No sooner were the words out of the professor’s mouth than a spooky creaking sound echoed through the rotunda.
“Look out!” someone cried. “Head for the halls!”
But there was no time for anyone to get out of the rotunda. In a matter of seconds, the entire G-rex skeleton buckled, toppled in on itself, and came crashing to the floor. The rotunda was littered with the shattered pieces. A great cloud of bone dust filled the air. Fake bone dust, that is.
Fortunately, no one was injured. As everyone brushed the dust from their clothes, Actual Factual said into the microphone, “At this time, I would like to rename the exhibit. It is Outrageous rex: King of the Giant Hoaxes!”
Now the rotunda filled with laughter as well as fake bone dust.
And so ends the tale of the G-rex bones. Fake G-rex bones, that is. Actual Factual was almost sorry to see the debris from the shattered skeleton cleared away. Because that left the rotunda empty once more. Ferdy told him not to be discouraged, that someday he might find a real G-rex. But, of course, Actual Factual knew that that was impossible. For the G-rex was not just an imaginary creature. It was an impossible imaginary creature.
Actual Factual could only hope for the possible. So he hoped for the day when a complete T-rex skeleton would grace the rotunda in the Hall of Dinosaurs.
And to this day he is still looking for one. And still hoping.
Excerpt from The Berenstain Bears® and the Phenom in the Family
Chapter 1
The Rumor
“A rumor’s going around that there’s gonna be a special announcement before classes start today,” said Barry Bruin.
“It ain’t no rumor, it’s a fact,” said Too-Tall Grizzly. “And I know what the announcement’s about.”
The cubs were gathered in the schoolyard, waiting for the morning bell to ring. Barry was right: a rumor had indeed been going around about an announcement. But it had been started by Too-Tall himself. That way, once everyone was buzzing about the upcoming announcement, Too-Tall could step in and make his own dramatic announcement about the announcement. Nobody was sure how he found out about these things. Did he sneak around the school offices, listening in on conversations? Not likely. Did he have a ring of spies in the school administration? Even less likely. But somehow he always knew what was going to happen before it happened.
“So, tell us, Big Guy,” said Queenie McBear, poking her on-again, off-again boyfriend in the stomach, “what’s it about?”
“Swimming pool,” said Too-Tall matter-of-factly.
“A swimming pool?” said Queenie. “You mean here at school?”
Too-Tall nodded.
“They’re gonna build a swimming pool?” said Barry.
Too-Tall nodded again. “And you know what that means,” he said.
“Swimming classes!” said Brother Bear.
“Maybe even a swimming team!” added Sister Bear.
“Oh, my …,” said Ferdy Factual, putting a hand to his mouth. He looked worried.
That made Too-Tall chuckle. He had guessed that the new pool would cause great excitement among the student body—and great anxiety among the students about their bodies. Especially students like Nerdy Ferdy. There was a school joke that Ferdy was a thirty-eight-pound weakling, and twenty pounds of that was his brain.
Skuzz couldn’t wait to add to Ferdy’s anxiety. “And the classes are gonna be code!” he said.
“Of course they’ll be cold,” said Barry. “Unless they give us a heated pool, that is.”
“Don’t pay no attention to Skuzz,” said Too-Tall. “He’s an idiot.” He popped his deputy on the shoulder with a big fist. “You don’t say it code, moron! It’s coed. Co-ed. It means boys and girls together. Get it?”
“I know what it means,” said Skuzz. “I just don’t know how to say it.”
“If I had a nickel for every thing you don’t know,” said Too-Tall, “I’d be richer than Squire Grizzly.”
“Gee, I’d better get a bathing suit,” said Ferdy to no one in particular.
“Now, don’t panic, little guy,” said Too-Tall. “Everybody’s gotta wear school-issue black bathing suits.”
“Oh, no!” gasped Queenie. “I wouldn’t be caught dead in a school-issue black bathing suit!”
“Whaddya mean?” said Too-Tall. “You’d look good in a black bathing suit.”
Queenie blushed in spite of herself. “Gee, thanks,” she said. “But school-issue? They probably look like the suits my mother wears.”
Too-Tall shrugged. “I’ve seen your mother in a bathing suit,” he said, “and she don’t look half bad.”
“That’s enough, you big oaf!” snapped Queenie. “You can flirt with me all you like, but how dare you flirt with my mother!” She stuck her nose in the air and stalked off.
Too-Tall looked puzzled. “Hey, what gives, Queen? Your mother ain’t even here!” He looked at his gang. “What was I supposed to say? That her mother’s ugly?”
“No, boss,” said Vinnie.
“Of course not,” said Smirk.
“She’s just a fickle girl,” added Skuzz.
“Skuzz, dear,” said Bonnie Brown, “a guy who can’t pronounce ‘coed’ shouldn’t use big words like ‘fickle.’”
“Hey,” said Too-Tall, “if I’d thought this pool thing would start a spat like this, I wouldn’t have brought it up in the first place.”
