by David Archer
In Christ,
Sabrina
Cassie read through the letter twice and then put it back into the envelope. She looked up at Carolyn, who was staring at her.
“Do you think this is true? Do you think she’s actually happy?”
“Yes,” Carolyn said, dabbing at her nose with a tissue. “Sabrina was always looking for something to make her life seem worthwhile. She always had this thing, like she thought she was some kind of bad luck for everyone she knew, so I think finding religion is probably the only way she could ever get over what happened.”
Cassie sat and stared at her for a long moment, her own sense of justice at war with her awareness of right and wrong. If Sabrina had killed Raymond, even in self-defense, there were procedures that should have been followed. At the same time, Cassie knew firsthand how desperate the situation can become when you are dealing with the threats of a violent and abusive person. She had no doubt Sabrina had felt there was no choice; it was simply the way it was handled afterward that was creating a dilemma.
“Carolyn,” she said slowly, “how are you handling what happened?”
Carolyn looked down at her coffee cup for several seconds, then raised her eyes to meet Cassie’s. “I feel like I deserve to be punished,” she said. “I feel like I’ve gotten away with something no one should ever get away with. The problem is, if I open up and say anything, I’m getting her in trouble, too.”
Cassie waved the letter. “She sounds like she’s ready to accept that,” she said. “And if it was honestly the way she told you it was, I’d say there’s a good chance that it would be ruled as self-defense. The only thing that either of you is honestly likely to get in trouble for is trying to cover it up. There are laws against that, and it doesn’t matter whether the killing was justified or not.”
Carolyn sniffled again. “I know,” she said. “It’s just that, if you do anything about this, Sabrina’s going to know it was me that told. It would have to be me, because no one else knew anything about it.”
Cassie looked at her, her own sympathy for the woman’s predicament making it hard to decide what to do. Finally, she forced herself to look at it from a strictly moral standpoint.
“Carolyn, how about this? Let me go see if I can find Sabrina, and give her the chance to do the right thing and come in on her own. If she does, I’ll leave it up to her whether she mentions your involvement or not. I won’t say a word. How does that sound?”
Carolyn stared at her cup, slowly turning it around and around as she did so. “That might be a good idea,” she said, “about letting her come in on her own. Either way, I need to get this guilt off me. If she comes in, then I’ll go with her and we’ll do this together.” She looked up at Cassie. “Just promise me one thing. If she doesn’t, then I’m going to go in and say I did it. Don’t try to stop me, okay?”
Cassie shook her head. “Carolyn, that would be stupid,” she said. “Under the circumstances, Sabrina might get away with saying it was self-defense. I don’t know that you could, I’m not sure the police would believe that in your case. They could charge you with murder.”
“I know that,” Carolyn said. “But will you promise me?”
“No. I’m sorry, but I can’t make a promise like that. Like she said in her letter, she’s the one who did this and put you in this position. She’s the one who needs to make it right. I can’t promise you you won’t end up in some trouble over helping her hide the body, but you shouldn’t take the blame for the killing.” She laid the letter on the table. “I’m going to go and see if I can find her. I’ll let you know what I find out, but I can’t stand by and watch you take the blame for something someone else did. Don’t ask that of me, because it’s not going to happen.”
Carolyn stared at her for a moment, tears still running down her cheeks sporadically, but she said nothing. After a moment, Cassie got up and started toward the front door. She had almost made it when Carolyn called her back.
“Will you do me one other favor, then?”
“What’s that?” Cassie asked.
“When you find her,” Carolyn said, “tell her that if she’ll come in like you say, I’ll go with her and hold her hand through whatever happens. Tell her I’ll be there for her, no matter what. Will you do that?”
Cassie gave her her best smile. “That I’ll do,” she said. Then she turned around and walked out the door.
When she got to her car, she picked up her phone and dialed Dex’s number.
“Cassie? Something wrong?”
