He whirled back to her. “No! It isn’t! You’re talking about adoption. That’s a big step for anyone, much less a single woman.”
“I realize that.”
He frowned. “You’re young, Sierra. You’ll eventually have children of your own.”
“I hope so. I want Bowie to have brothers and sisters. I’m sure you understand it’s not good to grow up alone.”
“And it’s damn sure not good to grow up believing you’re a real part of the family when you aren’t!”
Like a cold rain, disappointment washed through her. “Oh. So that’s where you’re coming from,” she said with regret. “Well, I’m sorry I asked for your help. But since you are a lawyer and my friend—my closest friend—you were my first choice.”
Sierra didn’t wait for him to respond. She brushed past him and walked out of the nursery. As she hurried toward the kitchen, tears burned her throat, but she refused to give in to them. Alex might think she was a pushover, but he was going to see just how tough she could be.
She was bending over the bassinet to make sure Bowie was still sleeping, when Alex came up behind her and wrapped his hand around her upper arm.
“Come here. We’ve got to talk.”
The hurt part of her wanted to resist him. But the sensible side realized the two of them had to talk. She didn’t want to remain at loggerheads with him. She loved him. She needed his arms around her. She needed his support.
“All right.”
She allowed him to lead her into the living room where the television was tuned in to the weather channel. Sierra didn’t need to see the forecast. She could already predict a brewing storm.
Sierra sat down on the couch and expected him to join her. Instead he stood in front of her for a moment, quietly studying her face, and then he began to pace around the room until she got the impression she was on the witness stand and he was about to cut her to pieces.
After a moment, she said, “I thought you wanted to talk.”
“I do. I’m trying to think of a way to make you understand that adopting Bowie is all wrong. For you. For me. For Bowie.”
She tried not to flinch at his harsh words.
“Why?” she demanded. “How could loving and nourishing a child be wrong? Alex, I don’t understand. You do have a heart and sometimes you even use it.”
He stopped in the middle of the room and twisted his head in her direction. “This is not a time for sarcasm,” he accused.
Her mouth popped open. “Then don’t use any on me,” she snapped.
He appeared to be taken aback by her sudden show of fire and Sierra watched him walk over and take a seat next to her.
“Listen, Sierra, none of this has anything to do with Bowie—”
“I beg your pardon?” she interrupted hotly. “It has everything to do with him!”
His hand came up before she could finish speaking.
“Just wait until I finish, please.”
She glared and he continued, “I love Bowie. You might not think I’m capable of such an emotion, but I am. And, in the long run, I want what’s best for the boy. He needs parents. Two of them. A nice married couple who will see that he’s loved and cared for.”
“I don’t have to be married to give Bowie love and a good home,” she shot back at him. “You and I both know that. Besides, I’m only twenty-eight. I don’t plan on staying single for the rest of my life.”
No quick retort came from his lips and Sierra realized her remark had taken their battle to dangerous ground.
His jaw like granite, he said, “Really. Is that what this is all about? You want the two of us to get married and adopt Bowie?”
She started to scream “No” out loud, but somehow managed to stop the word before it passed her lips. How could she answer no, when he’d just spoken her most fervent wish? Of course she’d imagined her and Alex married with Bowie and more children to go with him. It was a wonderful dream, even though, in the back of her mind, she understood it would never happen.
Her heart aching, she asked softly, “Would that be so bad?”
Cursing, he jumped to his feet. “Hell, yes! I don’t want to be married. I don’t want to have to trust anyone that much. And I sure as hell don’t want to be the one who has to tell Bowie that somewhere out there he has two parents who didn’t want him, who deserted him without a backward glance!”
Pushing herself to her feet, Sierra’s lips quivered as she met his fierce gaze.
“Well, don’t worry, Alex Calloway. Because I wouldn’t marry you even if you got down on your belly and crawled across the floor to ask me!”
His nostrils flared with anger. “I wouldn’t turn myself into a snake for any woman.”
