My heart plunges into my stomach. I blink hard, rereading the message to be sure it’s real. “No. This can’t happen.”
The past three months flash before my eyes. Eli spanking me in the elevator, demanding I agree to marry him. Him clasping the sword around my neck. All the chats over coffee in his office, our little inside jokes, the dirty, sweet sex we have together.
Pearl’s voice in my ear, you have to play your hand in your fate.
I make my decision. “I can’t let this happen.”
Fingers fly over the screen before I can lose my nerve. I’ve seen Eli enter his password on this phone countless times. I happen to know it’s the date of his mother’s birthday. The screen unlocks and one tiny moment of doubt creeps into my thoughts. I hit delete.
No longer able to look at the phone, I place it on the nightstand, face down.
Eli murmurs, “What are you doing?”
Shit.
He can’t know what I’ve done. He’ll hate me. Taming my voice, I try to sound casual. “I thought you had a message, but I must have been hearing things.”
He rolls over, unconcerned about his phone. “It’s past a certain little girl’s bedtime. Get yourself over here.”
Rushing around the bed, I climb back under the covers.
“Come here,” he growls. Wrapping his arm around my waist, he tugs me into him, his chest pressed against my back. “There’s a good girl.”
Despite my heavy guilt, a contented smile crosses my face. Who could blame me for wanting to preserve this strange, wonderful union I’ve found myself blessed by? What wife wouldn’t do the same to protect her marriage?
When I wake in the morning, the first thing I see is Eli, sitting on his side of the bed, texting on his phone.
My guilt resurfaces.
We have breakfast together right where we made love the previous evening, a smirking smile on my face. When I’ve over at the coffeepot, refiling Eli’s cup, I notice he’s texting on his phone again, this time he’s holding it under the counter, as if hiding the screen.
Paranoia’s not a good look for me. I shake my head at my silly thoughts, pouring the coffee carefully. “What time will you be home?”
Flustered, he tosses the phone in his suit jacket pocket. “I meant to tell you—I’ve got a mission tonight, I’ll be home late. Will you be alright on your own for dinner?”
Brushing my silly insecurities aside, I assure him, “I’ll be fine.”
Smiling, he kisses me. I hear the ding of his phone and he’s suddenly distracted, wandering toward the door while tapping away at the screen.
It’s nothing, I tell myself.
Canceling my plans with Emily, I slump down onto the couch in a depression. Not only am I suffering from paranoia about his texts over breakfast, in the bright morning sun, the act I justified late last night now feels like a breach of Eli’s trust. I’ve got to tell him.
But what if he leaves me? The thought weighs heavy on me, making my stomach turn. I take a bright pink Gerbera daisy from the arrangement in the vase on the coffee table. Picking the petals one by one, I repeat a childhood game. One I’ve played many times over the very same man I name now. “Eli loves me, he loves me not.”
Halfway around the flower, I lose heart, releasing it from my hand. It drops onto the table. Sighing, I lay my head back on the couch cushion. “It’s no use. I have to tell him.”
I think of Pearl. The dishonesty in her plan to get Henry. What if she hadn’t done such a thing, just sat back and let her friend go out with him? He might have married her—a woman who didn’t love him... not like Pearl did, at least—and missed out on his one true love, the love of his life.
Am I Pearl in the scenario? And I am prepared to deal with the repercussions of my actions? Adding further to the list of things I now owe Eli.
What if... what if I were to make a promise to myself, a solemn vow—I will let myself off the hook for this one little late-night deleted text message? Only under one condition: I will never, ever touch my husband’s phone again.
The weight lifts from my shoulders. Knowing I’ll keep my word, a pinky promise to myself, I can handle what I’ve done, the decision I made, as long as it was a one-time thing. Happiness fills me, making me ready to begin my day. I rush to the kitchen to call Emily, hoping she hasn’t already made other plans.
Emily and I spend the day shopping in little boutiques for adorable baby clothes. Now in her second trimester, her energy is back, and she agrees to have dinner with me, to keep me company while Eli is on his mission.
