For if you love me, choose another and a younger lover, for I will not endure to live with you, old woman with young man.
I read it and then read it once more.
The Fates have spoken.
It’s not meant to be. Though the poem speaks of an age difference, it’s the least of our differences. I have lived the last seven days in a sort of fantasy world. But it’s not real and I’m beginning to see that Nicolai’s feelings are the product of circumstance and infatuation. That’s all. My own feelings, well, they don’t warrant consideration.
Unfortunately, this realization brings very little comfort. The whole encounter with Nicolai is too fresh and I still yearn for him in a way I shouldn’t. Oh, if only we had met at a different stage of life or in a different life altogether.
But this is the life I have and this is the one I must live.
I shower, dress and pack, trying to ignore the leaden quality to my limbs. By nine-thirty, I’m ready to check out. I’ve not only missed Nicolai, I’ve missed Alander and my eight o’clock flight. There is only one option left, I’ll drive out to the airport and book a ticket on the next flight sometime this afternoon.
But the Fates aren’t done with me yet because I open my door to find Alander standing outside, wearing a grey suit and exuding an aura of pissed off supremacy.
“You’re late.” He’s wearing his sunglasses so his eyes are unreadable. His lips aren’t so hard to read, pressed together as they are into a scowl.
“I slept in.” I put a hand on his shoulder to move him out of the way.
He side-steps in front of me, blocking my path. Then he lifts my chin and studies my face. His irritated tone changes to one of concern. “Look at you. You’re exhausted.” He makes a clicking sound at the back of his throat. “You’re coming with me. Let’s go.”
“Alander,” I say, allowing exhaustion to suffuse my tone. “I’m not coming with you. I’m flying out later today. Then I go to London. I’m sorry, but—”
“No,” he says. “You do not have a choice in this.” He turns toward the stairs and calls down in Greek. Within seconds I hear the pounding footsteps of one of his bodyguards. “Takis, take these bags downstairs.”
I let Takis take my bags, not because I’m giving in but because I’m too tired to argue. The boutique hotel is lovely but has no elevator. The idea of having to haul my luggage down even one flight of stairs is too much for me right now.
It doesn’t mean I’m giving in to Alander. Not at all.
I try to explain this to him but he’s not having any of it.
“Honestly, Alander. I won’t be good company and I certainly won’t be any fun.”
“Is that your way of saying you won’t have sex with me?”
“It’s my way of saying I’m flying back to Athens. Alone.”
This does not put him off. He comes closer and takes my hands in his, lifting them to his lips. “My darling, Tessa. Do you think sex is all I want from you?”
“Yes.”
The indomitable Alander Papadakis actually cracks a smile. “You’re wrong. I happen to enjoy your company. I enjoy it very much, though you have this irritating habit of disobeying me.” He kisses my knuckles. “We can be lovers or we can be friends, it’s your choice. But you will come with me now. I absolutely insist.”
***
I give in. The man is persuasive and I’m much too tired to fight him today. Now, as I stand at the bow of The Athina, Alander’s super yacht that is as swanky as a seven star hotel—or so I’m told, as I’ve yet to stay at a seven star hotel—with four decks, a pool, a hot tub, a staff of thirty and enough space for forty guests, I’m glad I gave in. To the starboard side (at least I think it’s starboard, I’ve got to brush up on my ship-lingo) I can see a pod of dolphins approaching.
Who doesn’t love dolphins? They wear a permanent smile and have this unapologetic desire for play. It’s like one of them sees a ship and calls out to the rest, “Boat! Boat! Come on, everyone. Let’s go!”
They reach the bow wake and start jumping and leaping, twisting and turning. As I watch them, I feel light-hearted for the first time in days.
Suddenly, I sense Alander’s presence at my side. He’s got a drink in each hand. He hands me a glass filled with champagne spritzer.
“Does watching them ever get old?”
He shakes his head and frowns, obviously not understanding the meaning of my English phrase.
“Do you ever get tired of seeing the dolphins play beside your boat?” I rephrase my question as I point below.
