But I couldn’t trust him.
Whether I could trust Orion to honor his word any better, I didn’t know.
But I lay facedown on a table already hot from the sun and braced myself. His hands worked through my hair and then there was a pinch. “Probes,” he said quietly, his voice brisk, confident. “They’ll connect to the seal and relay my commands.”
A moment later, there was a slight pressure. “Local anesthetic. It only takes a few minutes, but this is painful without it.”
The numbness hit fast and I didn’t start to panic until the pressure started.
A hand touched my shoulder. My bare shoulder. He’d told me to strip off my tunic and I’d long since lost all sense of modesty. But the feel of anybody touching me was a harsh, startling shock. “Relax. This takes just a short time.”
I wasn’t worried about how long it took. If it freed me, it could take years. I was worried about whether or not he was going to kill me.
This is your best shot, I told myself, trying to calm down. My best shot, maybe my only—
Abruptly, I realized his thumb was stroking my skin. Closing my eyes, I tried not to think about that, tried to go back to the moment before I’d noticed.
He was speaking orders to his data-sys and I tried to block out the sound of his voice, the feel of his thumb, everything. The pressure at the base of my skull increased.
Then I knew darkness.
Chapter Ten
“You have to run.”
I stared up at Orion. “No. No! I’m not leaving you!”
“You have to.” A pained expression crossed his face and he leaned in, cupping my chin and lifting my face to his.
“I’m not leaving you,” I said again, shaking my head. Terrified, I caught his wrist and squeezed. “We’ll run. Together. Just like we planned. I’ve got everything ready.”
His hand fell away as I turned my back and went to the storage unit tucked into the wall of our home. I hit the button and at my touch, the door slid open.
“You were gone for days—you said it would only take until nightfall, but I got everything ready,” I said, grabbing my pack and tugging it out. His was heavier. I had to drag it out, but I managed. “Why were you gone so…”
I’d turned as I spoke, but the words froze inside me when I saw him.
He’d stripped open his shirt and stood with his back to me.
A device barely larger than my thumb ran down the heavy, ridged muscles of his neck.
“What…” I swallowed. “What is that?”
“It’s the bioseal he hired me to make. They were waiting for me, Caz. They abused me and stuck this bioseal inside me.” Turning back to me, he pulled the tunic on. “Or at least a cheap imitation. Somebody sold me out, told him where I’d be, and his men captured me.”
The bioseal—I gasped and shoved the back of my fist against my mouth to stifle the sound. Orion had studied to be a doctor before turning his attention to science and development.
The bioseal had been intended to save dying patients.
“Orion…?” I hesitated, fear turning me cold. “Why do you have one? You’re not ill.”
“Aren’t I?” His laugh was a bittersweet echo as he moved toward me. “It’s his design—not mine. This…thing is intended to be used as a weapon, a tool. And he’s got it inside my head. You need to get away before he catches up to me. I’ve managed to modify some of the mechanisms, but he’ll track me down, sooner or later. I want you gone before either he gets a hold of me and undoes what I did or he finds us here.”
“No!” I caught his shirt in my hands. “You come with me. You got away.”
Whatever he’d been about to say froze on his lips as we both heard a sound.
“No.” Orion’s harsh whisper was almost inaudible.
My heart thundered as he shoved me behind him. “Get to the skimmer, Caz. You have to go—now.”
“Wake up, Caz.”
The hard, flatly delivered words drew me out of a dazed, dark stupor.
Caz…
For a moment, I smiled, stretched—
Painfully bright light seared my eyes and I jerked upright.
Large hands caught me, steadied me before I could fall from the table to a white floor.
Floor?
“Where am I?”
“On the Embassy’s ship,” Orion said shortly. “Once you were safely under, I had you transported. The seal is deactivated and gone.”
“Gone?” I parroted the words back to him, uncertain if I understood what he meant.
He flicked a look at me. “Yes. Gone. You’ll need a few days to heal. We’ve already started you on the synthetics you’ll need to amplify your healing—as well as given you nutrients and a calorie booster. You’re malnourished, underweight, and our scans show that you recently dealt with space sickness so we’re addressing that as well. But in a few days, you’ll feel normal—physically.”
He was no longer looking at me. Instead, he focused on information on a comm panel in front of him. He sounded like a damn automaton, some bit of artificial intelligence crafted in the form of a human. A very desirable human.
I closed my eyes. There was a dull ache at the base of my skull where the bioseal should be.
“You mean…you were…it worked?”
He glanced at me. “Of course. As I said, the design was inferior to mine. Now…”
He turned to face me fully. “If you’re going to kill me, please do it.”
Orion’s warm, green eyes had turned to ice.
I remembered when they’d been soft and full of love, laughter and light.
Now there were only shadows in those jeweled depths. “What happened?”
He didn’t pretend to misunderstand. “I don’t have time for that story. I must return to the city if you’re not going to kill me.”
So blunt and to the point, he was.
Absently, I brushed my hand against my hip. My blaster was still there.
