My lips quiver with excitement. “Are you serious?”
“Yes!” she says as she rolls her eyes. “Joss, he’s so into you!”
I stand and begin to pace. “But, I was at his house and things got really flirtatious. I tried to kiss him and he pulled away from me like I had two heads.”
“I think he’s old-fashioned,” she says with a smile. “I got the feeling from what he said that he didn’t want you to think he was only interested in your body.”
“Holy fuck!” Reviewing all our conversations, I start to feel like the idiot that I am.
“I had to beg him to come tonight. He said you were mad at him and didn’t want to see him. I told him you were complicated and not to give up on you. He said, and I quote, ‘I knew there was something special about her from the moment I met her.’”
“Gah!” I screech. “What do I do?”
She belly laughs and rolls back on the bed, raising her hands in the air. “Go get him!”
I rush from the bedroom door, not knowing what I’m going to say to him. I owe him an apology at bare minimum. But mostly, I want to kiss him. I’ve never had someone make me so angry yet draw me in at the same time. My mother is still huffing as she places the plates in the dishwasher.
“Where’s Rhode?” I ask.
“Honestly, Joss. I’m slaving away in here. Is it my responsibility to know where everyone is and what they’re doing? You haven’t even thanked me for putting this together.”
“Thanks,” I say as I rush past her.
Once I’m in the living room, I scan the room for him. Annie is sitting on a chair and Grandpa is smiling at her and waving to her from the couch, patting the seat next to him like she should come sit by him. Dad is flipping channels on the TV. Rhode is nowhere to be found.
Annie jumps up when she sees me. “Don’t you leave me alone with this dirty fart again!”
“Where’s Rhode?” I ask.
“He got a call. Said there was some problem with work he had to take care of and left.”
My heart drops.
“What?” she questions, folding her arms.
“I’m an idiot of epic proportions!”
She nods and twists her mouth. “I could have told you that!”
Choosing to ignore her comment, I walk over to the couch and sit down next to my grandfather. “He went to see Jorgie to ask about me. She brought him here to help get us together.”
Annie tilts her head to the side and clicks her teeth. “I like her more now.”
I lean my head on my grandfather’s shoulder and he puts his arms around me.
He pats me on the back. “What’s got you down, cupcake?”
“Did you ever do something dumb and not know how to make it right?”
“Being young is about making mistakes and learning from them. As long as your heart is in the right place, there’s nothing that can’t be fixed. I just told that young man the same thing.”
I kiss him on the cheek and notice Annie watching us. I point to him on the sly and raise my eyebrows at her. She waves me off and leaves the room.
What a night. I have some fixing to do.
I PULL MY HOOD up over my head as I make my way to Annie’s front porch. It’s been pouring for the last two hours and everything is a wet, muddy mess. Even though it’s morning, it almost feels like evening since it’s so dark and dreary outside.
Glancing over at Rhode’s house, I wonder if he’s home. I don’t know what I’m going to say to him when I see him, but I suppose I’ll start with I’m sorry followed by I have the hots for you.
I tap on Annie’s door and walk in as usual. I have a few things I want to say to Annie too. I was too tired to bring up the reviews after I left my parents’ last night, but to say I’m pissed off that she’s been writing and posting reviews without telling me would be an understatement. She’s going to hear just how much.
I walk through the door and Annie’s rear end is up in the air. She’s on the floor, looking under the couch.
“Did you lose something?” I question. “Maybe all those reviews you told me you never wrote?”
She ignores me as she rushes into her bedroom. I follow her. She’s on her hands and knees again, looking under the bed.
“What’s going on?” I ask.
“I can’t find him!”
“Who?”
“Stupid. He’s gone. I can’t find him anywhere.”
I drop my bag on the floor and join her looking under the bed. “When was the last time you saw him?”
“I don’t know. Last night, I think. He was on the chair when I got home.”
“He’s got to be around here somewhere.”
