by K. F. Breene
The dude with the medicine machine came to give her the epidural and Ben went running. Half way through trying to get it set up, another contraction came on. Krista whimpered and everything stopped. The nurse braced her, Sean put his hand on her knee, and another crash of torture smothered her.
The nurse said, “Pretty soon you’ll be flying, Krista. No sweat.”
Once the tube was in place, Krista had another contraction that stopped conversation, and she was strategically placed on her side so the drug would take effect and not mess up the tube that was to remain inside her lower back. Things got better. She felt the pain subside fairly quickly and could breath, pain free, again.
That was when Marcus entered the building.
“What’d I miss? Hey honey!” He was carrying a giant bouquet of roses. “You look awful!”
“She looks beautiful,” Sean said from his lounge chair next to Krista’s bed.
Marcus laughed and said, “Protective to the last, huh, young stud? Well, who wants to hear the latest gossip?”
This is how they spent the next two hours until the doctor came in to check her, noted her at five centimeters, and chased everyone away. Krista needed to rest, she said. There was a long way to go yet. She should turn off the lights and try to sleep. Everyone could come back when the show began.
Right before everyone left, life was serene. Sean was doting on her, her friends were treating her with goddess status, and she had a portly, jubilant nurse in and out asking if she needed anything. Oh yeah, and she couldn’t feel her legs.
Chapter Thirty-Six
As she and Sean tried to close their eyes, she on her side in her hospital bed, him on his lounge chair that looked super uncomfortable, Krista started noticing that her legs weren’t as numb as before. Feeling slowly started to creep back in.. This meant, of course, she was starting to feel the contractions raise their ugly head and give her a jagged toothed smile.
Right now, that head was dull and blunt. It was banging around below her stomach somewhere. But she got worried immediately. She looked around for the nurse call remote and Sean jumped up as if on springs.
“What’s up? What do you need? I love you very much, baby. So, so much.”
“Um…just need the nurse call button pushed. I think the epidural is wearing off.”
Krista took a moment to think that it must be nice to be really excited and awaiting the birth without actually having to deal with the tubes in your back and arms, the pain, the huge belly—she was crabby. She did need to get some sleep.
Sean pushed the button, his eyes looking at Krista with tender devotion. The nurse came in and looked askew when Krista told her what was happening. Apparently it wasn’t an everyday occurrence.
Krista was switched to her other side, which was weird because she had just come back from that side—apparently the medicine just flowed out of the tube wherever gravity takes it. It was necessary, then, to awkwardly move from one side to the other— awkwardly because numb legs are dead weight and moving them is then not the easiest thing in the world.
They settled down again, Sean content that the problem was fixed. But it wasn’t. The numbness receded, leaving surges of dull, creeping pain in its wake. Finally, Krista started reaching for the remote again. She could see the direction this operation was headed.
“What’s up, Krista?” Sean said as he bounded up again.
“Sean, you’re supposed to be resting.”
“I’m not the one who needs it, Krista. What do you need? Do you want some ice chips? Are you hungry? You can have some chicken broth, I think.”
“I need the nurse again. This stuff is wearing off and it’s starting to hurt.”
Sean pushed the button and walked to the door to look outside. He came back into the room, followed by the nurse. This time, her confusion was evident. She went to look at the machine, looked at the tubes to make sure all was in place, then put her hands on her hips and tilted her head.
“I’ll call the anesthesiologist. He’ll have you fixed right up!” she said in her low, though comforting, voice.
Krista loved nurses. When people were at their worst, they always seemed at their best. Krista was careful not to let her eyes get misty. Sean would flip if he saw her crying.
Time grinded on. Apparently the medicine man was in a C-section delivery and couldn’t come help until he was done. While he was away, the beast of pain was raging against the bonds of numbness. Numbness was slowly losing. It was only a matter of time.
The nurse came to check on Krista a few more times with updates about her tambourine man, the only one who could make the onslaught of pain go away, and with each time she entered, Krista was in worse and worse shape. Sean went from sidekick to star of the show as she needed more and more encouragement to stay calm.
Relax. Moan it out. Here we go. Moan it out. You’re doing great. Almost there now. Almost. Good work, Krista. I love you. You are doing so well.
When Sean called all the girls to come back to the hospital, Krista was at nine centimeters and completely without the help of the epidural. Bitch of it was, she still had all the tubing and crap in her back. She still had to stay still, stay on her side, but she got no benefits from it. Someone upstairs was laughing their ass off at that one!
Krista was laying against the bed banisters, clutching the metal bars with all her strength, moaning like a banshee with tears in her eyes, when Kate and Jasmine walked in. The pain was unimaginable. Krista didn’t realize anything could hurt so much. Her brain registered it as suffering. Torture, maybe. That much pain should only signify eminent death.
