When we came to the administration building at the end of the lake I realized that I must have run at least six miles, yet I didn’t feel at all tired‑more exhilarated than anything else.
I appreciated the rows of tall trees surrounding this building. Then I saw, coming out of its central entrance, the smallest man I had yet encountered in 2150. He was no more than six feet tall, and as we approached him I noticed signs of aging. Rana had looked 45, but this man looked at least 55. As we stopped before him, Carol took his left hand and greeted him affectionately.
He then greeted me in this traditional manner saying, “Welcome to Delta 927. I’m Hugo, your Deltar.”
I liked him immediately and was not surprised that the Delta had chosen him as their leader, for he had tremendous warmth and quiet strength: “Thank you,” I said, “I can’t tell you how happy I am to be here.”
Carol told him of our journey around the Delta lake, then he answered my unspoken question about his age.
“I have had 197 years,” he explained. “I was born in Brazil in 1953. Yes, I could look younger, but I grew up in a time when people aged and, since I shall soon evolate, I have permitted myself to age also.”
“You mean you’re planning on dying?” I asked with surprise. I remembered that C.I. had once told me that when Macro society members decide that they have learned all they can in any particular incarnation, they break the connection between their astral and physical bodies, causing the latter to die, while the soul is then free to evolve to the next level on the m‑M continuum. They called this process evolation.
Suicide meant running away from the past; evolation‑ contraction of evolve and graduation‑meant embracing the future.
“Yes, I want to join my twin souls in another dimension,” he answered. “Besides, I’ve accomplished all I can in this lifetime, so it’s time to move on.”
He laughed at my uncertain expression and continued, saying, “You don’t need to worry, Jon. I’m not planning on evolating immediately. In fact, it will be some months yet before my successor is chosen, and, of course, I couldn’t leave until the new Deltar is ready to take over.”
I told him that I hoped I would see him again in this life. Then we continued our run.
Along the other side of the lake I noticed that there were more people swimming and playing on the beaches. Carol explained that mid‑afternoon was the favorite time for outdoor recreation. She asked if I wanted to speed up our journey in order to join Neal and Jean sooner.
I replied, “How much faster can we run?”
“Lots faster,” she replied. “Just think lightly and swiftly.”
We did and veered from the lakeshore to the less populated park area behind the Gammas. Our running soon became very close to a form of low flying. I don’t know how fast we were going, but in an incredibly short time we had completed the full circle of the lake and arrived at the third triad’s recreation area. Less than an hour had passed since we started our run and, while I now felt some fatigue, I was not at all uncomfortable. In fact, after waiting a few minutes while Neal and Jean finished playing soccer, we resumed our tennis game‑this time with the stipulation that the first set would be played without the use of PK.
Without PK Jean and I won the first set, but just barely. Then, in the next two sets, in which we used our PK, I was pleased that while we lost, it was much closer than it had been the day before. I was making progress even faster than I had hoped.
After tennis we again took a dip followed by a fascinating and very complex game, similar to three‑dimensional chess, which was played as a team sport. Because of my inexperience in this game Carol and I played the two children, and again I was amazed at the remarkable intelligence of these two 7‑year‑olds. They beat us three straight games, but at least by the last game I was catching on to some of its intricate complexities and we came very close to winning.
Then it was time to return to our Gammas and our individual Alphas for the Macro dance. Again we were running, but this time with Jean by my side and Neal just ahead of Carol. Never had I seen children run so swiftly. I was sure that these 7‑year‑olds could easily break every track record of my 20th century. We waved goodbye at the entrance to our Gamma, and as we made our way to our respective Alphas there were telepathic reminders of what we would do together tomorrow:
Back in our Alpha I was soon engaged for the second time in the energetic and delightful combination of ballet, folk dancing, and gymnastics called the Macro dance. The exciting musical accompaniment was supplied by C.I. through a speaker system so designed that the music seemed to emanate equally from all parts of the room. With my growing telepathic skills I was able to keep up with more of the flashing ins and outs and other dazzlingly swift interactions of the others in the room. I was no longer surprised to find Joyce on my shoulders or Alan throwing me in the air, or the tumbling over and under each other that occurred so regularly. Utilizing our telepathic bond I knew what was coming and was more or less prepared to accept what I had at first thought were impossible physical gyrations for the human body.
While my first experience with the Macro dance had left me bewildered and doubting the evidence presented by my own eyes, I was now prepared to accept the Macro powers as non‑miraculous, though thrilling and surprising. However, the day’s demands on my PK had been strenuous, so after about fifteen minutes I found myself very tired and grateful that my Alpha had ended the dancing early in deference to my fatigue.
