Even in this “quickie-style” situation, he felt so much more than just sexual energy flowing between them. With every thrust, he felt like it was more than just his physical body connecting with her. It was like his soul was being injected into hers.
He’d never felt anything like this before. This was special, what he felt for Ali. And he was more than ready to put in whatever work was necessary to make things right between them, so they could move forward together. Now that he’d tasted her, kissed her, been inside of her, he couldn’t go back to what they were before.
Keeping one hand fixed hard on her hips, he slid the other farther up her body. The heat of her soft skin felt amazing under his rough palms. So did the way her muscles shook and trembled under his touch.
“Yes, yes, yes,” she whispered as her nails dug into his shoulders as she anchored her grip there.
When her inner walls finally clenched, bearing down so hard on his cock that he could hardly thrust into her anymore, her entire body began to shake with release. Then he let himself go and emptied into her as she also exploded in an earth-shattering orgasm. Every muscle in his body contracted as they reached that all-powerful climax. He wrapped his arms around her tight, not wanting to ever let her go.
It was such a contrast for him. As everything simultaneously became blurry and twisted, they also became perfectly clear. He knew with more certainty than ever that Ali was his one and only. At the same time was confused about the steps he’d have to take to make sure they ended up together. He knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he was exactly where he was supposed to be but was confused about how much longer he’d be able to stay in the limbo of the uneasy balance he had with Ali.
His final conscious thought before he spun out into oblivion was that he wasn’t sure if he’d done enough, used his actions to let her know once and for all how he truly felt. He could only hope that if he hadn’t, he’d get another shot. And another. And another.
CHAPTER 18
Ali had been doing her best to keep her anxiety under control but it kept finding ways to raise its ugly head. That morning she’d brushed her teeth so hard her gums bled. Yesterday, she’d caught herself talking to herself when she wasn’t even alone. Last night, she’d spent twenty minutes in the frozen food section of the grocery store deciding what kind of ice cream to get, only to realize she’d already put a carton of Mint Chocolate Chip in her cart. Tonight, she couldn’t get her foot to stop tapping on the wood flooring as she pulled out her double pointed needles from her knitting bag.
Her current WIP was beanies that she planned on selling at the rental shop. She grabbed her multicolor yarn. Her heel bounced in time to the click, click, click of needles scraping together from the women who were already working on their projects. She settled her yarn on her lap and started knitting. Conversation flowed around her but it just sounded like white noise, all she heard was the click, click, click.
There was a full house in the community room at the rec center, but the one knitter Ali wanted to see was not there. For as long as she’d known her, Jess had been perpetually fifteen minutes late to everything. Ali normally didn’t mind but today, she was going crazy. Today she had big news to share.
Two days had passed since she and Kade had done the deed. Or deeds since they’d had several encore performances. It had been the best night of her life, hands down. There wasn’t even a close runner up. Kade was…magic. That’s what he was.
She’d never known that sex could be the way it was with him. And she wasn’t talking about the physical aspects. Although those had been mind-blowing. But the thing that had really shook her to her core, the thing that she couldn’t seem to stop thinking about, was how connected she’d felt to him.
Since picking up her first bodice ripper in the library when she was fourteen, she’d read a ton of romance novels. As much as she’d loved getting lost in the world of multiple orgasms and souls intertwining, she’d always thought that was just a fairytale. Just part of the fantasy but not attainable in the real world.
But she’d been wrong.
What she’d shared with Kade had been otherworldly. Surreal. Spiritual. Out of body. All that and there’d been toe-curling orgasms to boot.
After their first time in the kitchen, Kade had carried her upstairs, drawn a bath for her, and given her a sponge bath making sure to keep her hand, knee, and foot dry as he washed her entire body. He also did things with the power sprayer that her body was still reeling from. She’d thought that was the end of their night, but she’d been wrong.