She walks into the kitchen and opens a can of cat food. “Stupid? Come here, you lousy cat!”
I see the panic on her face, so I begin to open doors and look in closets.
She starts to pace and rub her hands on her legs.
“It’s going to be all right. We’ll find him.”
“What if he got out?” she asks.
“Do you think he could have?”
“I don’t know.” She stops to think, pressing the back side of her hand to her forehead. “I opened the front door to get the paper. Now that I think of it, I stumbled as I came back in. I thought nothing of it because I stumble a lot these days. Oh, Lord Jesus. What if he ran out? He can’t see. It’s raining!”
I tug on my bottom lip with my fingers. “I’ll go out and look for him.”
“Oh, damn that cat! He’s going to kill me!” She places her hand on her chest.
“Sit down. Relax. How long ago did you get the paper?”
“About a half-hour ago.”
“Okay, he can’t be far. I’ll go out and look for him. Do you have some treats or something he might like?”
She points to the pantry door and wrings her hands. I’ve never seen her so upset. I say a silent prayer he’s okay as I grab a bag of treats with catnip. “I’ll be back soon.”
“Find my baby!”
I nod my head as I walk out her door. It’s pouring and I have no idea where to look. I start in her backyard.
The rain makes it hard to see. I look behind bushes and under the bench. “Here, kitty kitty!”
“Did you find him?”
I turn to see Rhode in a drenched T-shirt and jeans standing behind me.
“Did she tell you?” I ask.
“Yeah, she called me a few minutes ago. I looked all over this side of the street. I saw your car, so I thought I’d circle back.”
“She’s so upset. I’ve never seen her this way.”
“I know.”
“We have to find him, Rhode!”
“We will. Come on, there’s a park down the street. Let’s look there.”
We search under cars on the street and look up trees as we make our way to the park. I go to the opposite side of the road and he stays on the right. We both call his name as we walk.
Rhode gets on his knees to look under a truck. “Anything?” I shout from the other side, raising my hands in the air.
“No! Let’s keep going.”
After a few minutes we get to the park. It’s just off a main road and traffic flies past us on the street. The idea of him getting hit by a car makes my stomach curl. We need to find him fast.
“He’s probably hiding somewhere. Cats don’t like water,” he says as he pushes his wet hair out of his face.
I nod. “Okay. Where would he hide?” I shout over a boom of thunder.
“You take over there and I’ll check here,” he says, pointing to a path through the trees.
I glance behind bushes and rattle the bag of treats, calling his name. “Stupid! Where are you, Stupid?” I make puckering noises with my mouth. “Here, kitty, kitty!”
The rain is coming down in buckets. My shoes are drenched and I can tell my shirt is getting soaked through the lightweight coat I threw on this morning. But none of that is more important than finding Annie’s cat. She mig
ht say she hates him, but just like everything else, I get the feeling she hates the things she actually loves. Maybe Rhode was right about her from the start.
“Joss!” He shouts my name and I take off running down the path.
“Where are you? I don’t see you.”
“Down here!”
I follow the sound of his voice down a steep hill and see him on his knees by a drain tube. “He’s here!” he says with a smile. “But he won’t come out!”
I slide down the hill, tracking mud up my legs as I move. He reaches out his hand for me and I take it. I crouch down to look in the tunnel. Stupid meows.
“Oh, thank God! We were so worried about you!”
Rhode puts his hand on my back. “See if he’ll come out for a treat.”
I rattle the bag and open it, taking out a piece. In my most baby voice I say, “Ooh . . . look what I have. Mmm . . . want some?”
Rhode chuckles and I realize how dumb I must sound. “What? Do you think he’d respond better to shouting?”
He laughs. “Well, he does live with Annie!” He shrugs as he places his dirty hands on his knees.
“You’re right!”
I turn back to face Stupid. “Get your dumb ass outta there or you’ll never eat again!” I shout, using my best Annie voice.