We sit down at a little pizzeria, ordering the ham and pineapple that my pregnant friend is craving. Over huge slices of the cheesy goodness, she asks me, “Where did you say Eli is tonight?”
Dabbing my mouth with a napkin, I say, “Oh, he just said he had a mission—you know us mafia wives, we know better than to ask.”
Her brow furrows.
I suddenly feel panicked, my heart racing. “What is it?”
She shrugs, shaking her head. “It’s nothing.”
I demand, “No, it’s not. I can read it on your face. What is it?”
She gives me a sheepish look. “Maybe I’m mistaken, but I’m pretty sure when Eli moved up the ranks, Luca mentioned that Rockland had taken Eli off missions, that he put him on daytime security duty.”
Eli always leaves by eight in the morning, returns home by six. And he was on daytime security detail the day I tried to breach the wall. “Well then, where is he?”
She looks worried. “I don’t know. Could something have come up with his parents?”
“He would have told me.” Whatever he’s doing tonight, whatever mission he’s on, he must not want me to know about it.
Emily places her hand over mine. “Try not to worry. I’m sure it’s nothing.”
But it sure doesn’t feel like nothing. I think back to Eli’s secretive texting this morning, how he held his phone under the counter, how he rushed out the door, completely distracted.
My appetite disappears. “Do you mind if we take this to go?”
“Of course not. Why don’t you come back to mine and wait for him to get home?” But as she says it, she releases a huge yawn.
I need to get her home. “No, you need your rest. Let’s drop you off, then I’ll go home, and he’ll probably already be back. I’ll be fine, I promise.”
We go out to the driver, the pizza split into two boxes between us.
Dropping Emily off first, I watch as Luca comes out to greet her, taking her into his arms and kissing her. I imagine him whispering the words to her that I so long to hear: I love you.
Tears spring in my eyes as the car pulls from the curb to take me home. Despite my better judgement, I pull my phone from my purse, typing out a text to Eli.
Where are you?
The rest of the ride, I can’t tear my eyes from the phone screen. He doesn’t reply.
There is no doubt in my mind. I may have erased one single text message, but I could never erase the love that was between them. I know for certain that his hidden texts this morning were messages to her.
That Cascade Jackson is, in fact, his mission.
I put myself to bed, imagining him and Cascade, holding hands over a candlelit dinner. Her face, so beautiful, enchanting in the soft glow, her life so exciting, keeping Eli enthralled with stories about her day. Laughing, joking together as they were at the deli back home.
Now, tonight as I lie broken and alone in our marital bed, they are planning their future together.
The pain is agony, torture like nothing I’ve ever felt. My heart feels as if it’s been torn into pieces. The tears come and turn to sobs, racking my entire body. “I was such a fool to think he could ever grow to love me.”
I cry myself to sleep, fearing this is my last night as Mrs. Eli Bachman.
Chapter Ten
Eli
I’ve been texting Victoria all morning. Luckily, I was able to get her off the hook for her part in Ch
arlotte’s break-in attempt. Rockland may decide to fire her one day, but at least her life isn’t in jeopardy.
She owes me a favor, and I’m cashing it in.
After work, I have my driver take me to Bachman’s Jewelers. The red awning greets me, promising me happiness in my future. Opening the door, there’s a tinkling sound of a bell, but Victoria needs no warning. She’s waiting for me.
I smile. “Hello, Victoria. Do you have something for me?”
Victoria looks nervous, upset even. She hurries from around the counter to greet me. “Hello, Mr. Bachman. Before I show you what you’ve requested, you should know you have a... guest.” Victoria locks the front door and flips the Open sign to Closed.
Panic grips me—has my wife figured out my secret? On the way here, I received a text from her, asking where I was, but so afraid she’s catch me in my lie, I didn’t text her back. “Is Charlotte here?”
