Softly so that her stepmother would not see her, she opened another door and slipped into a small side room as her stepmother passed and continued on down the passage.
She waited until she was out of sight and then she went into her father’s room.
She walked to the bed, bent down and kissed him.
“How are you feeling, Papa?” she asked him. “I do hope you are well enough to eat these wild strawberries I have brought for you. I know you like them better than the ones that grow in the garden.”
“Strawberries!” exclaimed the King. “That means summer is here and we must enjoy every minute of it.”
“I think we deserve it after that very hard winter,” Attila agreed.
She sat down beside the bed.
“I have a distinct feeling, Papa,” she began softly, “that Stepmama has been talking to you about my being married. I have no wish to marry anyone and I am very happy here with you.”
“Which is just where I want you to be, my darling. At the same time your stepmother is insistent that you look round at the eligible young men and she seems to have one particularly in mind – ”
“I think that you must be referring to Prince Otto of Dredregen and I can tell you now, dear Papa, he has a very unpleasant reputation. I know Mama would not approve of him coming here to the Palace, let alone wishing to marry me!”
She spoke so vehemently that the King reached out and patted her hand.
“Now, now, my dearest. We know nothing at all about this young man. He may be very desirable and your stepmother feels quite rightly that you should have a home of your own.”
“I cannot see anything right about it,” she asserted, “and there is no real reason for me to hurry into marriage.”
“No, no of course not,” agreed the King. “At the same time I married your darling mother the day before her eighteenth birthday. It was undoubtedly the best and most wonderful thing that could possibly have ever happened to me.”
There was anguish in her father’s voice, which was what Attila always heard when he spoke about her mother.
“Mama knew you were so happy, because she told me you both fell in love the moment you met one another.”
The King nodded.
“That is so very true. When I first saw your mother, I thought I was meeting an angel from Heaven and that is exactly what she was when she married me.”
“Mama told me how handsome and charming you were. So you will understand, Papa, that I want to fall in love in the same way and not be pushed off on some Prince who in Stepmama’s eyes is of great dynastic importance.”
There was silence for a moment then the King said,
“I have not told you, Attila, because I did not want to upset you, but the doctors who examined me two days ago are very worried about my condition.”
“Oh no, Papa! What is wrong? I thought you were just tired.”
“If I am to be truthful,” he replied, “I have to face the fact that I will not live for very long. I have a disease, my dearest, for which there is no known cure. Although I may live for several years, it will not be longer than that.”
“Papa!”
Atilla gave a loud cry of horror as she bent forward to put her arms around her father’s neck.
“Oh, Papa, how could this happen to you?”
“I am afraid it happens to a large number of people and the doctors are not as clever as they pretend to be.”
“But surely there must be somewhere we can go? Perhaps Germany or Spain?”
The King shook his head.
“The doctors say it would be quite useless and the journey would only make me worse.”
There were tears in Attila’s eyes as she pleaded,
“I cannot lose you too, Papa. When I lost Mama I thought it was the end of the world, but if I lose you too – ”
Her voice broke and she could not say any more.
The King pulled her close to him.
“I know what you are feeling, my precious, and I am only so grateful that your mother is not here, because it would upset her so much.”
Attila was fighting hard against tears and could not speak as her father continued,
“I always wanted you to reign in my place when I died, but I think you will be too young. Therefore perhaps it would be for the best, as your stepmother suggests, if you make a life for yourself somewhere else.”
He gave a deep sigh.
“Being a Ruler brings a great number of problems and difficulties with it, which I feel would be too much for a woman. Therefore, my darling daughter, please consider what your stepmother has proposed.”
As the King finished speaking, he closed his eyes.
Although he did not say so, Attila was aware he did not wish to discuss the matter further.
She kissed her father before walking to the window wiping away her tears.
She stood staring at the garden bathed in sunshine.
With the spring flowers in bloom and the trees in blossom it looked very lovely.
‘How is it possible,’ Attila asked herself, ‘with so much loveliness around me that there should be the pain and horror of what my dear Papa has told me?’
How could she let him go?
Her whole life was centred on him, even though life had never been the same since her mother died.
She stood at the window for some minutes and then she became aware that her father had fallen asleep.
Very softly she tip-toed from the room, leaving the strawberries she had brought him beside his bed.
Outside Attila saw one of the aides-de-camp.
He was a gentleman she had never much cared for, as she believed he sucked up to her stepmother, flattering her and paying her fulsome compliments.
Attila was certain in her heart that he did not really mean them.
He had observed Attila emerging from the King’s bedroom and now bowing subserviently, he said,
“I was looking for Your Royal Highness.”
“Why?”
“Her Majesty the Queen has asked me to find you as she wishes you to join her in the blue drawing room.”