“Never.”
We stand side by side watching the amazing display of acrobatics.
“You know why dolphins are so happy, don’t you?” Alander says, moving closer to me.
I shake my head, only half listening as I watch them leap over one another, as if in friendly competition.
“Dolphins spend thirty percent of their time in sexual play.”
I elbow Alander in the ribs. “That’s a lie.”
“No.” He places his hand over his chest in mock seriousness. “I only speak the truth.”
Of course I don’t believe him.
“Dolphins exhibit a variety of sexual behaviors, you know. Masturbation, homosexuality, copulation with other species.”
I give him a smack. “You’re just making that shit up to get me into bed.”
“Is it working?”
“No.”
He sets his drink down and pulls out his mobile. After a moment of surfing, he hands me the device. On the screen is an article from Psychology Today on the sexual lives of dolphins.
I read the article. Huh. He wasn’t lying.
I hand the phone back to Alander who is smiling smugly. “You see?”
I nod, marveling. I’ve never seen Alander like this before, so easygoing and lighthearted. It’s strange...but nice.
“Look at them,” he says picking up his drink again. “They are all about finding the next great pleasure. No excuses, no apologies, just joy.” He takes a drink. “I should like to be a dolphin in my next life.”
“You and me both.”
He invades my space in order to whisper in my ear, “Let’s be dolphins now.” His tongue touches the lobe of my ear as his hand strokes my ass. “Let’s just play and have fun. I want to see you smile again.”
“I am smiling,” I say, pointing at my mouth. “See?”
“I want to see the kind that reaches up to here.” He strokes high up on my cheek, beside my eye.
I widen my eyes, trying to force my smile into them.
He just shakes his head.
“I’m not going to change my mind, Alander,” I say, pushing my blowing hair out of my face.
“We’ll see.”
He bends to kiss me on the temple and then walks away.
Chapter Twenty-Four- Alander
Surprisingly, I don’t see Alander for the rest of the afternoon. Maybe he’s ensconced in his seven-star-stateroom with one or more of his female companions. Did I mention the boat has enough room for forty guests? Well, Alander has filled a number of those guestrooms with a baker’s dozen of scantily clad women.
It doesn’t bother me. Quite the opposite. The virtual United Nations of model-worthy women totally takes the pressure off me. If Alander needs to unwind, sexually, he’s got a candy-store assortment of playthings to choose from.
So, I spend the time reading on deck and then treat myself to a massage before dinner. The dining room on this boat is stupidly lavish. Large enough to host a small wedding, I feel like I should be dressed in an evening gown and not the simple cotton dress I’m wearing. When Alander joins me and it’s just the two of us at a table that seats twelve, I can’t help but ask, “Where are your friends?”
He has the audacity to look perplexed by the question. “I gave Takis and Dametri the night off.”
“I’m not talking about your bodyguards, I’m talking about your lady-friends.” I waggle my brows at him.
He gives me a disdainful look and waves his hand dismissively. “Pah. We dock tonight in Khios. I’ll send them away once we land.”
“Don’t do that on my account. I don’t mind, Alander. Really. Keep your gaggle of girls. You’re going to need them.”
Alander shakes his head, totally ignoring the crew members laying out a feast in front of us. Mussels in white wine sauce, fresh pita, lobster tails, crab legs, roast lamb...good God! There is an obscene amount of food for just the two of us. I’m tempted to make a comment to Alander about ways in which he can cut costs in order to keep afloat (ha, ha! That’s even funnier because we’re on a boat), but...
“Why are you laughing? Those women mean nothing to me.”
The fact we’re having two different conversations, one in my mind about his finances, and one out loud about his harem, makes me laugh harder.
“Would you care to explain what is so funny?”
I doubt Alander will take kindly to my prying into his finances, no matter how qualified I am, so I go back to the topic of his pretty pets. “Those girls kept you busy all afternoon which means you weren’t trying to sweet-talk me into bed. Please don’t make them leave.”