“That was pretty good. I’m impressed.”
I giggle. “I’ve spent a lot of time with her.”
Our eyes lock on each other and I can feel the heat between us. His smile fades as he stares at my mouth. The water drips down his face and I desperately want to reach out and wipe it away, just to touch him. He breaks our eye contact to refocus on the problem at hand. Gazing down at the ground, I remember I have so much I want to say to him, but I know it’s not the time. I hope he gives me a chance to apologize.
He bends down next to me. “I think I’m going to have to crawl in there and get him.”
“Will you fit?” I ask. It’s kind of narrow.”
“It’s worth a shot.”
I back up and he lies flat on the ground. He wriggles and twists his way in but can’t get past his chest.
“Shit! I’m too big!”
“Let me try!” I say as he pushes himself out.
I take out a treat and hand the bag to him. I lie on the ground and start to slide into the dark hole. “Come here, baby. It’s okay. It’s me, Joss.”
He meows lightly and I can tell he’s scared.
I slide deeper into the tunnel and as I get closer, he backs up.
“No!”
“What?” Rhode asks, lying down beside me, trying to see over my head.
“He’s scared.”
“Sometimes fear makes you run from the thing you need the most.”
Turning my head toward him, I wonder if he’s talking about me now. I refocus on the cat. “Come here, Stupid. It’s okay.”
Holding the treat in my palm, I slowly move it closer to him. I can make out his whiskers from the light from a crack in the tube. He seems to be sniffing the air.
“That’s it. Look what I have for you. Come on! I think he’s coming. That’s it, baby. Come on.”
“Do you have him?” Rhode asks.
“I’m going to grab him when he gets closer. When I say the word, you’re going to have to pull me out. Can you do that?”
“Just tell me when.”
I feel his hands on my thighs and I try not to think about how it feels even though chills race through my body.
Stupid inches toward me. I know I only have one shot at this. He takes the catnip and I grab him by the neck. He meows and struggles. “Now, Rhode! Now!”
He pulls my legs and I slide out with the cat. He quickly grabs him and holds him as I push up. I’m completely covered in mud.
“Great job, babe. You did it.”
He called me babe. My heart pounds in my chest. I’m glad we found the cat, but right now I’m certain my heart is beating for the man in front of me.
There’s another boom of thunder and Stupid struggles in Rhode’s arms.
“Here, give him to me!” I say, motioning with my hands. I unzip my jacket and place him inside of it, holding tightly.
“Let’s get the hell out of here.”
I glance up the hill. “I don’t know if I can,” I tell him, slightly worried. “I have to hold on to Stupid and it’s steep.”
He pushes his damp hair from his eyes with his muddy hands and I can tell he’s thinking. “You go first. You can lean into me. I’ll stand behind you in case you lose your balance.”
I start to climb and I feel his hands on my waist helping me up. We run back to Annie’s in the rain, laughing the whole time.
He rings her doorbell and the dog chimes bark.
Annie quickly opens the door and I hold out Stupid in front of me. He almost looks brown now that he’s got so much dirt on him.
“Where in the hell have you been?” she asks as she takes him from my hands.
She walks inside, closes the door, and I hear it lock.
Rhode and I stare at each other in disbelief.
I cup my hand next to my mouth and yell, “You’re welcome!”
He bends down at his knees to catch his breath and laughs. I shake my head and look down at my hands. There’s mud under my nails, up my arms. It’s everywhere.
“Shit!” I say, glancing back at my car. “Do you have a towel I can borrow to sit on when I drive home?”
He shakes his head. “You can’t go home like that. Come with me.” He takes my hand and pulls me before I have a chance to answer him. I don’t want to leave him anyway. I have a lot I need to say.
We run through the rain back to his house. He feels around his pockets for his keys. I see the panic in his expression.
“Oh, no!” I shout, laughing.
“Fuck! Hold on.”