Attila felt no desire to talk with her stepmother and yet she knew it would be rude if she refused to do what the aide-de-camp requested.
She therefore slowly descended the stairs.
The blue drawing room was only used by the Royal family when they were not entertaining. The many grand State rooms in the middle of the Palace were too large and overpowering to be comfortable when they were alone.
Queen Margit was sitting at her writing table near the window and when Attila entered the room, she looked up and rose to her feet.
“Oh, there you are, Attila. They have been a long time in finding you. Where have you been?”
“I was with Papa.”
She saw her stepmother purse her lips together as if she was annoyed.
Then she sat down on the sofa.
“I want to talk to you.”
“What about?” enquired Attila. “I was just going to the stables.”
“The horses can wait. I want to talk to you about yourself.”
Attila sensed she knew what was coming.
“I think that is a very dull subject! I want to talk about Papa. I am extremely upset at learning that he is not well.”
To her surprise her stepmother gave what sounded like a laugh, a very artificial one at that.
“You must not believe all your father tells you. He has it in his head that he will not get better. The doctors tell me it is just part of his imagination. After all he is still a young man and I think it extremely unlikely that there is anything seriously wrong with him.”
Attila stared at her stepmother in astonishment.
After what her father had told her it was impossible to believe that she was telling the truth.
“What I am now determined is that as your father is a little distressed at the moment, he will not be made worse by anyone upsetting him.”
She
paused a moment before continuing,
“If there is any likelihood of him not getting better, I am sure he would be most worried about your future. To be quite frank, Attila, I think it would be best for you to marry and have a family of your own.”
There was silence for a moment then Attila replied,
“If Papa is seriously ill as he believes, he would, I know, want me to rule over Valdina as Queen Dorottya did so successfully.”
The Queen gave the scornful laugh.
“You really think that you could be as successful as Queen Dorottya? My dear child you do flatter yourself! Your great-great-grandmother was an exception to every rule. It is a great mistake, I assure you, for women to try to rule a country – they are seldom successful.”
There was a fraught silence.
Then Attila, who had been so well educated, could not resist responding,
“What about Queen Elizabeth of England? Surely no one could say that she was not the equal, if not superior, to the Kings who preceded and succeeded her.”
She knew as she spoke that her stepmother had not even heard of Queen Elizabeth, or if she had, knew very little about her.
“We are not concerned in any way,” Queen Margit retorted sharply, “with what happens in England or for that matter in any other country.”
She pursed her lips again.
“It is Valdina we are talking about and if there is to be a woman on the throne, she must be experienced enough to be capable of ruling this beloved country of ours as well as your father has done.”
There was a sudden shining light in her eyes.
It told Attila all too clearly that her stepmother definitely intended to take her father’s place.
She could almost imagine her informing the Prime Minister and all those concerned that she would make the perfect Queen for the country and that a young girl with no experience of the world would be a disaster.
Queen Margit broke the silence.
“I have now arranged,” she said firmly, “for Prince Otto of Dedregen to come here next week. He is anxious to meet you and I really think, dear child, you must not be surprised if he proposes marriage.”
She looked at Attila imperiously.
“It is an alliance that I am convinced would make your father very happy and I feel certain that is what you want him to be.”
She spoke in a most insistent manner, almost Attila thought as if she was trying to hypnotise her into obeying.
Slowly, and with a dignity that betrayed her Royal blood, Attila rose to her feet.
“I think, Stepmama, it is always a big mistake to anticipate what people will do or not do, especially when it concerns anything as serious as marriage.”
Her voice became very firm and determined.
“The one thing I can assure you is that I have no intention of marrying anyone I do not love and who does not love me for myself and not for my position in life.”
The Queen would have interrupted but she finished,
“That is all I have to say on this matter and I do not wish to discuss it again.”
She walked towards the door and had left the room before the Queen could answer her.
Outside in the hall Attila ran out of the front door and into the garden.
She was running away from what was frightening and disturbing her.
Her one idea at the moment was to be alone and she knew she must think clearly and decide what to do.
The sunshine was warm and the garden was ablaze with spring flowers, but Attila could think only of what her father had told her.
The future ahead now seemed to be covered by a growing darkness.
‘What can I do? What can I do,’ she asked herself.
She walked on past the fountains and the water lily pond. There was a profusion of almond trees in blossom everywhere and she reached the shrubbery.
The twisting path under the trees made her slow her pace.
Now she began to feel she could breathe again.
She walked on until she came to an opening in the trees that looked down on a little valley.
At the end, its roof just peeping above the branches was a little Chapel.
Attila knew it so well.
It was a very ancient Chapel that had been built by one of her ancestors, who retired there after she was widowed and never entered the Palace again.