Sierra laughed scathingly. “Turn into? You already are one, Alex. Poison through and through.”
Not waiting around to hear more, she held her head up and walked briskly to the kitchen and began to blindly gather up the remnants of their special meal.
Her plans to surprise Alex had backfired big time, she thought wretchedly. But at least now his feelings toward her and Bowie were crystal clear. There was nothing permanent about them.
She was scraping plates, hoping the simple task would stop her hands from trembling, when she heard footsteps behind her.
Turning, she saw Alex standing in the doorway. A grim look was on his face and slowly but surely she felt her insides dying. “Yes,” she acknowledged.
“I’ve gotten my things loaded into the SUV. I’m leaving.”
He might as well have punched her in the stomach with his fist. It wouldn’t have hurt any more than his blunt farewell.
Wiping her hands on a dish towel, she walked toward him. “You’re leaving?”
He nodded and she couldn’t help notice that he was avoiding eye contact. Maybe this wasn’t any easier for him than it was for her, she thought.
“Well, I guess it’s for the best,” she said soberly. “There’s no sense in us trying to be together when we’re really worlds apart. And I—I’m sorry I said those nasty things to you, Alex. You have a right to feel as you do.”
“I’m glad you understand that much,” he said stiffly.
“Goodbye, Alex.”
“Yeah,” he muttered, then turned on his heel and hurried out of the room.
Just as Sierra heard the front door click behind him, Bowie started to squirm and cry. As Sierra picked the baby up from the bassinet, she cried along with him.
Chapter Eleven
Early the next morning, Sierra was giving Bowie a bath in the kitchen sink when the telephone rang.
Muttering with annoyance, she ignored the sound until she’d rinsed the baby and wrapped him in a towel. By then the caller had hung up so she laid Bowie on the table to diaper him. She’d just finished that task, when the phone began to shrill a second time.
Quickly she wrapped a thin blanket around Bowie and hurried over to the portable phone on the kitchen cabinet.
“Hello,” she said with a hint of weary exasperation. She’d had one of those horrible nights where she’d not gotten a wink of sleep. With Alex’s leaving, her insomnia had returned big time and she was totally drained from having no rest.
“Oh, you’re there. I had just about decided you must already be at work.”
Her heart sank when she heard her old college friend Gayle’s voice on the other end of the line. Damn, damn. Today was the group’s regular lunch day at the Longhorn. What was she going to do? She couldn’t face Alex. Not today.
“Hi, Gayle. What’s up?” she asked while desperately trying to keep her voice light and natural. Which was a major effort when her nasal passages were swollen from last night’s flood of tears.
“Just calling to make sure you can make it to lunch today. And if you haven’t eaten breakfast yet, then don’t. I want you to try that fudge brownie dessert with me. Remember?”
A fattening dessert was the least of her worries, Sierra thought. “Uh—I don’t know, Gayle. Something has c
ome up.”
“Are you sick?” the blonde quickly questioned.
“No, no. Nothing like that.”
“Oh, then it’s work.” Gayle was quick to presume. “Sorry, Sierra. Can’t you get away even for thirty minutes? I wanted to see how things have been going with you since old Chad headed for the hills.”
Sierra nearly choked on something between a sob and a laugh. “Gayle—listen, I really don’t think I can come to lunch today. And it’s not my job that’s causing the problem. Actually I’m on a short leave from work right now.”
“Hmm. Must be nice being a lady of leisure,” Gayle teased. “So what’s the problem?”
“Alex.”
There was a long pause, then Gayle said in a quiet, strained voice, “Oh?”
Sierra could imagine the other woman’s red lips pursing with disapproval. “Yes. We—uh—had an argument. And I really don’t want to sit across the table from him right now. If you know what I mean.”
“Dear God. It must have been an awful one,” Gayle exclaimed. “What happened? I saw you two together out in the parking lot talking after our last lunch. Is that when you argued?”
