He spun around. “Real nice place you got here, teacher,” he said in a kind of lazy tone. He grinned with a small lift at the corners of his mouth.
Was he mocking her? She really had no idea. “Uh, thanks?” She stepped into the living room from the small eating nook. “It can’t be your style.”
“Well…nooo. Last I checked, I wouldn’t have bought a floral pillow to decorate my couch, but for you? It’s nice and pretty, just like you. You put a lot of time and energy into it. You seem like you got all your shit together. That’s real admirable.”
Again, was he mocking her? Or flirting with her? Or was it simply an observation? She didn’t know and her forehead scrunched as she tried to make sense of the big, smiling, yet kind of brutish man standing in middle of her white, blue and yes, floral and candle themed living room. He looked so wrong there. Like taking a small kitten and setting it in someone’s S&M room. Glancing at Shane, she could almost see him as one of those doms in a room like that. All leather and biker and…
She turned to stop her strange, meandering thoughts about Shane. A weird tingle went down her arms. She definitely noticed Shane, and was almost hyperaware of his every breath, it seemed. She could sense when his eyes moved about the room, or settled on her, or when he simply dropped his arms and let them hang at his side. She felt a hyperawareness with him; or was it because some kind of opposites were attracting? Yet she could never classify it as flirtatious attraction. No. No way. It went way beyond any description of what she thought of Shane.
Still, he was so much to be around. He overwhelmed the room, her house, her classroom, and her. She found his mere presence simply overbearing. Masculine, intimidating, and just so stinking big, there was no ignoring him.
“Yes, I am pretty together.”
“Adult-like, huh? Mature? Responsible? Pay all your bills on time and always in full?”
She scowled at him. He made it sound like bad a thing. “Yes. I would think as someone who teaches your valley’s youth, you’d consider those admirable traits.”
“Oh, they are,” he said, his grin still lurking on his lips. How infuriating! Was he mocking her? She couldn’t really respond to it or his comment.
“So what exactly is this?” Allison finally asked. Shane just turned and started inspecting her house some more. Not what she expected from the flirty biker. He examined her house with such care, like another woman might have. Not like a man hiding out from his lover’s husband.
“This?” Shane’s eyebrows popped up again.
“Well, you know, Jett is coming? Can’t you just leave now? Go out my front door? There isn’t any reason for you to hang out here.”
He shrugged and walked to her front window. Setting aside the lacy, privacy drape, he leaned over to peek out. “Jett just pulled in. Damn. No wonder Celia was freaking out.” He kept watching them, and saw Celia open the front door before hugging Jett in wife-like warmth. Did it bother Shane? Did his heart twist in jealousy? Anger? Possessiveness? Regret? Hurt? Anything? Did he feel anything about doing that to another man?
“Doesn’t it bother you?” Allison finally asked when she could no longer restrain herself.
Shane dropped the lace and straightened up. “Does what bother me?”
“Seeing them together? Cheating? Lying? Anything? Does anything bother you?”
“Lots of things bother me. But I don’t cheat. I don’t lie. And no, it doesn’t bother me who Celia is hugging.”
“Oh, really? How do you figure you don’t lie? Or cheat? Isn’t that the whole reason you’re in my house?”
Shane’s entire posture stiffened and his mouth turned into a deep frown. She stepped back in surprise, realizing only then she might have offended him. She didn’t think that was possible. “Well, now no. I never told anyone I was f—sleeping with you. I never cheated on anyone, ever. I don’t make those kinds of commitments. I tell a woman exactly what I’m about, and it’s never a long-term dating relationship. It’s just sex. Good, fun sex for an evening. Sometimes, it happens more than once, but I’m never exclusive with any of them. And I never lie about that. That was all Celia’s decision to lie to her husband. Her relationship. She’s the liar and the cheater, not me. If I ever chose to make that commitment, that would be it: to only one person. However, since I don’t want to make that commitment, it would never happen. It’s not on me if Celia chooses to be the kind of person that makes those commitments and doesn’t keep them.”
