by Rebeca Seitz
Kendra rolled the glue runner down the back of a picture and fixed it to paper. Public places where the sisters wouldn’t be, she amended. If seeing a strange man on the streets of Stars Hill had prompted a scrapping night, then there was no telling what seeing him a second time would do. Daddy might call hellfire and brimstone down on her head during his next sermon.
She pictured Daddy behind the pulpit at Grace Christian, vein bulging in his neck as he hammered home the consequences of adultery. He’d be right, but not about her. What she shared with Harry was friendship. A special friendship, yes, but just a friendship.
Seven
Kendra jumped at the sound of a drawer slamming and looked up.
“I can’t believe she arranged my desk drawers!” Tandy ran a hand through her red waves. “How could you let her do this?”
Kendra went back to the computer screen in front of her. “Nobody lets Joy do anything, you know that. She was on an organizing spree.”
“What happened to having a ‘silent’ partner?”
“She said this was silent.” Kendra finished a welcome e-mail to another new member and hit Send, then turned to focus on Tandy. “You’ve gotta admit, it was a silent move.”
“This is so not funny, Kendra. How would you feel if she came in here and started organizing your desk?”
“I think she knows better, which is why I still know where my pens and rubber bands are.”
“Huh.” Tandy took another look in the newly organized drawer and slammed it again. “I’ve half a mind to call her up and find out what she was thinking.”
“Oh, T, it’s not as bad as all that. She put your stuff in order. If you hate it, dump it all out, and you’ll have the mess back.”
“Well, maybe it’s not so bad.”
Kendra grinned. “Good for you.”
“Yeah, well, she should be happy I’m working on learning the fine art of compromise.”
Kendra’s eyebrows rose. “You? Compromise? What happened to the tough lawyer who wouldn’t take anything less than an acquittal every time?”
“I think I left her back in Orlando.” Tandy smiled. “She wasn’t very good at planning a wedding.”
“Uh-oh. Troubles in paradise?”
Tandy put her elbows on the desk and rested her chin in her hands. “Not trouble, exactly. It’s just a whole lot harder than I thought it would be. I had no idea there were so many options out there for everything from dresses and flowers to colors and music and the time of day we have the wedding. And every single choice has ramifications. An evening wedding means I need a formal gown. A noontime wedding means a casual affair, so the dresses you guys wear have to have a shorter hemline or be made of a cotton or linen. A morning wedding is evidently unheard of anymore because no one can decide if it’s a formal or casual time of day.”
Kendra chuckled. “Somebody should tell the sun he needs a tux to usher in the new day.”
Tandy’s smile was halfhearted. “Yeah.”
“What time does Clay want to get married?”
“That’s just it. He’s as opinion-less as a human being could be. Every time I tell him all the options for one particular decision, he shrugs and says, ‘Whatever you want, babe.’ And I want to throttle him. What I want is an opinion, for goodness’ sake!”
“Okay, take a breath, Bridezilla.” Kendra came around her desk and sat on the corner of Tandy’s. “I think you should get married in the morning in early October. Mornings in October are beautiful, with all the trees in glorious color and the hint of winter in the air but not strong enough to leave anybody cold. You could have brunch afterward, which will keep your food costs down, and folks still have half the day ahead of them after you and Clay take off for your honeymoon.”
“Morning, hmm?” Tandy closed her eyes, and Kendra fell silent, letting her sister picture a beautiful wedding morning full of autumn promise. It’d be tricky, planning a wedding for early October when they were already into August, but it could be done. And Daddy could always get the church for them if Tandy didn’t want to get married outdoors.
A small smile began to grow on Tandy’s face. “Morning. Yep, I think the first Saturday in October at nine in the morning.”
“Perfect timing. Late enough for folks to sleep until seven, but early enough to be finished in time for brunch.” Kendra walked back around to her desk. “And brunch will be easier on Daddy’s wallet than dinner, so he’ll be happy. Feel better?”
“You have no idea. Thanks, Ken.”
Kendra shrugged. “What’s a sister for?”
“A host of things, and you seem to do them all for me. Really, thanks.”
“Enough with the gratitude. Call Clay and tell him you picked a date and time.”
Tandy picked up the phone and dialed. Kendra’s cell phone vibrated in the pocket of her capris, and she pulled it out to check the caller ID.
Darin.
“Kendra Sinclair.”
“These arms of mine,” Darin sang in a pretty good imitation of Otis Redding, “they are lonely …”
Kendra burst out laughing. “Darin, you freak! What do you want?”
Darin cut the act short. “I’m hoping you can do something about these lonely arms. They’re really, really wanting to go dancing tomorrow night; but I had a long conversation with them, and they just refuse to bare their loneliness to the world.”
“You are a complete freak. You know this, right?”
“It’s been said.”
“Good, as long as you’re comfortable in your freakiness, then I guess the rest of us can accept you for who you are.”
“Does that mean you’ll go to Heartland with me tomorrow night? My arms would be eternally grateful for the presence of your alluring beauty.”
“With arms like that, who needs romance novels?”
“I take it that’s a yes?”
“Yes, it’s a yes. Do you know if Daddy and Zelda are going to be there?”
