Kyousuke took a firm hold so that she would not drop it. It was heavier than he would have guessed. It must have weighed heavy in her arms and on her heart.
“…Th-thank you.”
“I should thank you! Ah, now at last I am prepared to meet my certain death… Adieu, Kyousuke darling. If by chance we meet again, please embrace me with all your strength! That alone will be enough, so—”
Wham!
The case sailed through the air. The handmade lunch box, knocked from Kyousuke’s grasp, fell to the floor, spilling its magnificent contents everywhere.
“”
Shamaya froze. Kyousuke held his breath.
It had been so sudden. They did not understand what had happened.
The lunch box was a wreck of scattered sandwiches and side dishes.
Kyousuke and Shamaya stared, unmoving.
“Good grief! Don’t let her fool you, big brother. Miss Bitch here is the infamous Killer Queen, after all. Another moment more and you could have died! What would we do if it was full of poison or something? Sheesh…it’s dangerous, dangerous!”
Sighing, Ayaka wiped away cold sweat.
She had cut in from the side and thrown the case over.
“What are you…”
“I told you before! I protected you from Miss Bitch’s evil influence. You should be more careful, big brother!” Ayaka glared at Kyousuke indignantly. “Even with a beautiful girl…if you’re careless, that’s when you’ll die, just like that! Do you understand?!”
“Th-there’s no way that such a thing—”
A groan escaped from Shamaya’s mouth. “……not…said…”
“What?”
At the same time that Ayaka looked in her direction, Shamaya also looked up at her. “It is not filled with poison or anything! As I said before, there was one subtle seasoning that I used in my cooking. It was nothing but love and XXX!”
…Just then, didn’t she add some dangerous word after “love”?
“Hang on!” Ayaka closed in on Shamaya. “Don’t put your weird ingredients in food you’re going to give to my big brother! That in itself is a poison, isn’t it? If he ate food polluted by your love, my big brother would be polluted just the same! You stupid bitch!”
“S-stupid bi…why…you! How dare you speak to me in such a way?! And after ruining the meal that I worked so hard to prepare?! I tolerated you before because you are my darling Kyousuke’s younger sister, but you have reached the very limit of my patience! Now I’m angry… I demand an apology, Miss Ayaka!”
“Absolutely not. You should be the one apologizing.”
“Whaaat?! Why ever should I apologize?!”
“Because you tried to poison my big brother! Why are you playing dumb?”
“I am not playing dumb! There is not the slightest bit of poison—”
“Then you eat it.”
“……Wha?”
Pointing at the lunch box, which still sat upended on the floor, Ayaka smiled cheerfully. “Let me see you eat it yourself. And then if nothing happens to you, I’ll admit that it’s not poisoned. I’ll admit that you weren’t trying to kill my big brother.”
The expression disappeared from Shamaya’s face. “…Put that food in my mouth, you say?”
“That’s right. It got a little dirty, but it was filthy with your love to begin with, so it’s all the same, isn’t it? Unless, as we thought, it’s got poison in it—is that why you won’t eat it?”
“”
The light disappeared from Shamaya’s eyes. As Ayaka snickered with laughter, she took a step closer. “I understand.”
“……Eh?”
“If such an indignity will clear my name, I shall do it gladly! Between my love for Kyousuke and my silly pride…there is no contest!” Shamaya knelt, pinching her skirt behind her knees and tucking her honey-colored hair behind her ear. Without hesitation, she picked up a piece of fried chicken. As Ayaka watched, astonished, she daintily brushed away some of the dirt. “Well, then, here I go—”
“I’ll take that.”
—Yoink. A hand reach down from above and snatched the fried chicken.
“Aaah?!” Shamaya and Ayaka shouted in unison as the thief sampled the stolen chicken.
“Oh, that’s good.”
“……Kyousuke…darling?”
Shamaya was frozen in shock.
Kyousuke grinned as he finished eating. “You’re a really good cook, eh? That was delicious, even cold. Thank you so much for the food!”
“Kyo-Kyousuke darling…I thought you hated me?”
“I don’t hate you! I was trying to tell you that, but…we left off at a weird place last time, I know, and it caused a bit of a misunderstanding. I’m really sorry. Oh, and also, my sister is—”
“Think nothing of it!” Shamaya interrupted. “You don’t need to apologize.” She got to her feet. “Just hearing you call my cooking delicious…and saying that you don’t hate me…is more than more than enough. Oh-ho-ho!” Raising a hand to her chest, Shamaya wore a joyful expression. It was the look of a maiden in love, hardly appropriate for the Killer Queen.
“Miss Shamaya…”
Despite his better judgment, Kyousuke was charmed.
“”
Throughout their conversation, Ayaka had been standing, head hung low, wearing an expression that said that at any moment she could explode into violence…
If that happened, there was no way Kyousuke could take Ayaka’s side.
Shamaya collected her case and left, saying, “I’ve been summoned to the discipline room.”
Before cleaning up the food that was on the floor, Kyousuke turned to face Ayaka. She had kept her mouth shut to the end, even after Shamaya had left the room, and still stood there, head hanging low.