“Do you have some kind of twisted moral code about cheating?” Allison asked. Her facial expression could not mask her total shock at Shane’s take on what he was doing.
“Yeah, I don’t do it.”
“But, isn’t that just a technicality? You knowingly engage in—in relations with women who you know for a fact are married. You are the other ‘man.’ I don’t see how you include that as part of your ‘code.’”
“Those are their actions, and their decisions. Not mine. I can’t control what they do, much less presume to dictate what their morals or behaviors should be. I control mine, and I make it quite clear what mine are. No one crosses my boundaries. I decide what is right and wrong for me. And I never lie or cheat. If Jett asked me if I ever had sex with his wife, I’d tell him yes. If he asked if I was sleeping with you, I’d say no.”
“But you wouldn’t volunteer any of that information. You must run into Jett all the time; it’s a small, nosy town. You don’t willingly discuss your relationship with his wife to him, now do you? So you get off with semantics. You choose how you present yourself. You’re not really as honest and pure as you portray. You can’t pretend your actions don’t have direct consequences on other people. And sleeping with married women has total and long-lasting effects that can be devastating for the husbands.”
Shane’s mouth puckered up as if he were deep in thought. “Point taken. I guess, yeah, I guess you’re right. My theory has no room for worry or care about what the consequences of my actions are for other people.”
“Do you know Jett?”
His mouth was definitely scowling at her now. “Yeah. I know him.”
“He’s a perfectly nice, decent man. He doesn’t deserve to be played like such a fool. Or is there something about him I don’t know?”
To her surprise, Shane shifted his weight from one foot to the next. “No. Not that I know of. I never ask about their marriage.”
“Obviously,” she mumbled as she bypassed him and headed towards the front door. “Look, if Jett ever asks me, I won’t lie to him about anything. Not for you, or for Celia. I won’t lie by omission either.”
“Are you going to tell him?”
“Why shouldn’t I?” She whirled around and glared at him. “Why shouldn’t I put the poor man out of his misery for not understanding what his marriage really is?”
Shane started to smile as he stepped after her. “You sure get riled up. Much more than I first might have guessed, teacher. You usually appear so calm and cool and sophisticated. And then… this. You’re kind of…”
“Moralistic, decent, upstanding… and not an asshole?” she interrupted, smiling sweetly. Shane let out a bark of laughter. She couldn’t quite get him pissed off.
“Yeah, those things, definitely. Not an asshole? Is that directed at me?”
“Yes,” she answered honestly.
“I’m not an asshole,” he muttered as he came closer. She grabbed the front door handle and clicked the door open as his intimidating bulk started to close in on her.
“Matter of opinion,” she smiled sweetly, holding the door open.
He stepped out. “Is this your request that I leave?”
“You think?” she rolled her eyes.
He smirked. “I’ll change your opinion of me. You’ll see.” He leaned in and said it almost right into her ear, causing an embarrassing heat that rose up from her chest. “Until then, I’ll see you next time I come over.”
With a salute, he spun on his foot and took the steps off her front s
toop.
“Wait? Next time?” He turned at her startled exclamation. “You’re coming back to repeat all this? Even after…” She let her sentence trail off when she noticed Jett coming out his front door and walking to his car. Shutting her mouth in frustration, she felt like she was part of some mean-hearted conspiracy. Jett lifted his head when he heard her voice and waved. There was a long hedge separating their properties that was as high as her chin. She waved back, feeling like she was stabbing Jett in the heart with her duplicity. Jett simply turned back to open his car door and pull a suitcase out of it. How could Shane stand to do that?
“See? Very nice man,” she hissed at Shane. He didn’t turn to look at Jett. As if that somehow kept him from having to face what he was doing.
“I never said he wasn’t.”
“You should care what you’re doing to him.” She was careful to keep her tone quiet and low.
“If he were a bad guy. If he lied and cheated, or… hell! What if he was a drunken asshole? Would it be okay then? Do you care because he’s so nice, or because what I’m doing is so wrong?”
