by Anna Hub
I breathed deeply, chuckling with him as the sickness passed.
“I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to that.” He cleared his throat.
“I’d prefer the berries, that’s for sure.” I scooped a handful of water to wash away the residue.
“I’m glad I met you, Sel.”
I lifted my head but he'd already look away. He'd shortened my name and it made me feel closer to him all of a sudden.
"That was the first time I've laughed in months."
I sat back on my legs. "Me too."
He met my gaze. "You gave me this knowledge I couldn't find for myself."
I blushed. "You're the one who told me to look for it."
"I guess we're a good team then."
"I guess." In so many ways he was a completely different person since his death. Despite the grey that had crossed his eyes, and that vacant expression on his face, he seemed warmer now. And rather than being a man I had no choice to spend this time with, he was actually a friend.
We waited hours until we were sure the berries weren't going to cause a reaction.
"We'd be better off cooking them if we had the option," I said.
"I've made plenty of campfires but never completely from scratch."
"Raw will have to do for now. I'll eat the berries first. At least if anything happens, my body is in the hospital and they can treat me.”
Brayden watched as I ate two and sat back. "How do you feel?"
"Okay so far. Give it a while longer."
He gathered sticks together. "Maybe I should try for a fire. We're going to need one eventually, right?"
He collected leaves and larger pieces of wood, then rubbed them together. I did the same but grew frustrated quickly.
“Maybe we need to do a bit more research on this one.” I turned to find Brayden determined, tongue poking out of his mouth in concentration as he twirled the stick.
I crossed my arms, disturbed by the redness building in his palms as he worked. "Don't hurt yourself. I'll just research it when I get back."
He was too transfixed to respond and I decided to hunt for berries rather than watch him rub his hands raw.
I returned to find Brayden with his back against a tree; his shadow stretched between his hands. I paused in my place as he motioned for me to wait.
He leaned forward, checking the forest on the valley slope.
I braced for the sound of a whip tail but instead, heard leaves crunching beneath feet in the distance. I stepped slowly, carefully tip-toeing on the moist ground before joining Brayden at the tree.
He turned. Grey pushed at the edges of his eyes.
At the bottom of the valley, a group of hunters fought against each other, their shadows slapping back and forth as they struggled to win. For what, I had no idea.
"Let's get out of here," Brayden whispered.
We moved further upstream and decided to camp near the water. The sun slowly disappeared and a cold wind rushed through the valley. Brayden suggested we find soft ground to dig a pit, so we could lie inside and shelter ourselves from the gusts.
I checked around nervously but Brayden was confident there were no hunters nearby.
"I've been seeing more of them lately," I said.
"That's just because we're on the move."
The ground was still moist beneath the surface from heavy rains the day before, but we dug until the hole was big enough for us to lie beside each other. Brayden collected leaves to line the inside and branches to rest on the top and block the wind.
We lay side by side, our heads still above ground and before long our body heat filled the pit. Despite being in the middle of a dangerous forest, I felt the most relaxed I'd ever been in this world. The idea of being stuck here with Brayden no longer seemed so awful. He wasn't such a bad guy after all.
"This whole situation makes you realise how we take our luxuries for granted," I mused.
"Like food?”
“That. And a bed.”
"Or a rack of lamb.”
“A hot shower.”
“Mash potato.”
“Well, it’s obvious you’re hungry.”
“Just wait until your body dies. You will be dreaming of pies and roast meat as well.”
I fell silent.
“Sorry.”
“It’s okay. I need to get used to it. I doubt I have much longer left.”
I felt wide awake, but in the dark forest there was nothing more to do. It seemed Brayden had the same problem and we both lay in silence with our eyes open watching the trees above.
It was the first time I'd nearly spent a full twenty-four hours in the shadow world. For a time, I was restless but as soon as Brayden fell asleep I felt lonely. It didn’t matter that he was right beside me because he was the only person in the world I had left. I just hoped he stayed the way he was now, and the short incidents with the grey eyes didn’t recur.
I tapped my foot against the soil, wondering if the shadows would still take me home without forcing it. Each time a tickle ran up my skin I thought I was passing. But it never came and gradually paranoia set in. I wondered if my body had died and my father was weeping over me. I waited to see if I was thirsty then I would know for sure. Eventually, I talked myself into being so thirsty that I nearly climbed out of the hollow. Then gradually my thoughts slowed and my eyes began to droop.
A snap woke me and my head spun as I sat up and searched for danger in the morning sun.
Brayden turned. “It’s alright. It was me.”
He'd only broken a stick to use for fire practice but it took time for me to calm down. I lay back, allowing my heartbeat to slow as images from my dream rushed back.
Brayden's lips had been moving against mine, soft and warm as his nose brushed against my cheek. My hands had been wrapped in his hair, the light curls tickling my fingers. I'd opened my eyes for a moment and found his own were staring back at me; grey and hollow as his lips clenched mine.
“You okay?”
I jumped. “Yeah fine. Just a weird a dream.”