Victoria shakes her head. “It’s not Charlotte. It’s another woman. She called the store this morning, said she had no way of getting in touch with you, she was calling the Bachman businesses trying to track you down. I didn’t want to get into trouble, but she was persistent, said she had something urgent to tell you. I know I shouldn’t have, but I mentioned you’d be here, in the store, this evening.”
Who could it be? Is this a trap, some kind of undercover attack from a rival preying upon trusting Victoria to get to me? My hand goes to my waist, touching the gun I have concealed. “What’s her name?”
“Eli?” I look in the direction of the voice that calls my name.
Cascade Jackson steps out from the back of the store. She looks lovely as ever, her painted lips rising in a smile that meets her high cheekbones.
Seeing her dredges up old feelings of warmth, disappointment. “Cascade? What are you doing here?”
She rushes over to me. “I had to talk to you. Did you get my text last night?”
Cascade only has the number to my civilian phone. The recent messages on there are between me and Victoria, nothing from Cascade. Strange. “I’m afraid that I didn’t.”
A bright smile of hope glows upon her face. “I... I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about it and I wanted to tell you that, if you’re game, then so am I.”
I ask, “Game for what, Cascade?”
She moves closer, standing before me. The familiar scent of her perfume reaches me. “To meet your parents. I realized I was too short-sighted in my views. That I should have given your... lifestyle more of a chance. The truth is... I miss you, Eli.”
Victoria’s eyes go wide as saucers. “If you’ll excuse me.”
“Of course,” I murmur to Victoria, my gaze locked on Cascade’s.
She’s tracked me down to tell me she misses me, that she wants another chance. That she’s open to my lifestyle. I think of how three months ago, I wanted nothing more than for her to meet my parents.
That is... until Charlotte.
I take no joy in hurting Cascade, but I’m grateful for this moment as it solidifies my happiness in everything I’m building with my wife. Looking down at the ring on my finger, a sheepish smile creeps to the corners of my mouth. Holding my left hand up in the air, I say, “I think I should tell you—I’m married.”
Her jaw drops, tears pop up into her eyes. She clears her throat, stammering, “M-married? I had no idea. So fast? You and I were only together just a few months ago...”
“It’s an old family friend. Someone I’ve known for a long time. Cascade, I’m sorry.” I reach out to embrace her, to apologize for causing her tears.
Suddenly ready to make her exit, she brushes past me, pasting a brave smile on her face. “Well then, I guess there is no more to say. No matter. I’ve said what I came here to say. I do wish you and your wife a very happy life.”
The woman has class. I’ve always admired her for it. “Thank you. That means a lot coming from you.”
She gives me a hard nod, hurrying toward the door. Victoria steps out from the shadows, rushing over to unlock the door for her. Giving me one sad smile over her shoulder, Cascade disappears into the night, her car waiting at the curb to whisk her away.
Victoria looks to me, unsure of how to proceed.
I give her a reassuring smile. “Would you mind if we kept this between us? I’m afraid it would hurt Charlotte to know that Cascade was here. And I like to keep my wife happy.”
She breathes a sign of relief, as if she didn’t know which way this evening would turn. “Of course, Mr. Bachman. Now let’s take a look at those jewels you ordered.”
I stroll over the case she’s prepared, making light talk to ease her nerves. “What a shitty husband I am. Charlotte goes through all the trouble of surprising me with that amazing meal and I couldn’t even remember to pick her up a token for our three-month anniversary. Shameless.”
Victoria shakes her head. “I’m sure she wasn’t expecting anything. Charlotte’s not like that.”
Glittering diamonds nestle in black velvet trays. I run my fingers over the pieces she’s chosen. “Even so, hopefully I’ll make it up to her with this gift.”
Charlotte has her wedding band, my sword necklace, the earrings I sent her the day of our wedding. But my darling wife never received an engagement ring.
Tonight, I will correct that.
All the rings are her size, all set in gold to match her wedding band, Victoria has made sure of that. I pick up the one that looks most like what I think Charlotte would choose. twirling it beneath the lights, watching the rainbows dance from the jewels. “What do you think of this one?”