Krista could see the panic in Sean’s eyes as he struggled for calm. He wasn’t taking this much better than she was. He didn’t realize he would have to see her like this and he’d only felt that helpless one other time in his life. It didn’t help the situation. It was hard to see someone you loved in intense pain. And Krista was suffering. She was not trying to hide it. She wanted any kind of drug offered. She’d never smoked weed in her life, but if someone offered, she definitely would have thought about it!
Another contraction ripped through her body. A dull, bone crunching pain, consuming her lower half. The class she took wasn’t the Lamaze of her parents’ generation, but a new way of coping. You breathed, then moaned. It was a guttural, deep howl that came from the center of your being. You were supposed to put all your misery and feeling into that primal groan. It was the sound you made when you ate bad fish and your stomach was half an hour away from purging. It was the sound you made sitting on the toilet waiting to die, or just too drunk to function. It was the international sound of misery.
“What the hell happened?” Kate said as the contraction subsided.
They were coming about every minute and a half now. It was getting close.
Krista just wanted it to be over.
“Drugs wore off,” she panted.
“We are going to get through this Krista,” Sean said with more determination than he felt. “We took a class for this. You can do it. Can I get you anything?”
“Pain meds.”
The nurse bustled in and shooed Kate and Jasmine to the side. Marcus and Ben sauntered in after, followed by Cassie. Ben took one look at Krista and stopped, his eyes round like orbs.
“What happened?” Ben breathed.
“Krista, you look…are you okay?” Marcus asked, all traces of relaxation or humor completely absent.
“Having a baby.”
“It looks like it hurts,” Cassie whined. She realized she was next in line for the torture chamber.
Another contraction.
Pain blotted out Krista’s awareness. Sean was in her face again, hand on her cheek, voice soothing as he went through the breathing and moaning she was supposed to be doing. She followed him, in too much pain to be embarrassed, eyes locked on his. Her moan infused the thousand dull knives stabbing her lower back and abdomen.
When it was over, the nurse checked her—which meant stickin
g her fingers into a private place—and said they would start to get ready.
Krista had been worried about the boys seeing her hoo-haw. That was before. Now, as little people dressed like clowns banged on her abdomen with mallets, Krista didn’t care if she was butt-ass naked, legs spread wide, and one of the boys had a camera. She just wanted the show to end. She didn’t care about the details.
Or the strange thoughts bordering on hallucinations…
“Who would you like to witness the birth?” The nurse asked in a no-nonsense voice. She was ready to kick some people out.
“Ben’s freaking out—not him,” Krista said weakly with closed eyes.
When Krista opened her eyes Ben was still staring at her in horror. Marcus was trying to drag him out of the room.
“Is she okay?” Ben asked in a small voice. “Is something going wrong?”
“No, dear.” The nurse started to help Marcus usher him out. “She’s about to have a baby. Everything is looking good.”
Ben was shaking his head as he was moved backward. “Check her again. Something is wrong. That can’t be normal.”
“Man, I’m glad I got the gay card. No kids for me unless they are born in a test tube!” Marcus said as the door was closed.
The next three hours saw Krista with one leg on Sean, one on Kate, the nurse giving pushing instructions, and Jasmine and Cassie either holding her head or standing by. Another nurse came and went to help or give a pep talk on how well she was doing. Pushing made the pain less, so she did so with all her might. Everything she had went into it.
Three grisly hours later, and it was nearing the end.
“Annnnnndddd here’s the head!” the nurse said after one of the many strong pushes. Krista was so tired, she could barely keep her eyes open between each contraction.
“Almost there, baby. I am so proud of you!” Sean said softly, his eyes dripping with love.
“Bet you’re glad for this to be over,” Kate said, looking at Krista’s crotch.
“Bet you’ll never forget you spent three hours staring at your friend’s woo-haw,” Krista laughed tiredly.
“Doesn’t count,” Kate said as she waved a hand dismissively. “This shit is too extreme. Although, I can’t imagine Sean is all that excited watching the ruin of your fun factory.”
Sean said, “She is giving life. She created and is now delivering part of me. How could I not view this as the most holy of moments?”
All the women fell silent at his words. The nurse looked up at him with glistening eyes. “That is the most beautiful thing I have ever heard a father say.” She looked at him with adoration.
The moment was interrupted by the return of searing pain.
“Okay, now…push!”
Krista did. She pushed. She pushed and pushed. She strained with it. She shook her head to stay awake between times, and then pushed again.
Finally, after years and years, the nurse and her helper got exceedingly energized. “Okay, here we go!!”
A large object squeezed out of Krista’s body with a hot, stinging sensation. Suddenly, she was emptied. “It’s a girl!”
Krista had a second of gratitude before she heard the most angelic sound in her life. Her new baby girl cried for the first time. Tears came to her eyes and she looked up at Sean. He was looking down at her. For the first time in memory, he was freely crying. Unabashed tears dripped from his eyes. He smiled, looking more handsome than Krista had ever seen him.