“…Hey, Ayaka.” Kyousuke had planned to hold back, but he couldn’t stop himself from speaking in a serious tone. “No matter how you look at it, you said too much, you went too far. I understand that you’re angry and suspicious because everyone here is a murderer, but you need to be a little more…ummm…there’s a problem with how you say things. That kind of abuse would make anyone feel angry and hurt. They may be murderers, but they’re people just like us. Do you understand, Ayaka?”
“”
Ayaka did not respond.
Annoyance rose within Kyousuke. He put his hands on both her shoulders, and spoke sternly. “It’s not just Miss Shamaya… You act like this toward Eiri and Maina, too. I understand feeling uneasy when you’ve been thrown into a place like this. I also understand how hard it is to trust a murderer. And I understand that it really bothers you when I get along with people like that. But listen, Ayaka. If you keep acting so hostile, you’ll provoke a response from the people around you…and sooner or later no one is going to come near you! You’ll be just like I was on the outside—”
“…un…sta…any…”
“Huh?”
“Big brother, you don’t understand anything!”
Ayaka brushed Kyousuke’s hands away. Her voice was shrill as she continued hysterically. “The reasons why I feel uneasy, and the reasons I can’t start liking those people, and the reasons why I’m angry, every one of them! You don’t understand anything, even the tiniest biiiiiiiiiiiit!!” Ayaka screamed, clawing at her hair. She looked like a child throwing a temper tantrum.
Kyousuke honestly had no idea what was making her so upset, and was getting frustrated. I’ve been with her this whole time, but… The answer remained just beyond his grasp. “I don’t get it, Ayaka! I don’t understand why you’re so angry! Can’t you just explain it to me clearly? If you tell me, maybe I can—”
“So if I don’t tell you, you won’t understand?” Ayaka looked at Kyousuke with disappointment in her eyes. “…Fine, then.” Sulking, she turned away in a huff.
Kyousuke finally threw down his hands in exasperation. “What do you mean by ‘fine’?! If you have something you want to say, you should say it.”
“No.�
��
“…Say it.”
“No!”
“Say it, I said!”
“No way.”
“I told you to say it!!”
“No waaay!”
Kyousuke obstinately repeated the demand, and Ayaka stubbornly refused to answer. The two of them stood glaring at each other, before a hand pushed them apart.
“You two are getting too intense.”
“……”
Catching both their gazes, Eiri continued quietly.
“First of all, how about you take this somewhere else? Fighting like this, out in the open—you’re bothering everyone around you! Let’s clean up the food on the floor and then go somewhere else. You two can take the time to compose yourselves a little—”
“Who asked yoooooooooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu?!”
Ayaka pushed Eiri away with all her strength.
“Kyah?!”
Eiri lost her balance. She fell, pulling over a desk in the process. Textbooks and notebooks scattered everywhere. For several long seconds, her mind stopped. “You’re way too strong… You really are Kyousuke’s little sister.”
“Eiri!” Kyousuke ran over to her. “Are you okay?!”
“…I’m fine,” Eiri answered. “I was just a bit startled.”
She sat up and glared at her aggressor. “Hey, Ayaka…don’t you know the difference between right and wrong?”
Her voice was surprisingly soft.
“That’s my line!” Ayaka responded defiantly. “He was taking your side again! Does my big brother really like you that much? He’s got terrible taste—you’re dumb, you’ve got a flat chest, and you can’t cook. A stinky sow who only gets by on her looks… What is he—”
“Ayaka!” Kyousuke shouted.
“……?!”
Ayaka cowered, looking frightened and bewildered. “B-big brother…?”
Kyousuke could feel guilt stir in his chest as his sister peered up at him with quivering eyes. But letting Ayaka off the hook now wouldn’t do her any good, he reminded himself, stoking his anger. “It doesn’t matter whose side I’m taking or not taking! I’m angry because you did something cruel.”
“……”
“Now apologize.”
“…………”
“A single word is fine. Apologize to Eiri, Ayaka.”
“………………”
“Hey, how long are you going to stay silent?”
“……………………”
“Apologize!”
Kyousuke shouted again, causing Ayaka’s eyes to fill with tears.
Large teardrops fell from her wide eyes.
Steeling himself against the heartache, Kyousuke continued to stare at his sister. She turned her face away, trying to escape his gaze. Wiping her tears, she let out a sob: “B-big brotheeeeeer…”
Kyousuke did not respond.
“Big brotheeeeeeeeerrrr…uuuuuu…”
She sobbed like she was seeking salvation. But Kyousuke did not save her.
Desperately battling the urge to forgive his sister, Kyousuke continued to stare silently at her.
“Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu…” Curling into a ball, Ayaka sobbed and moaned. Her wailing ground away at Kyousuke’s heart.
“”
Then, the next instant, it abruptly stopped, replaced by the faintest whisper.
“……Wrong.”
“Huh?”
“Wrong…wrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrong, wrong!”
Ayaka shook her head madly, disheveling her hair. Her unfocused eyes seemed to look in different directions.
