Allison was so far from being considered fascinating. She was more like a robot: cold and calculating. The motivation and inspiration she once felt about teaching were mostly gone. Every ambition that urged her to keep helping kids was now no more than an afterthought, a leftover reaction. With no other skills besides teaching, Allison used teaching to fill up her time. It made the days go by. And she was heading towards… what? She often wondered what. Where could her life possibly be headed now? The long, dark abyss in front of her seemed endless.
With Shane, however, at least it was more interesting.
“So this is quite a spot your family owns here. I’ve never been past the driveway and house.”
His expression changed. “Do you want to look around?”
She nodded. “If I’m not disturbing you?”
He snorted. “First time I’ve worked on a Sunday in many, many years. So, no, you’re not disturbing me. It’ll still be there later.”
She wished she could go through life with that kind of careless ease. It’ll be there later? That clashed with every urge that dictated her life. She had to finish her work, or chores, or errands, or favors for others, and her responsibilities always came first. She always finished her business issues before she ever did anything enjoyable, or fun, or relaxing, or fulfilling.
They were two very different kinds of people, but Allison longed to see a working horse ranch if only for the education it provided.
She followed Shane out of the shop and he walked her into the barn. It was a huge structure with endless stalls and the frequent, yet soothing, grunts and snorts and stomping of several horses. “Meet Erin and Jack’s babies.” He waved his hand out like ta-da.
She wandered around, petting a nose here, or combing a mane between her fingers there behind the stall doors. “You really have no interest in them? None at all?”
Shane stood with his legs spread and his hands on his hips. The leather vest he wore was about as uncowboy-like as her wearing a dress and heels. “I really do not.”
“That’s too bad. I’d love to ride one. I haven’t ridden since I was a girl.” She expressed a small flutter of interest.
“You can ride? And you like doing it?”
His voice sounded so full of reproach, she had to laugh before rubbing the long muzzle of a black horse. “Yes, I like it. And stop making it sound like I just confessed to being a porn star. As part owner in a horse farm, you should have more appreciation for them. They are beautiful, magnificent living creatures.”
“…That smell, and they crap everywhere. I mean, smell that?” He shuddered while plugging his nose.
“They are so beautiful. My uncle used to have horses when I was a teen. I spent some time out there riding. I miss it. I haven’t done it in years.”
Shane sighed as he dropped his arms to his sides and his shoulders sagged. “Well, I can ride the fuckers. Have been since I was five years old. Dad spent a good three years trying to break me of my aversion. I can ride ‘em just fine. I suppose I could take you out sometime. I know a lot of people really like riding horses. So I suppose we could.”
His expression looked more like she just suggested spending the afternoon at a high tea, or trying on bridal gowns. He looked resigned to a miserable afternoon. She was both surprised and shocked he even offered. Glancing at the horse next to her, she decided they were all gorgeous. Of course, she’d never call them fuckers, or refer to them with such disdain. It was almost a compliment that he was willing to suffer through it for her, just because she expressed some interest.
“Oh, look at my shoes. And you really don’t like them at all, so…”
He sighed. “That’s a real stupid reason for you not to enjoy ‘em. I’ll take you. It’s not that big of deal. I just don’t love it. I’ve never felt the need to eat, breath and sleep horse like my two brothers do. But I can spend a few hours without complaining. Your shoes, by the way, are fine. We’ll stay on easy trails.”
Allison struggled with her temptation. It was so much stronger than usual. Her flat shoes were black leather, but that posed no huge problem.
“Well… I mean, I would like to, but…”
Shane was instantly turning before thumping around in the back of what she thought was the tack room. He brought out two saddles, precariously balanced on each shoulder, and dumped them on the ground at her feet. She winced. Jack would have, no doubt, had a conniption if he could see how offhandedly Shane was treating their gear. Shane disappeared again, and returned with halters and bridles. “Can you saddle both of them?”
