by DC Bastien
"Alright. I'll... thanks," she said, and hugged him on her way out.
***
[Sianor: Also cue a million Academy-days bunnies.]
[Ashroe: Because you know that they are all melting-pot when they're training.]
[Sianor: I wonder how many of them crash out of the Academy because they can't keep it in their pants?]
[Ashroe: Might even be part of the assessment.]
[Ashroe: Like, those who can't even cope with the days at the Academy are really not cut out to be Enforcers.]
[Sianor: And bars full of Ur-fans waiting for the young recruits to get some downtime.]
[Ashroe: Yep. Uniform-kinks and all the posturing on both sides of the gender line to compete for the best fangirls and fanboys.]
[Sianor: Kip fucked his way through a lot of them.]
[Ashroe: Oh definitely. And Ithon was less interested, but he went along anyway.]
[Sianor: And they wanted one another, but Ithon was all No Not Against Regs.]
[Ashroe: It's gotta sting Kip that when he left, Ith put out with another Ur.]
[Sianor: Like fuck. He's gonna wonder why Baudeline was worth risking his career over instead of him.]
[Ashroe: And I think Ith half wanted to be thrown out. I mean, deep down. On some level. Then it was... then he had no choice. He couldn't ever consciously leave the Ur, but he could let himself be kicked out.]
[Sianor: If he did, would he... would he have tracked down Kip?]
[Ashroe: Probably not overtly. Not to begin with. He'd also feel ashamed of himself, and also resent Kip a bit for getting him so twisted in knots that he threw his vocation under the wheels like that.]
[Sianor: Stupid boys!]
[Ashroe: Indeed.]
[Sianor: And Kip had sort of half-hoped when he left that he and... that they would...]
[Ashroe: So did Ith. But they just kind of both were fools and neither one wanted to admit it. And Ith was still sore that Kip left like he did.]
[Sianor: And Kip wasn't sure Ith wanted him, and he thought Ith was angry with him for leaving at all, and he didn't want the reminder of what had gone wrong...]
[Ashroe: Plus they didn't end on the best of terms.]
[Sianor: All that wanting subverted and sublimated into yelling.]
[Ashroe: Neither one of them is emotionally intelligent. Well, at least with regards to one another.]
[Sianor: For Kip sometimes I think he does understand, he just doesn't want to. Or pretends he doesn't. Wilful ignorance.]
[Ashroe: I really would run a mile from either of them in reality. And then get my binoculars or telescope out to watch them making out or beating one another up.]
[Sianor: Would you film them so I could watch later?]
[Ashroe: YES. And we could replay it whenever we wanted. Mmm.]
[Sianor: Wait... you know what comes next, right?]
[Ashroe: After watching porn?]
[Sianor: I meant in the story.]
[Ashroe: Well, I have a strong suspicion, yes. Why?]
[Sianor: Look at the chapter number.]
[Ashroe: DAMNIT.]
***
Chapter Nineteen – Mission: Aspersion
He couldn't really avoid him forever. Plus, Ithon probably didn't want to be ignored. Or did he? He kept storming off and asking for space, but he hadn't asked for space this time. Ithon Avery had always been annoyingly complicated to read, and Kip supposed he'd been in that honeymoon period for too long. Now it would be the return of the Impossible Man.
Although maybe he was being unfair. After all, he hadn't tried his hardest. Not yet. It was... it was just difficult when you all lived on a small ship and there was no real getting away from everyone else. (Unless they were kidnapped, and he didn't want that to happen again.) You couldn't have loud shouting matches around the kids, and it was a small miracle that the seven – eight, including Mes – of them in such close quarters got on as well as they did.
Ithon wasn't in their room. Since they'd met again on Jazibe they'd pretty much unofficially announced their relationship and given up on separate beds, so Kip saw his room as 'theirs', though Ithon had barely made any changes to it other than his presence. There were extra boots under the dresser, more clothes in the wardrobe. A second toothbrush, another razor. Ithon had always been one to travel light and leave a small footprint, but this was... what? Why was it worrying? Kip realised he'd never invited him to bring any personal effects. They'd just... not talked about what this was. It had happened without either of them bothering to define what 'it' was, or meant. Other than the smoking hot sex, of course. And then the cuddling. Kip liked the cuddling a lot more than he'd ever admit to, especially with someone as tall as Ith.
"Mes?"
"He's in the aft," she replied.
"Thanks." The fact that she knew what he wanted didn't surprise him. Nor did his location. Kip used to go there when he wanted some peace and quiet as it was as far from the communal areas and private cabins as it was possible to get. The least likely to cause a disturbance, the easiest place to 'hide'. As much as you could hide on a ship you could traverse from fore to aft in fifteen minutes, max.
The Enforcer had folded himself in between the structured storage racks which were currently only half-filled with essentials instead of cargo. It was eerie seeing the ship this empty this often, but when you got put on retainer by two ruling classes, this was what happened. And considering how well they were paying (danger money and all) if they played this right and didn't all (or some) wind up dead, they'd be able to work just for love instead of money. Which would be nice. Real independence, not weighing up money against principles each time. And all of this mental wandering was him avoiding the real thing he was here for, now, which was the small, Ithon-shaped curl in his storage cabins.
