“We could leave soon if you want,” The Mourning Dove offered.
“We can leave when you are well. I have waited for over thirty years another few days will not make a difference.”
~
Molly was so unselfish. The Mourning Dove could see what Philip loved about her. She could see that the years had been good to her in spite of the difficult life. She had soft features and looked much younger than her years.
~42~
The Seeds of Hope
Within a few days they were on their way to Boston. Molly had a wagon filled with supplies for the long trip. She had given The Mourning Dove and Sparrow Song some clothes to wear for their travels. They would be less conspicuous this way.
Sparrow Song loved her new outfit. She twirled around in the full skirt. She did not seem to mind the confinement of this new attire.
The Mourning Dove stood in front of the large mirror in the bedroom of Molly after she had dressed. She turned as she pulled on her clothes. She stared for a moment as she witnessed the metamorphosis of the Crow woman returning to Rebecca Butler. She was as uncomfortable in the clothes as she was the role she had abandoned so long ago.
“How does it feel?” Molly asked sensing the discomfort.
“Honestly?” The Mourning Dove answered with a question not sure Molly would really want to know.
Molly nodded.
“It feels as though I am attending a costume ball,” she said as she pulled at the vest, which fit her snuggly around the bosom and waist. She snickered not wanting to offend her new confidant.
“I understand,” Molly laughed. “I think your way of dress was much more comfortable and practical.”
She took a straw hat from a rack in her room. She offered it to The Mourning Dove.
“Here, just a final touch,” she said as she handed her the hat.
Swift Fox Who Enters Quickly would not concede to the white man’s clothes. He stayed in his soft, comfortable animal skin. He did not care what others thought. He also felt that he could handle any obstacle.
He entered the house as the women were finished dressing. He looked on with disapproval. He felt betrayed as he scoffed at his sister’s obvious delight in her new garments. He was concerned that his mother had forgotten where her heart should be. She smiled at him to let him know nonverbally that she had not. Before she could speak he left the room and tended to his horse outside.
On the road the young man who directed them to Molly turned out to be an excellent guide. His name was John Hartley. He was as tall as Running Wolf had been. He had a crop of blonde hair and crystal blue eyes. He was very young, barely twenty. He was recently dismissed from the army. He was in route to his family on the east coast when he saw The Mourning Dove and her children.
It was obvious to The Mourning Dove that he had taken a liking to Sparrow Song. Often she would see them riding ahead and talking. In every circumstance John would be sure to see that her comfort came before his.
One day when they had set up camp for the night, John followed Sparrow Song to the river to refill their water containers. While John was bending over and gathering water from the river she came up behind him. With a swift push she sent him into the river, head first. He was quick and before he lost his balance he grabbed her ankle and brought her along. They fell into the river with Sparrow Song nearly landing on top of John. They laughed as John took her into his arms. He kissed her and held her close.
Sparrow Song could feel her heart race. She had never been this close to man before. His kiss made her head spin and she found herself very embarrassed. She moved away as though he might hurt her. John was concerned that he had scared her.
“I am sorry Sparrow Song. I would never hurt you.”
John helped her out of the water. He took a blanket and covered her. He pulled her close to keep her warm. She allowed him, trusting him more.
“We had better get back,” she told him. “They will wonder what happened to us.” She also did not want her brother to find them. She knew how protective Swift Fox Who Enters Quickly was when it came to her. She was not sure how he would react. She was also quite anxious about this first encounter with a man. She needed to know him better, although she found her time with him exciting.
When they returned to camp they were still quite wet.
“We ‘um, had an accident at the river,” Sparrow Song said, her face flushed.
Swift Fox Who Enters Quickly looked annoyed. He did not buy the story. The Mourning Dove and Molly looked at each other and smiled.
~
It would take several weeks to arrive on the east coast. It did not take that long for Sparrow Song and John to fall in love.
~
It was late afternoon when they could see Hidden Meadows from the road. They stood with the horses for a moment as the house came into view.
Hidden Meadows stood as tall and proud as The Mourning Dove remembered. Although she had never wanted to leave the Plaines, the site of her childhood home looked welcoming. The three story red brick building had not changed very much. The only differences were the trees and foliage that had grown and matured during the last three decades. At a first glace it was as though time had stood still.
Molly and The Mourning Dove looked at each other as though they could read each other’s thoughts. They both became very emotional. This opulent structure held a multitude of memories. Molly pulled back from the rest.
“What is wrong, Molly?” John asked.
Molly was frozen in her tracks for a moment. All the years of longing to return had been replaced with doubt.
The Mourning Dove was lost in her own thoughts of the past when Swift Fox Who Enters Quickly rode beside her and put his hand on her arm. She gave him a reassuring smile.
“Is this where you grew up? Is this your home?” he asked his mother.
The Mourning Dove nodded to the first question. “Yes, this is Hidden Meadows.” She turned to her son her intent look now broken. She removed the hat she had worn for the duration of the trip. Her hair fell softly on her shoulders and down her back.
