I couldn’t help but smile. “Pulled an all-nighter, huh? I’ve been pulling some all-nighters lately, too, but I’m sure it’s for entirely different reasons. Anyway, I was just going to let you know I’ll be moving out today and I won’t be able to take my furniture with me. It’s kind of old, but if you want it or know someone else who might want it, then it’s yours.”
“Seeing how I’ve been sleeping on the floor, that would be awesome.”
It was settled. I would be moving. I hadn’t accumulated much during the seven years I’d been on my own, and what I did have was nothing special. But somehow, it still sucked to know I was about to let go of my few possessions. The only bright side was that maybe a poor college kid would get some use out of it.
***
After a long day of moving furniture across the hall and stuffing the rest of my belongings in garbage bags and loading it into our cars, Pax and I finally made it back to Creekview. I had let the management company know I had vacated, and I’d given them Pax’s address and promised I would make good on what I owed them as soon as I could. I’d also called my boss to let her know I wouldn’t be back to the restaurant. She was the sweet, grandmotherly type who promised me that she understood my decision and wished me well on my new endeavors.
There was nothing left for me to do now but figure out how I was going to get my life back on track.
I pulled into a parking spot beside Pax, turned off the car, and glanced at Joseph, who was sleeping soundly in the back seat. “You ready to start a new life?” I asked in a whisper, flashbacks of my own childhood flitting through my mind. It was difficult to be back in Creekview without thinking about my mother. Everywhere I looked bore memories of the two of us together, and now that she was gone and I was pretty much alone, those memories were more painful than I cared to admit. “We’ll make new memories. Won’t we, Joseph?” I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, letting the Tennessee air fill my lungs. As I exhaled, my eyes fell back to Joseph. “Grandma would be so proud of you.”
He made sucking noises in response, but he didn’t wake.
A knock sounded on my window, and I jumped. I turned to see Pax standing outside my door, and I opened it in response. Grabbing my purse, I pulled the strap over my shoulder and got out of the car, looking at him expectantly as I pushed the door closed.
“Why don’t I get you and Joseph settled inside and I’ll unpack the car?”
“I can unpack it.”
“I’d rather you take care of Joseph while I unpack it.” He motioned toward the car where Joseph lay sleeping. “I’m not sure it’s good that the two of us come in contact.”
I rolled my eyes. “He’s a baby, not a poisonous snake.”
“He has sharp teeth and rattles. So they’re kind of the same thing.”
“Good grief,” I muttered as I walked around the car to Joseph’s door. I opened it and retrieved him. “Come on, baby,” I cooed as he stirred but then settled against my shoulder. My hand splayed across his back to steady him, and I kissed his sweat-dampened crown, wishing my air conditioner had worked well enough to keep up with the sweltering August heat.
Once I reached the sidewalk, Paxton turned and walked toward his apartment building. I followed him to his front door, pausing as I waited for him to slide the key in the lock. He opened the door and slid his hand across the width of it, pushing it open farther while he stood at the threshold, waiting for me to enter first.
Patting Joseph’s back, I stepped inside, the cool air flowing over me like a waterfall of relief. His apartment was small but tidy.
“Make yourself comfortable, and I’ll start unloading.” He closed the door behind him, leaving Joseph and me to roam his apartment, unattended.
Late afternoon sunlight filtered through the blinds, casting a striped golden pattern on the hardwood floor. His furnishings were simple with clean lines, and I sat in a camel-colored recliner, lightly rocking as my feet alternated between tapping against the floor and becoming airborne. Joseph seemed slightly restless, and I hoped to rock him back to sleep, so I could situate my things as Pax brought them in from the car.
After depositing a load, Pax disappeared back out the front door, and I laid Joseph on the couch while I opened his playpen and set it up in the corner behind the front door. It partially blocked the entrance to the kitchen, but since there was enough room to maneuver and there was really no other space to accommodate it, I figured it was the best spot for it.