He’d dried her off and carried her to bed where he kissed her entire body, giving her another orgasm once again with his mouth and fingers. Then he’d made sweet, tender love to her until her limbs were noodles and she was exhausted. She fell asleep, in his arms, as he softly sang “In Case You Didn’t Know” one of her favorite country songs to her.
When she woke, her first conscious thought was that the entire thing must’ve been a dream. But it was real, and it felt so amazing to wake up cocooned in his strong arms.
They weren’t awake long before she felt Kade’s erection pressed against her backside and his hands knead her breasts. He’d lifted her leg, resting it on his as he entered her from behind. His new angle had him hitting spots in her body she didn’t even know existed.
Their romantic morning was suddenly cut short in the middle of breakfast when the boys had popped in before school because KJ had forgotten his gym shorts. Suddenly, reality set in and the bubble that she’d been floating in burst. The twins hadn’t walked in on anything salacious, but they could have.
She was reminded then that her life was no longer her own. Starting a relationship with Kade did not just affect the two of them. It affected KJ and Ricky as well. Kade said that he wanted more, but how could she trust that? He’d been gone longer than he’d been back. And what if he did stay? There was no guarantee this would work out. He was a part of their lives, their other legal guardian. Was it worth the risk?
She couldn’t put the boys through that. They’d already been through so much. Maybe someday she’d be able to have a relationship, but not now. Not with Kade.
Ali heard a spattering of clapping and looked up to see Jess entering. She waved as she weaved her way through her adoring crowd. The over-seventy set loved Jess. She was their hair stylist rockstar.
A grin spread on her face as she saw her friend’s shirt read “Knit Me Baby One More Time.” Last meeting it was a “Knit Happens” T-shirt. The one before that had been a shirt that had two balls of yarn sitting on her tatas with the phrase “Knits Out” beneath them. Ali had a suspicion that the only reason her friend had agreed to join her in the Needlepoint Mafia was so she could wear punny shirts.
“Sorry, I’m late.” Jess moved Ali’s bag from the seat beside her. “I forgot to set a reminder on my phone and was home eating leftovers when I remembered.”
Ali was bursting at the seams to gossip with her friend, but she waited for Jess to get situated. Some knitting clubs might be lax about people sitting around chatting while their hands were idle, but this one wasn’t one of them.
After she cast on, Jess glanced over at her.
“Is everything okay,” she whispered.
“Yeah.” Ali nodded.
Her friend’s brow peaked. “Do you want to start with your date with Coach Karate the other night or how you broke your leg?”
Small town gossip at work.
“It wasn’t really a date,” Ali countered.
“Well, your leg doesn’t really look broken, but—,” Jess nodded toward Ali’s wrapped ankle, “the rumors do seem to have some merit.”
Ali was so excited to finally get to talk about the past forty-eight hours to her friend she was practically bouncing in her seat, but she made sure to continue her purling as she spoke in a voice so quiet it would make a church mouse seem like David Lee Roth. “I thought I was going to a meeting. But it turns out you were right.”
“Of cours
e I was.” Jess agreed before asking, “About what?”
“About Keaton.” Ali checked and saw that Mrs. D and the other “dons” were still seated on their thrones. The boss lady trio all had chairs that sat several inches higher than everyone else’s. Every club meeting the women would sit, reigning down on everyone, for the first thirty minutes or so, before walking around and mingling, which mainly consisted of pointing out what people were doing wrong. Ali looked back at Jess and tilted her head in the older ladies’ direction. “Mrs. D told me we were going to discuss the budget for the upcoming season. So I show up, and Keaton is there. He was told the same thing but Mrs. D is nowhere to be found. After twenty minutes she ends up cancelling on us and I realized it was a setup.”
“Holy shit! I knew it,” Jess said just a tad too loud.
They both looked up to see if they’d caught anyone’s attention. Thankfully, no one seemed to notice them.
“So, I was going to leave, but he stopped me and said he’d been wanting to ask me out for a while.”
