Hot Fudge (A Loretta Kovacs thriller)

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Hot Fudge (A Loretta Kovacs thriller) Page 17

by Anthony Bruno


  “Drive where?” Sunny said, looking as bored as could be.

  “Where I tell you.”

  “Oh, really?”

  “Yes, really.”

  Dorie stuck her face between the bucket seats. “Where do you want to go, Arnie?” she asked, trying to mediate before he and Sunny really got into it.

  He hesitated for a moment, thinking it might be bad karma to answer to his old name. He should be rejecting the old stuff. He had to look forward. “I’ve got someplace in mind,” he said, grinning with his eyebrows.

  “Someplace fun?” she asked.

  “I think so.”

  “Where’s that?” Sunny said, not at all amused. He grinned at both of them in turn. “Let me surprise you. You’ll have a ball. Trust me.”

  “I never trust anyone,” Sunny declared. “You can trust Arnie,” Dorie said.

  Krupnick just sat there grinning and shining like ole Mr. Sun. Yeah, you can trust Arnie, he thought. You just can’t trust Ira.

  22

  “I don’t think anybody’s here,” Vissa said. “I think this building’s been condemned.” She was at the top of a rickety, dimly lit staircase in a dilapidated tenement in a neighborhood that looked more like Newark than San Francisco. The plaster walls were so water-damaged, there was more lathing showing than plaster.

  “Knock on the door anyway,” Loretta said from the bottom of the staircase. “Barry said Agnes lives here and works here, too.” Loretta was holding Dragon by the rope that was serving as his leash. The dog was still a little groggy, but he was coming around. He’d taken a liking to Loretta and would lean against her leg whenever she would let him. At the moment he was on his haunches, sitting on her foot.

  “Do you mind?” she said, pulling her foot out.

  “What?” Vissa said.

  “Nothing. I was talking to the dog.”

  “Why don’t you bring him up here? I’ve got a bad feeling about this place.”

  Loretta looked down at Dragon’s wrinkly face. “She expects you to protect us? I don’t think so.”

  He wagged his tail a few times, then heaved a deep sigh as if he were about to fall asleep again.

  She tugged on the rope and got him to his feet. “No offense, Dragon, but I wish I had my gun with me. Too many weirdos out here. Even if you were clean and sober, I don’t think you’d be much help.”

  “Will you stop talking to that dog and get up here?” Vissa said, getting testy. She had her fists propped on her hips, doing her Jersey-girl routine.

  “Chill out, will ya?” Loretta said, as she made her way up the steps. It was slow going with Dragon because he kept trying to sit down. She could feel Vissa’s impatience raining down on her, but she didn’t say anything. Loretta still couldn’t make up her mind about Vissa. They’d been through a lot in the last few hours, but Loretta wasn’t about to call her “girlfriend” yet. Even though it had all happened years ago—seducing Marvelli, falling in love with Krupnick, and then helping the bum escape—they weren’t the kind of things Loretta could just overlook. Vissa seemed okay, but she also seemed to have her own agenda, and little things like morality, scruples, and right and wrong didn’t get in her way.

  Loretta made it to the top of the stairs, but Dragon was still four steps behind. “Go ahead, knock,” she said to Vissa. “He’ll make it.”

  Reluctantly Vissa knocked on the door, which was very loose on its hinges. From the sound of it, Loretta figured she could easily crash through it with a good hip check. All of a sudden her heart started to thump in anticipation. Maybe Marvelli was in there, she thought. Maybe he was okay. Maybe Krupnick just left him here.

  But then the blood drained out of Loretta’s face as she considered the possibility that maybe Krupnick had left Marvelli’s body here.

  “Look out,” Loretta said, shoving her way past Vissa in a panic. She had to get in there. She had to find Marvelli.

  But just as she was about to crash through the door, it squeaked open.

  “What do you want?” A woman was standing in the doorway. She had some kind of Scandinavian accent, Loretta guessed. She seemed to be in her mid to late twenties and was very thin and bony. Her elbows, knees, and cheekbones were like knobs under her skin. She was wearing brown corduroy shorts, a gauzy white top with crisscross lacing in front, and no shoes. Her hair was thin and almost colorless, hanging dead-straight to her shoulders. Her complexion was translucent, and Loretta doubted that makeup had ever touched it. She was an anti-California girl.

