“Will you come in, if I have a bad dream?” Emma asked her, and Angélique promised she would, and kissed her goodnight. She left their doors open when they asked her to, and went to relax in the nursery parlor with a book. She was surprised by how well the day had gone, and they were sweet children despite their exuberance. She was thinking about how easy it had been, and the visit to their parents, when Sarah knocked softly and walked in.
“All finished? How did it go today?” She was happy to see her new friend, and sat down in one of the comfortable chairs across from her.
“Pretty well. We went down to the library for tea. She’s very beautiful,” she observed about their employer, and Sarah nodded.
“She’s cold as ice and only thinks of herself,” Sarah commented. “I think Mr. Ferguson is a very handsome man,” she added, grinning. “He could have found a nicer one, but I think he’s impressed that her father had a title. It doesn’t do him much good, and she costs him a fortune. You should see the gowns Stella brings to the laundry to press and mend. She buys them in Paris. Wouldn’t I love to wear a dress like that one day!” She changed the subject then. “They were all talking about you at supper tonight, downstairs. It’s a shame you can’t dine with us when the children are asleep. Maybe Helen would watch them for you one night, at least so you could join us for pudding and a cup of tea.”
“I wish I could,” Angélique said longingly. She was going to get lonely in the nursery with only Helen for adult company. They hadn’t warmed up to each other yet, and Angélique wasn’t sure they would. She had liked the bustling around the servants’ dining room and kitchen. It reminded her of the kitchen at Belgrave and the staff there. It made her homesick, thinking about them, and she wondered how Hobson and Mrs. White, Mrs. Williams, and all the others were. She promised herself to write to Mrs. White the next day, to let her know how she was, and what she was doing in her job.
The two young women sat and talked for half an hour, and then Sarah got up and went to bed, and after reading for a little while, Angélique did the same. Bridget had warned her that the baby woke up every morning before six, and it would be a short night if she didn’t get to bed soon. But it was nice to enjoy the peace in the nursery parlor at night. It gave her a respite from chasing the children all day. They were better behaved than she’d expected, and than the people downstairs had said. They were just children, and there were a lot of them. It made them seem worse than they really were.
—
The next day was sunny and cold, and Angélique explored the grounds with the children after breakfast. They ran in the garden, and she peeked into the maze but didn’t risk it, in case she couldn’t find her way out and got separated from the children. It was a beautiful park, as they strolled with the baby in the pram, and the children’s cheeks were bright red from the cold when they came back through the kitchen. Everyone exclaimed over them, paying special attention to Emma, and the cook gave each of them a biscuit. The smells in the kitchen were delicious. The kitchen staff were preparing dinner, and they were baking several cakes to serve that night at supper. Their guests were leaving the next day, much to the staff’s relief. Their hunting parties where the guests stayed for three or four days were a lot of work. Three of the female guests had brought their own maids; the others relied on the housemaids to dress them. But visiting staff were more work for the house staff too, and more mouths to feed. And one of Harry’s close friends had brought his valet, who was very grand with the others, and had managed to annoy them all with his supercilious manner.
Angélique noticed the head butler, Mr. Gilhooley, staring at her, as they lingered in the kitchen for a few minutes, and then she ushered the children upstairs. She saw that the butler was still watching her when they left, although she couldn’t imagine why. He looked fierce and unfriendly, but she knew that Hobson could look that way too, at Belgrave, when he wanted to impress the younger staff. But the Fergusons’ butler seemed particularly unfriendly to her. It made her almost glad she couldn’t eat downstairs, if he was going to glare at her. And the Fergusons’ housekeeper, Mrs. Allbright, wasn’t nearly as warm as Mrs. White. But Angélique also realized that she had never worked for her. And even among the staff at Belgrave, a new face in the crowd was always kept at a distance at first, until the staff got to know them. She was the new girl among the servants now. The whole idea of it was so absurd she almost laughed. She wondered what her father would say to see her there, in her uniform, other than to express his fury at Tristan, which Angélique could only imagine. She hoped he’d be proud of her, for dealing with it as gracefully as possible. And she knew for certain that what Tristan had done to her would have broken her father’s heart.
The children had their naps, after the meal the cook sent up, and leaving Helen to listen for the children, she went back down to the kitchen for a cup of tea. As she walked by, she saw Mr. Gilhooley in his office, and he beckoned her to come in.
“Are you finding the nursery to your satisfaction?” he asked her formally. But he sounded as though he really cared, and then he lowered his voice conspiratorially, so no one would hear them. “Your Ladyship, I wanted you to know…I used to work for your father a long time ago, at Belgrave, and I wanted to tell you how sorry I am about your loss. He was a great man.”
“Yes, he was,” Angélique said sadly. “I miss him terribly. It only just happened.”
“I don’t know how it is that you came here, Your Ladyship,” he said, as she cringed at how he had addressed her. It was precisely what she didn’t want the staff here to know about her, that she had been born into the cream of aristocratic society, and had a title. She didn’t want anything to set her apart from the others. If she had to live and work here, she wanted to be one of them, no matter how unlikely her presence there seemed. It still seemed improbable to her too, but at least she had met a few members of the staff, and she was touched by what the butler had said about her father.