She flinched. “Don’t put a spin on this. What you’re doing is so wrong. And you should care more,” she hissed. “Jett’s innocence and being undeserving just makes it all kind of worse.”
“Again, a matter of opinion, teacher.”
“How can you cross my lawn and go into his driveway with full knowledge you’ve just—” Allison lost the nerve to spew out what she really wanted to say. She longed to punctuate how despicable she truly felt his actions were.
Shane studied her before a small smile crossed his lips. “You’ve had someone cheat on you before, didn’t you?”
“I don’t have to experience it to understand the clear-cut wrongness of cheating.” He was fishing way too close to home for her, making her anxiety level rise, as well as her voice.
“Shh,” he snapped as he glanced around when she nearly shouted cheating. “Unless of course, you want to be the one to tell Jett. I guess that’s fine, but it might make future neighbor relations awkward.”
“That is so cold.”
He shrugged. “Wouldn’t be the first husband to find out about me. But come on, teacher, the passion you feel about this? Clearly, you have a biased opinion.”
“Clearly. I could not possibly deem it wrong for the sake of morality, now could I?”
He eyed her with a soft smile. “I think there’s some history there.”
“Goodbye, Shane,” she answered in a toneless voice.
“Goodbye, teacher,” he mumbled, “It’s been surprisingly entertaining.”
He hopped over the small fence that encircled her yard and took his huge bike off its stand. Seconds later, it roared to life before he took off, sending dust and gravel spraying all around him. She watched his bike glint in the evening sunlight. Shaking her head in amazement at such gall, she shut the door on him.
She was still confused over her choice not to explain to Jett that his marriage was in shambles. Whether he deserved it or not, she had no idea, but she still didn’t believe it was the fairest way to treat the guy. She turned and picked up the half empty glass left by Shane and dumped out the contents. A small, lingering smile stayed on her lips at the man’s utter audacity. He had gall, she’d give him that.
****
Teacher was a little edgier than her appearance suggested. Going along with Celia’s crazy idea, without any warning or preparation, was pretty ballsy of her. Shane slowed his bike as he hit River Road, the long dirt lane that led to his family’s farm. It followed the Rydell River for many miles, hence the name, River Road. The driveway was full of potholes so he had to guide his bike around the various obstacles. He found it kind of fun to swerve and sway to avoid everything.
Stopping the beast, he pushed it into his shop where he kept it out of the elements. It was a custom Harley with black paint and a killer skull-and-crossbones design in subtle little snippets that were repeated throughout the paint job.
The shop was dark until he flipped the light on. He coughed at all the dust. There sat an old Ford truck from the 1950s that he was getting restored for a man who found it buried in one of his old barns. It was caked in rat and mice feces. Birds had even nested in it, and ants infested it, making it a real shit storm to even clean up. But Shane was halfway through it now. He had it all cleaned up and primed for paint. The engine was a brand new and still to be mounted, and it would soon have custom exhaust and suspension.
He threw his helmet onto one of the workbenches and walked out of the shop and into the house. “Ben?”
There was shuffling and thumping before Ben came sauntering down the main staircase. “Hey, Shane.”
He had dropped the Uncle Shane last year. Ben was now eighteen years old and it still surprised Shane when Ben came into a room. He’d grown into a tall, strapping man, not the gangly boy he used to be barely two years ago. He had filled out in his shoulders and torso, and looked a lot like his dad. Freakily, he was a younger, fresher version of Jack Rydell.
“Where’s Charlie?” He left Ben strict instructions to watch over Charlie while he was visiting Celia this afternoon. One nice thing about Shane’s life was he had no one’s schedule to keep but his own. No boss nagged him to come to work, or to report to a stuffy building for X number of hours. He worked whenever the hell he wanted to, and for however the hell long he wanted.
“Out hanging with AJ while he’s working that new foal.”
