by Pandora Pine
She nodded emphatically, sending her dirty, blond hair flying around her face to whip against Carter. “What’s your name, mine’s Jilly.”
“Hi Jilly. I’m Carter.”
She responded by running around him and plunking herself into his lap. She let out a contented sigh and rested her face against Carter’s heart.
Carter wasn’t sure what to do with his lap full of the tiny girl. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close. She smelled like rosemary soap but her hair was like a rat’s nest, uncombed and stuck together in clumps. “How old are you?”
“Four summers.” She held up three dirty fingers to show him. “How old are you?”
“I’m twenty-six summers.” It felt good to hold the little girl close. He’d always dreamed about being a father and knew he would be a great uncle once his sister’s were settled and having children of their own. His heart pinched over thoughts of Cadence and Bree and he hoped they weren’t frantic over not being able to find him.
“Wow, that’s really old.” Jilly pushed back to look at Carter, her eyes wide. She ran her fingers over his stubbled cheeks, giggling when the whiskers tickled her.
Carter laughed. “Which of the soldiers is your daddy?” He looked out over the sparring men, trying to figure out the likely candidates.
“Don’t have a daddy no more,” she said softly. “He’s in heaven with me mum.” Jilly cuddled closer to Carter, pressing her face against his chest.
Carter held the tiny girl tightly. Knowing what it was like to be an orphan he rocked her against his chest, wishing there was a better way to ease her grief.
“He was killed in battle,” she said, suddenly brightening.
“He sounds very brave.” Losing soldiers in battle was a way of life here, but that didn’t mean it made it any easier for families to deal with. This tiny child was alone in the world and relying on her clan to see to her needs.
“Just like Fionn. I wish he could be my daddy now.” She sighed and turned to find Fionn among the warriors.
“How come?” Carter hadn’t given any thought to the idea of Fionn becoming a father one day. He was surly and downright rude at times, but Carter had no doubt he would love and protect his family fiercely.
“Because he protects everyone and wouldn’t let anything hurt me.”
“Are you interested in fighting or in becoming a nanny?” Fionn asked sarcastically when he reached Carter’s side.
“Fionn!” Jilly yelled, abandoning Carter’s lap to hug Fionn’s leg.
Fionn bent to lift the small child into his arms. “Hello, my pretty,” he said, hugging her tightly.
“Don’t be mad at Carter. He’s my new friend.” Her little face scrunched into a frown.
Fionn bit his bottom lip to keep from laughing. “Oh, is he?”
Jilly nodded and hugged his neck.
Smiling, he set the little girl down. “Run along and play. I will see you later.”
“Bye, Fionn.” Jilly waved. “Bye, Carter,” she yelled before running off.
Carter turned to watch her go. She rejoined the group of kids around her age who were chasing each other around. The kids seemed happy to have her back. “She told me she’s an orphan. Who cares for her?”
“Jilly stays with Aggie at night. They are not related by blood but Aggie has a small bed for the child to sleep in. Jilly comes out to play with the other children while Aggie works in the kitchens.”
Carter frowned. It didn’t seem an ideal situation for a growing child not to have anyone around to see to her needs during the day. Maybe he could talk to Fionn about adopting Jilly like she wanted once he managed to save Fionn’s life in the coming battle. “So,” Carter said, turning his attention back to the sparring warriors. “What is it I should be paying the most attention to here?”
Fionn smiled and took a moment to watch his men. “Pay particular attention to how the men stand with their weight on their back foot. James in particular has perfect form.” Fionn pointed to a blond man with dazzling blue eyes before turning his attention back to Carter. He reached a hand down to Carter to pull him up to his feet.
Carter came to his feet easily, colliding with the solid wall that was Fionn’s broad chest. He wanted nothing more than to stand on tip toe and kiss Fionn’s full mouth until they were both breathless with need. Figuring it wasn’t appropriate in front of the soldiers, he turned away from Fionn to watch their mock battles instead. He pulled his hand out of Fionn’s and focused his attention on James and his footwork.
“Ashamed to hold hands with me in front of all these handsome warriors, princess?” Fionn sneered, before stomping off toward his men.
“Fionn, wait!” Carter watched in shock as Fionn moved back among his men, refusing to turn and acknowledge him. What the fuck just happened? It wasn’t like Fionn to be insecure about anything. He was usually the opposite with so much cocky confidence Carter wanted to smack him. He debated going after his stubborn warrior or giving him time to calm down and find his own good sense again. He decided on the latter. It was time he have a long-overdue conversation with Islynn.
27
Islynn’s cottage stood at the back of the castle. It was made of wood with a thatched roof. Carter could see wood smoke coming from her river stone chimney. It was a comforting smell, reminding him of countless backyard bonfires with his family singing bawdy Irish tavern songs that Brigid had taught them.
He was about to knock on her door when she spoke from within. “Enter and be blessed, Carter, son of Carlyle.”