“I think it would be best if you don’t address me that way, Mr. Gilhooley. It will only make things more difficult for me with the others. They might even decide they don’t like me for that reason alone. They needn’t know who my father was—in fact, they shouldn’t. That’s all in the past now,” she said seriously.
“Clearly there are reasons why you are here, and it must be very hard for you,” he said, looking sympathetic and no longer fierce.
“Nothing surprises me anymore,” she said honestly. “But now that I’m here, it’s better than I thought. Everyone has been very kind to me.”
“I’m happy to hear it. If there’s anything I can do…” His eyes searched hers, and she shook her head. She didn’t want to be singled out for special treatment. She had to get by, and do her job, like the others. She expected no favors from him, and he respected her for it. She was very young to be experiencing such a change. “Do the Fergusons know?” He was curious how she had come there.
Angélique shook her head. “No, they don’t. My brother secured the position for me, and I believe he told them that we’re cousins. It’s probably best that way. Please don’t tell anyone, Mr. Gilhooley.” Her eyes pleaded with him and touched his heart.
“Certainly not, if that is your wish. I’m sure it would be a shock for the Fergusons too, to realize that they have the daughter of a duke under their roof, working in the nursery.” But he suspected they’d like it.
“It doesn’t make any difference now,” she said, fighting back tears that threatened to overwhelm her. “My brother and his wife and daughters are at Belgrave. There is no place for me there.” The butler looked tragic as he listened, and he suspected some foul play at work, particularly if the new duke was passing her off as his cousin and not his sister. But there was no way the duke could have explained to anyone that he had sent her away to become a nanny without looking like a cad. It was crystal clear now to Gilhooley.
“Life works in mysterious ways, Your Ladyship,” he said softly. “I am certain you will go home again o
ne day.”
She nodded and couldn’t speak as he patted her hand. At least she had a friend here, other than Sarah, and she was sure that Hobson at Belgrave would be pleased that a butler of the late duke had taken her under his wing and would protect her. And it was comforting for her that Gilhooley would be watching out for her. She stood up then—she had been away from the nursery longer than she’d planned.
“I should go back,” she said quietly, and thanked him with a grateful look.
“Come and join us another time,” he invited her, as she smiled at him.
“I will,” she assured him, “although the children will keep me busy.” He laughed at that.
“I’m certain they will, Your Ladyship. And I hope you’ll be happy here and stay for a long time.” Although what he really wished for her was that she would go home to Belgrave Castle where she belonged. He considered it nearly criminal for her brother to have sent her away to become a servant in someone’s home. It had shocked him profoundly on her behalf. And a moment later Angélique hurried back upstairs to the nursery where Helen was waiting impatiently for her.
“What took you so long?” Helen was annoyed when she got there.
“I’m sorry. Mr. Gilhooley wanted to speak to me, and I couldn’t get away.”
“What did he want?” she asked suspiciously.
“As it turns out, he knew my father,” she said, and then regretted it.
“Was your father a butler too? Or a footman?”
“No,” Angélique said quietly, not sure what to say to her, “he wasn’t. They just knew each other.” And with that, the baby stirred, and Angélique went to get him, and the others woke up shortly after. They played games that afternoon, and took Simon to ride on his pony. His father walked past the stables while he did, and waved at him, but he didn’t stop to speak to the children. He was going to ride himself, and it didn’t even occur to him to visit with them. Eugenia was resting, and he wanted to get some air. And by the time he came back late that afternoon, the children were back in the house, being bathed by their nanny.
—
Life went on peacefully after that, as Angélique got accustomed to the children. Caring for four of them was something of a juggling act, but she was surprised to find she enjoyed it and felt useful, and it made the time pass quickly. They needed someone to care for them, and make life interesting. She started to teach them French, and was impressed to find that Emma picked it up easily, and Simon was learning too, although more slowly. And by the time she’d been there a month, they had made serious progress, and had learned many words and several songs in French. It was nearly Christmas by then, and the Fergusons had been in London all month going to parties, while their children waited for them in Hampshire. Their parents finally returned the day before Christmas Eve. An enormous Christmas tree had been put up in the main hall, and the children had helped decorate it, and were thrilled with the end result.
And when it had snowed hard the week before, Angélique had made a snowman with them. She was full of ideas to entertain them, and was barely more than a child herself. But she had grown up fast in the last month. Working and living in someone else’s home, taking care of their children, and having to get along with the staff had matured her as nothing ever had before. And when the Fergusons saw the children on Christmas morning to give them their presents, before a party they were giving, they had important news to share with them. They were going to have a new brother or sister in a few months, which came as startling news to Angélique too. When the new baby came, sometime in May, her employer told her in further detail, there would be a baby nurse for a month, and then Angélique would be taking care of five children instead of four, for a few months at least, until Simon left for Eton at the end of the summer. Mrs. Ferguson made it perfectly clear to her that she thought a second nanny unnecessary, since Simon would be going away so soon, and she said that Angélique managed so well with four. She had absolutely no idea what that entailed, nor did she want to know, since she had never spent more than a few minutes with her children at any time. She told Angélique that she was doing a splendid job of it, handed her a small Christmas gift, and then they were dismissed as guests started arriving. The children retreated to the nursery, where Eugenia said they belonged, and her husband agreed.