“Holy shit! I knew it!” she repeated. This time at a volume that caught a few people’s attention and garnered some dirty looks.
Knitting club wasn’t like the library where the only sin greater than talking was to dog ear the books, but Jess’s colorful language was not appreciated.
“So you stayed?” Jess lowered her voice but not before sticking out her tongue in the direction of the dirty look givers when they went back to their knitting.
Ali smiled. She truly did have the best best-friend in the whole world. “Yes. I stayed. And it was…nice.”
Jess’s nose scrunched up. “Tea is nice. Someone letting you go ahead of them in line is nice. Putting on a warm pair of socks just out of the dryer is nice. First dates are supposed to be more than nice.”
“I know. And there was a first that was more than nice later. After Keaton dropped me off at home.”
Jess’s eyes widened as she mouthed, “Kade.”
Ali nodded.
“Holy shit!” She was still speaking with the volume off as she mouthed, “I knew it!”
Leaning even closer to her friend Ali breathed out the details of her night making sure to keep an eye out to pick up if anyone was eavesdropping. Most of the ladies had hearing aids, but when they turned those suckers up they had sonar hearing. “I did fall in front of the restaurant, but I didn’t break my leg. I scraped up my hand and knee and sprained my ankle. When I got home Kade met me at the door, picked me up, and carried me to the kitchen. Then, he cleaned my cuts and wrapped my ankle.” Ali paused not sure how much she wanted to share.
Jess elbowed her.
“Ow.” Ali grabbed her side.
“And?” her friend prompted.
She smiled. “Then he kissed my hand and…made everything feel better.”
Jess was shaking her head as she stared at her friend. “Damn, you got the McHoly Trifecta. McKnight-in-Shining-Armor sweeping you off your feet, McDreamy dressing your wounds, and McSteamy laying it down.”
Ali couldn’t help but giggle at Jess’s description of the night’s events. But she stopped when she felt someone approaching them. She looked up and saw Mrs. D heading their way.
A small bit of panic stirred in Ali’s chest. She’d tried to come up with what she was going to say when Mrs. D asked her about the night, but every time she’d think about it her mind would drift to Kade. It was a pattern that seemed to keep repeating itself.
Jess must have sixth-sensed her dilemma because with her smile remaining in place she spoke without moving her lips. “Okay, just tell her you had a nice time with Keaton but you’re not interested because of KJ.”
“Hello, ladies. How are things going over here?” Mrs. D eyed their work.
“Good.” Ali smiled.
“Hunky dory.” Jess gave her a thumbs up.
“So, Miss Walsh. Do you have my report?”
“Well, we had a nice time and I think Keaton is a great guy, but I don’t feel comfortable dating him since KJ is his student.” Done. That was easy.
“Okay,” Mrs. D shrugged. “What does that have to do with the report you owe me?”
“Um…I…” Ali wasn’t sure what to say. Her eyes darted to Jess for help but her friend looked just as confused as she was. “I thought that was what you wanted me to report back on.”
Mrs. D’s head shook back and forth in tiny, rapid movements. “Why would who you want to date, or not date, have anything to do with the budget?”
“I thought that…”
“She thought it was a setup.” Jess came to her rescue. “You know, like when you sent Pete Mulligan on a wild goose chase across the state with Kelly Lindstrom looking for the deed to City Hall. Or when Mrs. Chen told Patricia Jones that Gary Foley was stranded in the cabin up on Foster Hill and then had someone chop down a tree on her property that happened to block the only road down from the property for two days.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Mrs. D stood up taller.
“Oh, I can keep going.” Jess took a deep breath.
Mrs. D lifted her hand. “No need. Even if any of that was true, what gave you the idea that this situation was similar?”
Ali was starting to get a sneaking suspicion that it hadn’t been a setup at all. “Well, you called a meeting on a Sunday night.”
“It’s the only night I had free before spring break and I knew that you’d be swamped after the tourists started showing up.”
“But it was at Santino’s.”