He didn’t put much stock in psychics or mystical things he could not explain with his own five senses but it unsettled him that she knew he was coming. “Good afternoon, Islynn,” he said with more good cheer than he felt. His disagreement with Fionn was weighing heavily on his heart. He should have gone after Fionn and showed him just how unashamed of him he really was. He could only hope he could make it up to Fionn later.
“You have much on your mind. Please sit.” Islynn indicated an empty chair for him to take while she brought a pot of nettle tea to the table. She watched him closely as she poured them each a cup of the steaming brew.
Carter nodded and sighed. He was about to explain the situation with Fionn when he felt something brushing against his leg. Janus, Islynn’s strange cat, was twining herself between his legs. “Hello, beautiful,” Carter cooed at the cat who responded with a purr. Turning back to Islynn, he tried to figure out where to begin. He did have a lot on his mind and had no idea where to start.
“Begin with what troubles you most,” she offered with a smile and took a sip of her tea.
Carter’s gaze narrowed on the healer. “Are you reading my mind?”
She gave him a shy smile. “No, Carter, I am reading your soul. Your slumped posture indicates something is weighing heavily upon you. You smile, yet it does not reach your eyes. There is a tremor in your right hand when you lift your cup to your lips. I am simply observing the clues your body uses to betray you.”
It was a logical explanation, but he couldn’t help thinking Islynn’s knowledge went beyond body language. “Fionn thinks I’m ashamed of his attentions because I didn’t kiss him in front of his men.”
“Ah, and our lord stomped off like an unruly toddler who was overdue for his nap? You will set things to rights with him soon enough.” She laughed.
Carter laughed along with her. He would get Fionn to listen to reason and then kiss him until Fionn threw him on their bed and pounced on him. Islynn’s laugh was sweet and melodic, but not enough to distract him from the real reason for his visit. “You’ve seen his death.” It was a statement, not a question.
She shivered, wrapping her purple shawl more tightly around her shoulders. “As have you,” she challenged back, her voice steady and strong.
Images of that day on Fairy Hill flashed through his mind. He saw Fionn wave, heard him call out and saw him fall. “Can I stop it?” Carter asked, gripping the heavy, earthenware mug tightly.
“I know not,” she shrugged.
“Don’t play games with me, Islynn! This is too important. He is too important.” Carter was close to the edge, barely hanging onto his emotions. This was hard enough without Islynn hiding what she knew from him.
“I speak the truth, Carter. I have not yet seen how your appearance has altered the fabric of time.” She set her hand over Carter’s and squeezed.
Altered the fabric of time? He wished he’d paid more attention to Doctor Who and all of the other science fiction movies Bree loved so much. All of this space-time continuum stuff was way above his head. “I’m sorry.” Carter faltered. He’d come here to save Fionn and in the process had somehow fallen in love with the gruff warrior. “I-I can’t lose him.”
“I understand. My own soulmate repeatedly slips through my fingers and back into time. What is your plan to save Fionn from the reaper?”
“I asked him to teach me to fight. I figured if I had his back I could protect him and change things.” Islynn mentioning the fabric of time made him realize the way he’d seen the Battle of Boyne Bog unfold originally was not the way it would unfold now. His appearance here changed things. It wasn’t a matter of running up to Fionn in the crucial moment to save him, but in keeping him safe at all times. It seemed a Herculean task.
She nodded noncommittally. “Time grows short. You have but a matter of days to learn. The battle draws nigh.”
“Do I tell him what I know?” He had been mulling over telling Fionn about the battle and why he was really here. He just wasn’t sure Fionn would believe him and now with them fighting, it might be harder than ever to make him see reason.
“No! You must keep what you know to yourself. Time must be allowed to continue along its course.” Islynn pulled her hand back from Carter and twisted them together nervously. Janus jumped into her lap and began purring.
“And what if he ends up dead again? I watched him die once. I can’t watch it again especially now that I…” Carter stopped short of confessing his feelings. Fionn should be the first person to hear his words of love.
“I understand, Carter. I too have had to stand by and watch my love die time after time, unable to stop the hand of fate that rips her from me.” She dashed unshed tears from her icy blue eyes. “Do all that you can to prevent his death. Just know it will not be easy.”
“I know. I’ve never held a sword in my life.” He’d watched the seemingly easy way Fionn’s men sparred with each other but knew those sword skills had been honed over years of training and practice.
“That is not what I what I am saying. You mean to take a life from the reaper’s clutches. Do not be surprised when he takes payment in another form.”
“His life for mine?” It sounded almost biblical, like an eye for an eye. Regardless of the barbarity of it, he was willing to lay down his life for the man he loved.
“Possibly so,” she said uneasily, running her fingers through the cat’s fur.
“I’ll gladly give my life for Fionn’s.” He meant it. He would sacrifice his life if it meant Fionn kept his.