Now his eyes were dark and he was still himself. But I knew the image would haunt me.
“I’ve been having dreams ever since this happened to me as well.”
I nodded and he turned away. Should I be most concerned that I'd dreamt about kissing him or that the grey had been in his eyes?
Chapter Fourteen
Brayden struggled with the wood and became frustrated by his inability to start the fire.
“Why don’t you wait until I’ve had the chance to research it? You could be doing it wrong.”
It was as though he hadn't even heard me, his hands red with effort as he rubbed the stick between them.
“Brayden?” I tried again but he only stared down. It was like watching someone who was paralysed trying to walk. His expression was far too intense for the work he was doing. I needed to stop him before he ripped the skin from his palms. I stepped closer and tried his name but he didn’t answer, so I placed a hand on his shoulder. A jerk travelled through his body, his head whipped around to see what had disturbed him—the grey was in his eyes. It was thick and frightening; his entire disposition changed. My own body convulsed in a moment of fear and I lost my balance. I fell to the ground and the morning sun cast my shadow and forced me back to my own world.
My heart still raced in the safety of my hospital bed. I turned the TV on to try and distract myself. The change in Brayden seemed to come without warning, only a short time before he'd spoken to me and everything was normal. I didn’t know what to think of it but at the same time, I was afraid to think about it too much.
It was a few minutes before I realised I'd been shifted to a new room, moonlight streaming in from what I guessed must be a window on the other side of the curtain. Someone shifted in their sheets and I groaned at the thought of sharing a room.
When a nurse walked in, I asked her if there was any way I could get access to the Internet.
“Not unless some
one brings it in for you. We don’t supply it.”
I nodded; unsure if I really wanted to know about starting a fire if it was going to make Brayden’s eyes turn grey again.
The nurse moved to the other side of the curtain and a soft voice spoke, “I have the Internet on my laptop. She can borrow it if she likes.”
“That’s a generous offer.” The nurse pulled the curtain back slightly. “Did you hear that? Alisha will let you use her computer.”
“That would be great.”
The nurse swung Alisha’s table around and I caught sight of the young woman in the next bed. She could only be nineteen at the most but she had a friendly smile. Sharing with her wouldn't be so bad.
It was easy to find information on lighting a fire but again most of it assumed you had flint or matches. When I finally found a site that explained three methods to do it without, I worked hard to commit them to memory.
The nurse returned. “Your father is here."
I sat up straighter and smiled as he walked in. He tucked his hand into mine. "Selena.” He leaned in and kissed my cheek.
The nurse wrapped a cuff around my arm. "Your doctor is on his way, he's been wanting to talk to you but it's hard to catch you awake."
I nodded, painfully aware that the time with my father was limited. The lines on his face looked a little deeper and his eyes were bloodshot. I could almost hear Brayden reminding me that it would be easier for him when I was gone. But had it been long enough for my father to transition?
I wished for a way to make this work, desperately fighting to stay here but unsure if I was doing him more harm than good. I closed my eyes, memorising the warmth of his hand on mine and before I had the chance to say anything else, the shadows stole me away.
Rather than landing on the rock ledge, I fell into freezing cold water with the sound of the fall rushing nearby. I crawled to the side and once again realised how lucky I was to land on something solid rather than being dropped from a height. Even if passing into the water wasn't ideal, at least it wasn't life threatening.
I lay down on the rocks to catch the sun. A gentle breeze was blowing over the forest, bringing with it the smell of nature. The red rocks sparkled in the light of the sun and the beauty of the shadow world hit me for the first time. I was trapped in the most beautiful place in the world but it would never be enough.
I tensed as rocks tumbled nearby and Brayden appeared beside the waterfall.
"You're wet," he said, his eyes brown once again.
"I've been moved to a different room in the hospital. This one landed me in the water at the top of the fall."
He sat beside me. “You have goose bumps.”
I rubbed a hand over my arm to chase them away while Brayden pulled his shadow from his waist and laid it over me. The warmth soothing.
“Is something wrong?” he asked.
I cleared my throat. “My father was at my bedside when I passed. I wanted a little longer with him.”
He lay beside me without saying a word and slipped his hand into mine. We lay in silence for a long time and gradually I managed to shake off my sadness.
I sat up and stretched the shadow, turning as Brayden made a noise. "I'm sorry. Did that hurt?" I dropped the shadow and Brayden flinched as it slapped back toward him.
He stood up and wrapped it around his waist once more. "No. It wasn't pain, it was just ..."
It was only the slight raise of his eyebrow that made me realise what he meant. When the blush appeared on my cheeks, he'd already turned and walked to the edge of the waterfall.
I’d known his shadow was now a living part of him and he felt pain through it. I just hadn’t considered that he might feel something else too.
“Shall we go grub hunting?” he asked.
We made our way to the descent path and Brayden climbed down first, keeping his back turned with his arms folded. It seemed he was deliberately trying to make up for the earlier incident by proving it was not his intention that caused me embarrassment.