In fact, a quick look told her everyone was crying. Even Kate, the hard ass, had tears in her eyes. It was crazy to think that a being came out of her. It was extraordinary.
The screaming baby was taken to the corner of the room to be weighed, measured, washed, etc. Sean stood halfway between his two girls, unsure which way to go. He looked at Krista like a puppy who was asking permission to go outside.
“Make sure she’s alright.”
He nodded, a huge smile crossing his face. The nurse was explaining something about tears and stitches and afterbirth. Krista didn’t care. Recovery she could handle. She was glad everything worked out successfully.
Epilogue
Sean took to parenting much better then Krista. They were in the hospital for two glorious days. Nurses helped them at every turn, including how to handle a crying baby and how to breastfeed. It was totally awkward having Sean sit in for the breastfeeding mini-lessons, but he was eager to be in every part of his daughter’s new life. He wanted to be the parent he never had.
Speaking of his parents, they didn’t give a crap about his marriage. They didn’t care about his upbringing. They didn’t care about being parents themselves. But they were all over their grandchild.
His mother and father sat in Krista and Sean’s living room, civilly waiting patiently for the other to be done holding and playing with their new granddaughter. It was apparently the first time they were in the same room without fighting in over two decades. Each had brought a mountain of gifts. His father already paid her way through college via a newly opened bank account in her name.
Krista had no idea they had that kind of money. No idea.
Then there was Krista’s mom and dad. Over the moon. Absolutely beside themselves with glee. They were currently in talks of moving to L.A. to be closer to Krista and Sean. To their family.
Samantha was furious.
Sean was ecstatic.
Krista took to parenting like a fat kid takes to vegetables. She hated being cooped up inside. She hated losing her independence. Her hormones raged—one minute being overly depressed, and the next, high on life. She didn’t know how to quiet the baby—named Sophie— and she didn’t know how to hold her. Basically, she didn’t know what the hell she was doing. Despite the clichés she had heard, mostly from men when she thought back on it, mothering wasn’t something that came naturally. You had to learn it. Some women did have a maternal instinct, sure, but just as many didn’t. Krista was one of the latter.
She asked and received advice from any mother she could. She talked to strangers on the street. She formed a bond with the most unlikely of people. She was now a part of a worldwide organization larger and more comforting than any other—the mothers’ circle. Having a baby granted her admittance to this social club she didn’t even know existed. They formed a pact together that was more solid than any sports team she had ever played on. You wouldn’t fall far without someone trying to catch you. When that wasn’t Sean, it was surely another mother, regardless of how well Krista knew her.
While Krista struggled with parenting, Sean slid into it gracefully. If anyone had that maternal instinct, it was him. He took two weeks off from work to be home with her and the baby. He did the hours she did. They were both exhausted, but Sean held them together. He cooked while Krista fed her. He cleaned while Krista fed her. He calmed Krista down when she cried about being a slave to feeding her—Sophie having commandeered Krista’s boobs. He held the baby when she was fussy, or when Mommy was fussy and hormone riddled, and gave Krista time off when she needed to nap. He was a godsend.
Krista cried when he had to go back to work. But she got the hang of it. She wouldn’t lie and say she ever became a better parent then he. She never did. But they had always made a solid team, and parenting was no different. Their relationship flexed and changed. Krista still loved Sean like crazy, but it paled in comparison to how much she loved her little girl. They had to struggle to keep their relationship whole and sound in the shadow of the devotion to their new baby.
But they did it. Neither of them would ever say die. They would never give in to failure. They had some tough times. Times when Krista didn’t want to see his face. Times when Sean thought Krista wasn’t trying as hard as she should. But they talked it out. Or hugged it out. They worked through it. Their love for each other came back in full force and grew to exponentially to include their love for their daughter, their family, and their friends. And, together, they thrived.
The End
***
; More by K.F. Breene:
Into the Darkness (Darkness Series)
Sasha has grown up with one surety: She’s not normal.
She sees things in the darkness that no one else can see. Mysterious men cloaked in shadow, moving through the night. The problem is, pointing out invisible people is a fast track to a padded cell. Orphaned at age five, Sasha quickly learns an important survival tip: keep her mouth shut and stay out of the spotlight.
Until one night, everything changes. She and her boyfriend, Jared, find themselves stranded on the wrong side of town. Suddenly, the men she was convinced were hallucinations, are very real. And very dangerous.
As a new world opens up around her, she meets him. The Boss. An alpha leader who entrances her mind and tugs on her body. Primal and sexual, his people have a different set of rules. And they don’t always play nice.
As danger rises up around her, her differences may be the only thing that saves her life. She must embrace what she’s tried so hard to hide, while resisting the person her body craves most. Sasha has finally found her shadow men, and they will change her life forever.
***
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