Once back in the nursery, Angélique helped them open their gifts. Simon received a game he wanted to play with her, Rupert a stuffed bear he carried around everywhere, Emma a new doll, and Charles a silver rattle, which he shoved into his mouth immediately. They were very pleased with their presents, and watched as Angélique opened hers. She had received a pair of gloves, which would be useful on their walks. They were gray leather to match her uniform, and looked very smart. They were a perfect fit when Emma made her try them on. Mrs. Ferguson had guessed well.
In January, the Fergusons decided exceptionally to take the children to London with them for two weeks, and Angélique was excited about it. There would be so much to do with the children there. They set out on a freezing-cold day, with the children, Helen, and Angélique traveling in the family’s large coach, and Mrs. Ferguson in the barouche-landau, similar to Angélique’s brother’s, while Mr. Ferguson rode in his luxurious chariot. A carriage followed behind with their luggage. Simon was thrilled to be riding in the coach, and loved watching the horses, but Emma said she felt sick most of the way. The two little ones slept for several hours with the gentle rocking motion, with Angélique holding Charles in her arms. And when they got to London, the staff were happy to see them, and equally so to meet Angélique and show her around the house.
The Fergusons’ London home was an enormous house on Curzon Street, filled with beautiful furniture and art, and they either entertained at home or went to parties every night. It was easy to see now why Eugenia found Hampshire boring. She had an enviable life in the city, surrounded by friends, evenings at the theater, the opera, and the ballet. And Harry seemed happy there too. He did business in the City, and went to his club frequently to meet his cronies to dine or gamble. They stayed out late every night.
One Sunday afternoon they had guests in for tea, and Angélique was asked to bring the children down at teatime, just as they did in the country. She dressed them in their finest clothes, two maids helped her, and when they arrived in the drawing room, Angélique got a shock. She found herself standing a few feet away from Tristan and Elizabeth, who looked right through her as though they didn’t know her. She had been about to say hello to them, which was awkward enough, when Tristan walked away, and Elizabeth turned her back on her to talk to a woman she knew. And Angélique was sure they had seen her, although their faces revealed nothing.
It was Eugenia who finally pointed her out to them, in a most embarrassing way.
“Did you not recognize your cousin in her nurse’s uniform?” she asked Tristan blandly. “And you were quite right about her—she’s a wonderful nanny. She has Simon and Emma speaking French.” Tristan feigned surprise then, and acknowledged his sister with a cool greeting, as though to give the impression that he barely knew her. His Grace, the Duke of Westerfield, was clearly not pleased to be associated with a nanny, who had been identified as his cousin.
“Indeed,” he said in an icy tone, “I didn’t see her.” He nodded in Angélique’s direction, and Elizabeth said nothing and just glared at her with hatred in her eyes. They clearly wanted her out of their lives forever. They had assumed she was in Hampshire when they accepted the Fergusons’ invitation. Otherwise they might not have come. And Tristan didn’t look in the least embarrassed to have claimed she was his cousin, rather than his sister. “Very distant cousin, I might add,” he said to Eugenia. “I’m sure you’ve been very kind to her.” He nodded at Angélique again then and walked away, and a few minutes later her mistress said she should take the children upstairs—they had been there long enough. The nearly fifteen minutes had given Angélique a chance to observe her brother and his wife.
Elizabeth was wearing
a beautiful dress, although Eugenia was wearing a nicer one. And there was no sign of Tristan’s daughters, who were really too young to be at a party for adults. She heard Elizabeth say that Gwyneth would be coming out in July, and presented at court at the same time. It was the Season Angélique had never had, nor wanted, and would never have now. All chance of meeting a husband from her own world had vanished when Tristan refused her his protection and sent her away. And he was relieved when she left the room and went back upstairs. He hoped not to see her again. It had been an unpleasant surprise for Elizabeth as well, who was pale and silent as Angélique walked by her.
Angélique was shaken by the experience, and upset when they got back to the nursery. She had wondered for the past two months if her brother had regretted what he’d done, or ever would. She had her answer now. He not only denied her as a sister, but he clearly wanted nothing to do with her. She was sure he would have been relieved if she died. It was a terrible feeling, and a shiver ran up her spine remembering his eyes when he had first seen her and pretended not to. She had ceased to exist for them. She was nothing more than a ghost from their past, and in their minds she was as dead as her father. It confirmed to her what she had feared since she left, that she would never see her home again. The first eighteen years of her life were nothing but memories now. He had reminded her of her worst fear that night. She was totally alone in the world.
Chapter 5
The Fergusons decided to stay in London until February, and make the best of the time to enjoy the social whirl before Eugenia’s confinement, and the baby’s birth in May. And most unusually, they kept the children in town with them, which Angélique enjoyed more than she’d expected.
The Duchess Page 7