“I wasn’t fucking, I was working all afternoon. This,” he indicates the yacht with a sweep of his hands, “is the best place to work.”
“Is that right?”
“Yes. No distractions.”
“Not even topless girls?”
Alander scowls at me but there is a light in his eyes that tells me he’s not really offended and is actually playing along with my teasing.
“You are the only distraction on board.”
I laugh. “Flattery. Nice try. Still not changing my mind.”
He raises his eyebrows as if to say, ‘we’ll see.’
Then we dive into the food.
There is only one word to describe this meal. Rich. The sauces are smooth and creamy, the meat is savory. It’s a miracle Alander is as trim and fit as he is, considering the heaviness of his diet. It’s probably all the hours he spends having sex every day.
I smile thinking about what his fitness plan would look.
Warm up: Undress three girls and spread hot oil over their luscious bodies.
Cardio: Wrestle naked until each girl is pinned.
Core: Line them up, bend them over and fuck them all in turn until they scream.
Cool down: Shower together, letting the women tend to his fatigued muscles.
“Do you know why I like you so well?” Alander asks, his voice taking me by surprise because I’m envisioning this ridiculous workout regime.
“My charm and wit?” I say before sucking on a lobster tail. I wipe my lips and add, “Oh, and my willingness to let you think you control me?”
“No.” He leans across the table toward me. “It’s your honey-flavored tits and insatiable cunt.”
The unexpectedness of his answer makes me laugh. “Why, Alander, you sweet-talker.” I’m not sure he hears my put-on southern accent, but my sarcasm is loud and clear.
He grins, that new-fangled Alander grin that I don’t know what to make of and says, “Actually, it’s your ass I love best. I miss your ass, Tessa. I miss the way it blushes after I spank you for being so fucking disobedient.” He rubs his hands together suggestively. “If nothing else, I must have your ass.”
I throw my head back in laughter. “You won’t stop, will you?”
“No. I won’t. So, stop fighting me. Let’s get naked. Right now. We’ll fuck like a pair of ecstatic dolphins. Not bound by societal mores, no expectations, no attachment. Just plain old fun.”
I have to admit, the man is persuasive. Damn persuasive. But sex with Alander is never ‘plain’. In fact, my little imaginary workout routine would be too vanilla for Alander.
I roll my eyes and keep eating, ignoring his comments. Unfortunately, his words, and perhaps my thoughts, have heated up my body despite my objections.
Later, we take drinks up to the deck. With the wind off the water, the evening is cool and Alander finds a blanket tucked away in one of the many storage bins on deck to wrap around me. He sits close, snuggling me up beneath his arm.
“Do you want to know the real reason I like you so well?” he asks quietly.
Wow. I recognize this tone. It’s the one he uses in the dead of night, after a long session when we’re both tired and a little vulnerable.
“Okay,” I whisper more out of curiosity about what has brought on this transformation in Alander than anything else.
“You are the only person who doesn’t want anything from me.” He slants my chin toward him. “Do you know how refreshing that is?”
“What are you talking about? People bend over backwards for you, literally. I bet some of those girls are very bendy and give you whatever you want. You ask for submission and you get it.”
He rolls his eyes. “In the bedroom, yes of course, the girls you see here, they do whatever I ask.” With an arched brow, he adds, “You wouldn’t believe some of the things they will do, if you ever want to watch...”
I make a face, surprisingly having no desire to watch him with other women.
“You could learn a thing or two from these women.” It’s meant as a joke—I think—but his voice is too serious for it to come off properly.
“No thanks. I like pissing you off too much.” My attempt at levity falls short too, maybe because I’m so taken aback by the expression of fondness on his face as he looks at me.
“You do piss me off.” He says it like it’s a good thing. “Those others? They do exactly what I say, but, inside here,” he gently taps the side of my head, “they scheme. All of them. Constantly trying to figure out what they can do to make me do what they want. They don’t care about me, they care about my money, about diamond rings and ruby necklaces. They please me simply so that I’ll provide them with a life of luxury.” He sucks in an annoyed breath. “They are all the same.”