“They have the best breadsticks in the state.”
“At seven o’clock.”
“Mason doesn’t start playing until seven. He has the voice of an angel.”
“You told Keaton to look spiffy and me to wear my Sunday best.”
She waved her hand in the air dismissively. “Well, yes. I was afraid you’d show up in those cutoff shorts you’re so fond of, and I didn’t want him walking in in his pajamas and embarrassing me. It’s a classy restaurant.”
“His pajamas?” Ali repeated.
“His gi,” Jess interpreted.
“Okay, but you never showed up.” Feeling like she was grasping at straws, Ali continued to lay out her evidence. “You had us meet there, all dressed up, and you never came.”
“Oh… Well, if you must know,” a blush crept up Mrs. D’s cheeks as she leaned forward and whispered, “Mr. Dobrinski got a hold of one of those special blue pills and they last quite a bit longer than we’d anticipated.”
Ali felt her mouth flop open like a bass fish.
Jess didn’t miss a beat, lifting her hand to the woman and giving her a high five she said, “You get yours, Mrs. D.”
“Oh, I did, Miss Myers. I did, indeed.”
“So it really wasn’t a setup?” Ali asked, completely thrown.
“Afraid not, dear.”
Jess lifted her hook and pointed it in an accusatory fashion toward the woman that they all knew was getting hers. Her friend’s eyes narrowed as she tipped Mrs. D off to her undercover work. “Last week I saw you ladies Googling Keaton. And you gave him a code name.”
“We have code names just like you and your girlfriends do.” She shot a knowing look at Ali. “And have you looked at Keaton Mills? He’s easy on the eyes.”
Jess and Ali both sat, speechless. Neither had any more points to bring up. They’d all been decidedly disproven.
“Besides dear, do you really think we’d discuss something of such a sensitive nature in a public place when anyone could overhear?” Mrs. D looked between them with an expression that caused Ali to wonder just how long the range was on her hearing aid. “Miss Walsh, I expect to have some numbers for the summer festivities by our next meeting.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Ali agreed.
As soon as Mrs. D was out of hearing distance, Jess breathed, “Holy shit.”
“I guess you didn’t know,” Ali finished.
“Wait, you know what that means?” Jess grabbed Ali’s fo
rearm.
“I can honestly say that I have no idea.”
“If Keaton’s not their next project, then someone else is.”
“Okay…”
They looked at each other and Jess mouthed, “Kade?”
Ali’s stomach sank.
The Needlepoint Mafiosas loved him and he certainly fit the criteria.
She knew she couldn’t be with him, but that didn’t mean she wanted him to be with anyone else. And that was a problem.
CHAPTER 19
Kade let out a breath as he stood over Patrick’s headstone. He lowered down and traced the engraving as tears threatened the back of his eyes. It still didn’t seem real to him that Patrick was gone.
He rested back on his heels and he looked out over the rest of the cemetery. Patrick had good real estate up here. His plot was on a small hill nestled under a tree that provided ample shade for visitors and he was laid to rest beside his grandfather and mother. As he stared down at his name etched into the stone he wanted to scream that God got the wrong man. He should be the one six feet under, not Patrick.
Patrick was good. Truly good. He had a family and people that loved him. People that depended on him. Patrick never hurt anyone. Patrick should be the one visiting Kade here, not the other way around.
“Well, P Daddy,” Kade began using the nickname that had started out as P Diddy when they were teenagers but morphed to P Daddy after the twins were born. “Sorry, I haven’t come by to see you sooner. I’ve been trying to get my shit together and it’s not as easy as you made it look.” Kade’s voice cracked, and he paused until he had control over the emotions that were fighting their way to the surface.
He cleared his throat and pushed through. “I…um…didn’t take the news that you were gone well. I don’t know if ghosts are real, but if you happened to stop by your own funeral then you already know that.” Kade sighed, “I’m sorry about that. I should’ve been honoring your memory and instead I was being a belligerent asshole.
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