Shane stopped, and his expression reflected complete reproach. “I did grow up on a horse farm. Geez, teacher, I’m not an imbecile. You never forget how to saddle a horse, especially after doing it for half your life.”
She bit her lips, suddenly contrite for insulting his intelligence, even if it were by accident. “I’m sorry. It’s been years for me, and I wouldn’t remember.”
He nodded. “Well, you shouldn’t. You probably haven’t done it a few hundred times.”
“I thought you said you never liked riding? A few hundred times?”
“Everyone believed if I rode often enough, eventually, I might learn to like it. They acted like I was missing some kind of gene, or was a changeling because I showed no interest in horses. Dad especially refused to believe me. So yeah, I had to do it at least a few hundred times.”
That would make a kid resentful she thought. Maybe if they hadn’t shoved it down his throat so ceaselessly, Shane might have developed a passing, or mild interest. “Surely not every one of you were expected to be passionate about the ranch and horses.”
“Oh surely, every one of us were expected to be. I didn’t mind the chores, I just never had their drive or passion or whatever Jack and Ian and Dad all shared with horses. I just… didn’t care that much about them.”
She watched him go into a stall and halter a horse before leading it out and tying it to the hitching post. “Thank you, Shane, for doing this with me.”
He paused and glanced back at her serious, meaningful tone. She was really grateful. “You are welcome. I don’t mind riding with someone if you’re interested. It’s not like you’re making me do it.”
She smiled and he kind of blinked before slowly smiling back. “You have a real pretty smile, teacher. Anyone ever tell you that?”
Thank God, the barn was gloomy. The big doors weren’t open, and Allison was glad for that. She was blushing right down to the roots of her hair. Simply from his nice compliment about her smile. It was the husky, unusually quiet tone of voice Shane used that got to her. No. She couldn’t remember anyone telling her that, and certainly not in the suggestive way he just did. She grew hot and bothered by his attention and didn’t know how she should react.
Shane quickly and efficiently brushed the two horses briefly before throwing blankets across their backs and saddling them. Allison grabbed any miscellaneous items she could find, trying to help. She followed Shane out into the afternoon sun, which was overly bright now after the gloom of the barn. Hoisting herself up onto the horse, she was glad Shane held the reins for her. With his oil-stained clothes and long hair, he didn’t fit into any ideal of a cowboy she’d ever seen. As she scooted around in the saddle and dug her heels into the stirrups, she tried to remember how to find her center of balance. There was no way to look very elegant while doing so. He nodded. “All good?”
“Yes, I think so.” She had enough equestrian experience to know she could handle the horse. Shane swung up onto his saddle and set the heels of his black shoes into the horse’s side before they were off. He rode in front, heading down the long driveway and then across the main dirt road before meandering into the hills above the ranch. They followed the road for a mile or so before he cut across an open meadow dotted with sparse pine trees. They rode along in companionable silence, he leading, she right behind. Sometimes, he looked back to see how she was doing, or to point out something of interest on the trail, or just a
pretty view. Magnificent panoramas were everywhere in the mountains and farther off, where the tips of glaciers topped the Cascades. They rode for almost two hours before they returned to the ranch and dismounted. Allison grimaced, trying to refrain from rubbing her sore butt where she already felt the stiffness settling in.
Shane grinned. “Saddle sore?”
“Yes. After so many years.”
Shane hastily unsaddled and rubbed down both horses. He didn’t tarry around with any of the necessary protocol after riding. He wasn’t mean to them, not in the least, but he failed to have any other interest in them. He didn’t interact with them or talk to them. He acted like brushing them down was equivalent to washing a truck or car. They were just another means of travel to Shane. He took her because he wanted to please her. It kind of made her opinion of him rise.
They stood together, both leaning against the paddock after releasing the two horses into one of the pastures. The horses instantly ran off, frolicking and kicking their legs high like little kids let loose at recess. Allison grinned as she watched them. “I don’t know how anyone can miss their unique personalities and loyalty. But I’m glad you took me. I might have to ask Erin to take me more often.”