Now Queenie came slinking back. “I’m sorry, Big Guy,” she cooed. “I know you didn’t mean it. So, who’s gonna be the swimming teacher?”
“Now I ain’t tellin’ ya,” said Too-Tall.
Queenie grabbed Too-Tall’s left arm and twisted it.
“Not even if you twist my arm,” said Too-Tall.
Queenie twisted a little harder, but then stopped because the bell had just rung to start the school day.
Chapter 2
“Why, When I Was in School …”
As usual, Too-Tall turned out to be right. Before classes started, there was a special announcement over the loudspeaker from Mr. Honeycomb, the principal. And it was indeed about the construction of an indoor swimming pool, to be completed in less than two weeks. The announcement closed with some details about swimming classes and tryouts for the new swimming team.
By the time Brother and Sister got home from school, they were almost talked out about the new pool. But they had enough left to tell Mama and Papa, and also Grizzly Gramps and Grizzly Gran, who had come over for dinner.
“Hey, guess what?” cried Sister as she and Brother burst into the family room, where the grown-ups were chatting.
“Haven’t the faintest idea,” said Gramps, with a wink at Gran.
“Me neither,” said Gran, with a wink at Mama.
“I’ll take a crack at it,” said Papa, looking up from the afternoon newspaper. “Bear Country School is going to have a swimming pool.”
“How did you know?” said Brother.
“Says so right here in the Beartown Gazette,” said Papa. He read: “‘Bear Country School’s new swimming pool will be finished soon. Coed swim classes will be taught by Mr. Mervyn Grizzmeyer, who will also coach the new swimming team.’”
Mervyn “Bullhorn” Grizzmeyer was the school’s vice principal and general sports coach. He was nicknamed Bullhorn because he didn’t need one.
“Merv’ll be a great swimming coach,” said Gramps.
“Gee, I don’t know about that,” said Sister.
“Why not?” asked Mama. “What’s wrong with Mr. Grizzmeyer?”
“I just can’t get used to the idea of Mr. G in a bathing suit,” said Sister. “He’s not exactly the male model type.”
“That’s because he’s not a male model,” said Papa. “He’s a vice principal and a coach. Heck, if that’s your only complaint, I’d say things look pretty rosy.”
“Well, there is one other thing …,” said Sister.
“What’s that?” said Papa.
Sister seemed embarrassed to tell them. S
o Brother did it for her. “All the girls are upset because we have to wear school-issue black bathing suits,” he said.
“Oh, my goodness! What a disaster!” said Papa in a sarcastic voice. “What do you think they’re running over there—a country club? Why, when I was in school, we were lucky to have running water!”
“And when I was in school,” said Gramps, “we were lucky to have indoor plumbing!”
“Sister, I should think you’d be more concerned about making the team than about your bathing suit,” scolded Papa.
“Sis?” said Brother. “On the swimming team?”
“Why not?” said Papa. “Last summer, if I remember correctly, she turned herself into a pretty good little swimmer.”
“Pretty good?” said Sister. “Little?”
“It’s just an expression, dear,” said Mama.
“Papa knows you’re a big girl and an excellent swimmer.”
“Oh, come off it,” said Brother. “No offense, Sis, but you’re younger and smaller than all the other cubs who’ll be trying out for the team. Let’s see now—I’ll make the team for my crawl, Cousin Fred will make it for his backstroke, Queenie for her butterfly, and Bonnie for her breaststroke. Unless, that is, Too-Tall and the gang beat us all out.”
“You mean,” said Sister, “unless I beat you all out.”
Brother looked at Sister in mock amazement. Then he threw his head back and laughed. It wasn’t a real, spontaneous laugh. It was a fake laugh, designed to make Sister feel ridiculous.
“All right, Brother,” said Mama, “that’ll be enough of that. You cubs come help me and Gran get dinner ready. The men can set the dining room table later.”
“And do the dishes,” added Gran.
“I’ll dry!” said Gramps before Papa could.
About the Authors
Stan and Jan Berenstain began writing the Berenstain Bears series in 1962, with The Big Honey Hunt. Since then, more than 250 Berenstain Bears books have been published and sales of the series are nearing 300 million. Stan and Jan have left behind a legacy of arguably the bestselling children’s book series ever. Making the books has long been a family affair, with son Mike Berenstain writing and illustrating new stories about everyone’s favorite Bear family. You can visit the Berenstains online at www.berenstainbears.com.
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Copyright
The Berenstain Bears and the G-Rex Bones
Copyright © 1999 by Berenstain Publishing, Inc.
All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the nonexclusive, nontransferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.
www.harpercollinschildrens.com
ISBN 978-0-06-218871-7
EPub Edition © JUNE 2012 ISBN 9780062188717
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Originally published in 1999 by Random House, Inc.
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The Berenstain Bears Chapter Book: The G-Rex Bones Page 4