  “What do you want?” the woman repeated in the same monotone.

  “Are you Agnes?” Loretta asked.

  The woman looked at Loretta blankly. “Do you want a rub?”

  Loretta exchanged glances with Vissa. “Excuse me?”

  “A rub, a rubdown. That’s what I do. Massage.”

  Loretta checked out her skinny arms. This girl didn’t look like she had the strength to squeeze a marshmallow.

  The woman’s tiny gray eyes narrowed suspiciously. “Who sent you here?”

  “Barry Utley,” Vissa said. “Are you Agnes?”

  But now the woman noticed Dragon, who had finally dragged himself up to the top step. “Dragon!” she said, squatting down to get on the dog’s level. “What’s wrong, Dragon? Your energy is so depleted.” Her gaze followed the leash back to Loretta. “His aura is purple black,” she said accusingly.

  Loretta looked down at the dog. “He looks black and brown to me.”

  “What are you doing with him? Where’s Sunny?” The woman stood up suddenly and switched gears from sleepwalker to guided missile.

  “We’re baby-sitting him,” Vissa said. “And actually we’re looking for Sunny ourselves. So are you Agnes or not?”

  “Yes, I’m Agnes. But I want to know how you got Dragon. Sunny doesn’t leave him with just anyone.” She stooped down again and stroked Dragon’s head, but the dog was too out of it to respond.

  “We’re watching him for Sunny,” Vissa said. “Do you know where she is?”

  Agnes glared at her. “Are you sleeping with my Sunny? Are you both sleeping with her?”

  Loretta almost laughed out loud. “Are you crazy? I’ve been struggling since college to stay heterosexual. I just couldn’t find a guy who wanted to be hetero with me.”

  “I know how my Sunny is. She likes to experiment with people. Have you experimented with her?” Agnes’s outrage had dissipated. She sounded prim and matter-of-fact now.

  “You have my solemn vow,” Loretta said. “I have not experimented with her.”

  “Me neither,” Vissa said. “So do you know where Sunny is?”

  Agnes ignored the question. “Dragon looks thirsty. Have you given him water?”

  “No,” Loretta said quickly before Vissa could answer. In fact they had give Dragon plenty of water. “Do you think you could give him some?”

  “Of course,” Agnes said. “Stay right here. I have a client.”

  Agnes went off to get some water, and as soon as she was out of sight, Loretta went right in.

  “What’re you doing?” Vissa whispered.

  “Ssshhh.” Loretta gave her the leash. She was determined to find Marvelli.

  Agnes’s apartment was a very raw loft space with spots of exquisite renovation. One section of the battered, wide-plank, solid wood floor had been sanded and painted with a floor mural depicting a starry night sky. The mortar on the bare brick walls was disintegrating, leaving little piles of concrete dust all along the baseboards, but part of that wall was decorated with a series of four medieval tapestries depicting the hunt, capture, and escape of a white unicorn. All the furniture looked like it came from a thrift shop except for a Danish modern, brown leather reading chair and a brass floor lamp that arched over it like a big question mark. A freestanding fabric screen blocked off a space over by the front windows. It was white with black reeds painted on it. Loretta could see the end of a massage table sticking out from behind the screen. A pair of big bare feet hung ov
er the side, pointing down.

  Her heart tried to jump out of her throat. Marvelli! she thought. Marvelli on a slab!

  She raced toward the table as Agnes was coming out of the kitchen area with a glazed blue bowl full of water.

  “Hey!” Agnes shouted. “What are you doing?”

  But Loretta ignored her. Tears were in her eyes, blurring her vision. She had to get to Marvelli. His name was a lump in her throat as she came around the screen. “Mar—”

  But then she saw the body that was attached to the feet. It was not pretty, and it was definitely not Marvelli. Not unless they’d force-fed him a vat of ice cream. She walked softly as she moved around the motionless body, taking it in cautiously, incredulously, like a beachcomber finding a beached whale. The body was lying facedown, and it would have been difficult to pinpoint the gender without the completely bald head. Rolls of fat bulged out from under the armpits. The butt was a huge double round mound that threatened to roll off the table and crash through the floor. Loretta moved in a little closer, then moved right back as soon as she got a whiff of him. It was pungent and vinegary. Filthy clothes were heaped on the floor like elephant droppings.