Shane turned from the horses to watching her. “You don’t have to ask Erin to ride. I’m perfectly capable of taking you whenever you want to go.”
“But you said you don’t—”
“I like ‘em well enough. I just don’t like everyone telling me I have to like them. You don’t tell me that. So it’s fine.” His answer was curt and almost grumpy. He was scowling at her. She shut her lips tightly. Okay, then. She wasn’t sure what set his little tantrum off. But he seemed to like her company, and that was an interesting concept.
“Well, I still think it would make Erin feel better as a sort of payment for tutoring.”
“You don’t always have to make everyone else feel better.”
“What crawled up your leg and bit it?”
His eyebrows jutted up and he let out a sharp laugh. “Is that even an expression?”
“It’s my expression. Why did you get so grumpy?”
“I just think if you want to ride you can do so with me.” He shrugged and turned as if that were the end of the discussion. “So… what are you doing the rest of today?”
She sighed. “Well, my yard needs a good trim and mowing, but I spent so long here… I’ll probably have to get to it next weekend. I don’t know, just have dinner, do some reading. Things I’m sure you wouldn’t do for the evening.”
He grinned. “True. But I could mow the lawn for you. Seems only fair since you were here; and I don’t have anything set in stone to do tomorrow. How about it?”
“You don’t have to do that.”
“I don’t mind. After all the flack I caused you with your neighbors… call it my way of making restitution.”
She bit her lip. It would be nice. She didn’t like mowing. And she had to work all day. So… sure, she’d let Shane mow the lawn.
“Okay, deal.”
Shane put his hand out. “Deal. See you then.”
Chapter Seven
GOOD TO HIS WORD, the next afternoon, Shane showed up to mow Allison’s lawn. She was still kind of shocked by his gesture. He handled the small mower around her yard like it was a pint-sized vacuum cleaner. He even raked the clippings and tossed them over the bank, which her land butted up against. She set out a cold beer for him and sat down while he finished tucking the mower back into her small garden shed. He walked up to where the beer sat with a little smile on his face. “You bought me some.”
He was so delighted, it reminded her of Charlie whenever she announced an extra recess. There was something endearing about how easily she could please him. Just a small effort from her, and he acted like she did something special for him. “It was the least I could do for you for doing my yard work.”
He shrugged and heaved himself into the chair, raising the beer to his lips with a little grin. “A yard this size? Not really work, more like a sneeze for me.”
“Yeah, when you’re six-foot-forever,” she grumbled.
“Yup. Six-foot-forever and all man,” he said with a leer. She rolled her eyes, but he spotted a grin on her lips. He was always so flirty; and she liked it. It made her feel like someone besides the town’s local elementary school teacher.
“Hey, Allison. I haven’t seen you in forever. How are you?” She froze as she heard the voice behind her. It was Jett and she instantly recognized him without turning around. Her palms started to sweat and she had to press her lips together to hold back the groan of discomfort. No. Just no. Jett could not be talking to her while Shane sat right there. She raised her eyes to his and noticed Shane too appeared frozen in shock. He lowered the beer bottle from his lips and set it down, holding her gaze, his eyes curious. Swallowing her nerves with a large gulp, she turned toward Jett who was wearing grass-stained pants and old shoes, looking as though he, too, was about to mow his yard.
“Uh, hey, Jett. No. You’ve been gone a lot. And no yard work for the winter. You starting on yours too?”
He smiled and nodded, but his gaze went directly to Shane. “Yup,” he replied while his eyes remained on Shane. “Hey, Shane. You two are dating, huh? I’ve heard that around town. Surprised me some, but I’ve noticed your vehicles around here a bit more of late.”
Allison was sure her entire face was beet red. She lowered her eyes to hide her embarrassment. Actually, Jett had not ‘heard that around town.’ Celia told him. Biting the inside of her cheek, she tried to hold in the sarcastic tongue-lashing she really wanted to give Shane. How dare he put her in this situation?
