by Rye Brewer
What he didn’t do was step through.
“Is everything all right?” I dared ask. “It’s very easy, crossing over. There’s nothing fearsome about leaving our land. Just in case you were wondering.”
He offered a faint smile, as though he didn’t want to hurt my feelings. “I wasn’t concerned. I can throw portals of my own.”
“Oh.” I looked down at the ground, suddenly embarrassed. Would I ever learn when to stay silent? A question Gregor had asked me at least three times a day for as long as I’d acted as his mage-fae.
“I was merely asking myself a question,” Allonic continued as he stroked his chin, gazing into the swirling energy vortex which led to the human world.
“What is it? If you don’t mind,” I added hastily.
“I wondered if you would come through with me. For only a short while,” he explained when my eyes went wide.
“I—I don’t know…” I glanced over my shoulder.
Nothing had changed back there. Everyone enjoyed the lovely night they were having. A few of the lights had gone out over the course of our walk, the lanterns extinguished in favor of a good night’s sleep. They wouldn’t know I was missing. They didn’t even know I was out of the Hermitage yet.
“I promise, you can come right back.”
What was he getting at? Did he have something to show me? Or was he that reluctant to end our time together? I hardly dared hope it was the latter.
“All right,” I decided. It wasn’t as though I’d never gone through, though I hadn’t exactly made a habit of it in the past.
The human world was so much… less than ours. It was the only way I could describe it. But he wanted me to go, so I would go. I would’ve followed him anywhere just then.
The air changed the moment I stepped through. That was the first thing I noticed. The next was the lack of vibrancy in the color around us. The distant trees were colorful, I supposed, as far as color could go in the human world. But it was nothing compared to what we’d just left.
The sky was inky black, dotted with distant stars, and the air was cooler than it had been in Avellane. I rubbed my arms, looking around, wondering what he wanted to show me.
The cathedral? I’d seen it.
“Have you ever coursed?” he asked, sounding more like a shy schoolboy than anything else.
It touched me deeply, and I had to smile.
“I’ve heard of coursing. It’s something vampires are able to do, right?”
He nodded.
“Anissa is the first vampire I’ve ever known. And you’re the first shade. My real-life experience is pretty shabby, isn’t it?”
He shook his head. “I wouldn’t say that. Limited, perhaps, but that’s not your fault—or mine,” he added with a rueful smile. “At any rate, I wondered if I could course with you. Just back and forth, just for a minute. You’ve shown me so much that’s new. I’ll never forget it. I wanted to give you something in return.”
A warm, delighted tingle started in my toes and moved up through my legs and onward until it reached the top of my head. I couldn’t tell him that he’d already given me so much that I’d remember, even when I’d want to forget it for the sake of my wounded heart. There was no way he’d understand. It would only make the last of our time together uncomfortable.
“Didn’t you have work to get to? Weren’t you in a hurry?”
He certainly seemed like he was when he nearly ran from the Hermitage.
“It can wait for a short while.” As simple as that.
“All right,” I breathed in one burst of air, taking the hand he offered me.
It was warm, smooth, strong. The sort of hand that would protect, never hurt, no matter how much stronger it was than mine. Could he feel how nervous he made me?
“Are you ready?” His eyes glowed a warm, brilliant amber as he smiled.
“I think so. This is entirely new. I’m not sure what to expect.”
“I wouldn’t do anything I felt would cause you harm. Just hold on. Don’t let go.”
I only had time to nod before we were off.
Suddenly, the world was rushing past though it felt as if we were standing still. Or, at least, I was. I didn’t have to move my feet. It was almost as if they floated inches off the ground. We existed in a bubble, it seemed. Trees and fences and roads rushed past at breakneck speed.
I looked around in awe of it all, my heart about ready to burst from sheer joy and exhilaration. It was like flying, or as close as I could imagine it.
And all the while, Allonic clasped my hand as though his life depended on it. Not mine—I shuddered to think of what would happen to me if we broke that connection, imagining my body hurtling into a tree trunk or the side of a building, far off in the distance. His.
When we stopped, it was with disappointment on my part. I wanted to laugh at myself for feeling disappointed, but I was too busy feeling awed at how far we’d gone.
When I looked behind us, I could barely see the cathedral which served as headquarters for the vampire clans. It was a pinpoint on the horizon.
“Shall we go back?” he asked with a grin. I felt him taking me in, gauging how I felt.
I offered a brilliant smile in response.
“Yes. I want to do that again.” I squeezed his hand to show I meant it, and we were on our way in the blink of an eye, the world zipping by us again.
I had never known such excitement, such a rush of pure energy. I wanted to hold onto the moment, live as deep in it as I could, and remember every last sensation. I wanted to take it with me when he was gone.
He stopped at roughly the same place we’d started, and I realized I was laughing when he did.
“What’s so funny?” he asked.
“Nothing. Everything. I don’t know. Haven’t you ever felt something so strongly, there was nothing to do but laugh just to let it out?”
He shook his head, a little confused. “I can’t say I’ve felt many things that strongly until now.”
Until now.
