by Lori Leger
“Hearing you say that makes me feel better, babe. I miss you too. Gotta go.”
“Talk to you soon, and I’ll see you later.” She’d vowed early on in the relationship never to tell her Marine goodbye.
“Roger that.”
She heard the series of clicks of the sat phone cutting off, hugged her phone close for a moment, as though she was hugging him. Haley fell back against her mattress and allowed herself a few minutes of tears. Tears of relief, mixed with longing and loneliness. It still astounded her that she could feel so much for a man she’d met three months ago.
Finished with her tears for the moment, she sat up and dried her eyes, determined to be stronger. If Ben could handle the day-to-day dangers of being in Afghanistan, and being away from his family for months at a time, it shouldn’t be this difficult for her.
Another four months and he’d be back in Hawaii. No more deployments and no more worrying about him. By this time, next year, he’d be out of the Marines.
She stood and headed toward the door, whispering the one prayer she repeated so often she didn’t have to think about it.
“Keep him safe, God. Please, keep him safe.”
December 24th, 9:30 am (Beaumont, TX)
Haley exited her bedroom and halted, lifting her nose in appreciation of the smells bombarding her. Her stomach growled at the tantalizing aromas of turkey roasting in the oven, along with a multitude of other savory foods cooking on her mother’s stove-top.
“G’morning, Mom.” She gave her mother a hug and reached for the same juice glass she’d been drinking from for fifteen years. “Is it okay if I check on Dakota before helping you in here?”
Angie Broussard reached for a mixing bowl in the cabinet. “Sure, sweetie. I think your dad fed her already, but you go on ahead.”
Haley downed a glass of juice, cringing at the cold against her sensitive teeth, and then grabbed a biscuit from the baking sheet. She seated herself on the bench to slip on her boots, and looked up when someone knocked at the side door. She approached the door, sliding the last couple of steps in her socks. Ginger Chaisson, from the local florist shop, stood in the doorway holding a large bouquet of flowers. Familiar with her by now, Haley opened the full-view glass door to let her step inside.
The delivery woman beamed up at her. “Got another delivery for you, Haley. Two days in a row—that boy must be some kind of crazy about you.”
“Oh my gosh, they’re gorgeous.” Haley gushed over the beautifully adorned Christmas themed arrangement. The bright red basket contained a dozen roses, mixed with greenery and sparkly red and gold fillers, giving it a festive appearance. “Thanks so much for taking the trouble to deliver this, Ms. Ginger.”
“Oh honey, we fight over who gets to bring these to you every week. We were almost as excited as you are to get this new order.” She leaned in closer. “Because that means he’s still out there, alive and well. Tell your young man we said to have a Merry Christmas, will you?”
“I’ll do that, and thanks again—so very much. Merry Christmas.”
“Merry Christmas to you, Haley, and hopefully, I’ll see you next week.” Ginger waved and headed off toward her delivery van.
Haley took a few moments to admire her roses then got back to the business of seeing to Dakota.
A half hour later, she’d put a large pot of potatoes to boil, when she got a text that elicited a loud squeal of excitement.
“SKYPE IN 10 MINS.”
“Oh my God, he’s going to Skype me. They must have driven back to FOB Delhi.” She took two steps toward her bedroom, and then stopped to stare at her mother, sending her a look of desperate pleading. “Mom, I don’t know how long he’ll be able to talk.”
Her mother waved her off with a sweep of her hand. “Go. There’s nothing left to do that I can’t finish myself.”
Haley ran to her room, thankful she’d washed her hair and bothered with a little eye make-up this morning. She started her laptop, set it up on her desk, and signed in to her Skype account. Then she arranged the flowers so they’d be visible to Ben. She applied a little lip gloss, gave her hair a quick touch-up, and then heard the familiar pop of the Skype program. She sat in her desk chair and gasped as his handsome face appeared on-screen, looking every bit as thrilled as she was.
“Hey baby.”
He smiled and took a deep breath. “Merry Christmas, beautiful. How’s my girl today?”