“Pavé set diamonds on the halo and along each side of the shank, highlighting the pear-cut center diamond, three carats in weight. Excellent choice.”
I laugh, heady with the knowledge of the joy this ring will bring Charlotte. “I have no idea what you’ve just said but I’ll take it.”
Victoria takes the ring from me and carefully settles it into a red leather box. “I think Charlotte will be very surprised. And delighted. She’s a very lucky woman.”
“It’s me who’s had all the luck,” I assure her.
When I arrive home, Charlotte is already asleep. Disappointment fills me; I don’t know that I can wait to show her the ring. But her face looks exhausted, and finding I don’t have the heart to wake her, I let her sleep.
Lying down beside her, I open the box, taking the ring out. Holding it between my fingers, I twirl it, watching the sparkles dance.
There’s a ding from a message on my phone. Setting the ring back in and closing the box, I hide it in the drawer of my nightstand. I grab my phone before it can make any more noise, fearing waking my sleeping wife.
The text flashes across the screen. It’s from Cascade.
Are you sure I can’t persuade you to rethink your current situation?
Cascade always was a persistent woman. Grinning, I type back my reply.
The phone is snatched from my hands. Charlotte is awake, wild-eyed, hair sticking up everywhere like a feral animal. She jumps from the bed, waving the phone in her hand. “Ah ha! I knew you had a dirty little secret. Let me see.”
“Charlotte, what are you talking about?” I watch in surprise as she starts punching in my password.
“Oh, you know exactly what I’m talking about, mister.” She unlocks the phone, staring at the screen.
“How do you know my password?” I stand and go to take the phone back from her but she’s too quick.
Dodging into the bathroom, she calls, “It’s your mother’s birthday.” Slamming the door, she locks it behind her.
This is exactly why I didn’t want to tell Charlotte I’d run into Cascade today. Due to the forced nature of our marriage, we already walk a delicate line, Charlotte forever feeling insecure about my devotion to her.
I cross the room. Resting my head against the bathroom door. I run my hands through my hair. I call through the bathroom. “What did Cascade’s text say?”
Charlotte cries, “I’m
just reading it now... and it’s... it’s... terrible. How could she try to break us up like that?”
I put on my stern tone. My daddy voice, as Charlotte calls it. “Now come out of that bathroom and read my reply. Out loud.”
There’s only silence from behind the bathroom door.
“Charlotte,” I demand.
She knows my warning tone and the door creaks open, her tearstained face peeping out. A look of shame is in her eyes.
“Come here.” I take her hand and lead her to the bed. Sheepishly she sits beside me, holding the phone. “Now read them out loud, young lady.”
Sniffling, she says, “She said, ‘Are you sure I can’t persuade you to rethink your current situation?’”
I look down at her. She seems so small and lost, I want to hug her. But first, we need to face her mistrust. “And what did I write back?”
She looks down at the phone, shamefully reading my words. “You said, ‘Not a chance.’”
I give her a stern look. “Whatever made you think that I would leave you? Do you really know me that little, to think I would go back on my vow to you?”
She tosses the phone onto the bed, covering her face with her hands. “Oh, Eli! I did something terrible.”
What could she have done? “What did you do, Charlotte?”
She waves her hands in the air, fretting as she speaks. “Late last night, Cascade texted you, telling you she wanted to meet your parents. Afraid I’d lose you, I deleted the message. You were glued to your phone all morning, then you were gone on a mission, tonight, but Emily said that Luca said that you aren’t on missions anymore. You didn’t reply to my text. I assumed you were with her and cried myself to sleep and the next thing I know, the light of your phone woke me up and you were midnight texting. I was sure it was you telling Cascade how much you miss her.”
“That’s a lot of assumptions you made, young lady.”
“I know. I just...” Her words trail off. She fingers the hem of her nightgown nervously.
Daddy Page 11