He finally pulls them from his pants pocket and sighs in relief. We go through his front door and shake the water off. It’s nice to be out of the rain. I’m not sure why, but I start to shiver.
He notices. “You’re cold. Wait here.” He kicks off his shoes and tiptoes through the house. A few seconds later he returns with a pile of towels.
“Let’s take that off,” he says, unzipping my jacket.
He pulls it off my arms and wraps a towel over my shoulders. I take off my wet shoes and place them by the door on the mat. He lifts his T-shirt from the bottom and pulls it over his head, revealing a dirty, wet, chiseled six pack that makes my mouth water.
I’m still shaking, but now I think it’s more from being with him.
“W-o-w,” I say as I stare at him, voice shaking as my teeth chatter.
He stares at me and glances down at himself. “I’m filthy.”
“That’s not what I was wowing over.”
His lips curl as he rubs his hands over my arms. “Let’s get you in the shower.”
Taking me by the hand, he leads me through the house into his bedroom where he carefully pulls a robe from his closet using the tips of his fingers. I follow him into the bathroom and he turns on the water. I’m still shaking.
“You need to get out of those wet clothes.”
“What about you?” I ask.
“I’m okay.”
“You’re more than okay,” I say, meeting his gaze. His head tilts to the side to regard me. My teeth vibrate as I try to say what I need to say. “I’m sorry,” I tell him. “Jorgie explained everything last night. I came out of the bedroom to apologize to you and you were already gone.”
“It was a misunderstanding. No big deal.”
“It’s a big deal to me. I thought you two were dating.”
“Yeah, I figured that out. I just don’t know why you’d think that.”
“Because she’s her and you’re, well . . .” I motion up and down at his body. “And you’re that.”
He gazes down at himself. “I’m what? A dirty mess?”
“Yeah. A hot dirty mess.”
“You think I’m hot?” he s
ays with a wink.
I suddenly feel shy. I know I’m blushing, so I gaze at the floor.
His fingers lift my chin. “Joss, I really am a mess. You just don’t see it. And I like you, a lot. The other day things got kind of crazy . . . and damn, I knew I was flirting. I really, really wanted to be with you. But see, I’ve done that before. I’ve had relationships based on sex and I didn’t want that with you. I didn’t want you to think that’s all it was for me. You’re different.”
“You could have told me that while we had sex.”
He runs his fingers through his hair and looks me over. I assume it’s because everything is stuck to my skin the way it’s stuck to his, leaving very little to the imagination.
“If you only knew. I’ve wanted you since I saw you in that bar.”
“Then take me,” I tell him, stepping toward him.
He closes his eyes and sighs. “Can I take you on a date first?”
“Are you serious?” My teeth stop chattering.
“That day you were at work with Annie, I called you to ask you out. I never had a chance because, well, something happened and things got all weird. Then you were here in my house in those short shorts and so beautiful. I couldn’t think straight.”
“I make it hard for you to think?”
“Yes,” he says, taking a deep breath. “Every time I come close to you, I lose all sense of reason.”
I drop the towel from my shoulders and remove my T-shirt. “How about now?”
“Joss . . .” His words say stop but his eyes want more.
I start to unzip my jeans.
“If you take off those jeans, I’m going to ruin everything.”
I smirk as I tug them down my legs, gazing up at his face. “Why, are you a lousy lay?”
He shakes his head and I watch his lips curl slightly on the side. “I’m going to be the best you’ve ever had. After I take you on a date.”
I drop my pants to the floor and he gazes up at the ceiling.
“Your shower has been running for a while. Pretty soon, you’re going to be out of hot water. Since we both need to get cleaned up I think we should conserve and take one together.”
“You’re making this really hard.”
I bite my lip. “I hope I’m making something hard.”
I undo the clasp of my bra and slowly pull it down my shoulders, not revealing my breasts. He can’t help but watch me, even though he tries to act like he’s not.
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