Now the Chapel and the adjoining room were used by Father Jozsef.
He was a very old Priest whom she had known and loved ever since she was a small child and he had prepared her for Confirmation.
Because she had been busy with her father and with her tutors, she had not seen Father Jozsef for some time.
She thought now he was the one person who would understand the predicament she was in.
There was a twisting path beneath the trees leading down to the valley and when she reached the Chapel, she saw that the flowers were in bloom all around it.
She knew that they had always been the delight of Father Jozsef and he tended to them as if they were his children.
She went first into the Chapel, which was small but exquisite with its old carvings and beautiful stained-glass windows.
Father Jozsef was not present, but when she went round the back of the Chapel, she found him, as she might have expected, weeding his garden.
The Father was wearing an ancient cassock and his white hair was blowing a little in the breeze.
Although he was nearly eighty years of age, he still remained a handsome and prepossessing figure and Attila always believed it was his personality rather than his looks that captivated all who met him.
She stood watching him for a few moments before he turned round as if he instinctively sensed her presence.
He gave a cry of delight, threw down his trowel and walked towards her holding out his hands.
“My child, my beloved Princess, how glad I am to see you!” he exclaimed.
“And I to see you. You must forgive me, Father Jozsef, if I have neglected you lately, but Papa is not well and I spend every moment I can with him.”
“I have heard your father is in ill health and I have been praying for him, as I know you would have expected me to do.”
“He needs your prayers badly and I, Father, need your help.”
He smiled at her.
“Let us sit down,” he suggested.
They walked towards a wooden seat on one side of his garden.
They sat down and Father Jozsef enquired,
“Tell me what is worrying you. You know, if it is at all possible with God’s help, I will solve your problem for you.”
Attila smiled.
“I knew you would say that to me, Father, and as I am worried, very very worried, I have come to you as I have done ever since I could toddle.”
“I know and a very pretty little toddler you were. As you know, Attila, I have loved you as if you were my own daughter ever since you were born.”
Attila put out her hand and slipped it into his.
“Help me,” she pleaded, “because I not only need it badly, but I am so very frightened.”
“I am listening, my child.”
Attila told him what she had overheard outside her father’s door and what the King had said to her.
Next she repeated her stepmother’s words and saw his lips tighten.
“I have just left my Stepmama,” she finished, “and instinctively without really thinking about it I came straight to you.”
“It was God who directed you knowing it was the most sensible thing you could do, my child.”
“I am so so terrified, Father. Terrified that she will force Papa to agree to my marriage and if he begs me to do it for his sake, it will be very hard for me to refuse.”
Father Jozsef nodded as if he agreed this was likely to happen.
Then he said firmly,
“There is one thing I am completely sure about and it is that under no circumstances must you marry His Royal Highness Prince Otto.”
“A great deal and I can only say that it is impossible for you, pure innocent and unspoilt as you are, to marry such a man.”
“Then what can I do? Stepmama wishes to be rid of me and she will somehow contrive, just as she has done before, to make Papa agree.”
She paused for a moment.
“And I can tell you about enumerable times when against his better inclination, dear Papa has agreed simply because it is easier than opposing her.”
Father Jozsef did not speak and Attila carried on,
“I am convinced in my own mind that she wants to rule when Papa dies, as if she was Queen Dorottya.”
“It would not surprise me,” remarked Father Jozsef.
“If she really cared for others, I would not mind, but she is not in any way interested in anyone but herself even though she pretends to be.”
She sighed.
“When the servants are ill she is only angry because it is inconvenient. If she hears of any trouble in the City or anywhere else in Valdina, she will not listen.”
She made a gesture of helplessness with her hands.
“She has been heard to say when someone asks for help, ‘you got yourself into this mess, you had better find your way out of it. It is not my business’.”
“I don’t think,” reflected Father Jozsef, “that the Government or the people of Valdina would allow Queen Margit to take the throne, but of course if you were married and lived elsewhere, there would in fact be no one else who had any right to it.”
Attila sighed again.
“If only I had a brother or been born a boy!”
Father Jozsef smiled.
“I think you will find that there are a great number of men who are pleased you are a woman. Is there no man in your life for whom you have any affection?”
“Of course not. I never meet any young men. My Stepmama will only entertain those who are distinguished and important and this means they are usually as old as Papa. Even Prince Otto, whom I believe is under thirty, would never be invited to the Palace unless he was the heir to a throne.”
“It was very different when your dear mother was alive. Then she received everyone and the people loved her because they knew she loved them.”
“I have missed her more than I can ever say,” Attila sighed, “and I miss her so much now. Oh, Father Jozsef, you are the only person who can help me.”
A Princess Prays Page 2