Swift Fox Who Enters Quickly saw that although she had been wearing the white man’s cloths she still had the feather in her hair. The feather she had taken from the headdress of her fallen warrior.
“My home was with your father,” she said almost sternly. Her eyes filled with tears.
Swift Fox Who Enters Quickly smiled. He knew then that she still had the heart of a Crow woman.
The Mourning Dove observed the difference in reaction of her children. Swift Fox Who Enters Quickly was not impressed just overwhelmed. Sparrow Song however was wide eyed with curiosity.
The Mourning Dove looked over to Molly who had moved her horse back. She seemed to be deep in thought. She understood her hesitation. She took this opportunity to make a request she had thought about since Molly revealed her identity.
“I would like to have a few minutes alone with Molly” she requested of their children. The two women dismounted their horses and walked away where they could not be heard. The Morning Dove made her request when they were alone.
“I need a promise from you. That is if you would do this for me, Molly?”
“Anything,” Molly said without hesitation.
“I want to know that you and Philip will look after my children. I can see that Sparrow Song is smitten with John. It is Swift Fox Who Enters Quickly that will need the most guidance. His heart is so heavy for many reasons. I know in time he will want to return to our people and…”
Molly stopped and faced The Mourning Dove. She did not let her finish. “I won’t hear of such talk from you Rebecca Butler. You talk as though you were going to die! We will all live in that house together, as it should have always been. That is if Philip wants me.”
“He will, Molly, I am sure of that.” She put her hand on Molly’s.
“My heart has been beating for too long without the love of my husband. It has grown very tired. The place I need to be
is with him.”
She looked to the estate that belonged to another lifetime.
“I have not been Rebecca Butler for a long time and I will not return to it now.”
Molly admired her devotion to Running Wolf and her tenacity in fulfilling the prophecy. She understood; she too had known the love of a man she would have died for, and almost did.
“I promise you that I will love and guide them as though they were my very own,” she said sincerely.
The two women hugged, the gentle breeze drying their tears.
Molly looked at The Mourning Dove.
“Please take Philip his son. I will be there later. I need to do this in my own way.” She did not know what to expect from Phillip after all this time.
“Two ghosts at once might be too much to bear.” She tired to make light of the situation.
They left Molly standing beside her horse as they approached the Butler mansion.
The Mourning Dove walked gingerly up the stairs of the home she had left so many years ago. Swift Fox Who Enters Quickly took her by the arm and smiled at her. He was sensitive to her hesitation. She looked into the eyes of her young son who had always been so wise. His look told her he understood the emotions she must be feeling.
Sparrow Song was unaware of much more than the grandeur of this house and the man she had come to love.
A young, attractive woman answered the door of the Butler home. Because she did not know any of them she was questioning them when Philip entered the foyer.
“Mary? Who is there?” He asked. He looked at the visitors. He could not believe his eyes and he had to sit for a minute when he saw Rebecca. He sat on the stairs almost gasping for air. Could it be that standing before him was Rebecca? How could such a miracle be taking place? He had dreamt of meeting his son but he never thought he would lay eyes on his beloved little sister again.
She looked so different, yet he would have known her anywhere. Her beauty had taken on a whole new glow but it was still definitely there. She had approached her autumn years as she did life itself, with the wonderment of a child yet the grace of a woman. In a moments glance he could see the softness in her face. He knew without asking that she had lived a life of harmony.
She approached him and held him, not wanting to let go. Although the years had separated them she felt a familiar comfort in his embrace. He could feel that she had survived her life with good health and contentment. The restless heart that he had when he thought about her was now filled with joy and resolve.
She pulled back from him and remembered what Molly had said about his injuries. She could not comment without giving Molly away. She noticed the cane.
“Are you well, Philip?” she asked.
He began to respond and then realized that she was referring to the cane. “Oh this,” he said as he lifted the cane. “We will have plenty of time to talk.” He looked at her and his eyes filled with tears. “Oh my God, Rebecca! I cannot believe what I am seeing.” He was still in shock. Was this real? He looked at the younger people in the foyer.
“Are these your children?” he questioned.
He could tell that two of them were definitely Indian heritage. The other man looked a lot like the child that was probably Rebecca’s son. He was very confused by the young man who had a light complexion and had a crop of blond hair. He was sure he was not her son.
The Mourning Dove introduced Sparrow Song, Swift Fox Who Enters Quickly, and John. She let him know their relationship as she introduced them. The Mourning Dove put her hand on the arm of Andrew and guided him toward Philip.
“Philip. I have brought you your son.”
This was too much for him to bear and he began to weep.
Andrew was gracious. He was moved with compassion for his father, a man he had never known. He moved toward him and allowed his embrace.
Philip buried his head in the boy’s shoulder and began to weep. “I knew you would return to me.” He pulled back for a moment. “If you only knew how I searched for you. I want you to know that I never gave up.”
