by Rebel Farris
“Suit yourself.”
Gary shut the door and was walking across the yard to the neighbor’s front door before I could blink. I scrambled to kill the engine and chase him down before he got there. But the door opened. Tia stood in the doorway. What the hell is going on? Gary walked in past her, and she watched me, waiting.
I blinked a few times and marched up the steps to the door. “Why would you move down the street?”
“I didn’t.” She tilted her head to the side with a grin. “You gonna come in? Or you want to stand out there all night?”
She stepped aside, and I walked in.
The first thing I noticed was that the person who lived here had the same Ansel Adams print that I owned. And the same pillows on the couch that I had on the makeshift twin bed I called a couch. Weird. There were other items I’d seen before but couldn’t recall where. It took a couple of minutes for it to fully sink in, but when I saw him, I knew. This was some of the furniture from the farmhouse.
Xander.
He was framed by the opening to the hallway behind him as he leaned against the wall. Though parts of his face were still yellow from the fading bruises, he was still the most beautiful man I’d ever laid eyes on. Rachel, Gary, and their little boy were on the couch. Antonio sat on an armchair with his boy in his lap. But my eyes tracked back to him. Every muscle in my body seemed to relax with his soft smile.
“You’re back?”
He nodded.
“For good?”
He shrugged, pushing off the wall and walking toward me. “That depends on some things.”
There was a look of apprehension that crossed his face before he schooled his features. He was damn good at hiding things from people, but the longer I knew him, the more those brief flashes told me everything I needed to know. Something was off. I’d no clue what, and now wasn’t the time to ask. I was too overwhelmed with relief that he made it back alive and whole.
I looked around, and everyone was watching me. I began to get self-conscious a bit, as tears of relief welled in my eyes, but this was my family. I didn’t need to feel embarrassed in front of them.
Xander stopped in front of me and held out a tiny box. It was a wooden box, a little worn but intricately carved. A shiny gold ribbon was tied around it.
“Merry Christmas,” Xander said.
I pulled on the end of the bow and the ribbon fell away, fluttering to the floor. Opening the box, I found a set of three gold rings, one large one and two smaller ones, all of them carved with detailed engravings. I looked up, but Xander wasn’t there. Instead, he was down on one knee.
He cleared his throat as his cheeks pinked. “Those rings belonged to my grandparents. My mother gave them to me when I went back home and told her about you. She wants to meet you one day. I had to promise to bring you to my country soon to get those. And I will. If you allow me. I want to spend every day for the rest of my life, making you feel loved. You will never feel alone again. If you will have me as your husband.”
I couldn’t speak, holding back the sob that had lodged itself in my throat, but my head was already nodding. I never thought I would, but I wanted that, more than anything. I pulled his face to mine, kissing him with everything I couldn’t say. His arms wrapped around me, and I was lost. His smell, his warmth, the feel of his strong arms… all of it.
Then a cork popped, bouncing off the ceiling. I broke away and turned to find Tia pouring glasses of champagne into mismatched cups.
“Oh, my God. I’m so fudging happy for you.” Rachel bounced over to us, wiping tears from her eyes and wrapping her arms around us. “Congratulations. And Merry Christmas.”
“Merry Christmas,” I mumbled and hugged her back. “And thank you.”
“Congrats and Merry Christmas. We normally open presents on Christmas Day,” Tia said, handing Xander and me cups of champagne. “But we all have a big day tomorrow, so we let the kids wait up. They’re dying to open their gifts. But—”
“We want you to open yours first,” Rachel said, moving to the Christmas tree and pulling out a box and a card from a large pile of gifts. She walked back to me, holding out the card. “You can open Tia and Antonio’s gift first.”
I took the proffered card. “You guys really didn’t have to. I didn’t buy anything—”
“Not the point.” Tia held a finger up in the air. “Just open it.”
I opened the card slowly and carefully, trying to give respect to it. It was the first Christmas gift I’d received since I was a kid. Rachel groaned, and Tia lurched forward but then stopped.