I was soon floating comfortably in our Beta swimming pool perfectly content to just watch the energetic water activities of the other 99 members of my Beta. There was no doubt in my mind that I was viewing the greatest athletes the human race had ever produced, and I Was sure that my comrades had reached the limits of, physical grace, dexterity, and superhuman stamina. A few couples were playfully making love as they enjoyed the rhythm of the moving waters supporting their united bodies. Carol dove underwater and as her wet breasts found their way up my thighs to my chest her legs wrapped around me and we joined together joyously. Appreciating the uninhibited joy of love expressed openly and freely, I made a mental note to apologize to Karl and Cindy.
Before we left the pool, Leo our Betar, organized a type of water ballet, a game that was breathtaking to watch.
I vowed that tomorrow I would become a part of this activity, too.
After dinner I listened to my Alpha do some magnificent singing and discovered that Nancy and Steve had voices that would have been the envy of our greatest opera singers of the 20th century. To provide musical accompaniment they merely had to ask C.I. to give them whatever they wished in the line of music, since C.I. had recordings of every imaginable kind. Carol explained to me that they ended most evening meals with song, and it was only because of my arrival and our lengthy conversations that I had not heard them sing until tonight.
I could have listened to them sing all night and even discovered I was able, with the aid of telepathy, to join in some of the songs. However, long before I was ready to end it, Alan was saying that it was time for tutoring and I was leaving for my visit with Rana. I was pleased that we would be meeting with her this evening since I planned to ask her to use all her Macro power to help me attain my third Macro contact.
Rana immediately picked up this intention of mine, or perhaps she had precognitively anticipated it, because she asked me how I thought she could help me attain Macro contact.
“Well I‑I‑don’t know,” I answered, feeling rather surprised at her question. “But, after all, you are a level ten and if anyone should know how to help me, you should.”
“Yes,” Rana replied, “but last time we met I told you that it is desire and belief that determine all things. No one can give you these two essentials.”
“All right,” I said, “but I thought if I could establish a strong telepathic bond with you, that when you establish Macro contact I would be able to make it more easily myself.”
Rana shook her head. “It won�
��t work with you and me because our soul notes are too dissimilar. However, it might work with Lea if you could completely eliminate all resistance. But, once again, we’re back to desire and belief.
Even telepathically connected to Lea you would fail to attain Macro contact if you didn’t have sufficient desire and belief. What’s more, you would then interfere with your twin soul attaining Macro contact. Of course, since Lea has been using her Macro powers to maintain your time‑space translation she has not been able to attain Macro contact at all.”
Perceiving my thoughts Rana said, “No, Jon, there is no easy way. At least none that I know of, and I spent many lifetimes looking for them rather than accepting the responsibility for my own personal growth or lack thereof.”
I didn’t remember much of what happened during the rest of our meeting with Rana. I was a little embarrassed and more than a little disappointed.
Later that evening as I was ready to go to sleep I realized that ever since Rana had told me that she couldn’t help me the way I wanted to be helped I had been in a fog of depression. Carol, of course, picked up on this and said something about all depression being the product of repression.
I wasn’t really listening very closely for my mind was again wrestling with the seemingly impossible task of attaining level three in just three months.
Once again I failed to attain Macro contact, which so frustrated me that I then failed at attaining Macro immersion.
I lay awake for a long time thinking of my failures and the task before me.
CHAPTER 13: LOSS
I haven’t written in this journal for almost two months. During this period my life has been filled with more failures and successes than in all my previous years put together. I was going to say that I have been too busy to write it all down, but I know that’s only partially true. The truth is that I didn’t want to write down all my failures, only my successes. Unfortunately, my conscience wouldn’t let me write about one without mentioning the other. Finally this same conscience insisted that I bring this journal up to date. With only a month left to attain level‑three awareness it should prove helpful to me to review the past two months.
My problems, just like everyone else’s, have been caused by my refusal to accept the macrocosmic truth that all failure leads to success and that all success leads to failure‑that is, to another lesson we have not yet learned. So I’ll begin with a success that became a failure.
It has to do with my relationship with Neda and my desire to change her life from unloved ugliness to at least a minimum of enjoyable attractiveness.
I had Karl, with the help of one of his girlfriends, buy Neda some new clothes and provide her with enough of our research data to keep her busy typing. Meanwhile, I worked on her with the Macro powers of telepathy and PK.
I continued to bombard her mind with positive accepting thoughts which kept her happy and hopeful regarding the future. In fact, during the first month of my Neda project I spent almost all my waking hours in 1976 focusing my mind on her; not only sending positive reinforcing thoughts, but also suggestions as to what she should eat, what exercises she should perform. I was determined to improve her physical appearance as soon as possible, and I knew PK, the power used in all healing, could not be expected to do all the work needed.