“Big brother would never say such things… The big brother that Ayaka knows would never be so cruel to her! That’s right, he’s acting really weird… Ayaka’s big brother was always on her side, he protected her, he helped her, he was kind to her, he loved her, but this…this is wrong! Absolutely, completely wrong! This…this isn’t the big brother…the big brother that Ayaka knows, this…isn’t him…”
“…Huh? What are you saying—”
“Don’t touch meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!”
Pushing away Kyousuke’s extended hand, Ayaka hollered and backed away. After she had put some distance between them, she gazed at him with upturned eyes.
“……Aya…ka?”
The blatant hostility in his little sister’s piercing eyes was enough to shake him.
—Don’t touch me. Ayaka’s words stuck in his chest, and he couldn’t breathe. His mind went blank.
“……?!”
Kyousuke watched, dumbfounded, as Ayaka turned and ran off wildly.
Wait, please! he tried to cry out, but the words stuck in his throat. In an instant, Ayaka had slipped past Kyousuke’s side, crossed before Eiri’s eyes, left Maina behind in the classroom, and—
“C’mon, everyone! What are you waiting for, come to the cafeteria—Uwaah?!”
—crashed right into the gas mask that had appeared on the other side of the sliding door, before running off down the hall as fast as her legs could carry her. The sound of her footsteps quickly faded in the distance.
“Owwwwww…what the hell was that? That would have been dangerous if I didn’t have my famous boob cushions to protect me! Didn’t you learn not to run in the hallway?! Geez…wait, what? Why are you sitting there, Eiri? Your underpants are showing. And what’s with the big mess, and all the noise, and…huh? Where’s Ayaka?”
Renko, the only one who didn’t understand the situation, tilted her head obliviously.
Thirty minutes had passed since the start of the lunch break.
May I Give You Hell?
FADE TO BLACK
SELF-QUESTIONING
The world is nothing but garbage, thought Ayaka Kamiya.
While watching the morning news, while walking through a crowded neighborhood, while listening to a trendy pop song, while having silly conversations with her classmates, while diligently studying, while turning down a friend’s invitation, while wearing an approachable smile, she laughed in her mind: Ah, this is really stupid.
These feelings had been triggered five years ago—when she was a third-year elementary school student—by malicious, class-wide bullying. The motives behind the bullying were unclear. There may have been no reason to it at all.
Compared to her classmates, Ayaka was prettier, her grades were better, she was more popular with boys, and her teachers liked her best. Her “flawless perfection” might have earned her the ire of her classmates (mainly the girls). Maybe they wanted to revel in the spiteful joy of watching perfect Ayaka stumble and fall.
Just before the bullying had started, Ayaka had turned down a love confession from the most popular boy in her class. The most popular girl in their class liked him. (She was loud and confident and a show-off—the exact opposite of Ayaka. They weren’t friends or enemies, though.)—Ayaka thought she’d heard that story, but couldn’t remember. She really didn’t know who had started it.
She only realized what was going on when her hallway slippers went missing… Afterward, Ayaka became an outcast. Girls who she had thought were her friends threw her gym uniform in the toilet and treated her like a stranger the next day. Girls who she had thought were her best friends gradually stopped spending time with her, and soon ostracized her as well. Afraid of upsetting the other girls, the boys did nothing, and some even supported the bullying, hoping to look favorable to those girls. The teachers pretended to know nothing and to see nothing.
There was no one on Ayaka’s side.
Despite all that, at home Ayaka carried on as she always had, wearing a smile on her face. With her whole heart she wished that she would not cause her family too much worry, but at the same time she was living in constant fear. If they knew that Ayaka was being bullied, her papa, and mama, and big brother…it might change how they looked at her, she thought, just like the people at school.
And then one morning about two months after the bullying had started, Kyousuke, who had been in fifth grade then, burst into the third grade classroom. Ayaka had been cleaning graffiti off her desk, in socked feet because she didn’t have slippers anymore.
“All of you, look at me!” Kyousuke had shouted. Before the teachers could intervene, he had cornered several of Ayaka’s classmates, demanding to know who had made his little sister cry.
After that, the bullying against Ayaka died down. Some people resented Kyousuke and went looking for revenge, but it seemed like he made every one of them cry. The sixth graders were no problem, and even their friends in middle school saw the tables turned when they tried to get their revenge. No one in Ayaka’s elementary school could stand up to Kyousuke.
No one wanted anything at all to do with Ayaka or her brother.
…However, Ayaka didn’t mind.
In her eyes, her brother was not a violent outlaw; he was her hero and her savior. She became even more emotionally attached to Kyousuke than before, and the two of them began spending more and more time together.
Rumors about Kyousuke had spread even outside of school, and they often ran into trouble, but whenever that happened her big brother always protected her. Time and time again, he was there to rescue her.
That’s why she didn’t mind it being just the two of them—no, she thought it was for the best, even. Kyousuke’s lonely little sister wanted him, and Ayaka’s solitary older brother needed her. They were happy like that. Their world was complete, and they didn’t need anything—or anyone—else.
When she moved to a private middle school, Ayaka attracted a lot of friends, but they were only superficial relationships. They were nothing more than lubricant to make her school life go by smoothly. She didn’t get deeply involved with anyone, and no one got deeply involved with her.
Murder Maiden and the Fatal Final Page 14