“Just open it,” Gary sighed.
I laughed. “I’m sorry. It just feels like a big deal.”
I pulled the card out and opened it. A mass of papers fluttered to the ground. Xander helped me gather them up. Looking through them, I frowned.
“You bought me eight tickets to Las Vegas?” I looked to Tia and Antonio, my brows drawn in confusion.
“There are eight of us in this room,” Antonio said.
Rachel hopped on her toes and shook the box in her hands. “We’re goin’ to Vegas!”
I was so confused. It seemed so random. “Why?”
“Oh.” Rachel held out the box for me. “This should answer that. This is from me and Gare.”
I handed the card and tickets to Xander, then ripped into the box, curious about what it meant that this present explained the trip. Once the wrapping paper was cleared, I pulled off the lid and shuffled the tissue paper aside. White. That was all I could see, so I pulled it out. It was a white dress. A wedding dress.
It was simple, plain, classic lines. Not flashy or garish with beads and ruffles. It was perfect. But it was too much. It was all too much. They’d moved me into a new home and planned my wedding that was happening the next day. I didn’t deserve this. I would never deserve this. I wouldn’t insult them by shoving it back in their face, so I did the only thing I could do.
I let the tears fall.
“I’m afraid you’re going to be disappointed for the rest of your life when it comes to Christmas.” Rachel hugged me to her side.
I wiped at my face and set the dress back in the box. “Why’s that?”
Tia squeezed me from the other side. “It’s not every day that you get the chance to give a friend who truly deserves it a family for Christmas.”
More tears fell. And my heart felt so full.
Truths
We stepped out of the limo. Yeah, a fucking limousine. Apparently, Tia had a few connections in this town. A man in a suit that probably cost more than my monthly rent held the door open for me. The other one, who was actually driving, stepped out of the Little White Wedding Chapel with a nod to his friend.
Rachel was the last one out. The man in the suit shut the car door behind her. Xander had been eying the two men since they picked us up, which gave me pause. Like he was wary. Or maybe that was just me being paranoid. He’d assured me repeatedly that he made a clean cut with the organization he worked for—that there was nothing to worry about. Antonio shook these guys hand, laughing and joking with them like old friends. They maybe were old friends of his.
I was so lost in my thoughts, I didn’t realize I was the only one who hadn’t moved until Xander stepped back and grabbed my hand, pulling me toward the building.
The roof of the carport to this place was painted blue with stars, a moon, and angels. It was tacky, but in a sort of endearing way. The sign as we drove in called this the Tunnel of Love. I did giggle at that as we drove the stretch limo into its entrance.
When we stepped into the lobby, the walls covered in all the pictures of people who had been married there, famous and not. That’s when it hit me. I was really doing this. The shock wasn’t about Xander. I knew he was it for me. But my feet halted all the same.
Xander felt the tug on his hand and looked back at me. Seeing the look on my face, he frowned.
“What is wrong. Do you not want to do this?”
“No… I mean, yes. I do. It’s ju
st… she’s not here.”
He tilted his head in confusion.
“My mama. This is one of those moments she should be here for, but she never will. She’ll never meet you or the baby. And none of that stuff mattered when I got the call, but now it does.” I watched cars drive by on the street outside the window, blinking back tears. “I know none of that makes sense. It’s been five years since she died.”
His brows rose. And shit. I knew that was news to him. I was about to marry this man, and he knew so little about me.
“She died in a prison fight. Some gang attacked her. I can’t imagine what life had to be like for her. And I never thought of it that way until now. Like knowing we are going to have this baby. I want to protect it. I killed for this baby. And that’s no different than what she did. But I have spent so many years hating her for what I went through because she wasn’t there.” The tears started rolling down my cheeks. “I don’t know what I’m saying or why. I’m sorry.”
“Do not be sorry, Rosie. I want this. You. All your thoughts and worries. Never apologize for trusting me.”