He smoothes the wisp of hair at my temple that is blowing in the breeze. “But you? You ask for nothing.”
“That’s because I have everything I want.”
“Yes.” His eyes crinkle with his smile. “That is so very rare.”
I shake my head, rendered speechless by his candor and tenderness.
He exhales a deep breath. “So, because you ask nothing, I want to give you everything. Things I’m not even capable of giving.”
“Alander,” I say, but he shushes me.
“It’s okay. I’m not going to force you into my bed...tonight.” He grins before his expression softens again. “I just want you to know the truth. I care for you, Tessa. I want you. I won’t pretend that I don’t.”
He stands and extends his hand. “But, I see in your eyes that you are tired and still sad. Perhaps tonight is too soon. Let me walk you to your cabin.”
Okay. Who is this Alander? Is this another of his many masks? Another trick to get me to submit?
I don’t know, but when he stops outside the door of my cabin and kisses me with more passion than he’s ever kissed me before, only to walk away, leaving me breathless, I start to wonder if maybe, for the first time, I’ve met the real Alander Papadakis.
***
By the time I wake up the next morning, the yacht is already on course after docking in Khios for the night. True to his word, Alander has rounded up his girlie-gaggle and sent them packing. I almost miss them, in the way I miss a certain item of clothing after I buy a new wardrobe and discard the old. Sometimes I’ve simply forgotten I’ve gotten rid of something, a pair of shoes for example. Once I realize the item’s gone, however, I don’t think of it again.
Alander spends most of the day holed up in his stateroom, working, and I decide to catch up on work myself. It’s while I’m texting my contact in London that I see unread messages in my inbox.
My finger hovers above the button to open the folder while my heart hammers against my breastbone.
I press the button. There are three messages from Nic
olai.
The first was sent yesterday afternoon. Probably around the time I was watching Dolphins play in the wake.
The next is from just after midnight.
The last one was from three in the morning.
Shit! I squeeze the bridge of my nose. My eyes are watering as I think of Nicolai’s first time with a random stranger. I want to text back and say, “I lied, Nicolai. I lied. If it’s with the right person, penetration is everything.”
I scrub a hand up and down my face at the thought of him. God I miss him. But the longer we’re apart, the more I see that I made the right decision by not meeting him at the castle, even if it was an inadvertent decision, made by exhaustion.
With each league that separates us, the more clearly I see our relationship for what it is, or was. A moment in time, not meant to go anywhere, but one I will remember always, with fondness and a little bit of sadness. I will never, ever forget Nicolai Kinellis.
I’m proud of myself right now because, so far, I’ve gone most of the day without thinking about him. At least not thinking about him as much as I did yesterday.
I think it’s partly Alander who’s helped to ease the ache that is Nicolai. I’m so very glad I decided to join Alander on his yacht. The problem is, although Alander has been helpful and being on the yacht is therapeutic, as soon as I start thinking about Nicolai, I can’t stop. All of the suppressed emotions from our encounter rise up with a vengeance and take the form of unspent arousal. I think of his face and my tummy tightens. I see his capable hands in my mind’s eye and my clit swells. I envision his striking eyes, full lips and sweet tongue and my nipples harden while my breath comes in short, sharp pants.
There is only one cure.
My vibrator.
After rummaging around in my luggage, I flop down onto my back, vibrator in one hand, taut nipple in the other.
The memory I return to is that last, fateful night in Molyvos. In my imagination, I don’t go to the taverna, so I don’t see Paulo which means I don’t kiss him and thus Nicolai doesn’t freak out. Instead, I stay at the guesthouse and wait for Nicolai to return. In this new scenario, I spend the time waiting for him much as I’m doing right now, on my bed, naked, with my vibrator.
Seduction in the Sun: Adult Romance Box Set (9 Sizzling Tales with BBW, Billionaires, Bad Boys, and Alpha Males) Page 60