I screamed until there was no air left in my lungs and they burned with the effort to take another breath in and my vision began to blur. Grabbing the sides of my head I fell back to my knees and sobs racked my body. I cried like I had never cried before, and I could feel Gordon and Sam watching me, feeling just as helpless as I did. With tears streaming down my face I let the sorrow take over. I wasn’t sure if anyone could help me at that point, but I knew Gordon would at least try. As predicted, I heard him rise from the place he had fallen and walk over to me, wrapping his arms around my shoulders and making gentle soothing sounds. One of his hands rose to smooth my hair and I found it comforting, but no matter what he did I couldn’t stop the choking sobs that caused my body to shake. I looked up at him and he was so close I could feel his warm breath on my face and it was a welcome sensation. I wanted to feel anything else but the emptiness of death.
“I didn’t have to kill her,” I said, shaking my head feverishly. That was truly how I felt. I didn’t have to kill her. She could’ve come up to the surface with us and killed Lilith herself to exact her revenge. If anything we could’ve done it together. We both had wrongs that needed to be righted and now she would never get the chance to see it.
“You did, honey. You had to. It’s what she wanted.” I continued to shake my head. I knew I didn’t have to just because she wanted it. I did it because that’s what I was made for. Killing was all I was good for.
I was putting all of my strength into pushing him away, but seemed to be so weak from the hurt and the pain that I could barely budge him. I screamed no over and over until it turned into a wordless and pitiful cry and I could no longer fight Gordon’s hold. I was breaking and I wasn’t even sure he could put me back together. I wasn’t even sure if I could do it myself. I was reduced to a whimpering thing tucked against his strong chest and he began to caress my hair again and make calming noises.
“Yes,” he said.
I wasn’t going to fight it anymore. He was right, and I knew it.
We can’t let her death be in vain. We have to get out of here and show Lilith that we don’t break easy.” He was right. I was broken now, but she didn’t have to know that. I decided in that moment that I was going to come back and shock her with strength and power and I would prove to her that I was unstoppable. That I was unbreakable and I would always come out on top.
“You’re right.” He loosened his hold on me enough so I could turn and look into his eyes and there was something there that shook me. It was something I had never seen before. He had something to prove too and we would do it together. I also saw a shift take place behind his eyes like a living creature, but it didn’t scare me. I couldn’t be the only one with a beast inside of me that fought for control. I had never seen his until now, but I was sure I would be seeing it again.
He was looking deep into my eyes and I could’ve fallen into those dark orbs without a care in the world. I felt my cold body warm as his hand rested on my belly and stayed there. I nodded and smiled up at him. He quickly stood as he smiled back at me with that same crooked smile that I fell in love with to begin with, and reached his hand out to me to help me stand.
Sam had been silent the whole time and once I was on my feet I glanced at her. Her face was pale, eyes wide with unshed tears, and she hadn’t moved a muscle. Hell, I had almost forgotten about her she was so quiet. I walked slowly to her and waved my hand in the air in a “come on” motion. We had to keep trucking if we wanted to foil Lilith’s plan of world domination and the first step to that goal was in the pit. She didn’t move.
“Sam,” I said. I was literally inches from her face and she didn’t notice me. I took a glance back at Gordon and he shrugged, walking up to the both of us in long and even strides. This was the first time I had noticed that Sam’s nose was bleeding and she had a busted lip. I would apologize for that once I could get her to notice that we were there. “Sam!” I practically yelled. She seemed to snap out of it then and her eyes drifted slowly to me and when they met mine recognition flared in them. It was almost like she was seeing me for the first time.
“I’ve never seen anything like that before,” she said, her voice coming out in a whisper. Tears were forming at the rims of her eyes and one fell down her cheek. It left a trail through the ash and grim that covered her skin.
“Well, get used to it because you’re going to be seeing a lot of it if you want a piece of Lilith,” I said. It was harsh but true. “The first leg of the journey to get to her is in that hole over there.” I turned and pointed to the pit and her eyes followed the line of my pointing finger. Her eyes were glassy with tears as I looked back at her. I dropped my arm to my side and knew to get her to get moving I would have to be tough as nails and that was the aspect of me no one was going to like. I would holster that until I absolutely needed it. I had already been driven to the point and shattering and came back and so could she.
He sighed and stated, “I’ll go first.” She began to walk hurriedly to the pit in long strides. Gordon followed closely behind, watching every single move I made like I would break. I grabbed her arm and turned her to face me.
“Sam, you need to understand something. The surface isn’t going to be the same. Lilith has been going unchecked and who knows what it’ll look like. I need you to be prepared for the absolute worst because we can’t have this happen again.”
“Have what happen again?” she asked, a smirk spreading across her lips. She was being sarcastic and wouldn’t look me in the eye.
“You can’t freeze and zone out like you just did. We’re going to need you to be ready to take on whatever is up there because we are going up there blind.” I moved closer to her, trying to get her to actually look at me. She wouldn’t and began to struggle against me. “I know this is hard.”