“That’s about the fifth time I’ve heard him call you that,” Rachel called from the other side of the room. “Are you seriously going to marry the man and never tell him your real name?”
Xander smiled. He smiled so big that it turned into a laugh. A laugh so contagious that even though I was confused by it, and I think everyone else was too, eventually we were all laughing. And I needed that. I didn’t know how bad I needed that, but it felt like the room shifted. The world became brighter. I knew at that moment this was the best decision I would ever make in my life.
“I love you,” I said.
His smile shrank a fraction but didn’t go away. “I have a confession.”
“You do?” My smile grew wider. “What kind of confession?”
“The kind where you do not know my real name either.”
My shoulders shook in a silent chuckle. “Oh really?”
“You two are so weird.” Tia shook her head. “Definitely meant for each other. I can’t think of a single other person who would find this situation as cute and amusing as you two seem to.”
I shrugged. “The best stories are made from the things you did that were different.” I pressed a finger to his lips. “Don’t tell me now. I think we should wait for the ceremony.”
He kissed my forehead and nodded behind me. “We should go, Peaches. I think we have a schedule we are ignoring.”
I blushed at the name and followed his gaze back over my shoulder to where the chapel employee waited with a tapping foot.
“Right. I will see a lot more of you soon enough.” I winked.
He was ushered off in the opposite direction. I was taken to a dressing room where Tia and Rachel primped and preened over me with the resident makeup artist, but I shooed them all away after a few moments. I still wanted to look like myself.
A few more minutes went by and a woman strolled in with a rolling cart, allowing us a choice between two sets of flower bouquets: a mixture of flowers dominated by white roses or calla lilies. I loved the simplicity of the calla lilies. A grouping of three long-stemmed lilies for me, and a single stem each for Tia and Rachel, each bouquet wrapped with a white satin ribbon.
Then there was a knock at the door. It was Gary. His face was red, and he did not look happy. Rachel said something to him in a hushed tone.
“I can’t believe that you want our son to be a flower girl,” Gary huffed.
Rachel’s lips pinched. “He’s the flower boy. Nicky’s already the ring bearer. And I didn’t want to leave him out.”
“He’s not doing a girl’s job. That’s final.”
That’s when I saw the little cherub face and the wide hazel eyes peeking out from behind Gary. The toddler looked adorable in his tiny suit.
I tried to hold back my laughter, but it was pretty damn funny. “I have a better idea.” I walked over to Gary and bent down, eye level with the little boy. “I don’t have anyone to walk me down the aisle. You think you could do that?”
The little guy looked a little lost as to what the big deal was, but he nodded and smiled. I pulled the basket of flower petals from his hands and set it on the ground behind me. I looked up to Gary.
“Better?”
Gary nodded, looking a bit abashed. “Sorry.”
I shrugged and patted his shoulder. “We all have our limits.”
“We’re ready,” Rachel announced and stepped into the hall.
“I’ll go tell the guys.” Gary hurried off.
We waited, and Rachel coached her little boy on what to say and when to say it. It was going to be the cutest thing. I felt like I blinked and then the doors opened. Music was playing, and Tia disappeared inside. Rachel followed her. And then it was my turn. I felt the tiny hand take mine, and we turned the corner into the chapel.
My eyes locked on him first. It wasn’t Xander. No, it was Elvis. He was shifting his hips back and forth and striking poses, singing “I Can’t Help Falling in Love With You” as I walked down the aisle. It was so fucking ridiculous, I laughed out loud. I absolutely loved it. Everything about this was so perfect. It was tacky, all the way down to the disco ball hanging above the altar.
Then I locked eyes with him. He was watching me, smiling at my laughter. He looked at peace. Something I hadn’t realized until now was so different from the man I’d first met.
When I got to the end, Elvis wrapped the song up. “Who gives this bride to marry this man, uh-huh.”
“We all do,” Rachel’s little boy announced.