As I landed on the ground behind him, his head turned back slightly with a cheeky smile on his lips.
I slapped his arm. “Keep walking.”
We crossed the river once more and Brayden walked in the front, leading us deeper into the forest. His head moved from side to side as he took in our surroundings. He seemed to move in a more strategic manner than he used to, stepping lightly on the balls of his feet, avoiding areas where his footsteps would make the most noise. I copied his actions, finding my own eyes were scanning the forest. When he stopped, I bumped into him and he turned an irritated glance toward me. His eyes weren’t as dark as they should be, the grey hugging his pupil like a fine mist. It was happening more often.
He closed his eyes and I could have sworn his nostrils twitched as he sucked air through them. Something was wrong. Even I could feel it. Without looking he reached behind and grabbed my hand, using it to push me in front and guide me in a new direction.
“Faster, Selena,” he whispered.
I couldn’t hear anything coming but wanted to run anyway. The forest thickened and became more difficult to move through as we picked up pace. Brayden's grip tightened and I froze just as a screech filled the air. I would never forget the sound of the wild cats hunting. A second scream rang out, reaching right inside my ears and sending a shot of pain through my head. Brayden didn't seem to feel it but his eyes suddenly widened and the grey burst through his pupils—completely taking over. I tried to step backwards but his hand tightened around mine, his lips mouthing the words, Don’t move.
The screech sounded again and the urge to run became stronger. A shiver ran up my spine as I remembered the agony of the whip lashing around my ankle. Brayden's head tilted to the side; his eyes fixed on mine as he listened. The whip cracked once more. This time, another scream filled the air—the scream of a victim. It had caught its prey.
The grey slowly disappeared from Brayden’s pupils as he relaxed. “Let's get out of here.".
I waited until we were far away and Brayden had released my hand before I spoke, “How did you know the cat was coming?”
“I heard it.”
“Well, I didn’t hear a thing.”
“It was pretty loud, Sel.”
“The screams, yes, but you knew something was happening long before I did.”
He shrugged. “Maybe I have better hearing than you.”
It was more than that. A pattern was emerging. His eyes always changed in response to some kind of danger. He seemed to lose a part of himself, as though it might make room for a more important mental function. Like it was based upon basic human instinct.
Brayden grabbed handfuls of berries while I rested by the water. I couldn’t shake away the anxiety from the cat attack but he seemed to have forgotten all about it. That idea in itself was unsettling. It was like he'd lost the capacity to feel fear anymore.
When we'd first met, it was his fear that stood out the most. He'd tried to mask it but every time there had been a sound in the forest I felt the tension blending between us. He'd spent many long fearful nights checking his surroundings frantically, but not anymore. The attack with the hunter had proved he wasn’t afraid to fight against them, which in itself was a sure sign he was different. But the cat was far more dangerous and seeing the way he reacted proved he wasn’t afraid of them either—not like he should be.
Then there was the fact that he’d barely mentioned his death. The first day he found out, he was clearly disturbed by it but he seemed to let it go far quicker than anyone should. Either that or he was really good at hiding it.
“Do you think the hunters talk to each other?” I wondered how things started out with them. Were these first few sightings of grey a sign he was eventually going to lose himself completely?
“No.”
“What makes you so sure?”
“I was being stalked by a man one day then a second happened to come across us. I thought they would work together to catch me. Instea
d, they turned on each other. I escaped while they were fighting.”
“Like they were yesterday?”
“Exactly. I've never seen them work together. They're always alone.” He sat beside me.
“Do you think they were like us once?”
Brayden stopped and took in my expression. “We’re nothing like them.”
I nodded and picked a leaf apart with my fingers. “I researched how to make a fire.” I'd been afraid to mention it earlier but now I wanted to test him. “The hand drill, which is what we were trying, only works if there is low humidity and low rainfall.”
Brayden turned with his eyebrows raised.
“Maybe that’s why it was so difficult. It's rained a lot recently. There's another method called the fire plough. You need to use a soft wood base which has a groove cut in the centre.” I drew a mark in the sand to show him what I meant. “Then using hard wood, you plough through. As you push it, tinder is shaved free and eventually the friction will cause it to light.”
He nodded as though it was all the description he needed.
“I don’t know the difference between hard wood and soft wood but I thought since you were a carpenter, you would know.”
As afternoon settled in, the wind rushed through the valley once again. It seemed for most of the day it provided shelter but before the sun set, the gales blew cold.
“Do you think it would be warmer by the rocks?” I asked.
“Maybe. But I don’t like being trapped up there. The river corners us by the cliff face and up on the rocks there is no quick escape.”
“There doesn’t seem to be as much of a threat up there though. I mean the hunters can still get to us but there are more animals down here.”
He dug into the ground, pulling worms free and collecting them in a bundle using his shadow.
I waited for a response but it wasn’t forthcoming. “Brayden?”
He sighed. “The cats can climb, Selena.”