What did that mean? I didn’t dare hope, no matter how much of me wanted to. I wanted to so very badly.
I looked down and noted how neither of us had let go of the other’s hand. Our fingers were still clasped just as tight as ever. He looked down, too, but made no sign of letting go. Something was happening, something that had never happened to me before.
My heart hammered wildly, and I had to remind myself to breathe.
“Thank you for that,” I whispered.
“Thank you. I don’t think I’ve ever enjoyed doing that more than I just did.”
“I take it that’s a compliment,” I giggled softly.
“It was supposed to be. I’m extremely unpracticed at complimenting women. Or anyone.”
“You’re doing well enough.”
“Am I?”
“I haven’t run screaming, have I? I could literally leave the world right now if wanted to.”
“Fair enough.” He looked off into the distance, then back at me.
Our hands parted. I couldn’t explain the sense of loss. I’d never see him again.
“Can I see you again?”
My breath caught—and for one brief moment, I was sure my heart stopped beating. I must have imagined it. There was no chance of him saying such a thing. Yet the hopeful expression on his face as he waited for a reply told me otherwise.
There was only one answer. “Yes. Of course. As soon as possible.” I had to bite my tongue to keep from babbling on and making myself sound foolish. Though he didn’t seem to mind.
It was the most natural thing imaginable, the way he leaned down to brush his lips against mine in the sweetest kiss.
17
Anissa
I never saw Gregor looking the way he looked as he led me out of the Hermitage and through the cool night air. The moon had risen until it was almost directly overhead, and it bathed everything around us in a mystical, silvery light. Stars dotted the sky. I wondered vaguely if there were
constellations in Avellane.
Gregor’s face was a mask of confusion, anger, curiosity, and they fought against each other until his features twisted into something unrecognizable. What was he going through? Why did Allonic disturb him so deeply?
“I know, I know, I should’ve warned you that he was also a vampire,” I said, hoping to get through to him. If he would just talk to me instead of walking in silence, with his hands deep in his robes. I had no idea what was going through his head or what it meant for me, only that he was a mess inside.
“Yes. You should have,” he replied, and I was relieved to hear his voice even if frustration made it deeper than ever.
“I’m sorry. Really, I am. I didn’t know what else to do. He needed help, and we were near the portal…”
“Enough.” He stopped so abruptly, I almost crashed into him for the second time in less than an hour. “I’m not concerned with any of that—well, I am, but not so concerned as I am with other things.”
I gulped. “What other things?”
“Other things such as the fact that he reminds me strongly of someone I used to know.” He whirled on me. “How is that possible?”
I blinked, suddenly very cold inside. “I had no idea,” I managed to croak, though my mouth had gone bone dry.
“You’re sure about that, daughter? You’re positive?”
I had a choice to make. Should I even bother lying? He probably already knew what he needed to know. Allonic favored his father, who I had never met, but there were bits of Mom in his face, too. The shape of his eyes, the curve of his jaw.
His fangs.
Gregor went on. “How could the shade-vampire hybrid remind me so much of a vampire who couldn’t possibly have given birth to him? One who is dead.”
There was a weight crushing my chest. He knew. I hadn’t thought of this, any of it. Then again, I didn’t know he would ever find out about Allonic’s presence. Cold sweat dampened the back of my neck.
His shoulders fell, along with his face. He suddenly looked very tired, but there was a spark of hope in his eyes. Regret, too, over so much lost time. “Where is Tabitha? And how long have you known she’s alive?”
My knees were so weak all of a sudden. I sat on the trunk of a fallen tree—its bark was damp and cold, and the moisture soaked through my jeans, but I barely felt it. “I didn’t know until I met Allonic. That’s the truth.”
“Did you know who his mother was the last time we saw each other?”
I tried to think back—it was all such a mixed-up mess in my head, since so much had happened all at once. “I did,” I said, slowly, piecing it together. “I knew I had a half-brother. I believe I knew she was alive. But I hadn’t seen her yet.”
That was a mistake, putting it like that. His eyes flew open the way Allonic’s had when he first woke up. “And now?” he sputtered. “You’ve seen her?”
I nodded.
“How was she? Was she well?” He sat beside me, almost on top of me, breathless and eager. I couldn’t help but pity him, especially since he wouldn’t like what I had to say. How could I put it so it would be easier for him to take?
“She’s well,” I replied, slow and thoughtful. It was like trying to navigate a minefield. “But different than she used to be. She lives in seclusion.”
His eyes darkened. “Different? How? Seclusion? Why?”
Time to be extra careful. “First, you have to know this: the story about her being burned in the Great Fire is true. She was burned horribly, but it wasn’t the Fire that nearly killed her. It was the sun. She was near death when she was found.”
“Found by whom?”
I took a deep breath. “By Allonic’s father. He nursed her back to health, gave her his blood in order to heal her. It took a long time and a lot of feeding after being burned so severely.”
He took this in, and I held my breath as I watched. He had to imagine her growing close to somebody else, letting the shade heal her in such an intimate way. A shade who eventually became Allonic’s father. It couldn’t have been easy. I resisted the urge to reach out and pat his hand.