Her cheeks hurt from the ear to ear smile plastered across her face. Did he really have to ask? She gave her head a slight shake. “I can’t believe I’m seeing you. I was expecting a phone call maybe, but not this.” She sighed, trying to focus through the tears in her eyes. “I miss you so much, Ben, and Merry Christmas to you, too.”
He focused on something beside her. “How do you like your roses?”
She wiped at her tears. “They’re beautiful, and these are so fragrant. I wish you could smell them.” She held up the basket, turning it so he could see it better.
“Excellent—they did a good job for you, then.”
“Yes, they did,” she said, blinking back tears.
“Hey, now. What’s wrong?” He reached his hand out toward the screen, almost as though he was trying to touch her.
“I’ve been dying to see you.”
“If you can make the drive to Lake Erin at some point tomorrow, you can see me again. I’m going to open gifts with my family during another Skype session and I’d really like you to be there. I already mentioned it to mom and she said they’d be thrilled to have you and your family if they’d like to come along.” He leaned in a little closer. “And uh, don’t tell her I told you, but my mom has a little something for you over there.”
“She didn’t have to do that, but if it means getting to see that handsome face of yours two days in a row, you bet your ass I’ll be there. Only if you’re sure your mom won’t mind sharing the Skype call with me. I’ll be alone, though. My parents have plans for tomorrow. What time should I be there?”
“I told her 16:00 hours your time.”
“That’s 4:00 p.m. right? That means it’ll be …” She stopped to do a quick, ten-digit calculation. “It’ll be 2:30 in the morning over there.”
“You’re getting the hang of converting the time-zone difference.”
She held up both hands. “Only if I’m allowed to use my fingers.” She waited for his laughter to die down. “Seriously, Ben, as much as we love seeing you, I don’t think any of us want you to lose so much sleep, especially if you have to go out on another mission any time soon.”
“They’re letting us rest up for the holidays, Haley. Don’t worry about me. So, how’s Miss Red Dakota doing? You got any races coming up?”
“She’s getting lazy. I haven’t competed in a month. But I have one next weekend in Lafayette.” She sent him a pout. “I wish you could be there.”
“Imagine I’m in the stands watching you, and post the video to Facebook so I can see it.”
“I’ll be sure to do that. So, do y’all do anything special over there for Christmas?”
“By the time I got here, my box of goodies from you and mom was waiting here for me. That, alone, made it Christmas. Oh, and we got a batch of Christmas cards and pictures and stuff from a bunch of kids at the school where my mom teaches. Those cards and drawings were really entertaining. Some of them were very creative.”
Haley looked up at the sound of knocking on her bedroom door. She laughed as her mom, dad, and brother entered, each of them decked out in a red and white Santa hat. “Ah, Ben, I think Santa’s elves are here for a visit.”
Haley’s mom waved at the screen. “Hi Benjamin, we wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas.”
Ben laughed and nodded. “Thank you, Ms. Angie. Merry Christmas to you, too.”
Tex stepped up, leaning toward Haley’s laptop screen. “Hey man, I been where you are, so I know how bad it sucks being over there for Christmas. We wanted you to know we’re all over here wishing you the
best and praying for your safe return.” He gave him a salute. “Semper Fi, Corporal Bonin.”
Ben saluted him back. “Semper Fi, Sergeant Broussard—and thanks. It means a lot to see a fine, upstanding, retired Marine such as you, wearing that hat just to give me a laugh.”
Tex guffawed with laughter. “Hey, glad I could help. Now, we know you don’t really want to see us, so we’ll let you get back to little sister, here.”
“Thanks everybody, you made my day.”
Haley waited until her family had left the room before turning to Ben’s image. “Aw, that was sweet of them.”
“It sure was, but where’s your Santa hat?”
She reached across her desk for a similar hat, and slipped it on her head. “Ta da!” She struck a pose as Ben’s smile lit up the screen. “You like?”