"Penny for your thoughts?" he asked, waiting to see if he was invited in or sent away.
"Not sure you want to buy them."
"You could give me a free sample, and I can judge for myself?"
Ithon glared dolefully out at him from his little cubby hole, so the Captain jumped into the one facing him. It was a bit of a leap to get in, and his legs swung down without reaching the ground. He could bring them up and in, but it would be undignified. He'd see how long they were here first, not wanting to cut off circulation to his toes and leave himself unable to walk.
Pained blue eyes that examined his boots, his long lashes fluttering over his cheeks. He really was attractive, Vadim had to admit. Even if he spoke as an impartial observer, Ithon had always had something to him. Of course that air of aloof mystery had been both compelling and off-putting in the extreme while they'd been in the Academy. Kip wasn't sure if they'd met in the mundane world if they'd even have gotten to know one another. Ithon took so long to warm up properly and Kip knew he'd been a bit of a card himself in his youth.
Fussing over his own bootlaces, Kip decided to edge him into the conversation.
"When did it start?"
"I went to Sol... about three months after you left. Met him pretty early on. It was strictly professional for a very long time. I didn't even think he was interested in me, and I was..." Ithon was unlacing his boot, now. A nervous gesture if ever Kip saw one. "I... don't know. I suspect I was giving out signals. I had no one, and nothing. I thought coming back to Sol would give me some sense of grounding, of... connection."
"And you found Baudeline."
"I thought he was like us. Like... me. I thought he was in the job for the good he could do, not for any other reason. Although I suppose now, with the benefit of hindsight, I realise that was likely me projecting my hopes and desires onto him."
"Hey, if he passed as a Judge for as long as he did, don't you think he fooled plenty of folks?"
"It's not the other folks I'm worried about. It's me." Ithon now had the length of his bootlace to play with and he ran it back and forth between finger and thumb. "He played me. Utterly. And I thought I could trust him, I thought... I thought
he was a good man."
"Sociopaths are good at lying."
"Not to me! I mean... I should have known. I should have suspected something was off, but I didn't. Or, if I did, I pushed it deep down with the part of me that knew that an affair was a terrible idea. But I was... I was solving crime. I was making a difference. Making our relationship public would have risked one or both of us losing our ability to do that. To help. And..."
"It's okay," Kip said, softly.
"It's not. People died, Kip. That's what got me onto the trail: people dying in patterns, without the deaths being marked as suspicious. And the causes of death were – on the surface – not suspicious. But the pattern behind who was dying? That was."
"And when you realised, you investigated."
"I investigated, but the cause of it was right there under my nose. And I didn't even notice. I was pulling my hair out about it and I couldn't even tell how evil he was! I—"
Kip slid to his feet and paced over. Hand on his upper arm, he tugged. Ithon resisted for a while before slipping from his perch. He landed awkwardly between Vadim and the wall, and relented into the hug.
"You had feelings for him. And he was – he was taking advantage of you, Ith."
"But why? He..." Ithon swallowed, and the words were even more broken when he continued. "He... could have killed me. Had me killed. Something. It would have covered over the leak. Probably happened to hundreds of people with less information than me, before. So why... why didn't he?"
"Maybe he thought you had more information than you did?"
"He pretty much knew I was in the dark, still. I went to him relatively early. And wouldn't killing me have been better if so?"
"Maybe he... really had feelings for you?" Vadim hated saying as much, but he had to admit it was a possibility. He felt Ithon go stiffer in his arms, and he stroked over the back of his neck, mumbling very quietly.
"If he did, that might even be worse."
"...why?"
"Because what kind of a man am I if a psychopathic mob boss falls for me?"
"You think who loves you changes who you are?"
Ithon tried to push him off, then, but Kip wasn't budging. He held on tighter, not letting go even when a dull, open-laced boot kicked him lightly on the shin.
"Yes! If a psychopath loved me, it would make a difference!"
"Did you love him?"
Ithon froze then.
"Kip..."
"You... you don't have to answer. Sorry. I..." He let go then, took a half-step back. Hand rubbing the back of his neck, awkwardly. "Hey. I can't say I'm not jealous. Even though I've had my own flings, and we weren't a thing back there, but somehow you rebounded from being my best friend to fucking a nutjob, so..."
He probably deserved the punch to the gut, though. It was a hard jab, and it left him utterly winded. "Asshole."
"You said yourself!" he wheezed. "I left, and you went to Sol."
"Yeah, you left."
"And you couldn't call?"
"Couldn't you?"
Ithon's gaze was full of righteous fury, now, which was better than the godawful self-loathing of before. Vadim tried to right himself, wincing.
"Ithon, if he did love you, then it just shows he's capable of love. Maybe fucked up love, but love. And why wouldn't he? You're an annoying asshole, but you're smart. Loyal. Dedicated. You're principled and you make people laugh and you do an amazing thing with your tongue and your fingers..." He tried to mimic the gesture, wanting to provoke at least a smile.