  “What are you doing?” Agnes hissed at her. “He’s sleeping.”

  “I can see that,” Loretta said. “He also stinks.”

  “Yes, of course, he stinks,” Agnes said indignantly. “He’s homeless. Poor people deserve massages, too, you know.”

  Loretta eyed the sleeping mountain of flesh and tried to imagine touching him. She glanced at Agnes. Better you than me, she thought.

  “Come. Come,” Agnes whispered sternly, fluttering her bony hands as if she were shooing geese. “You are going to wake him.”

  “Not likely,” Loretta muttered, as she moved around to the other side of the screen. She noticed that Vissa had stepped inside the doorway with Dragon. He was making a mess slurping up water from Agnes’s blue bowl.

  “I want you and your friend to leave this minute, and I want you to leave Dragon with me,” Agnes demanded.

  “And I want a house in Maui,” Loretta said. “Doesn’t mean I’m gonna get it.”

  Just the barest hint of color rose in Agnes’s colorless cheeks. “Get out right now or I’m calling the police.”

  “No, you’re not,” Loretta said. “You’re a squatter. The police will throw you out.”

  “Nonsense.”

  Loretta nodded at the octopus of extension cords plugged into a single power strip on the floor. Orange and blue cords snaked all through the loft. The source wire ran under the front door and out into the hallway. Agnes was clearly stealing her electricity from somewhere else. “Nonsense, huh?” Loretta said.

  Agnes grumbled something in a foreign language.

  “Where are you from?” Loretta asked. “Norway?”

  “Finland,” Agnes declared angrily.

  “Are you legal? I can get INS on your tail if you don’t watch it.”

  “Go on, call them,” Agnes shot back. “I have my green card.”

  “Loretta, let’s go,” Vissa called from across the room. “We’re not gonna get anything out of her. Believe me.”

  “And what is it that you want to get out of me? Huh?” Agnes said. “You’ve already stolen my Sunny and her dog.”

  “We haven’t ‘stolen’ anyone,” Loretta said. “Sunny left Dragon with us.”

  “I seriously doubt that.”

  “He’s a loaner dog,” Loretta said. “Ours is in the shop.”

  “Stop joking.” Agnes narrowed her eyes suspiciously. “You must be sleeping with my Sunny. Both of you. And now she has sent you here to rub my nose in it.”

  “We are not sleeping with Sunny,” Vissa said, moving as close as the leash would allow since Dragon was still working on the water. “We don’t go that way.”

  “Sunny goes all ways,” Agnes said. “That’s the whole problem.”

  “That’s what problem?” Loretta asked. “I thought you were her lover.”

  “One of her lovers.” Agnes crossed her ankles and sank to the floor, falling naturally into a half-lotus position. Loretta was impressed. She took the easy chair.

  “Are you saying that Sunny has other women?” Loretta asked.

  “Women, men, animals maybe, I don’t know. Her love for me is not like my love for her.” Agnes looked like a sad little doll, her hair falling limply over her face. “I am not going to let you find her. She has too many people in her life already.”

  “I told you,” Loretta said, “we don’t go that way. Sunny’s on the run with a man who kidnapped my boyfriend.”

  “You mean, the ice-cream man?” Agnes asked. “I warned Sunny about him. I told her he was no good.”

  “Listen to me,” Loretta said. “If the police catch her, she could get into a lot of trouble. She could go to prison. All I want is my boyfriend back in one piece. Help me find them before it’s too late.”

  Agnes became very quiet. Loretta could hear the fat man breathing behind the screen. Dragon finished the rest of the water and was pushing the bowl across the wood floor with his nose.

  Agnes might have been crying, but it was hard to tell. She spoke softly. “I can only think of one person who would get involved in such craziness.”

  “Who?”

  “The geek, who else?”

  “Who’s the geek?”

  “Thaddeus.” Agnes spat the name out as if it were a bitter taste in her mouth.

  “And who’s Thaddeus?”

  “Sunny’s other serious lover—supposedly. She wants us all to live together like Hansel and Gretel and the Gingerbread Man. I say no to that.”