He nodded. “You’re going to have to wear that for me the next time you see me. That’s kinda hot.”
“I guess that would depend on what I’m wearing with it.”
“Or not wearing with it,” he added quickly.
She laughed as he tried to stifle one of several yawns she’d witnessed since the beginning of their session. “You’re tired, aren’t you, Benjamin? Why don’t you go get some sleep since I’m going to see you again tomorrow?”
“I will, besides I think Sanchez is over there chomping at the bit to get at this thing. You’re sure you’ll be at mom’s tomorrow?”
“I’ll be there, Ben.”
He nodded. “Good, now say it for me, babe.”
She beamed at him, repeating the mantra they’d come up with. “A year is nothing compared to forever.”
“That’s my girl. Take care of yourself.”
“You take care of yourself. I’ll see you later.” She placed her hand flat on the screen and he followed suit, the outline of his large hand overlapping hers.
“Roger that.”
He gave her one last smile before she heard that dreaded blip, like a bubble bursting.
And like that, he was gone.
Once her face disappeared from the monitor, he pushed away from the makeshift desk. “It’s all yours, Sanchez.”
“Sorry Bones, but the wife’s in the hospital having our second kid.”
“Hey, congrats, man. That’s great.”
“No it ain’t. She ain’t due for two fucking weeks and I was supposed to be in for this one. This is the second time I’m gonna miss the birth of my kid. So the doc said we can Skype the delivery. That’s why I’ve gotta have this spot, man. I can’t have some douche behind me getting a free peep show of my wife’s privates.”
“No, I guess not.”
Sanchez sat at the computer and shook his head. “I mean, I’m thankful for this opportunity, you know? But I can’t believe I’m stuck in this shit hole instead of home, holding my wife’s hand while she gives birth to my kid. This shit ain’t right. It just ain’t right.”
“Good luck, man. I hope everything goes well.” Ben walked away, not knowing what else to say to the guy.
One thing he knew for damn sure, that wouldn’t happen to him. By the time he’d be ready to have a kid, he’d long be out of the Corps. He walked away, revisiting the plans he’d made. He had his future all mapped out—like laying out a GPS course for a mission. He’d move into the house his mom and step-dad rented for his two younger siblings, both attending college in Lake Coburn. It was plenty big enough for all three of them.
Two years later he’d have his Associate’s Degree in electronic instrumentation. Yeah—get a good job—make some decent money. Previously, his plans had only included himself, and how he would stay single long enough to build up a sizable savings account before making any major purchases.
Now he found himself thinking in different terminology—we, instead of me … us, instead of I … and our, rather than my.
Was it too soon to think that way about a woman? He pictured Haley, her brown eyes sparkling with excitement and unadulterated joy, as well as a few unshed tears. She was genuine—he’d known that within minutes of introducing himself to her at Red’s club in Lake Coburn three months earlier.
He remembered her scent, her satiny smooth skin, the feel of her in his arms as they danced that night. How much deeper his feelings had grown for his little horsewoman by the end of their time together. Hell, when it came to quality time, he figured they’d crammed about as much of that into his time off as they possibly could. They’d camped around a bon fire with family and friends, gone teal hunting one morning, spent a great afternoon watching her do her thing at a barrel race competition, had some time with her family, and even more with his.
If they didn’t know everything there was to know about each other by now, it wasn’t for lack of trying. From long talks while lounging lazily on her grandparents’ creaky old porch swing, to phone conversations long past the time her Paw Paw had chased him off—he’d learned so many things about her.
Her favorite flowers were roses; she loved chocolate hazelnut spread, especially with strawberries, and cookie dough ice cream. She tolerated buttered popcorn, which happened to be her family’s nickname for her, but had an absolute addiction to sunflower seeds. Her two nervous habits were chewing her nails and popping her wrists and she was ticklish as all hell. Snakes scared the absolute piss out of her, but spiders or bugs didn’t—probably because she spent so much time in dusty old tack rooms, and it freaked her out if her arms or legs were constrained in any way.