“Everything, usually,” she said. “Are you busy for lunch?”
“No. There’s a little café right next door to the dealership. Want to meet me there?”
“Yeah,” Cassie said. “But I’m buying, this time.”
Dex chuckled at her. “Okay, if you say so. I get off for lunch in about half an hour.”
“It’ll take me that long to get down there,” she replied. “I’ll see you then.”
She headed down toward the Ford dealership and actually got to the café a few minutes before Dex did. She went in and got them a table, as far back in the corner as she could manage. The waitress had looked like she was about to run out the door when she saw Cassie’s face, but somehow managed to keep her smile on. Cassie ordered coffee while she waited, and it was a younger waitress who finally brought it to her.
Dex walked in and saw her, then waved as he crossed the dining room. He slid into the chair across from her and then looked at her face. “Well,” he said, “when you called, I just thought maybe you were missing my company already, but the look on your face says you got some kind of news for me.”
Cassie rolled her eye and shook her head. “How do you do that? How do you manage to read minds the way you do?”
“I don’t read minds,” he said, “but you’d be amazed what I can pick up from body language and facial expressions. The captain used to call me his human lie detector, because I can almost always spot it when somebody’s not telling the truth.”
“Well, stop doing it to me. A girl’s gotta have a secret now and then.” She took a sip of her coffee and signaled the waitress to come over. They put in their orders and then Cassie looked at him again. “Do you want to hear it now, or would you rather eat first?”
“Tell me,” he said. “I have a feeling I’m really not going to like this.”
“It’s amazing what people will tell you when you look like this,” Cassie said. “I’ve learned that most people, for some reason, feel like somebody with scars is someone they can confide in. I started out by talking to some of Raymond’s friends this morning, and while they admitted Raymond was probably not much good, they kept telling me something no one else ever picked up on. Apparently, there was a woman who was often seen hanging out with Raymond, but nobody knew who she was. One of the guys, though, ran into her a few months after Raymond disappeared and she told him that no one was ever going to see Raymond again. I thought that was interesting, so I started trying to figure out how to track that woman down. The only thing I knew about her was that she had dark brown hair with a white streak in the front. One guy told me it was like her hair turned white overnight, because he’d never seen that before.”
Dex narrowed his eyes. “Brown hair with a white streak? I’ve seen that woman, somewhere. Did you have any luck?”
“Actually, I did,” Cassie said. “After I got done with those guys, I started talking to some of Sabrina’s friends this morning, and one of them was one of those people who just naturally wants to confide in old Freda, here.” She took a deep breath. “It turns out the woman with the white streak was one of her friends, a woman named Carolyn Stern. Did you know her?”
“Carolyn, yeah,” Dex said. “I think she’s the one I was trying to think of, with the white streak. I ran into her once or twice after they disappeared, and I vaguely remember that white streak of hair.”
“Well, good, because she’s the one who told me what I’m about to share with you. Remember
how we thought maybe Raymond killed Sabrina, and then ran away?”
Dex narrowed his eyes. “Yeah?”
“Try flipping it around a hundred and eighty degrees. Raymond showed up at Sabrina’s place one night and dragged her out into the country. He took her to some house that he insisted he was going to buy once they got married, and that’s when she finally had enough. She started screaming at him that he was an idiot and crazy and all that, and that she was never going to marry him, and he pulled a gun on her.”
“Oh, crap,” Dex said. He stared at Cassie for a moment, and she saw his eyes welling up with tears. “And you’re going to tell me that she somehow got hold of the gun and killed him, right?”
“Bingo,” Cassie said. “She started telling him she loved him and that she was willing to marry him and do whatever it took, and he let his guard down. He set the gun in his lap, she grabbed it, bang-bang-bang-bang, and suddenly she had a dead man on her hands. She decided she needed to get rid of the body and disappear, and that’s what she did.”
He wiped briefly at his eyes and then looked at her again. “And how did Carolyn know all this?”