  Loretta really didn’t want to hear Agnes’s problems right now. “Do you think this Thaddeus would get involved with a kidnapping?”

  “Yes, of course!” Agnes suddenly shrieked. “He is a geek! Isn’t it obvious?” Her outburst reverberated off the brick walls.

  The fat man snuffled and pointed his toes as he stretched his legs. He was awake. “Agnes, honey,” he called out. “Did’ja just leave me?”

  “No, Hank, I am right here.” She stood up to go to him. “Please leave,” she said to Loretta and Vissa. “You have told me bad things. Please go.”

  “Wait,” Loretta said. “Just tell me one thing.”

  “What?” Agnes was holding on to the edge of the screen, eager to get back to Hank the whale.

  “What’s Thaddeus’s last name?”

  “He has no last name. He is just Thaddeus.” She started to turn away.

  “Wait!” Loretta said. “Where can we find him?”

  “Where else do you find a geek? The circus, of course.” She disappeared behind the screen.

  The circus? Loretta thought.

  Dragon was at her feet, looking up at her expectantly.

  23

  It took Loretta and Vissa more than an hour to find the “circus.” When she finally saw it, Loretta doubted that it was the kind of circus she remembered from when she was a child. This circus was all by itself on a pier underneath the San Francisco Bay Bridge, and it wasn’t the kind of place you’d want to take the kids. A colorful sailcloth banner stretched between two poles gave the establishment’s full name: PHRANK’S TENT PHUL OF PHREAKS—AN ALTERNATIVE CIRCUS. Other banners with imitation old-time drawings advertised the main attractions: Kanisha the World’s Phattest Phreak, who wasn’t fat at all—just very hip-hop. Paul the Platypus Boy. Bim, Bam, and Boom the Siamese Terrier Triplets. Henrietta the Human Cell Phone. Yvette the Cigar-Smoking Deer. And Thaddeus, the World’s Leakiest Man.

  Vissa had parked the car at the end of the pier, and they had walked out to the tent with Dragon on the leash intently sniffing the weathered timbers. He was still under the influence of Elmer Fudge Whirl, doing everything a dog should but doing it very slowly and deliberately. He hadn’t gone to the bathroom in a while, and every time he sniffed and circled, Loretta and Vissa watched him closely, but he always seemed to forget what he was doing and would have to
start sniffing all over again, trying to remember his original intention. He was doing that right now, holding up their progress.

  “This is gonna take forever,” Loretta said, holding the leash and heaving an annoyed sigh.

  “I don’t think he should go in there anyway,” Vissa said. She’d gone ahead and was peering through the flaps of the big top. It was pretty dark inside. “One of us should stay out here with the dog,” she said, walking back toward Loretta and Dragon. “I’ll duke you for who goes in. Odds or evens?” Vissa held her fist up by her collarbone, ready to throw down one or two fingers to determine who’d go talk to Thaddeus.

  “I’ll go,” Loretta volunteered. She was still worried that Krupnick had dumped Marvelli somewhere, and she felt that she should be the one to find him if he was here. Her hands were trembling a bit as she eyed the banners, assuming that this place would be filled with all kinds of weirdness, dangerous weirdness. She imagined finding Marvelli in a magician’s box, sawed in half—but for real, no tricks.

  “You sure you want to go?” Vissa asked. “You look a little shaky.”

  “I’m okay,” Loretta said, as she handed the leash to Vissa and walked toward the big top.

  Yeah, I’m just dandy, she thought to herself.

  The box office at the entrance to the tent was empty, so she just walked right in. Her eyes didn’t adjust to the dark right away, so she walked slowly, feeling the sawdust under her feet. Remembering the Siamese triplet dogs and the cigar-smoking deer, she hoped she didn’t feel anything else under her feet.

  Gradually she was able to make out shapes and shadows. Several small stages were set up around the tent. There were no bleachers or chairs, so Phrank’s Tent Phul of Phreaks was apparently more of a glorified sideshow than a circus. At the far end of the tent, Loretta spotted a slit of light. Another flap, she assumed. Walking carefully, she glided through the sawdust toward the light. When she flipped it open, bright sunlight blinded her. She shaded her eyes and squinted at the shimmering water on the bay.

 

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