Tears filled my eyes quickly as I looked around the room. God, I loved these people. I was so wrong about my life. Before I met Xander, I’d looked at everything through a filter. I isolated myself out of fear and refused to see what was truly there. But I saw it now. This was my family, and I was as important to them as they were to me.
Elvis read the words of a standard civil service, asking us to fill in and repeat as necessary.
“Do you Catherine Rosita Dominguez, take Alexander Josef Dobransky as your lawfully wedded husband?"
Dobransky? It could work. I raised a teasing brow at Xander, and he mouthed Catherine at me, wrinkling his nose.
I tried to smother a laugh. “I do.”
“Do you Alexander Josef Dobransky, take Catherine Rosita Dominguez as your lawfully wedded wife?"
“I do.”
When he asked if we’d anything more to say, Xander had something else in store.
“We did not meet under the best of circumstances, but you still managed to captivate me. I had never seen anything else quite like you in all my life. You asked for nothing from me but honesty and truth, and in return you gave me your trust and your truths. Even though I could not give it to you then, I can now. I promise to love and protect you. To never lie and to trust you with my truths. I am not a rich man. I will never be able to give you everything you deserve in this life. But I can give you everything that I am, for as long as our souls exist, in this life and the next. I hope that is enough to keep you by my side.”
“It’s more than enough,” I choked out in a whisper through the tears clogging my throat. “All I want is you.”
“Mmmmmhmm… I’m all shook up,” Elvis replied.
I couldn’t help but laugh as the tears rolled down my face.
“Did you have any words you would like to say, darlin’?”
I shook my head, unable to speak. I was still torn between laughing and crying.
“Then I now pronounce you… husband… and wife, uh-huh. You may now kiss your bride.”
Xander’s lips pressed to mine, and I felt whole. Everything would forever be right in my world with him by my side. I never thought I would have this; I couldn’t imagine anything this perfect before. But it was mine. This future was mine. And I would enjoy every minute of it—in this life and the next.
Love
“I fucking hate you, you…” I gasped. “Motherfucker. H
owdareyoudothistome?” I screamed through clenched teeth.
I squeezed Xander’s hand with every drop of strength I had in me. The point was to hurt him. He didn’t blink. He didn’t react. A little smile played on his lips as he watched me.
“I’m going to rip your dick off if you don’t stop looking at me like— oooooohhhhhhhhh.”
Breathe. Breathe. I needed to breathe. Everything in me was clenched so tight I couldn’t utter words. Fuck. This hurts. My muscles relaxed again, and I wanted to thank the heavens. No. Not again.
“Okay, I need you to push with this one,” the doctor said, as she rolled farther between my legs, inspecting my vagina.
I felt her fingers probing down there, just before everything squeezed the life out of me.
“Aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.” I pushed and pushed until it felt like I was going to break something.
The doctor nodded. “You can relax.”
You can relax, dick-faced bitch.
“God, you are so beautiful. So amazing. You’re doing great,” Xander cooed, stroking my head.
My eyes cut to him in a glare. He was enemy number one at the moment. This was all his fault. Everything was his fault. I was not taking to motherhood well. I sucked at this. I hated everyone. Thank God I didn’t have laser-beam eyes, or I would have murdered everyone in this room. Including Rachel.
Snotty bitch was standing on my other side, her shoulders shaking in silent laughter as she smirked at me.
“You’re doing great. You got this.” She leaned over and peeked at my cooch. “I can see the head!”
“What does that fucking mean? Is it…? Is—Ohmygod.”
“Push,” the doctor commanded. “Keep pushing, keep pushing, keep pushing…”
I wanted to push a broomstick up her ass, is what I wanted to do. But I also wanted this baby to get the fuck out of my body.
“You’re doing great.” The doctor smiled. “One more push, and the shoulders will be out. You can do this.”
Why do people keep saying that? You’re doing great? What would I be doing if I was doing bad?