"Your pep talks suck, Kip."
"Pardon me for not having a repertoire ready for 'My Boyfriend Has An Ex Who Is Fucking Over The Galaxy'."
"You're pardoned."
"Also, you're my boyfriend." Yeah, maybe not the best way to break it to him.
"I'm sorry?"
"You should be. But I'm serious... you're my boyfriend. Whatever. Not just to get legal protection, which I'm pretty sure no longer exists now Eru is in charge. If you want this..." and he gestured to the ship. "It's yours."
"You're giving me Messenger?"
Vadim kicked him back, then. "No, you ass. I'm saying you're part of the crew. Part of the family." His tongue stole out to wet his lips, then. "You can even decorate. A bit. I have right of veto over ridiculous chintz."
"Kip, I could strangle you." Ithon was vaguely smiling, though.
"Come on. Come to bed. I wanna wipe off all your memories of that ass."
"Gladly."
***
[Ashroe: They would probably get married before they said 'I love you'.]
[Sianor: Ahaha. Yes, though.]
[Ashroe: You can say 'I love you' in a hundred million different ways.]
[Sianor: Apparently Kip says 'You can bring in cushions if you want'.]
[Ashroe: Ithon is honoured.]
[Sianor: So he should be!]
***
They didn't bump into anyone as they went back to their room, and Kip kept glancing behind to make sure Ithon was following. Ithon, who rolled his eyes every time Kip checked, and eventually just gave in and slapped his ass until he hurried.
That was probably thanks to Mes. She watched most things happening – some more passively than others – and he was sure she gently guided people to and away from places they needed to be or go. Still, best not to think about the fact that she knew every innermost relationship secret.
Inside the room Kip let Ithon close the door before he turned on him. He grabbed both his hips and pushed him back against the door, arching up onto the balls of his feet to kiss over his throat and jawline, working towards his lips.
"Kip..."
"Shh," he said, sliding his hands into the man's pockets to act as a counterpoint as he surged up. "Let me love you, damnit."
He didn't even know he'd used the 'L-word', too busy running a flat tongue over afternoon stubble. Warm hands slid into his hair, rubbing behind his ears and against his scalp. The rough touch made him growl in pleasure, and after a few little nipping bites he started to lick over Ithon's full, lower lip. Long, wet drags of his tongue and he felt one knee push between his legs. He parted his, so they each had a leg to rub against, frotting up against the door like horny kids.
To be fair, horny kids would likely have their hands in pants by now, right? Well. Kip would have. But he wanted to make sure Ithon understood, somehow, that it didn't matter. That Baudeline didn't matter. That it didn't change who he was, and his historical lapse in judgement and ethics hadn't tarnished his opinion of his lover. It really, really hadn't. He licked his tongue into Ithon's mouth, tasting his soft moans and gasps. He tasted of worry, underneath it all. Trust Ithon to panic about something he did ten years ago. (Not that Kip was any better.)
Vadim let his hands slide up out of his pockets and tug his shirt free, only to let his fingertips dance over his hips and waist. Ithon dropped his head backwards, exposing his throat as he groaned to the ceiling. His hands in Kip's hair guided him where he wanted the attention next, pressing him into his collarbone and rewarding his teeth and tongue with loudly appreciative groaning. Kip started to unfasten the front of his shirt, starting at his belly. He swiped thumbs over the little trail of hair leading down from his navel, knowing it by touch alone. When Ithon's noises calmed down enough he moved to wrap his lips over the arch of his throat sucking for all he was worth. The taller man howled at that, the reverberation travelling right through Kip's lips down his spine to his dick. He was going to mark him, and he didn't care if he wore high-neck shirts for a week to cover the pink mark he was going to leave.
Up and up his hands went as his mouth worked that swallowing column, his clever fingers spreading clothing wide like unwrapping a present all for him. Ithon's breathing was ragged and shot to hell, and he could feel the tremor in the hands pawing at his head. Ithon normally liked to give as good as he got, never taking too passive a role in their lovemaking. He didn't even think it was a need for dominance, so much as a need to please and to give back. Bu
t when his hands tried to move to undress Vadim, he growled at him until he stopped. He kept on growling until he got the picture and lay back, fingers back to combing over his temples, at the space behind his jaw.
"Kip..."
He huffed a response as he got the last buttons open, lifting from his throat only to slide a fuzzy cheek down over his bare chest. He rubbed against one dusky pink nipple until Ithon was whining, then turned his head to lap at it. He started out gently at first: little kitten-licks that became scraping teeth and then a full on lock around the nub, sucking until his cheeks hollowed and there was no air left in his mouth. His tongue laved the nipple wet, then flicked it hard. Not wanting to leave the other nipple bereft, he reached over to tweak and tug it as proud as he could. When Ithon's flailing got borderline too much he lifted his head to swap over. The momentary reprieve didn't seem to help because Ithon started to kick backwards at the door and curse loudly. Kip grinned and kept it up until there was a begging in with the moaning, and then he just pressed his thumbs against those nubs and kissed back up to the side of his mouth.