I spread out a soft blanket and moved Joseph to the safety of the playpen, so I wouldn’t have to worry about him rolling off the couch.
Pax came back through the front door, carrying my suitcases. “Where are your keys?” he asked. “I’ll unload the stuff from your car.”
I handed him the keys. “All I need is the diaper bag from the backseat. Most of the stuff in the trunk is my winter clothes.”
As I glanced around at my few material possessions, I couldn’t stave off the melancholy that seeped into my soul. Twenty-five years of my life had been reduced to…not much.
I unpacked Joseph’s formula and snacks. Storage wasn’t a problem since Paxton’s cabinets were relatively empty. When Pax returned with the diaper bag, I refrigerated Joseph’s bottles and rejoined Paxton in the living room.
“I put your suitcases in the bedroom,” he said. “I’ll sleep on the couch until you can get things situated.”
“I know it’s tough having me invade your space. I just want you to know that I appreciate it.”
“Well, it won’t be forever.”
“No,” I agreed, “I’ll start looking for a job first thing in the morning. I’ll check at Mandy’s. Hopefully, they’ll be looking for a server.”
The sooner I could get out of Paxton’s apartment, the better.
I was afraid.
Loving someone who didn’t love me in return was a damn bitter pill to swallow, and I needed to get out before I remembered...before I remembered the way he made me feel when we were together, before I remembered what it felt like when he touched me, before I remembered how much he had once loved me.
I knew I still loved him, but I was afraid all those old emotions would rush back to the surface and I would want things to be the way they were before.
We could never go back, not because I didn’t want it, but because Pax swore that it was over between us.
And no matter how much I might wish otherwise, Pax would never forgive me for running to his brother after he ended our relationship.
Chapter 5
Endurance
Paxton
“Come on, you wuss. Stop bench pressing like a girl.”
Having just lowered the barbell to my chest, I struggled to lift the heavy ass bar in the air. Mason peered down at me, his usual grin plastered across his face. If I wasn’t so exhausted, I’d toss some smartass remark back at him, but I was concentrating on the weight. Sweat trickled down my forehead, and my muscles burned under the strain. With gritted teeth, I dug deep and somehow found the strength to slowly inch the weight upward until I had enough leverage to push the bar in the air.
Once I finally straightened my arms, I dropped the weight in the bar rack with a loud clanking. “Damn,” I huffed.
“No pain. No gain.” Mason stood over me and curled his hands around the bar.
I pushed myself into a seated position and turned sideways, opting to rest a minute before I got to my feet.
I rubbed my arm across my forehead to keep sweat from dripping in my eyes. “I don’t know about you, but I’ve had enough for one day.”
“Me, too. I’m fixing to hit the showers. Stormy wanted off a little early today to take her daughter to a birthday party, so I need to get to the bar.”
“Owning your own business is a lot of work, isn’t it?” I asked.
“Hell, yeah, but I wouldn’t want it any other way.” Mason flashed a smile, causing dimples to crease his cheeks. “Owning the bar with Lexi is, by far, the most rewarding job I’ve ev
er had. And I know Haley won’t be working there forever, but I like having her around, too.”
Mason stepped away from the weight bench and waited for me.
Pushing myself to my feet, I walked with him toward the shower. “I’m going to grab my bag and shower at home, so I’ll see you later.”
“All right, man.” Mason lifted his chin. “Later.”
I nodded my head in return and walked toward the front desk. Peeling off my weightlifting gloves, I tossed them in my duffel bag and turned toward Lizzie, who was on the phone. I waited for her to finish the call. “I’m heading out. You need anything before I go?”
“A good-looking man with a sweet disposition who has a job,” she said. “And a decent bank account,” she quickly added. “He doesn’t need to be rich, but it’d be nice if he could afford to take me to dinner every once in a while. And buy me some chocolates.”
“What is it with women and chocolate?”
“Chocolate makes everything better.” She pointed at me. “Even men.”