“Uh… we’re friends. Yes. We are friends.” She wasn’t lying, at least. If only because of Erin’s struggles and Allison’s solutions, she could definitely consider them friendly. But being questioned about Shane by his lover’s husband? That was so not okay with Allison. She retained the deep burning shade of crimson and the heat made her loose sweater suddenly feel unbearably tight. It was all Shane’s fault. He was the true source of her extreme discomfort.
Shane merely nodded his endorsement. Jett stood there for a pronounced second, his gaze switching from Shane to Allison before he finally nodded. “Well, hell, why don’t you two come over for dinner tonight? I usually leave to head back to the city for the rest of the week, but tomorrow’s meeting convenes later, so I’m not leaving until the morning.”
Allison had to consciously keep her eyelids from shutting and held her face totally neutral, as she strove to mask the revulsion Jett’s suggestion caused inside of her. No! Ick! Gross! How could she sit through a dinner as Shane’s date while his married lover and her husband sat across from them?
But they were right here already. “Uh… well, we were going to the ranch for dinner,” Shane mumbled when she suddenly appeared to be stricken mute.
Jett nodded. “Oh, I understand. No problem. I just wanted to extend the olive branch. To be honest, when I heard your bike was parked near my place a few weeks back, and Celia said you two were dating… I found it hard to swallow.” Suddenly turning bright red, as if he realized he was insulting them indirectly, Jett paused. Allison was sheer millimeters from kicking Shane’s shin sharply underneath the table. How could he let the man ramble on like that? “But… I see it now. I mean, you must be, right? If he’s mowing your lawn… Anyway, just hope there’s no hard feelings.”
Shane looked a little ill. His face was paler than usual and lines of stress bracketed his mouth.
“Yes, well, glad to know Celia cleared all that up. We were just leaving. Have a safe trip back tomorrow, Jett.” Standing up abruptly, her eyes were wide as she tacitly demanded that Shane do the same.
Jett nodded. “Oh, oh sure. Thanks. And again, sorry for the… you know, the confusion, Allison.”
Allison could hardly stand it. “Oh, no, Jett. You have no reason to be sorry.”
After nearly diving through her sliding glass door,
Allison started pacing her living room. Shane was slower to enter. She noticed his movements were deliberate and measured. He watched her like she was an uncaged tiger, about to pounce, and she really felt like one too.
The silence thickened between them.
“How can you do that?” she finally hissed, stopping dead. “I just don’t know how you can do that to him. Or to me. What kind of decent person could stand there and face the man he’s totally humiliating behind his back? I don’t understand you. I thought I could, well, almost, and I mean I almost liked you these past few weeks. But the whole premise for you being here is all of that stuff with Celia.”
Shane usually responded with exaggerated swagger and bluster. But this time, his head bent down and he just sat staring at his fingers, which he interlaced. Clearing his throat, he barely lifted his head and replied, “I’ve never had something like this happen. I’m sorry. Really, Allison. It never occurred to me he’d actually come over and invite us to his house for dinner.”
“Yeah, and he’s the problem here. Just for being neighborly and inviting us to dinner. Meanwhile, he’s probably starting to feel pretty good since he thinks his wife is not having an affair with you. But, oh yeah; she actually is. Now, that Jett thinks you’re with me, he falsely believes his wife is safe from you. I mean, that’s just cruel. How can you stand there and not feel for that man?”
Shane kind of swiped his foot back and forth before shrugging and scratching his head. “I never… well, hell, I do feel awful, okay? I’ve never been confronted like that before. It’s happened, sure, some husbands or boyfriends found out. But they usually came at me for a fight and I just got angry when they started calling me names. I normally leave town for a while. I never had this happen… where the guy looked so joyful that we were together and I was…”
“Not screwing his wife?”
“Yeah, that.” Shane shrugged and let his shoulders sag down. She felt a tiny crumb inside her that was melting despite her initial glacial response to him. He looked so confused and woebegone.
River's Return (River's End Series, #3) Page 11