“Oh. That’s right. Forgot about that.” He might have purposely forgotten; he wasn’t sure. He rarely even listened to the management of the horses or got involved in their breeding, training, and boarding. AJ and Jack were responsible for that. Ben was starting to take a heavy load off Jack. More power to him in Shane’s eyes. It still made him shudder whenever he thought of having to be the one to carry that load, and at only eighteen years old. Shane was just glad no one ever looked to him to be the one. Or hold any real responsibility, to be honest. This keeping an eye on the nephews thing for three weeks was probably the most he’d ever been asked to do that wasn’t something he wanted to do. Even today, when Celia called, he almost forgot that Charlie would soon be home and he had to make sure Charlie wasn’t alone. Jack’s rules, even if the kid was old enough in Shane’s eyes. It was a safety thing as far as Jack was concerned.
The house was so fuckin’ quiet nowadays. Shane sat down and stretched his long legs out before him as a deep sigh escaped his chest. It used to be guys everywhere. Now? Just the kids and him. It really felt quiet with Jack and Erin gone.
Shane knew that was being hypocritical. He left more often than anyone. He was gone for weeks, sometimes months at a time. And when he returned, and he always did, although he often wished he didn’t feel so obligated to, but when he returned, his family used to all be here.
Now? Only the skeleton crew of his family remained.
He should’ve heated something up. Ian and Jack were so much better about meals than he. Except Ian decided to start dating the damn housekeeper so there was no one to make anything for dinner now. Just him. Shane didn’t like having domestic responsibility foisted on him, but he more hated the house being so empty.
“I should make something, huh? Like hot food? Probably three nights of cold cereal is too many?” he asked Ben, his tone sounding dejected.
Ben laughed and sat down across from him. “Weird around here without Ian and Dad.”
“Feels like the fu—I mean the damn soul of the house drove away with both of them. I mean… I’m just not the backbone of this place. That’s Jack and Ian’s job. Me? I’m supposed to visit and stay, but when I drive off, no one feels empty.” He said the f-word too much around the boys, and Jack had been riding his ass for years.
“It does. I really never thought Ian would leave,” Ben said in a solemn tone. He was starting to display more and more of his dad’s serious demeanor and Ian’s reserve. He wasn’t the loud, happy kid of sixteen anymore. Shane was already m
issing it.
“Fuc—I mean, damn love. It messes up everything,” Shane muttered.
Ben smiled. “It brought me into the world and Charlie and Erin here. So it can’t be all bad.”
“It makes people falsely believe they can sustain an unrealistic state of being for the long term. Monogamy.” Shane shuddered. “Never for me. No way. No how.” He debated whether or not he should admit that to his teenage nephew and added, “Oh, hey, you shouldn’t feel that way though.”
’Cause Jack would kill him, Shane thought with a cringe. Ben laughed.
“Can I ask you something, long as no one else is here?”
“No one’s ever here anymore,” Shane mumbled. “But sure, what’s up?”
“You won’t tell my dad?”
Shane’s back snapped straighter. Not tell Jack? That was one way to get his ass reamed out if his big bro ever found out. But Ben’s face was serious and solemn as he peered at him. Like whatever it was meant something really important to Ben. “Okay, long as you’re not in mortal danger, or committing a crime, I guess I can keep quiet.”
Ben scooted forward and leaned his elbows on the table. “I was wondering about… well, if you could tell me how I could hook a girl up with some birth control.”
Shane’s mouth dropped opened and stayed there. “Uh, why the shit would you think I’d know anything about that? And why would you need to? Just use a condom. Better to have your own guarantee than to trust the word of a girl who might not be as trustworthy as you hope she is.” Of course, the obvious question that perched on the tip of Shane’s tongue was: when did Ben start having sex?
Ben leaned forward, staring at his fingertips, which were laced together on the table top. He glanced up at Shane and then looked back down. Shane could almost feel Ben’s blush, which was turning his neck and ears pink. “There’s someone. We’ve been together for a while now. We do use condoms, but we’d like to… not. We’re all clean and everything. Both virgins and all that when we got together. Birth control is the answer. But her parents, they won’t, you know, help her. I thought maybe you’d know since you sleep with so many women and all…” Ben’s voice trailed off. Shane wasn’t sure if he should feel offended or honored.
River's Return (River's End Series, #3) Page 3