“I’ll keep that in mind the next time I’m trying to win over a woman.”
“You should,” she informed me. “I’ll bet my whole paycheck that buying chocolates will score you some major points.”
“I know how much you get paid,” I told her. “If you want me to take that bet, you’re going to have to come up with something more enticing than your paycheck.”
“Yeah, well, what can I say? My boss needs to give me a raise.” She leaned against the counter and crossed her arms over her chest. “Maybe you could mention that to him the next time you see him.”
“I’ll be sure and do that.” I scooped up the bag by the handles. “See you tomorrow.”
“Bye.”
As I pushed open the glass door that led to the parking lot, the summer heat stole my breath. I walked to the back row of the lot, where I’d parked before the first rays of the sun had sliced into the reigning darkness.
Tossing my bag over to the passenger seat, I climbed in and cranked the engine, turning my air conditioner knob to full blast and letting the air begin to cool before I closed my door. Aiming the vent at my face, I let the cold air wash over me as I contemplated going home.
Last night’s sleep had been interrupted by Joseph’s feedings. His shrill cries were impossible to escape in my tiny apartment, and I’d heard Jessica coo softly to him in an attempt to calm him while she waited for his bottle to warm.
Maybe I would have been smarter to stay in my office and take a nap before heading home.
On the drive to my apartment, I contemplated my conversation with Lizzie. She hinted at a raise, and while she was an excellent employee and most definitely deserved an increase in her salary, I didn’t know how I could possibly manage it. The gym had a decent membership. It had grown since the new customer service center on the edge of town had opened, but it still wasn’t making enough money to turn a huge profit.
The pressure was on to increase Flex Appeal’s income. Hell, I couldn’t afford to increase anyone’s salary, and that included mine, as well as my brothers’. Thankfully, neither Cade nor Evan complained, but if the three of us wanted to get ahead in life, we were going to have to do something to enhance our financial circumstances by either working together to improve the gym’s vitality or by each of us doing something for his own exclusive benefit.
I’d written a sample article for Muscles & Mayhem, one of the top magazines in the fitness world. The great thing about that particular magazine was that it wasn’t just about fitness. Mingled amidst the photos of ripped bodybuilders and the articles that gave helpful hints on how to achieve that look were a myriad of articles on a variety of topics, anything about life, really. And that was the beauty of it. I wouldn’t be limited to just fitness articles. Now all I had to do was keep my fingers crossed that they liked my writing well enough to actually pay for it.
When I arrived at my apartment, I pulled into the empty spot beside Jessica’s car. It seemed strange seeing it there, stranger still to know she was in my home. Not just her, but a baby, too. After turning off the ignition, I sat quietly, rubbing my face with my palms.
Damn. I didn’t know if I could withstand another night with a crying baby.
Reluctantly, I grabbed my duffel bag and headed inside.
When I walked in the living room and closed the door behind me, I paused. The house was quiet, and there was no sign of Jessica. I heard a clinking sound, and a moment later, Jessica appeared in the wide doorway that led to the kitchen. Her hair was neatly combed into a ponytail, and she was wiping her hands on a dishtowel.
The corners of her mouth tilted up slightly. “You’re home.”
I nodded, ignoring the thought that I actually liked someone noticing. I dropped my duffel bag by the front door.
“Tough day?”
“Not really.” I pointed toward the bathroom. “I’m going to grab a shower.”
“There wasn’t a whole lot to pick from in the fridge, but I did find enough stuff to make some omelets. It’ll be ready by the time you’re through.”
“I don’t expect you to cook for me.” Her eyes had shone like mosaic candle holders, the light catching all the blue nuances as it flickered, but I’d just blown out the flame. Her disappointment was palpable, and I felt bad. But I didn’t want her to get the wrong idea. Our arrangement was only temporary.
“I just wanted to do something for you since you were nice enough to let me stay here.”
Something in her voice made me unable to refuse her request. “Okay then.”