“I didn’t touch your weapons, Caz.”
“Silence.”
He frowned at me.
“My name is Silence. Caz…that’s not who I am anymore.” I shook my head and looked away. “Whoever that girl was, Gold killed her.”
“Then why do I still see her when I look at you?”
I didn’t answer.
And when he began to pack up his gear, I remained where I was.
“Come.” Even when he slid out of the room, leaving me alone, I didn’t move.
Alone, I drew my knees up to my chest and fought the urge to cry.
I stood there, frozen, as Orion flew away into the golden light of the planet’s myriad suns.
He’d done it.
I’d left the Embassy vessel, unmolested and with nobody even attempting to stop me. They all noticed me, but I had the feeling Orion had told them to let me pass. When I disembarked, a black-furred quadruped had met me and, using a translator, told me that he had a transport that would take me back to my vessel.
And now, here I was, staring at a holo of Gold’s face as he tried to communicate with a bioseal that no longer existed.
“Are you having troubles, Gold?” I asked. The impassive sound of my voice unsettled me. I sounded…dead.
Gold’s eyes flashed to me. “You don’t want to defy me this way, Silence.”
“Actually, I’ve wanted to defy you in every way for longer than you can imagine.” It was the truth. So why didn’t I feel…pleased? Why did the sight of his fury and frustration—his impotence—cause absolutely nothing inside me?
He rose, leaning in closer to the cam, his eyes slitted on me. I waggled my fingers at him in a cheerful little wave. It should have made me laugh to see his eyes light with rage.
“I can do anything I want now,” I said softly. “I can fly my speeder
off to one of the sin resorts a few systems over, hire three or four pleasure givers to indulge me for hours, or I can disappear, go to the farthest reaches of the galaxy and you can’t stop me.”
“I’ll find you.” His voice was a silken whisper. “You know I will.”
That broke through. My apathy died and finally, something real moved inside me. An emotion. Hot and ugly and bright, the savage joy caused a smile to split my face. “Goldman, I’m planning on it.”
His eyes flickered. “What did you call me?”
Oops. Shrugging, I said, “I think you heard me.”
As his face slowly went red with rage, I rolled my eyes. “Come on. What do you think happened? Do you think I merrily tinkered away on the seal on my own? That I discovered that it was corroding on its own? Nooooo…I had help.” Serenely, I smiled at him. “An old friend, you might say.”
I expected another sign of his fury, but to my surprise, amusement snaked its way onto his face, worked its way into his voice. “An old friend…Caz? Really. Don’t you remember what he did? What he’s responsible for?”
Out of his line of view, I gripped the armrests of the small seat. Tucked into the small cockpit of my dark-speeder, I faced him as a shiver tripped up my spine. “He’s responsible for far less than you, Gold.”
I leaned forward, intent on ending the comm, but Gold’s laughter stopped me.
“Really? I saved your life, Silence. Orion ended it.” He brushed a finger across the cam’s eye and I went still, imagined that I could feel his touch on me again, across the miles and planets and systems that separated us. “Tell me again what he’s responsible for.”
I ended the comm.
Slowly, I rose.
I didn’t make it to the personal facilities before I hit my knees and started to puke.
If I were smart, I would have powered up my speeder and disappeared, just like I’d told Gold.
I had options.
I could call in a few favors, get a new face, alter my body type so that I looked nothing like the assassin known as Silence.
Out of all my options, though, what was I doing?
I leaned against the sol-glider and studied the single dwelling. I was in the small area set up outside Jiral for offworld delegates. Bless their self-righteous, bigoted, evil hearts, the Hsainiens had made it very easy for me to find the man I needed to see.
Most of the Embassy’s crew would stay on the ship, but the security team and the delegates themselves would stay here.
It was longstanding tradition with the Embassy, I knew, to accept any hospitality extended. There was less chance of offending anybody, and while I didn’t see what it mattered if they offended assholes like the Hsainiens, the Embassy wouldn’t think along those lines.
I’d recognized Orion’s glider and I was going by my gut feeling that this was the place he was staying in. I’d followed my gut on bigger things, although for some reason, this felt like the biggest gamble of my life.
It had been hours since I’d emptied my stomach, but I could still smell the stink of my own sickness and my stomach continued to twist. There was nothing left for me to vomit up, but my body still tried.
Really, though, this was a much better option than any of the others.
I had to see him one more time.
I had to know just what it was I hadn’t remembered.
Specifically, one thing—or one day, to be exact.
The last day.
I remembered the pain in my throat when I screamed. I remembered the terror and the despair.
But I didn’t remember all of it and I needed to.
I don’t know how long I’d been waiting for him, but I knew immediately when he was approaching.
The long, slim glider came to a stop in front of the dwelling and he was the only one to disembark. A couple of voices from inside the transport drifted to me, and he nodded with what seemed like only the vaguest interest.
He remained there on the pathway, staring after the fading lights of the glider for what seemed like forever.