She stopped struggling to get out of my grasp and looked at me and it seemed she finally realized that she had completely frozen in the presence of my power. How could we effectively work together if she froze every time I set something on fire? Gordon was behind me. I could feel a slight prickle of his energy along the nape of my neck and down my arms. He was beginning to get upset because of Sam’s unwillingness to listen and I had to say I couldn’t blame him, but it looked like she was finally starting to see the light.
“I won’t freeze again,” she said in a whisper. I wanted to believe her, but I wasn’t sure if I could.
“You better not because it’s going to be the last chance you get,” “Gordon said from behind me. “I can’t have you risking our lives and the life of our unborn child. That’s not something I am prepared to tolerate. Once things get hairy we need you to hold yourself together or we’re going to have to cut you loose and you’ll be on your own. It’s going to be a different place there now and we need you, if you want to stay with us, to get yourself together.”
How much experience have you actually had killing vampires and the like?” I asked. This information was going to be paramount because I needed to know what I was going to have to teach her. I was honestly hoping I wouldn’t have to teach her anything at all. If she knew how to avoid the big nasties she could and not have to kill a single thing down here. She looked at me like she didn’t understand the question.
“Well, when I was on the surface I killed daily. Not just vampires but other things. Since coming here I haven’t had to do much. I was able to keep myself as invisible as possible so I may be a little rusty and may be weaker than I used to be. My power depends on my number of kills.”
I nodded, considering what she just told me. A little rusty I could deal with, but we’d see just how rusty once we were out of the pit. It was going to be an out of the fire and into the frying pan kind of thing I was sure, but we didn’t live this life because it was easy or fun. We did it because we were called, we were destined. Hell, if we didn’t do it who would?
“We’re going to need you to fight as hard as you can. It is our job to save everyone from the monsters. Can you do that?” I s
aid all of this with an absolute certainty. I needed her to say she could so I didn’t feel so lost. I would have to leave her behind if she couldn’t, and I didn’t want to have to do that. We needed as many able hands as we could get and I was hoping I could count her in.
“Yes, I can,” she said in complete earnest, nodding. I reached my consciousness out to her to see if she was indeed telling me the truth. I could feel the resolve inside of her and the strength.
“Good. Good,” I said as I took her hand in mine and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “Now, let’s get up there and kick some ass, huh?” I said it with a smile. She nodded in response. I dropped her hand and began to walk to the edge of the pit, Sam and Gordon following close behind. As soon as I got to it I took a chance glance over the edge. All I could see was writhing fire and there was a rush of hot air that blew my hair away from my face in a rush and caused my eyes to become dry and burn. I backed away from it and turned to Sam whose eyes were wide with fear and she was shaking with anticipation. I could tell she wasn’t sure whether to be scared or not.
“You’re going first. We’ll come in right behind you. I promise,” I said to her as she looked over the edge and down into the fiery chasm. I took another look at it and could honestly say I didn’t blame her for being nervous. I took a step toward her with the knife in my hand. She took a step back away from me and the menacing blade, hands out in a pleading motion.
“What are you doing?” she asked, her eyes wide with fear.
“It needs blood to work just like when Lilith came through, but I promise we won’t need as much as she took from you.” She still didn’t look like she trusted me. “I promise.” I let the words flow out and caress her, letting her feel that I wasn’t going to hurt her like Lilith had. Granted, it would sting, but there wouldn’t be a scar left over this time.
She reached her arm out to me and I was shocked to see it was the one with the scar. I almost thought about asking for her other arm, but I didn’t. If she was willing to use this one again then we would use it. I wasn’t going to question it. I took the blade and set it against her warm skin, holding her arm still with my free hand. I dug the blade across her skin and she hissed in pain, but didn’t jerk away.
I led her even closer to the edge of the pit and coerced her to hold her arm over the gaping hole. The first drop fell into the pit and you could feel the power build and it seemed like it was trying to escape from its fiery prison and pull us over the edge. Just the feel of the power alone caused me to gasp, and the pit wasn’t even open for me at the moment. It was opening for Sam and Sam alone.
As I watched her blood flow it was like it was all happening in slow motion. A few more drops and the pit flared to life, wind and heat blaring up out of the chasm. Blue flames were lining the edges of the pit and dancing to their sensual and devilish song. I looked back to Sam and gave her a nod.
“Remember, we’ll be right behind you,” I reassured her. She nodded in response and took her first step towards the pit. Then another, and another until she was over the edge and falling through the portal and to the surface. I thought I heard a scream as she was swept away in the power of the pit, but I couldn’t be sure. The wind, heat, and power were gone and it was like it had never happened.
Gordon and I faced each other and I handed him the blade, hilt first and he took it without hesitation. I wanted him to open the flow of blood because I knew he wouldn’t hesitate to do so like I would. It was always easier when someone else did it.
“Let’s do this.” I was as ready as I would ever be and even though I was terrified of what lie beyond that pit of heat and light, I knew it was our only way home.