“I don’t. Clay might, though. Want me to ask him?”
“No, I’m sure they’ll be there. They always are on Friday nights.” She tried to take the bitterness out of her voice but failed.
“He’s allowed to date, you know.”
Kendra sighed. “I know. And I was fine with it when
I thought he was just exploring something new and all. But Tandy says he’s getting serious, and I don’t think I’m cool with that.”
“Would your dad stop seeing Zelda if you or one of the sisters didn’t approve?”
“He would, but I’m not gonna get all up in his business like that.”
“Probably a wise choice. How’s the painting coming, by the way?”
“It’s coming. I worked on it last night.” While I talked with another man. Should I tell you that?
She closed her eyes. It was as though she were living two lives. One was the Kendra who talked with Harrison late into the night; the other, this Kendra who accepted dancing invitations from Darin. Was this what it felt like to lose your mind? To have multiple personalities?
“When can I see it?”
“The first Saturday in October. Tandy finally picked a date.” No need to tell him that “working on it” meant staring at a blank canvas, struggling to figure out how to paint a happy picture full of love when her own life was such a mess.
“She did? That’s great. Wait, you mean you’re not going to show me this until the rest of the world sees it?”
“I mean I don’t know if it’s going to be finished even a day before the wedding.”
Darin’s guffaw rang across the line, and she melted inside. This man was so good. Gorgeous, talented, interested. What was she doing messing around with Harrison? Stupid other Kendra.
“You’ll finish it, Kendra.”
“Oh, you think so?”
“I do.”
“Guess I missed seeing your crystal ball the last time I was at your place.”
“I brought it out of storage just for you.”
“That’s mighty sweet of you.”
“Well, I’m a mighty sweet guy.”
“So I’ve noticed.”
“Have you now?”
“It’s kinda hard to miss.” She twirled a curl around her finger.
“Then I guess I’m doing this courting thing right.”
“Seriously, you’ve got to quit using that word. You sound like you’re stuck in 1950.”
“From what my momma says, 1950 was a pretty good year.”
“Be that as it may, I don’t think I want to turn the clock back quite that far.”
“What? You don’t want to experience free love and bell bottoms?”
“I think that was the late sixties and early seventies. And, no, bell bottoms make me look like Dame Dumpy.”
“Dame Dumpy?”
“You’d understand if you ever saw me in bell bottoms.”
“An occurrence I can assume will not happen anytime in the near future?”
“Try existing future and you’ll be getting close.”
He laughed, and she was warmed again by the sound. This was crazy, going back and forth between Darin and Harrison.
So stop. Just accept your fate. You know Harrison is what you deserve. That he’s all you can ever have in life. All your mother left you suitable for.
The snide inner voice left her cold.
She sat up straight and closed out of the program she’d been working in. Time to head home. “Anyway, I need to get out of here and get a little more work done on that painting.”
“Are you trying to get rid of me, Kendra Sinclair?”
“Me? Never. Can’t believe you’d think such a thing.”
“Mm-hmm. Never play poker, honey. I’ll pick you up at seven?”
“I can just meet you there if it’s easier.”
“It might be easier, but no way am I running the chance of another man seeing you in the parking lot and snatching you up before I even get a dance.”
“Hmm, guess I’ll tell my other boyfriends to leave me alone until after the first dance, then.”
At the sudden silence on the line, she frowned. Had she lost the connection? “Darin?”
“I’m here. Just wondering how much of that was a joke.”
Her heartbeat slammed into overdrive, and she kicked herself for being so stupid. “What do you mean?”
“I know we haven’t talked about it, so I don’t have a right to expect you not to see other people, I guess.”
She waited. Would he keep going or let the issue die?
He sighed. “How about we talk this over tomorrow?”
She slowly released the breath she’d been holding. “Okay. See you at seven.”
She closed the cell and finished the shut-down procedures for her computer. “Hey, I think I’m going to head on home.”
Tandy glanced at her. “Already? We’ve only been here a couple of hours.”
“I know, but I’ve got this sister who wants a painting for her wedding present, and you wouldn’t believe what she’d do to me if I didn’t get it done in time.”
“Sounds like an awful monster.”
“She has her moments.”
Tandy shot a rubber band at her, barely missing Kendra’s arm.
“Hey!”
“You had it coming.”
“Maybe so.” Kendra slung her bag over her shoulder and headed for the back door. “All the same, I’ll see you tomorrow night at Heartland, okay?”
“You going with Darin?”
“Who else would I be going with?” Kendra pushed out of the door before Tandy could answer and went to her RAV4, images of Harrison and Darin battling for preeminence in her mind.
She debated the whole way home, arguing the logic of having no contact with a man who sported a gold band on a finger, even if all they did was talk. Even if his commitment to his vows might be wavering right now.
Or maybe because of that.
Reality demanded that she end things with Darin, though, not Harrison. Because Darin’s goodness, his rightness, his smart choices in life dictated that he not end up with the likes of her. Harrison, on the other hand, could offer exactly what she deserved—the opportunity to be the other woman. How many marriages had Sylvia broken up? How many men had used Sylvia to prove to themselves what they already knew—that they weren’t in love with their wives and weren’t willing to do the work it took to be in love again?