28
Carter was nowhere to be found. Once Fionn realize what an ass he had been stomping off like a child, he had gone in search of his lover. His first stop was to see Cerberus, relief washing through him when he found the stallion in his stall. At least he had not ridden off outside the castle’s walls. Not finding him anywhere else in the stable, he headed to the foaling barn to see Temperance, figuring Carter would be spending time with the expectant mare.
When he discovered Temperance alone in her stall, his heart started to thunder in his chest. He took off running for the castle. Remembering what Carter said about men hurting him when they found out he preferred men over women made him wonder if he was afraid the warriors of Moone would harm him if he showed affection for another man. He would strike down any man who dared harm a hair on his perfect head, but Carter had no way of knowing that.
A cold shiver of dread snaked around his heart as he pounded up the stairs and into the great hall. If he were unhappy enough, would Carter return to his own time? He slowed his pace when he saw his sister sitting near the large fireplace.
“Brother, what troubles you?” Fianna asked.
“I cannot find Carter,” he panted, nearly frantic. “Have you seen him?”
“Not today. It is plain to see you are developing feelings for your foundling. It’s nice to see you are finally ready to settle down,” she said with a smile.
“I must find him.” He ran up the stairs toward Carter’s chamber. Not bothering to knock, he burst into the room. To his relief, all of Carter’s things were still where they were this morning.
Was Fianna right? Was he developing feelings for Carter? It was true he enjoyed spending time in Carter’s company as well as the intimate times they shared, but that didn’t equate to wanting to settle down? Did it?
Regardless of what he wanted for his future with Carter, all he could do now was wait for his angry lover to return so he could apologize for acting the fool.
Carter made his way slowly back from Islynn’s cottage. He needed time to think about what she told him. He believed her when she said she wasn’t reading his mind, just his body language, but what troubled him was that she had seen Fionn’s death.
The oddest part of their conversation was Islynn telling him she had lost her own soulmate repeatedly. It almost sounded like Islynn had known her lover in past lives, but that was silly. Reincarnation didn’t exist, did it?
Up until a few weeks ago he would have also said time-travel was only possible on television and in the movies and he’d been dead wrong. Maybe reincarnation was possible, but he didn’t want to wait for his next life to find happiness with Fionn.
He was more determined than ever to learn how to wield a sword. Where he had once been a pacifist, opposed to violence unless he was protecting himself, he would not hesitate to kill anyone who tried to harm Fionn. He was willing to die for Fionn. He just hoped Fionn would live for him.
“Ah, there you are, foundling Carter,” Fianna greeted warmly when he entered the great hall.
“Were you looking for me?” If she were, it might explain the mysterious smile curving her lips.
“No, but my brother was. It seems you have him on the run.” Her smile was dazzling, almost blinding.
Carter nodded. It looked like Fionn was just as anxious to make up as he was. “I’ll go find him.” He walked slowly to the stairs, not wanting Fionn’s sister to see how eager he was for their reunion.
“I would start in your bed chamber,” she called after him with a musical laugh.
Carter paused outside his chamber door. Was Fionn really waiting for him? There was only one way to find out. He took a deep breath and opened the door.
“Thank the gods, my heart. You have returned.” Fionn bounced up from the bed and pulled Carter into a tight hug.
Carter could barely breathe. He was being squeezed so tight it hurt to draw breath, but he wasn’t about to tell Fionn to stop. He was just so damned glad to be back in his arms.
“I could not find you anywhere and I…” Fionn trailed off. He reached for Carter’s face, looking for signs of injury.
Carter could see the residual fear lingering in his deep blue eyes. “I went for a walk to clear my head.” His heart squeezed tight in his chest. He hated lying, but it was a necessary evil, if Islynn was to be believed.
“I acted the fool earlier,” he said quietly.
“Me too.” Carter laughed at the shocked look on his lover’s face. “The last thing I am is ashamed of what we have together. I wasn’t sure how you would feel about me kissing you in front of your men, so I pulled away.”
“Then I compounded the problem by throwing a tantrum,” Fionn said, matter-of-factly.
Carter stood on tiptoe and kissed Fionn the way he had wanted to kiss him on the practice field. He sank his hands into Fionn’s mass of silky blond hair. “I’m sorry I didn’t kiss you, stubborn warr
ior.” Carter grinned.
“I am equally sorry I did not kiss you, princess.” He dropped a line of soft kisses against Carter’s neck. “I will make up for it by kissing you until the sun wakes from her slumber.”
“Less talking, more kissing,” Carter urged.
Fionn slipped his hands under Carter’s tunic, gliding them up the soft, warm skin of his back before he pushed the material up his body and over his head. “So beautiful, princess,” he murmured admiring Carter’s bare chest.
“Take your shirt off,” Carter ordered and sank to his knees in front of Fionn. His shaking hands untied Fionn’s breaches and started to pull them down when a strangled moan from above stopped him.