He pulled himself together and asked, “Why is she in seclusion, then? I assume she’s healed by now?”
“I guess it’s the only place she felt she could stay—in ShadesRealm, where Allonic lives with the rest of them. She’s safest there, in her mind—but even then, she has to stay away from the shades. They don’t love vampires, as I guess you know.”
“And yet they accept a hybrid?” he murmured, cocking an eyebrow.
“Yes, well, even then. There are ways of accepting someone without really accepting them.” I couldn’t help but remember my history, and how I lived inside the Carver mansion but never felt like I was one of them.
He nodded, then stood. “I want to see her.” I wondered if I looked the way he did when I felt especially determined to do something—shoulders back, head high, a defiant look in my eye.
I could only sigh. “Yeah, that makes two of us. But it’s not that easy.”
“Why not? You know where she is, right?”
“For one thing, even if she were in ShadesRealm right now, it wouldn’t be as easy as walking up to the tower and knocking on the door. But as it is, she’s somewhere else.”
“Where?”
I shifted uncomfortably on the log. The cold wetness was starting to seep into my consciousness, and I didn’t enjoy it, but I needed the rest after coursing earlier. “She’s with Sara. My sister. There was an emergency.”
“Is she in trouble?” He sounded like he cared, and I wondered why. For my sake? For my mother’s?
“I won’t even bother trying to sugarcoat it. Yes. There’s trouble. She went with Sara to get things straightened out. I can’t go where they are—neither of us can,” I added when he opened his mouth like he wanted to argue that he could.
“Why not?” he asked instead.
“Because they’re in Hallowthorn Landing. Are you familiar with it?”
He nodded.
“We would need a witch portal to get there. I’m many things, but I’m not a witch.”
He chuckled. “You need a witch. I can get you a witch.”
It was my turn to chuckle. “Oh? You have one up those sleeves of yours? Can I borrow her?”
“No,” he laughed, “but I have the next best thing. A mage-fae.”
“And that’s like a witch?” I asked, surprised.
“Every fae kingdom has a mage-fae,” he explained as he helped me to my feet. “Unlike witches, whose power comes through the bloodline, a mage-fae is fae-born and mage-trained. They serve and advise the king. They even harangue the king, in some cases.” His face twisted up in a sour expression.
Harangues the king. That could only mean one person. “Is it Felicity?” I asked, almost laughing.
He grimaced. “Indeed. How do you think she would’ve dared bring another species to Avellane otherwise? She knew she could work her way around me and possibly bully me into submission. I swear, that tenacity must be trained into them, too. Unless it’s merely her personality that makes her so impossible.” But there was respect in his voice, too, as well as irritation.
“Could Felicity create a witch portal, then?”
“With my approval.”
My heartbeat picked up. “Would you grant your approval?”
“Of course, I will.”
I would be able to see my mother again. We had so little time together—it was like getting a glimpse of something really incredible, amazing, beautiful, and having it taken away. Life might have been easier if that thing had never been glimpsed. I missed her more than I ever had, knowing she was alive.
Gregor held up a forefinger. “And I will escort you to Hallowthorn Landing,” he added. “I’ll finally get to see Tabitha again.”
18
Jonah
“If you hadn’t spooked Cari, she wouldn’t have run.” Gage’s face was a mask of rage. So was mine, I guessed, based on how I felt as we rode up
to the penthouse in the elevator. It made sense. We were twins, after all.
“If I hadn’t spooked her?” I couldn’t help but laugh, though it turned into a snarl at the end. “If you hadn’t created her, none of this would be a problem.”
It was the same argument we’d been having for hours. Changing our location to the penthouse did nothing to cool either of us down.
“You left the damn door wide open,” he snarled, still stuck in his train of thought. “You had to go and rush us that way, and you left the door open for her to run. You didn’t stop to think. Do you ever stop to think?”
The two of us marched off the elevator on our floor, and not a moment too soon. I was about to say things that were for our ears only. I couldn’t run the risk of somebody in the clan overhearing and knowing the stupid, vile, repugnant—illegal—thing my brother had done.
With that in mind, I slammed the door hard enough that a cracking noise resounded through the penthouse before charging him—the way he said I did back at the other apartment, where I’d found the two of them. Him and that thing he created.
He was too quick for me to catch him by surprise, and the two of us tussled for a moment before he threw me off. I landed on the sofa but bounced to my feet.
“Don’t you see what really matters here?” I shouted. “You broke the law! You turned a human into one of us! What’s wrong with you? What could you possibly have been thinking, Gage?”
I panted, breathless by then, and disappointment tinged the rage that had boiled in me ever since I opened the door on the pair of them. He would die for what he had done. Couldn’t he see it?
He couldn’t. It was obvious. I knew the stubborn look on his face well enough. The look he got when he was determined that he was in the right. Nobody could sway him when he looked like that. All the trouble that stubborn streak of his had gotten us into.
“I’m sorry if I couldn’t let the girl die the way she was about to. There didn’t seem to be any choice at the moment.”