Her idea of fun was a friendly game of washers, and one round—never two—of a drinking game called Ring of Fire. He knew she got grouchy with too little sleep, but her kind of grouchy was something he could live with.
Haley’s parents had raised her as he’d been raised; to act responsibly, work hard, and treat others with respect. She adored her parents, grandparents, and her older brother.
Of all her little idiosyncrasies, the one he loved the most was her soft heartedness. She couldn’t watch an SPCA commercial without crying, and wanted to take every stray pet home with her. The thought of anyone abusing an old person, a child, or an animal turned her livid.
What you saw with Haley was what you got—a kind-hearted person with a good head on her shoulders. There wasn’t a single sign of a high maintenance, materialistic, drama-queen in that tight little package of drop-dead gorgeousness.
And damn if all he could think about was spending every waking moment with her. She was the first, the only woman, he’d ever come close to feeling this way about.
Ben made his way to Sniper platoon’s tent, and dropped down on his bunk. He supposed it was too soon to know for sure, but at this rate, the odds of him feeling this way about anyone else hovered somewhere between slim and absolute zero. And those were the kind of odds he could live with.
He closed his eyes and pictured the beautifully appreciative smile she’d graced him with over the flowers during their Skype session. He couldn’t wait to surprise her with her real Christmas gift tomorrow.
He grinned, thinking about the plan he’d put into place his last Saturday home.
He couldn’t wait to see the look on her face.
Haley knew if she gave herself time to think about the brief Skype session with Ben, she would be a sobbing mass of uselessness for the rest of the day. Instead, she poured herself into helping her mom with the Christmas Eve meal preparations.
Matt’s innocent query as to whether she was okay got him a hand in his face for his trouble. Hand signal for I can’t talk about it. Her brother had given her a sad smile and a brief hug as show of support.
The arrival of an aunt, an uncle and half-dozen cousins brought further distraction. The bustle and noise kept her too busy to think about Ben … almost. She couldn’t help but imagine him being on the other side of the earth celebrating Christmas with his Marine brothers instead of blood relatives. Every so often, she’d look up and catch Matt’s gaze on her. He’d give her a wink and an understanding half-nod, as if to say everything would be all right.<
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If only she could be sure of that.
They squeezed in around the dining table for her father’s variation of the standard blessing of the meal, adding special thanks for his son’s safe return. As he finished, the sound of Matt clearing his voice across the table drew her attention.
“Thanks for that, Pop. I’d like to add a request for God to watch over all the military personnel around the world. Many of them are deployed and spending this day with their other family rather than blood relatives. I called them family as well, because even though they aren’t blood, they are all brothers.” He punctuated the last words with a slight lift of his brow in his sister’s direction.
The sound of chairs scuffling against the hardwood floors resounded throughout the room as people began seating themselves. Haley eased her way to her big brother’s side and gave him an appreciative hug.
“What’s that for?” he asked.
“For making me feel better about Ben being over there.”
“It’s true, you know. He’s with his brothers, like when Mitch and I were there.”
“Bros before Hos?” She sent him a wink and he burst into laughter.
“Not exactly the point I wanted to make.”
She sighed and closed her eyes, picturing Benjamin as he’d appeared during the Skype session, his face drawn and looking underfed and exhausted. “I know he’s not eating enough. He’s a little thinner than he was a couple of months ago.”
“They aren’t starving him, Sis. It’s his choice as to how much food he wants to bring on missions. The problem is, those Marines have an ungodly amount of stuff they have to haul around in their packs. They tend to ration during missions.” He shrugged. “Unfortunately, that means dropping some weight.”
Haley’s clenched jaw was like a neon arrow flashing her distress. Matt laid his arm heavily across her shoulders. “Don’t you worry about your Marine, Haley girl. Ben will eat like a horse and lift weights to bulk up as soon as he gets to Dwyer or wherever they send him towards the end of his deployment—even more so, when he’s back at Kaneohe Bay.”