Bowie was eating his fist and beginning to put up a fuss for his bottle. In an attempt to pacify him, Sierra gently bounced him against her shoulder. “Gayle, it’s a long story. And I really don’t want to go into it over the phone.”
By now Bowie was letting out a squall of impatience and naturally Gayle picked up on the sound.
“Sierra, do I hear a baby in your house?”
Sierra sighed. Maybe it would be good for her to meet with Gayle and get some of this awful weight off her shoulders, she thought. She’d always shared her personal life with the other woman, it shouldn’t matter that Alex was their mutual friend. Talking to Gayle would be much easier than facing her mother or sisters right now. The last thing she wanted was for her family to find out she’d already lost another man.
Oh well, at least there was one good thing about Alex’s leaving, Sierra thought glumly: she wouldn’t have to do some heinous task for her sisters now.
“Yes. That’s Bowie,” she answered Gayle. “He’s three weeks old and I’m a foster mother now.”
“Sierra!” Gayle shrieked with surprise. “When did this come about? And why haven’t you called me?”
Just like a waiting man, Bowie’s patience had worn completely thin. His face was as red as a cowboy’s bandana and he was screaming so loudly in Sierra’s ear she could hardly decipher Gayle’s words.
“Sorry, Gayle. I’ve got to get off the telephone. I’ll meet you at the burger hut around twelve, okay?”
“Wild horses couldn’t keep me away,” Gayle assured her.
It would be raining, Alex thought grimly, as he pulled into the covered parking area of San Antonio International Airport. He didn’t like to fly when it was raining, even in a big jet. But for the first time in ages, he’d managed to clear the weekend of work, and since he had nothing else to do, he’d decided to fly up to Dallas to see his parents. His father’s birthday wasn’t for another week, but he’d called and warned his mother that this would be the only time he could make it.
Inside the airport terminal, Alex waited until the last minute to go through security and board the plane. Later he was glad he’d not been too eager to get into the confines of the airliner. The flight was grounded for forty minutes due to lightning. A delay that was longer than the amount of time it took a jet to fly to Dallas.
To pass the time, Alex rested his head on the back of the seat and tried to sleep. He’d had a trying week at work with everything from taking on a client accused of murdering his wife, to thugs begging for his help to keep them out of prison, to a woman who wanted to sue her ex-husband because he’d taken her cat.
Who the hell was he kidding? Alex asked himself. He had that sort of stuff waltz in and out of his office every week. Normally he thrived on the chaos and even enjoyed Pauline’s tirades. She gave him something to laugh about. But this week, his secretary had stretched his nerves to the breaking point and he’d ended up yelling at her every fifteen minutes.
He realized he was a temperamental man and he’d never understood how Pauline put up with him. But he was thankful that she did. He’d have to give her a raise or send her on some special cruise or something. His devoted secretary was irreplaceable and he didn’t want to lose her.
Suddenly from somewhere behind him a baby’s cry pierced the plane’s interior.
Bowie!
Like a fool, he twisted around in his first-class seat to look. Several rows behind him, he spotted a woman holding a baby against her shoulder. The child was wearing tiny bib overalls and the woman was patting his back in an effort to soothe and quiet him.
The sight caused Alex’s gut to clench with regret and he jerked his head back to the front of the plane and tried to push the image out of his mind. Damn it, one of the reasons he’d come on this trip was to make an effort to get Sierra and Bowie out of his mind. But he should have known that was stupid, wishful thinking. Everywhere, everything reminded him of the two of them.
The past week had been more awful than he could have ever imagined. He’d never felt pain like this in his whole life. Not even when he’d found his adoption papers and he’d discovered the truth of his birth.
The night Alex had walked out of Sierra’s house, he’d never expected to feel the sort of misery that was now weighing him down. He’d expected to feel a bit glum for a day or two, then his head would clear and he’d realize he was relieved to be disentangled from the family situation he’d created by being with Sierra.