Chapter 32: Home Free
Gordon just stared at me as we stood face to face in front of the pit. The knife I placed into his hand was glinting in the soft glow. He didn’t want to hurt me, but this was the only way and if I tried to do it myself I knew I would lose my nerve. I may have been the big and bad Executioner, but I wasn’t made of stone.
I placed my hand on his hovering arm and said, “Gordon, I need you to do this.” I took his other hand and placed it on that part of my belly where our little bean was. “We need you to do this.” I know that was low, but I needed to give him the gusto to get the job done and fast. There was no way around it. His eyes darted back to me and their darkness was piercing mine like a laser. “Gordon, please. If I do it I’ll lose my nerve and we’ll never get back home.”
He nodded in response and opened his mouth to say something, but didn’t say a word. How could I get him to do this? If that wasn’t enough than what would be? When I was really beginning to doubt him he grabbed my arm almost begrudgingly and rested the blade against my skin. I almost jerked away from it knowing that pain was coming, and Gordon would be the one to deliver it. He held my arm in place and his grasp tightened almost to the point of pain itself without even having to use the blade. My eyes never left his and I could see the resolve in them as well as the fear.
“You can do this,” I stated. There was no shaking in my voice and no detectable amount of fear in its inflection.
With his dark eyes focused on mine he dug the blade across my skin and I let the pain out in a hiss from between my lips. This wasn’t the worst pain I had ever been in and it wouldn’t be the end of it so this I could handle. I let out a breath in a rush and took my arm from him to hold it over the pit, blood running down my arm in bright crimson rivulets as the glow from the fires below bounced off of its wetness. The pit flared to life as I held my arm over its abyss, blue flames rising over the edges of the open earth in front of us.
I felt the power of the pit building within me and I knew what I had to do next to Gordon could make the journey with me. The pit was giving me my instructions. I brought my arm back from over the edge and rolled my fingers through the blood pooling and running down my arm. Gordon’s face and eyes flooded with confusion as he watched me, eyes intent on the blood that was now coating my fingers. I reached up towards his face with my blood covered hand and he flinched away from me like he thought I was about to slap him.
“Trust me,” I said as I looked into his eyes, letting him know that this was what had to be done if he wanted to come with me. He was a demon and this portal was made for Executioners so my blood could hide the fact that he wasn’t one of us.
With that power guiding me I spread my blood on Gordon’s face. Then I felt the power build even more and my heart began to race. The beast became even more active and the network and map of glowing veins began to snake their way under my skin and the heat was beginning to flow through my body like a flood. I couldn’t help but let out a sigh. The same glow began to poll in the center of Gordon’s chest and I placed my hand over it, feeling that same power within me building inside of him. His eyes widened as he felt it rising within him and his eyes turned into bright orbs of amber as I watched his expression change from one of fear to one of wonder. It was the same wonder I was beginning to feel as Gordon began to turn into a bright ball of light and flow like liquid into my hand, through my arm, and came to rest in the center of my chest where my heart was beating frantically. The light in my chest glowed even brighter then and was pulsating with my heart beat. I could feel Gordon inside of me resting with my beast within my ribcage. It was the most surreal thing I had ever felt as his power and my own enveloped each other and roared to life along with the power of the pit and I began to shake violently, needing release as soon as possible.
I turned to the pit and the flames flared to greet me and wrapped me in their bright warmth as I took a step forward and let myself fall into it. The fire wrapped around me like it was welcoming me and I began to wonder if the pit had welcomed Sam with such an acknowledgement. The colors of the flames around me ranged from orange, to green, and to blue and the sight around me was the most beautiful I had ever seen. The flames ebbed and pulsated around me as I fell, the wind whipping my hair around my face as I reached maximum velocity and it stung slightly.
My heart was racing at an unfathomable speed as I felt Gordon’s energy and power coil around it and come to rest in its apex and as I let the fire take me home I knew with absolute certainty that we could save the world from Lilith’s deathly grasp. I closed my eyes and let the flames take me over and I rode the power as it flowed through me and around me, wrapping me in succulent heat. The beast roared inside of me once more and rode the power with me, letting its presence be known. I could feel a change in the air around me. It became cooler and I opened my eyes and looked down to see a hole of darkness signaling the end of our journey through the pit and the door home. Within seconds the darkness was all I could see and as it enveloped me the flames and the power began to fade away, the wind stopped, and the blackness was all that was left.
Chapter 33: Darkness Rising
The darkness was overwhelming and the silence was deafening. All I could hear was my own heart thudding against my ribcage and my blood pumping in my ears. I was beginning to worry about the suddenness of the loss of power and I could no longer feel Gordon inside of me. Then I felt it within my chest and it began to grow. The heat was coming back as was the pulsating light and I could feel Gordon there again and relief washed over me.
The light from within me opened me up to a terrifying sight. I could see white silk along the ceiling and walls of the small enclosed space and I recognized it quickly. I was in a coffin. I couldn’t say I was shocked that Beth had laid me to rest, but had she even tried to bring me back? I looked down and could see I was outfitted in a white flowing dress made of silk as well with some high heels to match.
Follow the Screams (The Executioner Trilogy Book 2) Page 18