I was pleasantly surprised, though, at how much PK could accomplish if carefully directed and applied to the gland and nerve centers of the body. I spent some part of every day back in 2150 learning from C.I. the seemingly miraculous emental healing and growth principles discovered by Macro society research.
I learned that the mind and the emotions direct the formation of our physical body and all the changes that occur within it. C.I. described this process as an automatic reflex called the cellular response, with every cell of our being faithfully playing the part prescribed for it by our mind and emotions.
With the help of C.I. and this new information I began to use my growing PK power, my mind, and my emotions to change Neda’s physical structure and to stimulate within her a joyous cellular response. This created an inner beauty while PK created the outer beauty.
My progress at first was extremely slow, and I was becoming discouraged and doubtful that even three months would be enough to make any significant changes in Neda’s facial appearance. But then, toward the end of the fourth week, I developed the clairvoyant ability to see not only her aura but all seven glandular systems and every nerve network in her body. Now I could see clearly how to direct my PK force and also the immediate results of my efforts. From that day on, my progress became so rapid that Karl went around shaking his head and muttering to himself. By the end of the fifth week I was finished with the physical transformation of Neda.
She had been five feet eight inches tall. She was now five feet ten. She had weighed 105 pounds. Now she weighed 150 pounds of sensational curvaceous female flesh. I had modeled her as a composite of Lea, Carol, and Diane of my Alpha. While I could not quite reach their perfection, I had succeeded beyond my most optimistic hopes. As for Karl, my success was almost too much. A couple of evenings after I had completed my work with Neda, he came back from one of his ever‑longer visits to her apartment demanding a talk with me.
“I have no more doubts about your incredible Macro powers or about your Macro society of 2150, but do you really know what you’ve done to Neda?”
“What do you mean?” I asked. “You know what I’ve done. I’ve taken a physical and psychological disaster and turned it into a victory for beauty and tranquillity.”
“As for her physical beauty,” Karl replied, “I could not possibly have any complaints. My God, how you managed to change that face, nose and all, into this delicately lovely one I’ll never be able to comprehend. She’s a pure joy to look at. I have to drag myself away from her.” Having picked up his thoughts, I broke in, “But you’re not happy with her psychological transformation.”
Karl gave me a long questioning look before saying, “I don’t understand you, Jon. Don’t you realize that she is not only your physical creation but also your mental one? She thinks only what you want her to think, and you won’t permit her a very wide range of thoughts. For instance, you deny her the right to have any doubts or concerns about the future.”
“Wait a minute,, Karl,” I interrupted. “What’s wrong with helping her feel confident about her future?”
“Damnation, Joni” He exploded. “She’s not a puppet, even though you seem to think you’re her puppet master. She has a right to develop her own strength by making her own mistakes.
“You’re like the over‑possessive parent who won’t permit his child to make any mistakes‑all so the parent won’t have to feel uncomfortable. And what’s the result? You know as well as I that when a child isn’t permitted to learn how to cope with the problems of this micro world he becomes angrily dependent on the parent and totally lacking in self‑esteem. Good Lord, Jon. After all our months of research, nobody knows that better than we do!
“You rescued her from one stinking, lousy, miserable parent relationship and put her right back into another, with you as the parent!”
At first I was hurt and angry that Karl couldn’t appreciate my great and unselfish work with Neda. I sent a telepathic command to Neda to come to our apartment so that she could help me refute Karl’s accusation. By this time I had so attuned Neda’s mind to mine that I was confident she would soon be with us. My one disappointment was that I had not been able to develop any Macro powers in Neda, for while she would respond to my telepathic suggestions she didn’t recognize them as coming from me, so true telepathic communication between us had been impossible.
As I waited for Neda to join us I tried to be as fair as I could in considering Karl’s accusation. It was possible, I thought, that perhaps I had gone a little too far with my desire to protect Neda from unhappiness. But surely I wasn’t treating her like a puppet. I felt that this accusation was over‑dramatized and exaggerated. Particularly after all
I had done for Neda. I decided to tell Karl about some of my other selfless Macro activities.
“Karl,” I said, “last week I went to our university hospital and successfully practiced my PK healing powers on two cases of terminal cancer. Unaware of my efforts, they underwent surgery‑mostly because they would rather take the chance of dying swiftly under the surgeon’s knife than slowly under the attack of cancer. Guess what? Two miraculous. recoveries. However, some of the skeptical medics are now claiming that their tests must have been wrong because no one could completely recover from that much cancer so soon.”
Karl shook his head slowly and gave me a weary smile. “You’re trying to convince me that you only do good for others. I suppose you feel there is no disease you can’t cure with your Macro powers.”
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