, you are Cora’s family. I’m sure—somehow, in some way—she knows you’re here and that you talk to her. That you love her.”
I nodded and wiped away a tear. “Thanks, Krista. You have my phone number, right? Call me if anything happens. Day or night.”
Krista nodded. “I will. For the record, and I’m sorry if the timing is wrong to ask, but did Ryan propose that day or did he wait?”
“Well, Ryan knows I love lighthouses, and he took me to the Marblehead Lighthouse. They have tours on select Saturdays, and we were able to join one of them. We climbed the steps to the top to view South Bass, the Middle Bass Islands, and the Sandusky Bay area. And then we spent some time at the beach, walking along the shore, playing in the waves.”
“So, is that where Ryan asked you to marry him?”
My lips upturned. “He waited until we went back home that evening. I told him I didn’t want to go to a restaurant. I fixed fried egg sandwiches with mayo and cheese—his favorite—and we ate them by candlelight. It turned out to be very romantic. After our meal, Ryan helped me with the dishes, and then he escorted me to the sofa. At some point, he’d placed a red velvet ring box on the coffee table. Ryan slid to one knee, opened the lid of the box, and held it up for me to see the beautiful round diamond inside. Then he said, ‘Eleanor Rose Franklin, I love you with all my heart and always have. Will you please grace me with the honor of loving you for the rest of my life?’”
I lifted my hand for Krista to see my engagement ring.
“Let me guess. You said no?” Krista smiled and took my hand to see the ring from a closer angle. “It’s gorgeous, Ellie. Even though I haven’t met Ryan yet, he sounds like a great guy. And he’s marrying a lovely girl. I know you’re going to be very happy together.”
An idea popped into my mind. “Come to the wedding, Krista. I want you there if you’re not going to be busy with your own family. It’s on Christmas Day at Cade’s Corner Community Church.”
Krista’s eyes lit at my invitation. “I’d love to come! If you’re sure.”
“I insist. It won’t be the same without you. The wedding’s at two o’clock.”
“Count on it. Thanks so much, Ellie.”
I retrieved my coat and bid Cora good night. Then I began my walk home. With my boots, I kicked up the light, fresh snowfall. Seemed like it’d been snowing most every day in the past couple of weeks.
I thought about when Ryan left for his first deployment. It was at the end of his sophomore year in college. He came home one day with excitement written in every part of his body and in his expression. And announced he’d signed up with the Army. It’d come out of the blue, and I had no idea he’d harbored any interest in joining the military.
“They need more military personnel in Afghanistan,” he told me. “How can I resist the call? I can always go back to school later on.”
“God and country first,” I said under my breath as I turned the corner onto Dream Street. Because of his schooling, he was able to enter the Army with a slightly higher rank, not that it mattered. Maybe it did to Ryan.
How could I beg him not to go without sounding selfish? I respect and admire his loyalty and courage. But, in the back of my mind, I worry for him, for his safety. And try not to feel like third best. I know Ryan would hate it if he suspected I’d ever felt that way.
So, I hide my insecurities and pretend to be a grown-up, especially during this second deployment. Ryan promised this would be the last. Then we can get on with our lives.
I don’t know how the wives of public servants—firefighters and policemen, especially—can handle the constant stress. If they don’t have assurances from the Lord, where do they get their hope? Their strength? How do they come to terms with the constant fear? Do they jump every time the phone rings in the middle of the night, and their husband is out on a call?
Lord, I can’t do this without you. Help keep me strong.
I’ve prayed every day for the Lord to keep Ryan and all our servicemen and women safe. I miss him like crazy. I’m independent to a degree, but without Ryan, part of me is missing. The best part. I work better when we’re together. We share everything, our personalities complement one another, and we bring out the best in one another. Friends can fill the void to a certain degree, but it’s not the same thing.
Through it all, my faith has been strengthened by our separation, and I’m putting my trust in God that He’ll bring Ryan home safely to me.
I can’t believe anything else.
Chapter 17
~~♥~~
Wednesday Morning, December 20
Glory, hallelujah!
The day I’ve waited for, prayed for, and hoped for, has finally arrived.
As soon as I spied Nick through the picture window, heading across the street toward the Perchance to Dream office, a feeling of unease coursed through me.
You’re supposed to be on your way to Dayton to pick up Ryan!
Had Ryan’s plane been delayed? What else could it possibly be? I bit my lower lip to still its trembling.
My first glimpse of Nick’s face made it clear something was wrong. Very wrong. The slump of his shoulders revealed something weighed heavily on his mind. He opened the front door—the jingle bell ringing merrily—and stepped inside. Brushing snow from his wool coat, Nick’s worried expression became cause for heightened alarm as he headed straight for my office.
I told myself that although he appeared worried, he didn’t look like a man burdened with grief.
Stop it, Ellie! Listen to what he has to say. My brain wanted to scream, and my heart hurt already. This couldn’t be good.
“Hey, Ellie.” Nick stood in the doorway and avoided my gaze. That was unusual.
“Hi, Nick. Please. Come in. If you’re going to get after me for leaving the front door unlocked while I’m working alone, you needn’t bother.”
Without answering or removing his coat, Nick fell heavily into the chair on the other side of my desk. I’ve never seen him like this. Not once. My pulse began to race, and I swallowed hard.
Something was wrong. I could feel it in my bones.
“I thought you’d be on your way to Dayton by now. Did Ryan call you?
I haven’t heard anything. Is his plane delayed?” The questions tumbled out of me.
“That’s why I’m here. Um, Mom and Dad got some news last night.” Clue number three. Nick never said um.
“I’m not sure the best way to tell you this, Ellie, but it seems that Ryan’s team is—”
“They’re what?” I sat back in my chair, holding my breath, afraid to hear his answer.
Nick’s gaze met mine. “They’re missing.”
“Missing?”
Please Lord, no. No!
I stared at Ryan’s brother, trying to form the next question as my mind swirled. Nick explained that the helicopter with Ryan and his team of seven men had disappeared from radar.
“How long ago?” I was afraid to cry, afraid not to cry. Giving into crying was as good as admitting Ryan was dead. I refused to go there. I needed to be strong. For me, for Nick, but especially for Ryan.
“Sometime in the early afternoon yesterday, their time. They were on a short, final mission—something unexpected, I guess. It was only supposed to be a couple of hours and then they were headed to the plane that would bring them back to the States.”
Oh, the irony. I couldn’t even begin to fathom the injustice.
Stay calm, Ellie. I forced myself to take a few deep breaths.
God, you are in control.
Rising from my chair, I moved around my desk and sat in the chair across from Nick. I took his hand in mine and waited until he met my gaze.
“Nick, why didn’t you call me?”
Nick’s expression softened as he looked at me. I could see the anguish in his chestnut-colored eyes as he slowly shook his head. “Forgive me, Ellie. I just couldn’t. Until we had more details, I didn’t even want to tell you. I couldn’t do that to you. Not now.”
I swallowed hard. I couldn’t lash out at my friend. He’s as stunned as I am. He loves Ryan fiercely, just as I do. We need to keep a united front, our families need to cling to one another, and together we’ll get through whatever might come in the days ahead.