They came storming in split seconds after the violently loud explosion rocked the cave. Still reeling, I rushed into the leader of the two and surprised him with my movement. I drove my shoulder into his solar plexus with a tackle that threw him backwards. I followed him to the ground and was promptly flipped over into the wall of the cave. He reached for his ankle knife to pincushion me, and my hands frantically searched the cave floor for anything that could be used as a weapon. They found a stone the size of my fist. I swung it in an arc toward his face with all the force that I could muster. His jaw shattered like glass.
I rolled the incapacitated soldier to the side and heard one of my ribs pop from the second soldier’s boot slamming into my chest. I writhed and gasped for air, and he lowered his rifle and trained it on my chest. I saw his finger tighten, so I whipped the rock out of my hand as hard as I could and it hit him on the shoulder. It knocked the shot off of its trajectory, causing the bullet to graze my bicep rather than puncture my lungs.
Without thinking, I scooped up the first soldier’s knife from where it had fallen and dove forward. I thrust it into the front of his thigh and pulled it down with me as we both came crashing to the ground. I quickly retracted the knife and brought it down again and again.
As I regained my senses, I tried to fight back the bile in my mouth as I looked upon the mangled bodies of the attackers. I lost the fight, and my stomach emptied itself of the little it had left in it. The others I’d killed seemed impersonal—I hadn’t had time to think about taking their lives—but as I recalled the bodies on the cave floor, the full weight of the lives I’d taken, and what had been done to me, hit like a car. I fell to my knees and dry heaved, praying that there were no more patrols on the way.
* * *
I was still weak from shock when I summoned my energy and climbed to the mouth of the cave a few minutes later, ignoring the pain screaming through my large collection of wounds. Soon I made it to the surface, and this time I disregarded my safety. I just stumbled forward as fast as my body would allow.
The thought that I’d be found regardless of how good my hiding spot was and the blood that oozed from my arm were more than enough incentive for me to keep moving despite the pain as I stumbled through the canyon with the grace of a drunken zombie. The hours blurred into each other.
I wandered through the desert wilderness for another full day. The hours were agonizing, and the only liquids I drank were from a saguaro cactus that I’d found. I wanted to give up and die. Everything hurt, and I was dehydrated and becoming delusional; my vision danced, and I started seeing things that weren't there. My bullet wounds had started to bleed again, and I had nothing to stop the red stains as blood soaked through the makeshift bandages that I’d made. The blood loss made me lightheaded, so I grabbed a handful of sand and jammed it in the gashes. I let out a wail of agony and collapsed in pain as darkness took me.
11
I didn’t awake with a start; it was more of a casual easing into awareness. First everything was nebulous, as if I were watching the world through frosted windows. Gradually everything clarified, and I started to panic as I found myself surrounded by medical curtains and white walls.
Where am I? What is this place? How did I get here? I anxiously thought as I examined my surroundings, finding medical equipment everywhere I looked.
“No! You saw him! You saw what they did to him! Those monsters deserve to die, but you won’t drag Stephen back into this!” I heard a familiar voice shouting. Sasha seethed in anger.
“I saw what they did! That’s why we have to stop them!” Helena growled back. “He’s the only one who has the information to stop them!”
“Ladies, let’s let this lie for now. It’s been two days, and Stephen has yet to wake up,” Arthur chimed in from behind the curtain.
The argument continued in whispers, and I found myself losing focus as weariness overtook me. After what seemed like mere seconds of dreamless sleep, I once again awoke and looked over to find Sasha sleeping in a chair at my bedside.
“It’s great to see you again,” I said. A feeble smile played on my lips. I still felt burned by her betrayal, but I felt relieved at sight of her face. I wasn’t sure if I had been dreaming or not when I’d overheard their argument.
“You’re awake! I never thought you’d wake up again. You had me so worried. If you ever get yourself kidnapped and torn to pieces again, I’ll kill you myself!” Tears started flowing down Sasha’s crimson cheeks. “Hey, Arthur! Helena! Get in here! Stephen’s awake!” she shouted as she stood up and flung the curtains open. “We’ve been here since our people found you two and a half days ago. Everyone’s here. I’m so sorry for what happened to you,” Sasha babbled with her back to me. She startled me by turning around and flinging her arms around me. “I was so scared for you!”
“It’s good to see you awake and well enough, regarding the circumstances. You’ll have to fill me in on what happened, young man. You’ve not had an easy time, or so it seems, from all these bruises and new scars I see,” Arthur spoke at the same time as Helena.
“Stephen, I’m glad you’re back in the land of the living. Once you feel better we’ll need to have a debriefing.”
“Thanks, guys, but could you please slow down and say that again? I’m not asleep so it’s not quite as easy to get all the information that just came tumbling out of your mouths,” I said, resentment leaking from my voice. This gave them pause, and, after a stifling silence, I continued. “Yes, I figured it out. You’ve been using me as a spy. And yes, I’m pretty pissed about it, but it saved my life, and your training made my escape possible. I really wish I could hate you guys, but I understand why you lied to me. Just don’t expect me to trust you anytime soon.”