Andrew smiled. All the animosity he once felt was quickly dissipating. He did not know if they could bridge the gap that the lies and time had created. He pledged in his heart that day that he would try. It was obvious this man had somehow been the victim of a very unfortunate situation. This was a man of character, not a man who sired him in merely lustful desire.
Today would be the beginning of a whole new life for Andrew if he allowed it.
Philip looked at his son and was in awe of the miracle he had prayed for with such yearning. It had finally come to fruition. At the same time he longed for the years that had he had been robbed. He had no idea where to even begin to mend the relationship that had been tattered so long ago. In time he would know these answers. Tonight he was jubilant. This house would once again have love and hope.
~
Molly stood in the Butler cemetery. She trembled when she saw her marker. She looked at the headstones of Jeremiah and Madeline. She wondered how he could take the truth about her to his grave. In her heart she wanted to believe that he really thought it was the best for Philip. But, what had he caused in his pursuit for control?
She looked to the grave where the wife of Philip had been buried. Rose was a woman who was able to accomplish what Molly could only dream; to become Philip’s wife. She could not hold any animosity or jealousy against this woman. She admired her for giving Philip some peace in his turbulent live, if only for a moment.
She noticed the headstone for Mrs. Walters. Martha was her first name. She had not known that until this very moment. She remembered her fondly.
She looked up and could see the servant’s quarters from the cemetery. She thought about the morning that Philip had convinced her to spend the day with him. It was a lifetime ago.
She noticed the fresh flowers on her grave. She picked them up as she left the cemetery of so many buried secrets.
~
Later that evening The Mourning Dove and Philip were alone. They spoke of their lives apart from each other. They shared the one thing that was common. They had both suffered loss of a child before birth.
When she saw the pain in the eyes of her brother she wanted to relieve it somehow. She had to remind herself that Molly would be telling him of her presence when the time was right. Tonight, Philip would have the joy he had been denied for so many years.
The Mourning Dove was feeling so much more tranquil and even found some comfort in the home she had left so long ago. She walked over to the pipes that once belonged to her father. She took one from the rack. Turning to Philip she said.
“Do you mind if I smoke?” she smiled as she teased him. “I would like it if you would join me. You won’t get in any trouble this time,” she was referring to their childhood experience.
He was so glad to have her back; so many of his questions were finally answered.
“I have worried about you so often, Rebecca. Is it okay if I call you that?” Philip asked.
She nodded. “Of course, but I have to tell you that the person that you are referring to no longer exists.”
“Then you were you treated well?” he asked.
The Mourning Dove had taken her seat. She was more relaxed than he had ever seen.
“I had the best husband a woman could hope for.” She looked as though she was in deep reflection. Her eyes filled with tears of both sadness and joy at the memory of Running Wolf. “He was a kind and gentle spirit of nature.” She smiled. “You know he even saved my life… twice. I tried to kill him twice.” She began to laugh as she filled the pipe with tobacco.
“I don’t doubt that, Rebecca. You always had guts in the face of adversity.”
She looked around the room that once hosted her coming home party. She remembered the words Mrs. Walters had said about a man who would cherish the ground she walked upon. This was not the first time the words of wisdom that Mrs. Walters offered, rang in her memory. She had it with Running Wolf. Mrs. Wa
lters was right.
“I cannot begin to tell you how my life was with Running Wolf, the entire clan for that matter. As a woman I held a much higher place in their society than I could have had I remained in the white world. Don’t misunderstand. I worked very hard. But, I never resented it,” she said. “There was peacefulness with my family that I feel privileged to have been a part of.”
“When I was first captured, I wanted to die. I did not have the nerve to kill myself.” She shook her head. She had not thought of her first night with the Crow in many years. “I was so fortunate to have been part of that world with a man who loved and cherished me.” The Mourning Dove was lost in her thoughts. “There is such a rich heritage there that is being destroyed” she told Philip with her heart sinking. She knew she must change her thoughts or she would have cried.
Philip was absorbed in her rumination of her life. He could see that she had lived a life that few understood.
The Mourning Dove had lit the pipe and was directing the smoke over her head. She questioned her brother.
“Have you thought about what you will do now that you have your son?”
Philip shook his head. “I am still in shock. I keep thinking that I will awaken soon and this will be a wonderful dream.”
The Mourning Dove smiled. She reflected for a moment on the evening that they had shared together. She had watched carefully the interchange between father and son. She was optimistic about the distinct probably that all would be healed, especially once Molly was part of the setting.
She had enjoyed watching the interaction of her family all night. Philip had a way of making everyone feel at home. He broke the ice by showing them a camera. He gathered the family together and took a photograph. They marveled at the images. He was sure to take a photo of each person alone as well as a group.
Although he knew nothing of their culture Philip went out of his way to speak to Swift Fox Who Enters Quickly. That was a comfort to The Mourning Dove. He had been so lost since the passing of his father.
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