Unfortunately it hadn’t worked the way he’d expected. So far, he’d never experienced anything remotely related to relief. He ached to see Sierra. He wanted to hold her, make love with her, the way they’d made love before. He wanted to see little Bowie, hold the baby against his chest and kiss his smooth cheek.
“Sir?”
A hand touched his shoulder and he looked up to see a young woman with curly black hair bending over him. For a split second Sierra’s face swam in front of his vision.
“Sir, I’m sorry to disturb you. Would you like something to drink once we get in the air? A soda, water, a bourbon and Coke, perhaps?”
Alex mentally shook himself and looked up at the flight attendant. She was a young beauty with a wide smile and blue eyes that were twinkling brightly back at him. Any other time, he would have been taking advantage of the situation. But today the woman didn’t spark even a tiny interest in him. He felt dead and empty inside and he was smart enough to know that the void couldn’t be filled by just a pretty face.
“No, thanks,” he told her. “But could you tell me when we might be taking off?”
“I believe the weather system is almost past us now, sir. We should be taking off shortly.”
She moved on down the aisle of passengers and Alex let out a heavy sigh. No doubt about it, he thought grimly. He was a ruined man.
Two hours later, Alex’s flight set down at Dallas-Fort Worth International. Since he only had a carry-on bag, he walked straight to the outer terminal and began to search through the crowd for his parents. The two of them had insisted on picking Alex up at the airport instead of allowing him to take a taxi to their home in north Dallas.
Thankfully he spotted his mother rather quickly and called to her over the heads of several rambunctious boys pushing and fighting their way toward the next terminal.
Where were the little heathens’ parents? he wondered. Never, under any circumstance, would he allow Bowie to behave so wildly in public.
Don’t worry, Alex. It’s not going to be up to you to see that Bowie is taught manners and respect. Some other man will come into Sierra’s life and help her guide the little boy into manhood.
“Alex!” his mother shouted excitedly.
She started toward him and Alex increased his long strides to pass the rowdy boys and meet up with his mother.
“Hi, Mom. You look g
reat.” He hugged her close and kissed her cheek and she beamed up at him with a joy that left him somehow ashamed of himself.
“Gosh, it’s so good to see you, son.” She kissed him back, then turned to her husband who’d stepped up behind the two of them. “Doesn’t he look wonderful, darlin’?”
A wide smile split Mitch Calloway’s face as he stepped forward and reached for his son’s hand. With a firm grip, Alex shook his father’s hand. Then, at the last moment, before he released his hold, something made Alex move even closer and give his dad a hug.
“Nice to see you, Dad.”
Mitch, a tall, ruggedly built man with iron-gray hair, patted Alex’s shoulder with obvious affection. “It’s wonderful to have you home for a few days, son.”
The older man’s gaze left Alex to look at his wife and even though a word wasn’t spoken between the two of them, Alex could see they were silently communicating, the way couples did after they’d been together for many, many years. And they were both expressing their surprise over Alex’s warm greeting.
The whole idea left Alex feeling a little awkward and he reached down and picked up the leather bag sitting next to his feet.
“Well, if you two are ready, let’s get out of here,” he suggested. “This has been a heck of a flight.”
“We were beginning to get worried,” Emily said as the three of them headed toward the nearest exit. “Especially after we heard the flight was delayed due to thunderstorms. I don’t even trust these planes in dry weather, much less in a storm.”
“Well, he’s here safe and sound now, dear. You can quit chewing your nails,” Mitch teased.
Emily laughed as she looped her arm through Alex’s. “Your dad is trying to be amusing,” she said to Alex. “He knows I couldn’t chew these acrylic things even if I had beaver teeth.”
Alex’s mother was always graciously dressed in feminine clothing and her hair, makeup and nails groomed to a tee. She was the epitome of a Dallas lady and Alex couldn’t help thinking how different she and Sierra were in their outward appearances, but how alike they were in matters of the heart. They were both loving, caring women who put the needs of others before their own. How many men in the world were lucky enough to be loved by women like that? he wondered.
Fortune's Heirs: Reunion Page 48