“I am truly sorry for not letting you know what we were doing with you, Stephen. But please know that I do treasure your friendship, although I’ll understand if you don’t want to continue it,” Arthur calmly voiced.
“I’ll get back to you on that.”
Sasha started apologizing and was halfway through before Helena interrupted. “You’re a smart man, Stephen. It’s part of why we chose you. You also know that the team cares about you, and we view you as a friend. But don’t forget that first and foremost, you’re our investment. You’re what pays the bills and keeps food on the tables for our families. I truly am sorry for what happened to you, but you’re too important of an asset for me to coddle. You can choose now if you’re with us or if you’ll leave us. But now you know how important the work we’ve been doing is, and you carry the marks of why we need you on your body. Now, I trust you’ll make the wise choice here.”
“You’re right, it’s important work, and if you haven’t heard any news of a new attack then we’ll be needing it again soon. But know this, after I tell you what you need to know we’re gonna have’ta have a long talk. But first I need to tell you what happened,” I said as I started to launch into the story of my capture and subsequent escape.
“I’m so, so sorry. If I’d have known that you’d be captured and tortured, I’d have told you everything. I didn’t know anyone else knew. I swear,” Sasha started to cry after hearing me recount my story. She reached for my hand to comfort me but I instinctively withdrew.
“I’m sorry,” I apologized, not really knowing why.
My mind drifted off; I found it easier to just shut down than to see the tears brimming in Sasha’s eyes and the pity in Arthur’s. They tried to treat me as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened, but every movement they made was underscored by how fragile I’d become. I wondered if this was what it felt like going through a divorce, knowing that deep cuts had been made but, like a hemophiliac, being unable to stem the flow of blood that slowly drained the life from the relationship.
“Are you ready to tell your story again now that everyone’s here?” Arthur asked after a long span of silence, during which the rest of the team had gathered.
“Sure. Now’s as good a time as any.”<
br />
After giving them time to get out their pads and computers to take notes, I once again launched into the tale of my abduction.
“You already know about how I was taken; I saw it covered in your briefing. So I’m gonna skip that part and go straight to the interrogations.” I then explained the details of my imprisonment and torture, pausing to explain when something of special interest popped up. About an hour later I had finished my tale. I looked into their eyes and mostly saw horror. It was actually better than the pity in Sasha’s and Arthur’s eyes.
You should be horrified. It was you pieces of crap who got me into that situation. I would never have even taken the job if I’d known what you were using me for, I lied to myself, knowing in the pit of my stomach that I wouldn’t have been able to resist the temptation to use my power had known what I possessed.
“I said, could you clarify what attack it was that they were mentioning?” a blue-eyed tech asked, snapping me out of my reverie.
“I don’t know. All that I know is that they were planning some sort of attack, and from the sounds of it, whatever it is, it’s probably going to happen soon.”
“I’m sorry to say this, but we’re going to need your help with this again,” Safid said.
“Yeah, I figured as much.”
“You’re truly a hero,” he responded.
The words sounded hollow.
“Just tell me what you need me to do,” I resigned myself to the path fate had chosen for me.
I had a long debriefing before I dove into the dream world. They told me of the MK-ULTRA program and how their research had grown out of it. I insisted that they give me every bit of information that they had about the program, and to my surprise they obliged me.
“Why are you being so accommodating?”
“You could just do a little digging and find the archivists and get whatever information you wanted from them. Telling you the truth is easier than dealing with what may happen if your curiosity isn’t sated,” Helena smoothed her slate-grey skirt.
“Yeah, I guess that would be a bad thing for you, wouldn’t it?”
“Both you and I know that you would do anything to stop people from being hurt.”
I hated that she was able to read me so easily.
“Are you ready?” Helena didn’t bother waiting for my response before stabbing the IV into me.
“Da—” I was asleep before the rest of the curse left my mouth.
12
“I’ve been waiting for you.”
Cold terror gripped me.
“Yes, I’ve been keeping my tabs on you ever since you so boldly made your escape.” Clayton seemed to read my mind. “Do you really think that I’d let you get away that easily?”
“But I escaped!”
“And you think that it was all on your own?” Condescension oozed like molasses.
“But what about your men? I killed them!”
He coldly smiled, and it dawned on me.
“You sacrificed their lives just so you could gain information.” My blood curdled. This man was a true psychopath.
“Every single one of my soldiers knows the price, and they are willing to pay it in order to join in our revolution.” His mad eyes gleamed. They looked devilish in our dream world.
“What do you want from me!” I screamed.
“Oh, you’ve given me everything I want. You've gift-wrapped it and dropped it into my lap,” he smiled. He reminded me of a mannequin, made in the image of a man but with no recognizable humanity.
I’ve gotta warn them! I desperately tried to wake myself up.
“It’s useless. With the chemicals they pumped into you, you won’t be waking for another couple of hours,” Clayton let out a wheezing laugh that sounded like his lungs were rattling around his ribcage.