The inevitability of the situation hit her as Kendra pulled into her driveway. How could she be expected to do anything other than what she was doing? That old saying, “The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree,” must exist for a reason, right?
Her feet hit the stairs like anvils as she trudged up to her door. The weight of her past, of a childhood she neither asked for nor relished, hit her anew. Letting Darin get involved with her, responding to him—that’s what needed to stop. If she had a decent bone in her body, she’d set him free.
She unlocked her door and entered to find Miss Kitty lying on the back of the sofa. “Hey, Miss Thang.” She went over and scratched a hello on the cat’s head, then walked down the hallway to her painting studio. An empty canvas stood silent sentinel on its easel. She punched the button on her stereo system, and Kelly Clarkson’s voice filled the room.
“The trouble with love is, it can tear you up inside …”
The mirrors lining half of one wall reflected back her sad smile. How could she be expected to paint a happy scene for a wedding gift when the mess of her own love life rivaled Jennifer Aniston’s? Crossing the small room, she picked up a paintbrush and stared at it. Some artists believed the brush itself held a touch of magic and mystery, that it would speak if the right person wielded it.
She held it up to the canvas, barely allowing the clean bristles to touch the canvas. Closing her eyes, she let herself feel the beautiful tension that always rode the air when Harrison was in her presence. Her shoulders rose, and she sucked in her breath. Tossing her head, she watched the scene on the backs of her eyelids. It presented a lovely tableau, its essence broken only by the knowledge that this could never be right. He was married.
Which meant she couldn’t have Darin because he was too right and she couldn’t have Harrison because he was too wrong.
She opened her eyes to see that the paintbrush had stayed stubbornly still.
In a surge of defiance and anger, she threw it against the wall.
The opening violin strains of Al Green’s “How Can You Mend a Broken Heart?” replaced Kelly Clarkson’s voice, and Kendra clutched her stomach. Were there music gremlins hiding in her stereo, waiting to play just the right song to make her feel even worse?
Why couldn’t she call things off with Harrison? How long could this go on? How many more days—weeks?— before Darin found out that he wasn’t the only man in her life? He’d made it clear that they would be having “that” talk tomorrow at Heartland. And what would he say when she told him she thought they should keep seeing other people? Or could she tell him with a straight face that they should only see each other? No, not unless she meant it. But could she mean it? And if not, could she end things with him?
Maybe Harrison wouldn’t call anymore. They hadn’t spoken since his impromptu trip to Stars Hill earlier in the week. That didn’t mean much, though. They’d gone months without speaking to each other—months that had allowed her to move on and start seeing Darin—only to have Harrison call and pick things up right where they’d left off.
Well, not exactly where they’d left off. At least she had that; they would never share a kiss again. There was a line somewhere that couldn’t be crossed. Together she and Harrison could find that line. They were close to figuring it out now. Meetings in public places. Conversation only. Okay. Not a sin against anybody. If his wife saw them talking, surely she couldn’t get upset over her husband having a friendship. That would be stupid, right?
No more stupid, of course, then neglecting your husband to the point that he could sneak off for conver
sation with another woman, anyway.
Kendra lifted her head and looked herself in the eye on the wall mirror as Al Green sang, “We could never see tomorrow. No one said a word about the sorrow.”
As the Reverend sang on, Kendra sank to the plush carpet and felt a part of her being ripped from its moorings. It had to, or she would drown in the moral abyss.
Eight
Tandy flipped a page in Brides Magazine and reached to dog-ear the page. The pale shimmer of gold silk on this dress would be perfect in the early morning light. Plus, the color would look great on Kendra’s dark skin and against Meg’s blonde hair. It might not be the absolute best color for Joy, though.
She cocked her head and considered the color again. What would Joy’s pale skin look like swathed in pale gold? Hmm, either she’d look gorgeous or sick. Tandy reached for the office phone and called Joy’s cell.
“Hello? This is Joy.”
“Hey, Joy. It’s Tandy.”
“I cannot believe I haven’t programmed the SI office line into my phone yet. Every time you call, it shows up as Unknown.”
“Good, I get to take you by surprise.”
“Only until I get the number in this phone, and I’m making a note right now on my to-do list, so enjoy your last surprise phone call, sister.”
“Oh, drat.”
Joy’s tinkling laugh sounded. “What’s going on at the SI offices?”
“Not a whole lot. I’m getting out some new-member T-shirts and helping the club out in Los Angeles organize an all-night crop.”
“That sounds fun.”
“It is. I can’t believe this is my day job now.” Tandy looked around the cheery office and felt blessed all over again. “Listen, though, I’m calling about the bridesmaid dresses.”
“Did you finally pick a style? A color? A date? A time? A theme?”
“Whoa, sister. Take a breath!”
“Sorry. You know me and weddings.”
“I know, I know. You live for the happily-ever-after moment.”
“You better believe it. Now, what is it about the dresses? I place my expertise at your service.”
“Well, I picked a date. It’s going to be the first Saturday in October at nine in the morning. I’ve decided to do semiformal, and now I’m picking colors. How do you look in pale gold?”