“Well, that could be because Sabrina called her to help get rid of the body. Afterward, she took Sabrina home to pack some things and then dropped her off in Oklahoma City.”
Dex looked down at the table and put his head in his hands. “Oh, jeez,” he said. “Dammit, I wish she would have let me handle that guy.” He looked up at her. “The thing is, if he pulled a gun on her and she got hold of it, wouldn’t that be considered self-defense?”
“It could be,” Cassie said, “but Sabrina was afraid because she shot him four times. She had in her head that shooting him so many times would make it murder instead of self-defense, and I don’t know for sure whether she’s correct or not. I think most people would probably do the same thing if they felt threatened and weren’t trained in how to use a gun. However, it’s possible they might say it was some kind of overkill, and that might make it worse for her, I don’t know. The thing is, by getting rid of the body and running away, she’s undoubtedly gotten herself into more trouble than she would’ve had if she had simply called the police when it happened.”
He nodded his head. “So, what now?”
Cassie looked at him and felt a surge of sympathy. “Well, legally, I should go to the police with what I know. If I do, that’s going to end with a warrant out for her arrest and probably another one for Carolyn. On the other hand, I thought about going to see if I can find her and convince her to come in voluntarily. If I can, there’s still a good possibility that the killing could be ruled self-defense or justifiable, and then all she would be looking at is whatever they charge you with for covering up when somebody gets killed.”
“If you’re going, I’m going with you,” Dex said.
“I think that would be a very bad idea,” Cassie replied. “Just knowing about this and not calling the police could conceivably get both of us charged with a felony, for obstructing justice. I don’t think you should get any more involved than you already are. You asked me to look into it, and I’m trying to do that. I’ve got a lead that may let me find her, so I want to track her down. When I find her, I have to give her a choice. Either come back with me voluntarily or I have to tell the police what I know.”
“Come on, Cassie,” he said. “Forget the fact I once had a crush on this girl, I still think of her as a friend. If she had come to me when this happened, I would have helped any way I could. Don’t cut me out now.”
“Hey, dumb ass,” Cassie said. “I’m trying to protect you. Now, this is what you asked me to do, so let me do it. Okay?”
Dex gave her a sour look, but he finally gave in. “Fine,” he said. “But if you find her, I want you to call and let me know. Tell her I’ll do whatever I can to help, okay?”
“I can do that. Funny, Carolyn told me to say basically the same thing.”
TWENTY-SIX
Interstate 44 offered the fastest route from Tulsa to Oklahoma City, and Cassie hit the road at just a few minutes after one o’clock. Considering what she had learned from Sabrina’s letter, and armed with the photo Dex had given her, she didn’t anticipate it taking a long time to find the woman. How many homeless shelters could there be that took in whole families, after all?
She rolled into Oklahoma City at shortly before three o’clock, pulled into a convenience store parking lot and used her phone to Google for homeless shelters. A moment later, her eyes went wide as the screen displayed more than thirty options.
She spent half an hour going through them, checking each one’s website and making notes of which ones accepted entire families. There were eight of them that would accept families, but only six were limited to families altogether. They would not accept single men or women at all, so Cassie decided to start with those.
Most of them were close to downtown, so she picked the first one on the screen closest to where she was at and headed for it. It took her almost twenty minutes to get there, but only five minutes to learn that there was no one on the staff who looked anything like Sabrina.
She moved to the next one, and then to the next. By the time she was headed for the sixth, she was starting to wonder if Sabrina might have moved to another city. She parked the Kia in the parking lot and walked into the shelter.
Like most of the family shelters, this one had started out as a hotel many years earlier. It was a very old three-story building that reminded Cassie of something from the old West. There was a front desk with a woman standing behind it, and Cassie walked up to it with her best smile in place. The woman, whose name tag said she was Naomi, turned toward her with a smile that vanished instantly.