I wanted to disappear, but his eyes dug into me like talons and wouldn’t let me go. It took all of my willpower to stand up to him. Every time I looked into his eyes I saw scenes of my torture reflected in them. He sensed it and fed upon my terror like an opiate.
“There’s nothing you can do to stop me. I’ve already won.”
“What have you won?” I prayed that his tongue would slip.
“Do you really think that I’m foolish enough to answer that?”
“You’ve already won, so why not tell me?”
“Your tenacity is admirable, but you’re a fool to think that you can weasel any information out of me.” He laughed like a hyena. “You have two choices, Stephen. You can join me or die. Which would you prefer?”
“Go to hell!”
My mind exploded in a fireball of pain. I fell to my knees and let out an agonized cry.
“Death it is,” he said with an air of finality.
No! This isn’t it. I’m not dying here!
“I said, go to hell!” a voice I barely recognized thundered from my chest. It burned my vocal chords.
Clayton unleashed his fury on me, but this time I was ready. I let the wave of agony wash over me and I stepped aside, redirecting it, like a martial artist diverting a blow. I took the energy from his attack and redirected it back at him. He slapped it aside as if it were nothing.
I mounted an attack of my own, my dream-self rushing in with a barrage of punches. I employed every technique I could remember, but he batted me aside as if I were a gnat. I picked myself up again and rushed in with another attack that was easily parried.
“There is no way you can win. Why even fight? Just accept your fate and die like the rest of them!”
“The rest of who?”
It was only a split second, but his composure broke. I saw in his eyes that he’d let far more slip than he’d meant to, so I pressed harder. “The rest of who?”
He went completely silent.
“THE REST OF WHO?” my voice shot like a cannon in our dream world. The force of it caused the general’s legs to buckle. He retaliated by sending a shock of pain through my body that left me disoriented.
This isn’t the real world. These are my dreams. I make the rules here, and he can’t hurt me, it dawned on me.
I stepped into his attack and let it flow around me. I was a boulder in a river, the water parting before me. “You have no power over me,” I whispered and unleashed all of the anger and pain that had been growing in me since the abduction. Clayton’s eyes rolled back and started bleeding. He let out an inhuman wail and blindly lashed out, energy crashing like waves on the shore of our dream world. “What are you planning?”
“No!” he mewled.
“Tell me!”
“There’s nothing you can do. You’re already dead, and you don’t even know it!” his laugh mixed with pained gasps.
“What are you planning?” His ears sprayed blood. “What are you planning?”
“Goodbye.” Clayton laughed, blood mixed with spittle as he smiled devilishly.
I crashed back into my body, waking up to a disorienting wall of noise. My vision swam, and my ears rang. I felt like I’d been thrown off a building.
“What happened?” I shouted, not hearing my voice over the ringing in my ears.
“We’re under attack!”
13
Confusion reigned as Helena and the rest of the team of ten that’d gathered scrambled at the sound of gunshots. The guards at the end of the hall were unceremoniously mowed down by semi-automatic fire. They dropped to the ground.
“Everybody find cover!” the shout was barely a whisper above the ringing in our ears.
The bursts of gunfire resounded closer and closer. Soon the battle had made it to our door, and, just as quickly as the first, our guards were ruthlessly shot down. The door was kicked open, and a small cylinder landed in the middle of the room.
“Get down!” I screamed. I scooped up the stun grenade and heaved it back into the hallway, where it detonated.
“Toss me that scalpel!” I could barely hear myself over the concussion that echoed through the hall.
I rushed out and repeated
ly drove the scalpel into the neck of the closest attacker. It severed his carotid artery and bathed me in blood. I followed him to the ground and used his body as a shield to protect me from the gunfire that whistled from down the corridor.
A bullet tore through my shoulder, and I howled in pain. I rolled and hurled the scalpel at the nearest soldier. My aim was wildly off, but it gave me just enough time to retrieve the dead terrorist’s sidearm and unload a partial clip into the man that’d shot me.
One of the techs, Bryson, who’d followed me out fell to the ground. His abdomen was stained red by the bullets that’d punctured him. I cursed and dragged his quickly fading body back into the once-sterile government hospital room.
“How many are out there?” I could barely hear Helena shout. My jaw ached, and my ears were still buzzing from the gunfire.
“I killed two, but I saw them training in teams of five while I was dream walking, so there's gotta be three more in the hallway, but he’s sure to’ve sent more than one team.”
“Give me that oxygen tank!” Helena shouted at a tech, who broke out of his daze and hurriedly retrieved it. After a brief explanation of her plan she told me, “I hope that you’re a good shot.”
Helena crept to the doorway and heaved the tank. It tumbled down the hall, and I sprayed the rest of the bullets, praying that they’d hit the oxygen tank. One did. The resulting blast knocked me back into the room and stole the breath from my lungs.
I looked around. Everything was moving in slow motion.
“Are…all right…how…happened…what…dead?” I could barely make out.
“What did you say?”
“A…you all right? Did the explosion k…the…of the team?” I read Helena’s lips.
Sleeper Agent Page 5