I was just about to announce myself when he softly said, “Silence.”
I stiffened.
How had he known I was here? I’d been cloaked ever since I left my speeder, hidden outside the compound. Too far away for my comfort too. It would take me ten minutes of flat-out sprinting, using the boosted speed my suit gave me, to reach it. Those ten minutes could spell life or death.
When he turned to look at me, or in my direction, I hesitated. I didn’t want to let my cloaking drop out here. I didn’t sense anybody and my tech hadn’t alerted me to the presence of others, but that didn’t mean I was ready to risk it.
“We’ll talk inside,” he said, his voice so low I barely heard it.
As he started for the entry, I pushed away from his sol-glider and fell into step a few feet behind him.
The door slid open at his approach and he lingered there as he flashed on the lights, giving me a chance to slip by him. I heard him take a deep drag of air into his lungs, and for some reason, it made me shiver.
Once I was inside, he moved out of the doorway and the panel slid back in place, sealing us inside.
“I should have known it was you. Before you even said anything, before I really looked into your eyes,” he said.
When I deactivated my cloaking, he was staring straight at me, looking me dead in the eyes.
“Yeah?” I curled my lip at him. “How?”
“Because…nothing and nobody in the entire universe has that particular scent. It’s…” His lids drooped. “It’s intoxicating. I’ve missed having it on my skin.”
I lifted my blaster. Until that moment, it had been hidden by my body.
He didn’t look surprised though.
“Are the talks done?” I asked.
“Do you care?”
“No.” In retrospect, I should have. But after ten years of hell, there was so little of me left, how could I care?
“Then what does it matter?” He held out his hands. “End it, then.”
My hand started to tremble and I steadied it through sheer will alone.
Blood roared in my ears.
“Tell me about that day.”
Orion closed his eyes. “No. You don’t want the knowledge that lies at the end of that road, Ca— I’m sorry. Silence.”
He corrected himself, but I still heard the echo of my name—the name of the girl who’d suffered so much because of this man.
“I’m a big girl now, Orion.” I gave him a tight smile. “I get to decide if I want to know or not—and I want to know. Now.”
I emphasized that point by squeezing down on the trigger hard enough to make it power up with a faint hum.
He laughed bitterly. “If you think the promise of my death frightens me, then you know nothing of me. I yearn for death.”
There was nothing but honesty in his gaze.
Following my instincts, I shifted the blaster to my neck.
I wasn’t prepared for the fury of his response.
“No!”
I backed away from him. “Your death doesn’t bother you but mine would?” I listened as the blaster continued to whine. “Why should my dying bother you at all? Even if you’re a doctor—or if you were—I long for death as well. Death and the peace it will offer.”
“Put it down.” His gaze was locked on the blaster I held, as though nothing in the world mattered more than that. “Lower the weapon and put it away and I’ll…”
Even from across the room, I could hear him swallow.
“I’ll tell you,” he whispered.
I lowered the weapon and lifted a brow. “Then do it.”
“Not until you put the blaster away…Silence.”
I frowned, but complied.
In the split second I took my gaze away
from him, he pounced.
I sucked in a breath and threw myself backward, but it was too late. I ended up pinned underneath his heavy body, and to be honest, I think I wanted to be there. To feel him against me, one more time.
It was the only logical reason for letting him catch me so easily.
And it was the stupidest move. I fought not to break down as we scuffled and he ended it by simply wrenching my hands over my head.
Panic started to edge in and I jerked against his hold. “Let me go,” I said, squeezing the words out.
“I won’t hurt you,” he said.
And then I felt his hand move down.
I twisted and jerked and heaved, trying to tear away from him, but he was so strong.
And then, in a blink, he let my wrists go.
I gaped at him.
“I just had to get the blaster away.” Torment darkened his features and he reached up.
When he touched my cheek, tears threatened to blind me but I blinked them back. “I can’t watch you die again, Caz,” he murmured.
I blinked. Shock rippled through me.
Die again…?
Then his mouth brushed mine. “I can’t do it.”
Closing my eyes, I told myself to get away.
But what I did was turn my mouth into his kiss.
A hunger, so dark and deep and desperate, sprang to life inside me and I reached up, curling my arms around his neck.
He groaned against my lips.
“End this,” he demanded, his mouth moving against mine. “End this before it’s too late.”
“It’s already too late.” I curled my legs around him and arched up.
His body went rigid and for the briefest span of time, he did nothing.
And then he was on his feet, sweeping me up with ease.
The walls whirled around us and time blurred together.
When I could think again, barely, I realized we were in the sleeping unit, a bed that was too hard and unyielding against my back, while he knelt on the floor in front of me. I reached for the tab at my neck, and my suit went pliable, allowing him to peel it from me.
Cool air kissed my skin, skin that had been heated for far too long. There was a slight tug as the sleeve of my suit caught on the bracer I wore, and then another as he fought off the solid boots I’d worn to protect my feet against the harsh, unforgiving terrain of Hsain.
Final Protocol Page 9