“Hi,” Cassie said as Naomi stared at her. “I’m looking for a lady who might be working here.” She held out Sabrina’s picture quickly, and the woman gratefully focused her attention on it. Cassie was used to that, because people often wanted to look at anything else once they’d seen her face. “Have you seen her?”
Naomi kept her eyes on the photo for several seconds, then looked back up at Cassie, this time meeting her eye. “Why are you looking for her? Are you a police officer?”
Cassie felt a sudden rush of excitement, as she realized Naomi was dissembling. The only reason to try to stall her off would be if she knew Sabrina and felt protective of her.
“No, ma’am,” Cassie said. “My name is Cassie McGraw, and I’m just trying to help out a friend of hers who is worried about her.” It was easier to use Dex as an excuse at the moment, rather than make any attempt to explain the truth.
“Oh,” Naomi said. “Well, I’m sorry, but I don’t know her.” She tried to turn back to what she had been doing, dismissing Cassie, but Cassie reached out quickly with her left hand and laid it on Naomi’s wrist.
Naomi froze. Cassie had learned while she was in college that people tended to freeze up whenever that hand touched them.
“Naomi,” she said softly, “if you didn’t know her, you wouldn’t have asked why I was looking for her. You asked if I was a police officer, and I answered honestly that I’m not, but I can guarantee you that if I don’t find her, the police will be coming before long. I don’t know what name she’s using now, but she could be in a lot of trouble if that happens. I’m trying to help, and there’s a good chance I can if she’ll sit down and talk with me.”
Naomi stood where she was, her wrist still clamped in Cassie’s mangled hand while her eyes stared at the countertop. “She’s a good woman,” she said. “She’s not the person she used to be.”
“I believe that,” Cassie said, “but that doesn’t change the fact that she’s got something bad hanging over her head. If the police find her, it’s going to be far worse than if she faces it voluntarily. That’s why I’m here, to give her that chance.”
Naomi suddenly turned to face her. “Do you know what happened? What she went through? She’s had to completely rebuild her life, and it would be such a pity if she had to throw it a
ll away, now.”
“But that’s what I’m trying to tell you,” Cassie said. “I know all about it, probably more than you do. If she comes in on her own, we have a good chance of keeping her from getting into too much trouble, but if the police have to track her down, it will be ten times worse.”
Naomi stared at her, the muscles of her jaw clenching and unclenching. After several seconds, she seemed to resign herself to the inevitable.
“She isn’t here at the moment,” Naomi said. “She took a group down to the DHS office to get them started on assistance and food stamps. She should be back in about half an hour or so.”
“Really?” Cassie asked. “Well, then I hope you get used to my face pretty quickly because you and I are going to be new best friends until she gets here. Naomi, I’m honestly trying to help her. Please don’t try to warn her off, don’t try to send her a message or anything. If she takes off running now, it’s only going to make it that much worse for her.”
Naomi suddenly yanked her wrist away, but then she seemed to relax a bit. “Is it true, then? She really did kill someone?”
“The way I understand it, yes,” Cassie said, “but I believe there’s a good possibility that it was in self-defense and that we can prove that. I’m not a cop, I’m a social worker who specializes in dealing with abusive relationships, and the man she killed was a very dangerous stalker. There’s enough evidence of that to make me feel very good about helping her with a plea of self-defense.”
Naomi nodded slowly. “Will she have to go to jail?”
“Well, she ran away, so they may want to keep her locked up until this is settled. If she has to do any kind of sentence, I don’t think it would be terribly long. I think the only thing they might truly charge her with would be concealing a homicide, because she hid the body and didn’t tell anyone what had happened. If she had called the police that night, it would’ve been over a long time ago.”
Naomi looked down at the countertop again and shook her head. “That poor child,” she said. “I knew something was weighing on her, so one night when we were working together, I asked her if she wanted to talk and she ended up confiding in me about it all. She’s terrified, you know, she’s afraid she’ll go to prison for life.”