The flames were back, and she flashed a dazzling smile that mirrored their brilliance.
I turned and headed toward the shower, thinking it was a mistake to bring her here. When I walked into the bathroom, I froze. What the hell? Her panties had invaded my space, tiny scraps of fabric in an array of colors and patterns lined up along the curtain rod. I cursed softly as I looped my finger through a thin band of hot pink lace and lifted it. This was not conducive to my plans to keep everything on a strictly platonic level. Visions of her stretched out on my bed wearing nothing but the hot pink lace dangling from my finger filled my head. I blew out a breath, unable to keep the memories of us making love from assaulting me. I could remember it all: how soft her fingers were when they trailed down my chest and along my abs, the sensation of her hand closing over my length, my breath hitching at the sheer power she wielded over me. I’d been so damn in love with her. It had been terrifying at the time because I knew I’d do anything for her. She had owned me.
Completely.
I tried not to think of the way I’d felt when I’d learned she had turned to Cade. Hell, my relationship with Cade had only recently returned to any shade of normalcy from before. I couldn’t let my jealousy eat at my insides and stir it back up.
I fled from the bathroom, my finger curled around the band of her panties. She was standing over the stove, a spatula in her hand, her blue jeans clinging to a shapely ass. I forced my eyes to the back of her head. “Jess, you can’t leave these all over the house.”
She turned to look at me, her ponytail swaying with the movement. Her mouth dropped in surprise, and she laid the spatula against the edge of the skillet and flung herself toward me, grabbing the panties from my grasp. Color bloomed across her cheeks. “I…I’m sorry,” she stammered, clearly embarrassed. “I didn’t think you’d mind if I washed some clothes, and I don’t like to dry my….” She motioned to the panties. “I don’t like to dry these because I can’t afford to buy them very often, and I think they look better longer if they line dry.” She brushed past me. “They’re obviously dry now, so I’ll just grab them right quick.”
I watched her practically sprint toward the bathroom, a marathon runner getting that burst of energy when the finish line comes into sight. She was only in the bathroom about three seconds before she shot back out of it, carrying a wad of lace and silk and strings in her fist as she turned down the hall toward the bedroom.
&n
bsp; I didn’t wait for her to return to the living room. I slipped back into the bathroom and locked the door behind me, each of us probably welcoming the solitude.
After turning on the water and stepping into the shower, I yanked the curtain closed, trying not to remember the lineup of sexy lingerie that had hung like a beacon of lust. I turned the water as cold as it could go, willing myself not to have a reaction, willing myself not to remember.
After washing away the sweat from my workout and the memories that threatened to replay over and over in my mind like a scratched vinyl record, I toweled off. Hearing voices, I stilled, my head cocked in the best possible position for my ears to pick up the bits and pieces of conversation. Unfortunately, I couldn’t decipher any words. The voices grew louder, and I wrapped the towel around my waist and opened the door, walking into the hallway.
“How did you trick him into letting you stay here?”
I rolled my eyes. Rachel. I walked faster.
“I don’t know what you’re trying to imply,” Jessica said, her voice surprisingly even.
When I turned the corner, Rachel’s mouth was open, ready to flog Jessica with her words, no doubt.
“Rachel,” I called to her, keeping my voice pleasant in an attempt to defuse the situation.
Her eyes roved over my nakedness. Then, she pointed at Jessica. “Is this why, Paxton? Is she the reason you broke things off with me?”
Approaching her, I grasped her by the shoulders and turned her toward me in an attempt to draw her attention away from Jess. “Of course not.”
“Then why is she here?”
I squeezed her shoulders. “Why don’t you go outside and wait for me? I’ll grab some clothes, and I’ll be out there in a sec.”
Her eyes cut back over to Jess, and then, she looked at me again.
“You cheated on me.”
I lifted my palms in the air, completely baffled by her comment. “Hell, how can I cheat on you when we were never a couple?”
Betrayed (Whiskey Nights #4) Page 5